Read Bruises of the Heart Online
Authors: J. J. Nite
"I still think it's too early, but I'll help you in any way I can. You just have to ask. You'll have to actually open up your mouth and say the words, even though I know you don't like to do that. This time you have to."
I just smiled at him. I didn't want to admit I might be asking for a lot of help, and I did hate asking for anything. I hadn't yet had the chance to tell him I loved him, either. It just never seemed to be the right time, which was very frustrating. Someone was always around, or I felt weird just coming out and saying it without it being the right moment.
"You should also be ready to answer some questions about us when you get back. A couple people were asking what was going on between us or if there was anything going on," Noah told me.
"What did you say?" I asked looking at my hands.
"To be honest, I wasn't sure what to tell them. I just shrugged them off, but they will be lying in wait to ask you the same questions. What are you going to say?"
"What do you want me to say?"
He looked at me with an exasperated expression. "I would be thrilled if you told everyone that we were back together, but I'm not sure we are or that you're ready to be. I know you remember I said I would wait for as long as it took, and I will, but you might want to think of something that will get everyone off of your back."
"What if I told you that I love you? That I never really stopped loving you? I just had to get back there on my own time." The stunned expression I received made me smile. "I guess I could have said that a different way. I've been trying to tell you for days, but there was always someone around, or it just didn't seem like the right time to announce I would be very content to spend the rest of my life with you right here in this impossibly small town. And if you ever try to make any big decisions without me again, I might just shoot you. I'm actually a pretty good shot."
"Wait a minute. I'm still back on the 'I love you' part. You do love me? This isn't some kind of crazed joke brought on by the wrong mix of medication?"
I just shook my head and smiled at him.
"I can't believe you chose this moment to tell me. I can't pick you up and spin you around or squeeze the breath out of you," he said, looking happier than I had ever seen him.
"Well, my lips aren't as bruised anymore, and the swelling is almost completely gone," I said, smiling at Noah.
He almost pounced, but remembered at the last moment to be gentle. It was a soft, yet passionate kiss I would remember for the rest of my life.
I don't know how long we kissed, but I became aware of someone clearing her throat behind us. The kiss ended rather quickly. Craning my neck around so I didn't hurt my ribs, I saw Mom standing by the door with one of her eyebrows raised and a half-smile on her face.
"I don't mean to interrupt, but I was wondering if you wanted to try a walk down to the barn and see Lily's foal."
"Yes!" Not being able to run down there the minute I had gotten home from the hospital had almost killed me. Now I was healing and better able to walk. I was chomping at the bit to get down there and see the new little foal that had been born while I'd lain on the barn floor bleeding that night.
It took twice as long to walk down, but it was well worth it. She was the prettiest thing I had seen in a long time, black as midnight with a white blaze on her nose. She was already showing she was going to be high-spirited.
"What did Grandma name her?" I asked, looking at her through the slats of the stall.
"She didn't yet. I think she was waiting for you to help her with that."
I stood and watched the foal for as long as I could, but too soon I had to leave and walk even more slowly back to the cabin. Once there, Noah helped me lie back down on the couch and Mom brought me a pain pill.
"I'm not going to be conscious for much longer. You should go home," I told Noah.
"No, I'm going to stay right here until your mom kicks me out. Now that I have you back officially, I have no desire to leave you ever again."
"That might create some problems, you know. Your parents might like to see you again, and I'm quite sure my mom isn't going to let you move in."
"Yeah, I doubt that would ever happen. Just rest, and if I'm not here when you wake up, I'll see you soon."
I felt his lips brush my forehead as I drifted off to sleep. My last conscious thoughts were of him and how happy I was. I couldn't wait to get better so he could squeeze the breath out of me.
****
The next day, after only three hours at school, I was in so much pain I could barely get out of the car when Mom brought me home. I was fairly certain I was going to die.
"Just shoot me. It couldn't hurt any worse than this."
"Maybe it was too soon to go back to school. You don't have to go back tomorrow if you don't want to," she said as she helped me to the couch and gave me my pain medication.
"I'm going to miss too much if I don't go back."
"You won't be able to concentrate and learn anything, either, if you are in so much pain. I really think you need to wait until Monday. I'm sure Tara and Noah will bring you whatever you need from school, and with Noah spending every moment he possibly can here, he can answer any questions you have as well."
"Do you mind that he's here?"
"No, I don't. I know you love each other and I remember what that's like. I just wish everything would resolve quickly so we can move on and stop looking over our shoulders. Now, get some rest and don't worry about school. You'll see. It will all work out."
"I hope so, because I'm not sure I can do this again tomorrow. My head is pounding, and walking up the stairs was not as easy as I remember it being. In fact, I'm pretty sure my ribs weren't just cracked, but broken. The doctors must have missed it on the x-rays."
She just laughed and gently put a blanket over me. I assumed she would be going back to work, but I heard her pull out a chair at the kitchen table instead. I would have asked what she was doing, but I fell asleep before I could.
I woke up some time later to the sound of lowered voices talking in the kitchen. Shifting myself carefully, I looked over the back of the sofa to see who was talking and found myself smiling. My mom and Noah were sitting at the table, having a comfortable chat.
That was why I loved my mom so much. She treated my friends and my boyfriend like real people. I knew from others that their parents were nowhere near as comfortable around their friends, and everyone who met my mom told me how cool she was.
Noah glanced over at the couch and his face lit up with a smile. "Hey, sleepyhead. Did you have a good nap?"
"I guess. What are you doing here? Shouldn't you still be in school?"
"It's almost four o'clock. You've slept most of the day," Noah said, getting up to come and sit on the couch with me. "Your mom told me that you were going to wait until Monday to go back."
"Yeah, after today I think that would be for the best. By Monday I should be feeling a lot better, and I won't mind the fact that everyone is staring at me. My face has to look better by then, right?"
"You're beautiful no matter how many bruises you might have, but if we could try to minimize the number, that would be very much appreciated. Was it horrible today?" Noah asked.
"I think I was more bothered by all of the attention than the pain, but in the end the pain won out. Did you hear anything after I left?"
"I heard nothing, but Tara will have heard more than I would have, anyway. You know how she is," Noah said, taking my hand.
"She has a gift. How was your day? I didn't get to talk to you," I said, squeezing his hand.
"It was good. I was worried about you, though, like I always am. Did you name the foal yet?"
"Midnight. My grandma was in full agreement. She's beautiful. I can't wait to help train her."
We spent the rest of our time together talking and doing homework. When I started to get tired, he left with the promise to come back after school tomorrow.
I got ready for bed
â
with a little help
â
and actually slept in my own room that night. It felt so good to slide in between the crisp cotton sheets that still smelled like the sun they'd been dried in.
After taking as deep a breath as I could, sleep came quickly, but I wasn't allowed to remain blissfully unaware in sleep's comforting embrace. The old, terrifying dream was back. It was slightly different, but no less frightening as the images formed and invaded my sleep state.
I was walking down the center aisle of the barn toward Lily's stall when an un-hooded Will stepped out of the shadows at the end of the barn. Stopping so quickly I stumbled, I felt the cold fear start to creep over my limbs, rooting me to the spot.
Will smiled sadistically and started down the aisle toward me. I tried to move, to open my mouth and scream, but I stood still and no sound emerged from the parched recesses of my mouth.
"Victoria, I told you that this wasn't over yet," he jeered.
I finally managed to turn around and ran into something very solid, but warm. Looking up, I saw ice-blue eyes as hard as diamonds focused on Will, not me. He knew I was scared, and that was why my avenging angel has come to save me.
Without saying a word, he pushed me behind him and took a step forward. I grabbed the back of his shirt
â
not because I didn't want to be left behind, but because I was scared for him. I didn't know what I would do if anything happened to him.
Will pulled his hand from behind his back, brought up a pistol, and aimed it at Noah. I tried to scream a warning, but there was no sound. I watched, paralyzed, as he pulled the trigger and Noah staggered backward.
I was suddenly staring at the ceiling of my room, drenched in sweat. The scream I hadn't been able to get out in the dream was dying in the still night air, and I could hear my mom's feet quickly approaching my room.
"I'm fine," I said, carefully sitting up as the door flew open. "Just a really bad dream is all."
"Are you sure? It sounded like you were in pain. Is there something that you need?" she asked.
"No, nothing."
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"Not really. I'd like to forget about it, actually," I said, not wanting her to know I was terrified.
"Okay, well
â¦
if you need anything, all you have to do is just call out and I'll be here," she said, smiling at me.
"Thanks."
I lied carefully back down and tried to calm my frantically beating heart. I was terrified that somehow my dream was some kind of vision that would come true, and I would lose Noah just like my mom had lost my dad. Only I wouldn't have a baby to remember him by like Mom did.
Hoping that something bad wasn't going to happen was useless. With Will still out there somewhere and the police not able to find him at any of the properties from the list his father was finally forced to give them, the case was at a standstill until someone saw him and reported it.
Dozing on and off was the best I could do for the rest of the night. I saw the sun rise. Never before had I really appreciated it quite like that morning. What an incredible sight. I was truly thankful to still be around to see it.
After struggling to get ready for another day of sitting on the couch, I received what was becoming the daily lecture about locking all the doors and not going out until someone else came by. Once my mom left, I started on the schoolwork I was getting further behind on and waited for school to let out so I could get the scoop from Tara. I was sure she would be by today, and I was hoping she would distract me from the memories of the dream still flitting around the periphery of my mind.
True to herself, Tara never disappointed. She went on and on about who was dating who and what everyone thought about the fact Noah and I were back together. There were also a few tidbits about what everyone had thought when they had seen my badly bruised face. Apparently, those who had been on the fence about their feelings were solidly in my corner now. It didn't really matter what everyone else thought about the whole mess, but it did make me feel better knowing most, if not everyone, knew Will was the spawn of the devil.
She left when Noah showed up, and I breathed a sigh of relief seeing him walk through the door. My dream had been affecting me all day, but now that he was with me, it all faded away. I gifted him with a smile and he returned it.
We sat with our heads together, saying nothing, just kissing occasionally. "What's bothering you, Tori?" he asked, trying to read my face.
"Nothing is bothering me. Why do you ask?"
"I don't know. There's just something about the way you looked at me when I came in
â¦
almost like relief. Is Tara that bad?" he joked, smiling.
"No, she was able to distract me today, which was what I needed. I just had a really weird dream last night that's been bothering me all day. No big deal."
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"Not really. It was kind of creepy and I would really rather just forget about it."