Wrestling Against Myself (43 page)

 

“That sucks.”

 

“Big time. Coach commanded me not to work out until I get my body fat tested. I can't even use the mats after school anymore.”

 

Courtney frowned. “Are you going to lose your abs?”

 

“Probably not. It's not like I plan on binging on ice cream and cake. I'm just not going to do any working out. Maybe it's for the best, the body needs time to relax and adjust.”

 

“That's good. I would hate for you to lose your abs.”

 

“Why's that?”

 

“For one, I never got the chance to see them,” Courtney said with a slight smile.  

 

“You're too much. But I've seen them and I like them.”

 

The girl looked as if she were trying to swallow a smile, which only left Tony to wonder what the girl was thinking about. 'Probably thinking how silly I'm being,' Tony thought to himself as he drove towards her house. 'For all my talk about putting God first, I probably shouldn't be fixated on my body.'

 

“Thank you for getting dressed up for my mom,” Courtney changed the subject.

 

“Maybe I got dressed up for you instead,” Antonio teased.

 

“I wish.”

 

Tony gave the girl a sideways glance, but decided to let the comment slide. After all, she was still a little kid. “I know how much parents appreciate the little things a person does to show them respect. It's the least I could do for steak.”

 

“Cool! My mom wants to talk to you and we'll probably eat around six. I know it's a long time to hang around, I hope you don't mind?”

 

“Not at all. I once waited six hours at this
guy’s house because his dad wanted to meet me. We wound up playing video games until I got a blister on my finger.”

 

“Ouch,” Courtney grimaced. “We don't have video games; we got a basketball hoop or television.”

 

“With what Coach just said, maybe it's best we stick to television or talking.”

 

“My mom can talk for hours. She's really smart and knows a lot of things.”

 

“That's good. Now stop being nervous. I'm the one who is meeting your mom, she already knows you.”

 

Courtney giggled. “I'll try.”

 

Tony pulled into the girl's driveway and shut the engine off. He got out of the car and made his way to the passenger side before Courtney had a chance to unbuckle her seat belt. Antonio opened the door for the younger girl.

 

“Thank you. Did you do that because my mom is watching from the window?”

 

Tony shook his head. “Nah, I always do stuff like that. I would open the door when you got in the car too, but you always beat me there after school.”

 

“Cool. We better head in.”

 

Tony followed the girl as she led him up a brick paved walkway.

 

Just as he was about to enter under the small archway where the white front door was, Antonio noticed movement behind one of the windows as if a person who had been peeking through the blinds decided to retreat. He laughed to himself, all this time he thought it was a joke that Courtney's mom was spying on them, he never realized that it was the truth.

 

Courtney opened the door and walked through, but allowed Antonio to follow before closing the door behind him. “And this is my house,” she said softly, as if their arrival was a secret and she didn't want to get caught.

 

Antonio looked at the high ceilings and the gray slate tile floors. The house looked larger on the inside. It was quite the elegant abode, but didn't look kid friendly. Even for a teenager, things shouted out 'do not touch.' There were glass and ceramic knickknacks around the foyer on sturdy wooden shelves that looked so fragile that Tony was afraid to get up close to them. He felt as if he breathed too heavy, they might topple over and break.

 

Courtney led Tony into a side room where one wall was dominated by a huge flat screen television that must have come close to 80 inches. A deep brown leather sectional lined the walls on two sides and bracketed a large round glass coffee table that was littered with various remote controls that were organized in some fashion that he could figure out.

 

“This is our living room,” Courtney announced. “It's great for watching movies and probably for watching football too, but I don't care for that much.”

 

“I bet it's great for movies,” Tony said, awestruck at the sheer size of the screen. “If the movie theater ever has need, they can borrow your TV to have a midnight viewing.”

 

“I guess,” Courtney said with a shrug. “Wait here. I'll be right back with my mom.”

 

“Great,” Tony responded with as much enthusiasm as if he getting a tooth pulled.

 

“Don't leave,” the small girl said and then scampered out the door.

 

Tony was left to his own devices and explored the room as much as he dared. As in most family living rooms, there was no shortage of framed pictures hanging on the wall or sitting on various surfaces. Her dad was quite the sports star in his younger days, there were pictures of him both in high school and college in either a football or basketball uniform. There were wedding pictures and baby photos, but nothing recent of Courtney. There were a few pictures of her when she was younger, and even then, as a small, short haired little kid, it was hard to imagine her as anything but a girl.

 

“So this is Tiny,” a voice said behind him as he was looking at a family vacation portrait and was trying to decide if it was taken in Arizona or not.

 

Antonio turned around. A tall red headed woman stood inside the doorway with Courtney at her side. “And you must be Mrs. Barnes.”

 

“That would be me,” the woman said politely as she eyed the boy. “So this is the king of Dunedin?”

 

Tony let out a nervous chuckle. “I never heard that one before.”

 

Mrs. Barnes smiled. “That's my take on things. Before enrolling Courtney at school the administration and teachers spoke highly of you. When they said you were large, I thought they meant chubby.”

 

“They probably did mean chubby,” Tony admitted as he relaxed. “I went through a transformation this summer that took most the staff off guard.”

 

“You weren't the only one who went through a transformation,” Mrs. Barnes said tongue in cheek.

 

“Mom!” Courtney whined in protest.

 

“Just out of curiosity,” Tony said as Courtney's mom shot the girl a look. “Why would the school bring up my name?”

 

“We should probably talk. Courtney, if you'd excuse us.”

 

“Yes ma'am,” Courtney said glumly.

 

“If you wouldn't mind, mister Tiny,” Mrs. Barnes made her way back to the door. “I think the kitchen would be as good a place as any to have this conversation.”

 

“Sure thing,” Antonio said solemnly, wondering if anyone was in trouble. He followed the red head through the hall and into a large open kitchen that had a tall kitchen island with seats along one side.

 

“Please,” Mrs. Barnes pulled out a chair for the teenager. “Have a seat.”

 

Tony was obedient and sat down on the tall chair. It was comfortable enough, but he was not.

 

“Relax, sweetie,” Mrs. Barnes said as she sat down on the other end of the island. “I just want to have a chat with you; I'm not going to interrogate you.”

 

Tony flashed a smile. “That's good. Normally parents are ecstatic to meet me.”

 

“Of course they are. Tiny, king of Dunedin and star athlete. Trust me, I'm ecstatic too,” Mrs. Barnes said with much enthusiasm. “I never thought things would develop the way that they did.”

 

Tony was confused and since he always wore his emotions on his sleeve, it was quite evident.

 

“It wasn't an accident that Courtney went to Dunedin High.”

 

“I figured with your house being so close, you wouldn't have a choice.”

 

“We bought this house prior to her finishing middle school,” Mrs. Barnes said. “We were deliberate in choosing where she was going to go and you were one of the main reasons we picked Dunedin High.”

 

“Me?”

 

“Certainly. The staff is very high on you. We didn't think you would befriend Courtney, and no one was going to ask you, but they were certain that if the need would arise, you would have my daughter's back, so to speak.”

 

“So you let Courtney go to Dunedin because you thought I would protect her if she got bullied?”

 

“One of the reasons. I don't know if you are aware of her situation. She told me she let you know, but I rather make sure.”

 

Tony was unsure how to phrase what he wanted to say but was going to try his best to not offend. “You mean the fact that she is a girl on the inside but not exactly on the outside.”

 

“So she did tell you.”

 

“There were rumors going around school and I asked her about them. She told me the truth then.”

 

“Yes, the darn rumors. I can say darn, can't I? I heard you were religious and didn't like cussing.”

 

“Darn is okay,” Tony said with a smile.

 

“We weren't expecting rumors when we enrolled Courtney in the school. A part of us worried she would be figured out as she learned her way around being a girl to the outside world.”

 

“She had me fooled,” Tony said cautiously. “I don't think she is trying to fool anyone, I see her as a girl.”

 

Mrs. Barnes smiled. “That's because she is a girl, through and through, and this whole mess of her being in the wrong body threw everyone for a loop. I'm sure you can understand.”

 

“I'm sure her sisters are very happy to have another girl around.”

 

Mrs. Barnes cocked her head sideways. “What makes you think she has sisters?”

 

Tony shrugged. “I figured that she had sisters or a lot of girl cousins.”

 

“You think she wants to be a girl because that's all she is around?”

 

“It would make sense.”

 

Mrs. Barnes found the conversation amusing. “She's an only child. No girl cousins either.”

 

“Still with just you two, I can see it happening.”

 

“There's my husband too,” Mrs. Barnes said pointedly.

 

“Oh. I thought that maybe she didn't have many guy role models and went along with what she knew.”

 

“Not at all. I take it you put a lot of thought into my daughter's situation.”

 

“It's interesting. I guess I wanted to figure out why, not that it matters very much.”

 

“We might never know why. I'm her mom and know everything about her and even I don't know why. Maybe it was something when she was developing inside me; maybe it was something we did when she was growing up. It's not like we shoved her in a dress and gave her dolls when she was a baby. But she is who she is and that's enough to deal with on its own.”

 

“I'm glad she told me the truth about herself,” Tony said in order to guide the conversation to some middle ground. “If she would've told me the rumors were a lie, I would have believed her.”

 

“I'm glad she told you too or I would have had to end the friendship you two started. Not that I have anything against you or against you being friends, but she needs to be honest about her situation. I'm sure you can understand that it is difficult for her to tell a person the truth, her biggest fear is being rejected and the way things started from the very first day of school, it was a nightmare.”

 

“I can understand her being afraid. It must scary to show people who you really are when the world is telling you you're something else.”

 

“Well put,” Mrs. Barnes said. “It was very difficult and she was afraid of being found out and that was before that Henry kid threw a monkey wrench into the works. If it hadn't been for you, we might have gone to plan B.”

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