Bang Gang (44 page)

I held it under the light, swollen knuckles. I’d had worse. I told her as much.

She sighed. “This isn’t how I wanted things to pan out.”

“What do you mean?”

She wouldn’t look at me. “I hoped we’d… talk… I had so much to say, but now…” She slapped her knees, dismissing the whole thing.

“Now what?”

“Now you’re angry, and I don’t know what to say anymore.”

“I’m not angry,” I said. “I’m just pissed off, Jo. Pissed off that those assholes had hold of our fucking daughter. Pissed off she lied, pissed off she was stupid, pissed off I didn’t stop her going.”

“And me? Are you pissed off at me, too? I said she could go, Darren. Do you not think I feel like shit, too? Do you not think I know this is my fault?”

I stared at her. “I’m not pissed off at you. I get it, I get you have to let her do this shit, I get she has to be allowed to be her own person.”

“So what now?”

I shrugged. “I don’t fucking know. She’s grounded for-fucking-ever, then there’ll be no fucking lads trying their luck, will there? She can be a fucking nun, Jodie, we’ll book her into the fucking convent when we’re at work, just so no pricks can come calling when we’re out.”

She smiled and tried to hide it, covered her mouth with
her hand.

“I’m not even joking,” I said. “You think I’m fucking joking, don’t you?”

Her smile turned into a laugh, that breathy giggle that comes when she’s relieved.

“See if I’m fucking joking when I get the vicar round next week.” I took a drag on my cigarette, and Jodie’s giggle caught me. A laugh caught in my throat, and I struggled to keep a straight face. She saw it. Saw the flash of a smile on my face, and it set her off. She laughed so hard she fell back with her hands on her belly and I laughed, too.

“Stop it,” I attempted, but it was pointless, I was on one myself, just the same as her.

“I’m sorry…”

“You’re fucking not,” I laughed.

She rolled on the sleeping bag, letting it all out, tension broken. I felt it too. That relief. That blissful fucking relief like a dam breaking.

The laughter eased off slowly, really fucking slowly, and it left something else in its place, a heaviness in the air, her eyes wide as she looked up at me, her pupils like big black pools.

“Thank you,” she said. “I don’t know what would’ve happened if you hadn’t been there.”

My chest pained. “It’s alright, Jo. I
was
there.”

She sighed. “But you’re not…
we’re
not…” She reached out for my hand, the swollen one. I flicked my cigarette through the door before she took it. She ran a thumb across my knuckles and it hurt like a bitch. I didn’t say anything. “You were wild, Darren. I’ve never seen you fly so hard.”

“They had our girl, Jo.”

She nodded. “I know…”

“Don’t try and tell me I shouldn’t have gone in like that. I’ll always go in like that if the girls need it, no matter what, Jo, whatever it takes. I’m not gonna say fucking sorry for it.”

She took a breath. “What makes you think I’d want you to?”

My hand was still in hers, her fingers were cold. “You don’t?”

She shook her head. “No. I don’t.” She pulled me towards her, ever so fucking slowly. “I love the way you love our girls, Darren. I love the way you look out for them. I love the way you’re there. I love how you’d do anything it took to keep them safe.” She paused. “Just like I would.”

“I love those fucking girls, Jodie. You know I do.”

And you. I fucking love you, too.

She nodded. “I know.”

I shifted towards her, shunted myself so I was propped on my side, my hand still in hers. “What’s going on here? We fucking talking or what? Where’s this all going?”

“I want to talk…” she said. “But I… I just need…”

“What?”

She pulled my arm around her and wriggled in to my side, and it felt so good. It felt really fucking good. “Hold me,” she said. “Please. Just for a minute.”

As if she needed to fucking ask. I squeezed her tight, pulled her close, her head in the crook of my shoulder, my breath in her hair. “It’s alright now, Jo. Everything’s alright.”

Her breathing slowed, fingers gliding up my arm and back again. Her leg shifted, hooked over mine.

Christ, it was the most natural fucking move in the world to pull her on top of me. Her legs fell so perfectly between mine, her tits to my chest, her face in my face. I brushed her hair back from her forehead and looked at her, really looked at her.

She looked absolutely fucking beautiful.

She smiled a shy smile. “What?”

“Just you,” I said.

“Just what about me?”

Just that I love you, Jodie. I’ve always fucking loved you.

I brushed her cheeks with my thumbs, then held her there, pulled her face to mine. She tasted of wine and smelled of the smoke from the barbeque outside. She squirmed against me as we kissed, and I slipped my hands down her back, grabbed hold of that pretty ass of hers and shunted her tight against my cock. She moaned, ever so quietly, grinding her hips as I pushed against her. I helped her out of her jacket, pulled her top off over her head, and she raised herself enough to strip me of mine.

Skin to skin, just a flimsy bra between her tits and my chest. I had her out of it in a beat, and the cold hardened her nipples, they felt like bullets against my thumbs.

She loosened her jeans and wriggled them down, her knickers with them, and she was naked, naked and fucking horny, guiding my fingers to her clit.

She straddled me, leaning back with her hands braced on my thighs. My thumb flicked at that tight little bud, and she rocked back and forth, her head tipped back as the sensations took her.

Her tits looked so fucking good in the lamplight, rippling as she moved, nipples dark and hard, just begging for my mouth.

I pinned her clit with my thumb and she moaned.

“
More
,” she hissed. “
Like that…”

I gave her more like that. I gave her enough that she shuddered, squirming around like a fucking cowgirl. She arched her back and I slipped two fingers inside her, curled them to find the spot.

“
Stay still
,” she said. “
Don’t move…
”

I didn’t move, just stared up at her as she circled her hips, rode my fingers until she was squelching, her cunt sucking at my fingers and begging for fucking more. Her eyes were closed, her bottom lip between her teeth, her breath coming in short, sharp rasps.

She came hard, stifled by the back of her hand, her whole body tense, bouncing on my fingers.

I wriggled my way out of my jeans as she recovered, and she didn’t miss a fucking beat, just took my cock in her hand and lowered herself straight on. I let out a grunt as her pussy took me right in, and she leaned forward, pressing her lips to mine as I thrust up at her.

“Stop,” she whispered. “Don’t move… let me…”

It was fucking bliss as she rode me, big slow circles of her hips, torturously fucking perfect. She pinned my wrists above my head and moved like a fucking wildcat, all feline and slinky, so fucking smooth I felt like I was floating in silk.

I let her lead, staring up in fucking wonder as she writhed and rocked, taking all of me. It took everything I had not to flip her over and pound the holy fuck out of her.

But I would’ve been cheating myself.

She lifted herself clear of my dick, and I braced myself, my body knowing her moves on instinct, memories I’d never forget. She gripped my cock and shifted forwards, and I felt the tight ring of her ass. Oh fuck, it felt so fucking divine as she lowered herself onto me, so fucking slowly, painfully fucking slowly.

Her ass was made to take my fucking dick, always had been. It was as good now as it’d ever been, so fucking good I could have shot my load before I was even all the way in.

I could hear the chatter outside, the laughter of people on the piss just a couple of feet away. I could feel the chill in the air, far too cold to be fucking naked in a tent, but nothing mattered. Nothing fucking mattered, just the way it felt to be inside her.

She kept her face a few inches from mine, her eyes staring straight down at me. Her hair tickled my cheeks, rippling as she lifted herself up and down.

She changed angle and let out a gasp, her pussy grinding against me, her movements frantic.

“That feels so good,” she said. “Fuck, Darren… don’t move… please don’t move…”

I didn’t. I didn’t fucking move, just let her do her thing.

My balls tightened, my cock pulsing as she teased me to the brink. I held back, held it off, breathed my way through it until she shuddered, her breath sharp.

“God,” she hissed. “Oh God, Darren… oh fuck…”

“That’s it,” I said. “That’s it, Jo…”

Her pussy clenched as she came and her asshole tightened with it. It sent me over the edge, thrusting up at her like a man fucking possessed. I came deep and hard, pulling my hands free to grab her hips and force her down onto my cock and hold her there. I held her tight, held her still, unloading my balls right the way inside, and I never wanted to stop, never wanted to pull out, never wanted this to fucking end.

“Fuck,” she murmured. “I can’t even… that feels so…”

“I know,” I said. “I fucking know it, Jo.”

I pulled her forwards, skin to skin as our breathing calmed. I could feel her racing heart against mine. I wrapped her in my arms and held her tight.

I was breathing so loud I hardly heard her, hardly heard the whisper that came from her mouth.

“
I love you.
”

I couldn’t quite believe it, my belly fucking lurching at the thought, in case I’d misheard, in case I’d got it wrong, in case I’d…

“
I love you, Darren,” she repeated. “I never stopped loving you.”

My mouth was dry, eyes wide as I took her face in my hands and
made her look at me.

She looked so shy, so unsure, hardly the minx that had ridden me senseless a few short minutes back.

I brushed her lip with my thumb, stared right into her eyes, willing myself to say the words, willing myself just to put it out there. I took a deep breath, and kissed her lips, held her there until the words would come.

“I love you, too,” I said.

I hadn’t realised how close people were outside. I could hear everything, every laugh, every drunk bit of banter, and the embarrassment flushed hard, knowing they’d probably heard me, too.

I was reeling a little, reeling that he’d told me he loved me, reeling that I’d said it first, that I’d been the one to raise the bar, to make this
something
. Worrying that he didn’t mean it, that he’d only said it because I’d said it first.

But no. I’d seen it in his eyes.

I pulled on my clothes, and he pulled on his, and I said I should get back to the girls, and he agreed. He kissed my head before he unzipped the tent, and I crawled out into the open, burning up afresh as people turned to stare.