Bang Gang (38 page)

I put my phone on the nightstand and smiled to myself, daring myself to live, just a little. To be reckless, just a little.

A safe amount.

An amount of reckless that wouldn’t hurt anyone.

I picked up my phone for the last time before I went to sleep. One final message to Tonya.

I think I might just do that. xx

I was outside Jodie’s well in time to take the girls to school. They seemed to be in their usual spirits, just like any other school day. Ruby screamed blue fucking murder when I told her it was Mia’s turn to sit up front.

It’s not fairrrr! I wanna go up front! That’s my seat!

Not today it wasn’t.

She sulked in the backseat, but that would have to do. I wanted to keep
an eye on Mia.

I parked up by the bus stop, and today I cut the engine and got out with her. I stood with her while we waited, scoping out the kids around.

None of them put a foot wrong, full of smiles and hellos like butter wouldn’t fucking melt.

Tyler Dean saw me from up the road. He stopped, looked unsure of himself, like the little weasel he was.

Come on, dipshit
.

He walked so fucking slowly. Dawdling like a prick, pretending to check out his phone.

I waited. I’d gladly wait all fucking day.

He stayed well away from us, huddled with a few of his dickhead mates, but they were all quiet as mice. They wouldn’t even look at Mia.

“Alright, lads,” I called. I lit up a cigarette. “I’d best not be hearing about any bullshit going down on the bus today, or the shit’s gonna fly. Do you fucking hear me?”

A load of nods, a load of mumbles.

“Tyler,” I snapped. I waited until he met my eye. “I’m gonna be here tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after, and every fucking day after that, so I’d think very fucking carefully about the seat you choose on that bus, understand?”

He nodded. “Yes, Mr Trent.”

Pussy assed prick.

The bus pulled up and Mia smiled at me. I kissed her head, ruffled her hair. She smoothed it back down again, gave me a tut.

“See you later, Dad.” She looked back at me from the doorway. “Thanks.”

I slapped the side of the bus as it pulled away, gave her a wave as she looked out the window.

Ruby was up front when I got back in the truck. “Still should have punched him in the mouth,” she said. “He’s a prick.”

I smiled. “Yes, Rubes, he’s a fucking prick alright.”

We were late for school, I pulled up on the verge just as the kids were filing in to class. The mums all stared at me, whispering like usual – probably commenting on my sack of shit parenting skills – but none of that mattered. None of their bullshit ideals had ever meant shit to me.

“Be good,” I said as I waved her off. “No garage words, alright? Try your hardest not to butt-hurt anyone.”

She rolled her eyes. “I’ll try,” she leaned in close, put her hands around her mouth. “But butt-hurting stupid idiots is so fun.”

She gave me the thumbs-up, and I couldn’t stop laughing all the way to the fucking yard.

That girl was my fucking daughter, alright.

The lads were already at work when I got there. The banter eased up as I stepped through the shutters, just the sound of the radio blaring out the same old shit.

“Alright?” I said.

“Yeah,” Buck said. “Opened up early. Just getting our heads down, got shit-loads on.”

I counted the breakdowns lined up outside. “Good call.”

He cleared his throat. “We were hoping for a bit of time, if Eleanor…”

I nodded. “Get this backlog down, then.”

Petey dished out the drinks, then got down to it, checked out the diagnostics set up with Buck. He was learning, I could see it. Good lad.

I wondered how he was going with Lorraine, then checked myself. It was none of my business how he was getting on with Lorraine, none of my business how he was getting on with any of it.

I didn’t want it to be my business.

Not anymore.

I checked out Cheryl
Neath’s old blue Fiesta outside. The thing was fucked. Head gasket. Poor cow. I slammed the bonnet closed as an engine purred onto our yard. Nice, but no Porsche, thank fuck.

Lee Pullen was behind the wheel of a big silver Audi convertible. He pulled up next to me, wearing shades in fucking October, daft prick.

“What do you think?” he said.

I can’t stand convertibles. Wouldn’t have one if someone fucking paid me, but I gave him a nod.

“She’s alright, yeah. My Ruby would go mad for her, she loves Audis.”

“A girl with taste,” he said.

I gave it a look, thing must have set him back a small fucking fortune, the car was only just past warranty, judging by the plates.

“Was hoping you’d check her over for me. Got a month’s no quibble guarantee from the dealer.”

“Can do,” I said. I tipped my head towards the empty spot in the garage. “Pull her in there.” He parked her up and handed me the keys. “Pick her up end of day,” I said. “I’ll get on it after lunch.”

He slapped my arm. “Cheers, Trent.”

The lads were impressed, I could tell. I was more interested in making sure Ruby got to see it, maybe even give her a spin with the roof down. Needed to test drive the thing anyway. She’d love that.

The next job was a fucking nightmare, had to get Petey to give me a hand with the hoist, taking the whole bastard engine out of a Mercedes. I was covered in oil in no time, black with the fucking stuff before Petey had made the next round of tea.

I heard another car pull onto the yard, turned my head in recognition. No fucking way. My heart beat faster, my stomach doing this daft sappy flip.

Jodie looked great. Her hair was glossy and straight, her smile bright. She was wearing tight black jeans with her old sandals, a floaty blouse with a beaded necklace that made her look like she was from one of those holiday brochures.

She got a box from the backseat and I met her by the doors.

I’d never have known she was nervous if I didn’t know her so well, hadn’t noticed the flush on her neck.

The lads gave her a wave but laid off the whistling. Just as well.

“You alright?” I said. “Girls alright?”

She nodded. “I was just…” She didn’t look at me. “Nanna wanted a bacon and egg sandwich, so I went to the shop, on a mission…” Her eyes crept up. “I was going to go to ladies who lunch, but Nanna hasn’t asked for breakfast in ages… and I thought… I thought I may as well…” The smell hit me as she lifted the top of the box. Five sandwiches, wrapped up nice in foil. “For you, and the guys.”

“Thanks,” I said. “That’s really nice, Jo.”

I took the box from her and handed it to Buck to dish out, and she smiled as the guys called thanks. Then she hovered.

“…It was no trouble, I was cooking anyway. I mean I have Monday mornings off… usually… it’s my free time…” She cleared her throat. Looked really shifty. “Are you… busy?”

“Mondays always are,” I said.

She nodded. “Sorry, yeah… of course… I’d, um… I’d better leave you to it.”

She wouldn’t look at me.

I noticed her lipstick, the way she was so made up. I caught a whiff of perfume, the expensive shit she gets from her mum every Christmas. She had her best earrings in, the set Nanna bought for her 21st birthday, I could see them sparkling through her hair. Her nails were the same bronze colour as the beads around her neck.

She pointed to the Audi. “Ruby would go crazy for that.”

“I’ll take her out for a spin in it later.”

“She’ll love you forever.”

I gave her a nod, a smile. Still she didn’t move. She brushed her hair behind her ear, jangled her car keys in her hand, but didn’t move.

“What you really doing here?” I asked, my voice low. “This isn’t just about bacon sandwiches, Jo, is it?”

She sighed, and her cheeks
were pink. She smiled to herself and shook her head, then stepped away, heading back to her car with quick little steps. “I’d better leave you to it,” she said.

I headed her off before she could get in, and I felt as awkward as she looked, my mouth dry at the thought of reading this shit wrong.

But no. There’s plenty of shit I get wrong, but knowing when a woman’s after my dick isn’t ever on that list.

“Jo…” I began. “Let’s call a spanner a fucking spanner a second, shall we?” I looked her up and down. “If I didn’t know better, I’d almost think you were trying to bag yourself a bit of rough on a Monday morning.” My eyes met hers and locked there. Her pupils were big and dark, her breath shallow. “There wouldn’t be any truth in that, would there?”

She looked so fucking embarrassed, and so fucking pretty for it.

“Enjoy your breakfast, Darren,” she said. She made to sidestep me, but there was no fucking way.

I moved between her and the car door, and we collided. She recoiled with a smile, but I leaned into her. I could smell her perfume so strong, her shampoo too. Her hair was soft against my cheek.

Uneasiness in my gut. A sense of sadness as the prospect dawned.

I whispered, right into her ear. “What’s this about, Jo? You wanting to jump the queue or what?” I felt her stiffen, shoulders tense. “If this is about a Bang Gang special…”

She was shaking her head before I finished. She pulled away enough to meet my eyes. “Jesus, Darren. No! This isn’t about a bloody gangbang! I didn’t even…” She sighed. “This was stupid. Sorry.” She reached for the handle. “I don’t know what’s come over me this morning. Ridiculous.”

Me. I’ll come over you this morning.

My voice was just a growl in her ear. “I’m less than ten seconds from hauling your pretty ass over to that Audi and fucking you on the bonnet.” I felt her take a breath. “Tell me that’s not why you’re here. Tell me I’ve got it wrong.”

Her heart was racing. I could feel it. “I wanted… I want…”

“Go on,” I prompted. “Just fucking say it, Jo.”

I wrapped my arm around her waist, grabbed her ass and hitched her against me. My cock pressed to her belly and she gasped.

“I came here for you,” she whispered. “I wanted…”

I tangled my oily fingers in her hair, and it felt so fucking good. “Say it.”

“I wanted…” Her eyes were wide, her lips just a breath from mine. “Oh God, please just fuck me, Darren.”