Beyond Control (21 page)

He threw his hand into the air. “You can count on it. I won’t say a word.”

“It’s not like we’re actually seeing each other,” I said. “We’ve only been out a few times.”

“Gabby, don’t fool yourself,” Aaron said, surprising me. “I didn’t catch on right away, but after last night I thought about the timing of things.”

“Yeah?” I furrowed my brow, waiting for him to spit out whatever he was implying.

“Well, he’s been through some really tough shit, and until recently I wasn’t sure I’d ever see a smile from him again. I realized last night you must be the reason he started to get back to his old self,” Aaron said.

“How so?” I asked, completely confused. From the moment I met him, he seemed completely at ease and definitely enjoying his life. I doubted I had anything to do with that.

“Listen. He’s faced a lot of dark times,” Aaron said, glancing over at Brandy. “If he hasn’t told you yet, it’s not my place to say.”

“Here we go again,” I muttered.

“No. I mean… You don’t want me telling him about your heart, right?” he asked.

I nodded.

“Same thing. It’s not my place. If things don’t work out between you two, then I’ll tell you. But as of now I don’t want to interfere. Deal?” he asked.

As much as I hated to admit it, my brother had a point and I respected him for it.

“Deal,” I said, nodding. “Do you know what time it is?”

Brandy grabbed her phone. “Almost eleven.”

“So he’s been in surgery for a few hours.” I exhaled. “At least Carla’s been able to get some sleep.”

I grabbed my phone and was surprised to find several texts from Jason, but not nearly as surprised as when I looked up to see him walking into the waiting room.

“You didn’t respond,” he apologized, glancing at Aaron and then back at me. “I just wanted to make sure you were handling everything all right. Aaron texted me this morning about your dad. I’m so sorry.”

Brandy and Aaron stood up quickly and began babbling about needing coffee, almost tripping over one another to get out of the waiting room, leaving us alone.

“I think I’m doing okay,” I confessed as he walked over to where I was sitting. “I’ve been feeling really horrible about the way I acted last night.”

“Don’t,” Jason said, gently raising my chin to look up at him.

“I know. I know,” I said, waving my hand in the air. “That’s what everyone says.”

“Honestly, I’m as baffled as everyone about why…” his voice trailed off, as he faced the same quandary as the rest of us—not wanting to speak poorly of someone who’s in a life or death situation.

“But it’s really nice having my brother back in my life, especially at a time like this.”

“I bet,” Jason said, sitting next to me. “Have you heard anything about your dad?”

“They rushed him in for surgery. And that’s all I know. I didn’t get here until he was already in surgery, and I convinced Carla to take a nap,” I told him. “I can’t believe this.”

“He seemed in such good shape,” he replied.

“He was. He used to be a smoker, but Carla finally got him to quit.” I spotted the couch against the far wall and Jason caught my gaze.

“Let’s move over there,” he suggested. “It’ll give us more room to spread out.”

I agreed and followed him to the two-seater couch that was just about as uncomfortable as the chairs we’d been sitting in. But without that extra armrest in between us, I found myself scooting into him a little closer.

“Ms. Sullivan?” a man’s voice asked.

I looked over to the entrance of the waiting room, where the doctor was standing.

“I’m his daughter, Gabby,” I said, slowly standing up. “Is he doing okay?”

“He’s doing wonderfully. He’s in recovery right now. Once he wakes up, he’ll be able to have visitors,” the doctor replied.

“Oh, thank heavens. Thank you so much. Let me go grab Carla and you can fill her in. She’d kill me if I let her sleep through your update.” I was almost skipping out of the room with the information about my dad.

I woke up Carla and gave her the great news on the way back to the waiting room. As the doctor explained the procedure he’d performed in detail, the tension that had built up all morning was quickly diminishing. Aaron and Brandy came in for the tail end of the discussion with more coffee in hand, and all I could think about was making amends with my dad. I didn’t understand his motives, but holding onto the anger would only hurt me. Jason had slid his arm around my waist as we listened to the doctor go over expectations once my dad went home, and I caught Aaron smiling and shaking his head as he noticed Jason’s moves. I guess that was what big brothers were for.

“So about that date tonight?” I teased, looking over at Jason. We had been at the hospital since early morning and much to my surprise he stayed by my side the entire time. He and Aaron even went out to grab lunch for us all so Carla and I wouldn’t miss my father waking up. I’d finally convinced Brandy that I’d be okay at the hospital and that it was okay for her to go home, which she did.

“Never a dull moment,” he laughed. “Want a rain check on that?”

Jason and I had snuck out to the hall while Carla and Aaron chatted quietly next to my dad’s bed. My dad had fallen back asleep but probably wouldn’t be out for long since the nurses had to come in and check vitals. Plus there was the glorious hospital dinner that would soon be arriving.

“I can’t believe I haven’t chased you away with all this drama. I swear I lead a much duller life in an average month,” I said, frowning.

“It’s been lively for sure.” He leaned against the wall and grinned, his expression beguiling.

“I know my brother really appreciated you sticking around today.”

“Your brother, huh?” His eyes gleaming as he crossed his arms.

“And maybe me,” I replied, flashing him a smile. “I would still be up for grabbing dinner tonight…”

“You’re not too tired?” he asked, a smile spreading across his lips.

“I’m beyond tired, but I’d love some amazing company and Brandy took the Jeep. Thought you could drop me off after dinner?”

“So I’m just your mode of transportation?” he joked.

“Something like that.”

“As rocky as my starts have been with you, I’ll take what I can get, how I can get it.” He took a step forward toward me as two nurses walked behind him to get into my father’s room.

“It hasn’t been that bad, has it?” I asked, my brow arching.

“No comment,” he replied, smiling.

I heard my father’s groggy voice coming from the room and knew I’d better return. We walked into the room just as the nurses were letting my father and Carla know that he’d get to go home tomorrow afternoon if everything continued to go as well as it had.

Aaron caught my gaze and nodded, smiling. I looked down at my father, tubes and cords everywhere monitoring his every move, and I saw a different man, probably the man he’d always been, afraid and searching my face for an answer to his silent question. He reached for my hand and squeezed it.

Nodding, I squeezed his hand back and forgave him silently as our eyes connected.

“I’m going to head out. Carla, if you need anything tomorrow or help getting him home, let me know,” I told her. I placed a quick kiss on his cheek and squeezed his hand one last time.

“I think we’ll be fine, but I’ll call you,” she said, the tension finally lessening.

“I’m going to head out as well,” Aaron said, glancing at the wall clock.

“Thank you both for being here,” my father said, his voice weak.

“I’m glad we
both
could be here,” I replied. And I meant it. I was glad my brother was finally back in my life.

I waved to my dad and Carla as Jason, Aaron, and I left the room. There was a definite awkwardness in that room, but once we reached the hallway it faded.

“We’re headed to grab a bite to eat,” I told my brother. “You’re more than welcome to join us.”

“Nah. I’m good,” Aaron said, glancing at Jason. “Don’t want to be the third wheel.”

“You wouldn’t be,” I told Aaron.

“It’s been a long day. I’m gonna head home,” Aaron said.

“Can’t say I didn’t try.” I shrugged, grinning.

“Well, since no one asked me, I’m glad it’s only going to be you and me,” Jason said, laughing. “Sorry, man. But I’ve had enough dinners with you to last a lifetime.”

“Feelings are mutual,” my brother shot back, laughing.

We made it to the hospital lobby, and I gave Aaron a quick hug before he took off toward the back of the hospital where he’d parked.

“I guess it’s just us now,” Jason whispered, looking down at me.

His words stirred an unexpected response within me, considering everything I’d been through.

“I actually had something planned back at the house, but I think I’ll save that for another day,” he said.

“Really? What did you have planned?” I asked, completely intrigued.

“You’ll have to find out on another day.”

I slid my hand into his as we walked into the cool night air.

“Did it have anything to do with spending a fabulous night with you because I’m not sure—”

“Whoa,” he laughed, helping me into his Jeep. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

“Whatever,” I shot back at him. “I’ve heard about you from my brother.”

“And you’re going to believe everything he tells you?” His brow arched as he closed the passenger door.

Climbing into the driver’s seat, he turned on the engine and glanced at me.

“So you and your brother?” he asked.

“I think it’s going to be fine. Good, actually. There might be some rocky times, but I don’t want to go in circles about things we can’t change. And after this happened with my dad, I feel the same way about him too.”

“I get it,” Jason replied. “But it’s okay to have emotions, you know. You don’t have to sweep everything under the rug and be done with it.”

He had turned onto one of the main streets leading into downtown Seattle. We were in a more industrial part of town, and there wasn’t much around for restaurants.

“Are you trying to stir the pot?” I laughed. But I knew exactly what he was getting at, and the fact that he figured it out so quickly about me had me worried. I had spent a decade learning the art of denial, the act of burying resentment, and the science behind superficial relationships. And I enjoyed that about me.

“No. Definitely not trying to stir the pot. But I think you’re in the habit of running once emotions surface. I think it’s a family trait, and I don’t want to get left in the dust,” Jason said softly. He glanced at me quickly as he turned onto the road leading to the piers.

“I’ll try to keep that in mind,” I replied. “My brother hinted that you have a dark side, but I haven’t seen it. Maybe, we all have our ways of dealing with things.”

I felt something shift between us as he turned toward the waterfront. His eyes were locked straight ahead, but I saw a glimmer of something I’d caught before at the coffee shop. There was something he wasn’t telling me, and I wanted to know what it was.

I hadn’t even picked up where we were going until we were already there. Driving up to the Ferry booth, Jason handed the worker the Ferry pass and drove to one of the open lanes, where he turned off the Jeep and turned to look at me. My heart fluttered as he leaned closer, gliding his thumb along my cheek. His eyes were intense as he stared down at me, his expression unreadable.

“Ever since you ran into me on the bridge, I haven’t been able to get you out of my mind,” he whispered. My heart was pounding as he tempted me with his lips so near mine. “You’ve brought light back into my life, Gabby. Hearing your dreams, and I don’t know… There’s this familiarity with you.” He caressed my arm with his hand as his eyes searched me hungrily.

“I feel it too,” I whispered, wanting his lips to touch down on mine. “I want to find out everything there is to know about you. Even your dark side.” I laughed nervously with my admission.

He cupped the base of my neck drawing me into him, and my eyes fell to his mouth. The desire to taste his lips stunned me. I had never wanted something so badly, and it was only a kiss. My body warmed with anticipation as his gaze dropped to my mouth. Our lips met in a hungry exploration, and the ache inside of me grew with each movement. My hands ran through his hair, pulling him into me, wanting more, so much more. Our kisses deepened with every moment that went by, but it left me craving something he couldn’t give me. Not here. Not now.

His hands ran down my spine with the lightest touch, causing me to shudder. He pulled back, his eyes connecting with mine, before he began softly placing kisses along my jaw. My eyes closed as I felt his lips move gently along my flesh, lowering with each kiss. He pulled his lips away from my skin as my breath hitched with anticipation. His eyes were filled with the same desire I felt, and I recognized the need that was growing in us both. And there was something different about him, his touch. He was aware of things as he traced along my body that no man had been aware of before.

His eyes darted over my shoulder and my heart sank. The ferry lines were moving. He ran his finger lightly over my bottom lip, leaving a tingling sensation in its wake.