Wrestling Against Myself (20 page)

Courtney gave a nod. “Yes. I got you. You're my friend at school, so far. But I got a real good friend named Penelope.”

“Penelope?”

“She's a real person, not someone I made up.”

“I didn't say you did, you just don't hear that name very often.”

“She doesn't go by that name. She goes by Penny.”

“Okay. So you also have a best friend Penny. I don't know her.”

“She doesn't go to our school She lives near Atlanta.”

“So she's a peach,” Tony said. “A Georgia peach.”

“Does that make me a Florida orange?”
 

Tony chuckled. “Maybe a tangerine.”

Courtney rolled her eyes. “Anyway. Me and Penny met at summer camp and we write each other emails or chat online every day. She doesn't start school to next week though.”

“Lucky her, an extra week to sleep in.”

“So I got Penny and Tiny and I'm Courtney, so I think I got names ending in Y covered.”

“It seems that way. What letter are you going to tackle next? I suggest staying away from the letter Q, not too many people with names ending in Q.”

“You're too much. Can we talk about something serious for a little,” Courtney said as Tony pulled up next to the girl's driveway.

“Sure.”

“I know that you're a big Christian and that's important to you.”

Tony nodded. “
It's the most important thing in life.”

“What if people told you that you were wrong because of what you believed?”
“I get that sometimes, but not much.”

“What if they hated you for it? What if they thought you were a bad person because of it?”

“Hmm.” Tony sat back to think of his response. “I would like to think I would be the same person I am today. I don't see me changing because someone thought my beliefs were wrong.”

“Because you're a Christian and that's who you are, right? So you got to be you?”

“It's worked so far.”

“But what if it didn't work and people despised you? Would you change so people would like you?”

“No. I have to be true to who I am and what I believe. A long time ago I had that choice to make. I could either keep my beliefs to myself and hide them in order to be popular, or I could be true to my beliefs, be open about them, and not have to worry about living a lie.”

“Me too,” Courtney said as she stared at the boy. “So you would still believe and act the same way if everyone hated you and made fun of you?”

“I would like to think so. I made my choice to be true to God and not to the god of popularity. What happened? I have both God and popularity. I guess I came out ahead.”

“I don't know if I'm going to come out ahead.”

Tony could tell the girl was trying to get at something but he didn't know what.

“Can I ask you one more question?”

“Sure.”

“Would you stop being friends with someone if they did something that your beliefs said were wrong? I know Christians say to forgive, but sometimes they don't do that.”

Tony wondered if he was right and the girl had an abortion, which would explain things. He had to bite his tongue from blurting out the suggestion. He didn't want the girl to know what he suspected, especially if it were true. “You're right. A lot of Christians have trouble forgiving people for things, but I don't think they're right for doing so. If someone did something against my beliefs, I would still be their friend. I might tell them what my view is, if they asked, but I wouldn't treat them badly, that's for sure. Why do you ask?”

“Just a question. I see my mom looking out the window at us, I better go.”

“Okay. I guess I'll see you Monday.”

“See you Monday,” Courtney said and then got out of the car.

Tony watched the girl scamper to her house, feeling more confused than he did before.

“Okay,” he said to himself as he pulled away. “Either she had an abortion and she became a Muslim,” he said as he tried to make sense of the conversation. He figured that whatever it was, she would tell him when she was comfortable enough or the rumor going around school finally reached him. Either way, he didn't understand why Peter would take such an offense to it.

“Unless he's the father,” Tony thought with a shudder.

Tony drove home, put his belongings into his room and changed into a pair of swimming trunks. Though he didn't have an Olympic sized swimming pool, it was still long enough for him to get a few laps in. He swam in silence, opting not to turn on the outdoor stereo system as he pondered his new relationship. The girl had to have done something to garner the kind of attention she was receiving, but if he was honest with himself he had no clue as to what it was. He didn't want to come straight out and ask, that might frighten the girl away. But things didn't add up and it was unsettling to him. He was used to having everything figured out. Now he was thrown a curve ball, and wondered if it was something he could handle. He told the girl that he would remain friends with a person who did something contrary to his beliefs. He might have answered prematurely. What if she was dabbling in witchcraft or satanic rituals, Tony wondered. There were certain things he couldn't be involved with. He didn't want to scare her away, but felt guilty for not being entirely truthful. There were things he could forgive, even really bad things, but if a person continued doing those bad things, he couldn't be their friend. All of a sudden, a minor issue of a girl being teased at school had the possibility of being a major problem.

“Stop thinking about it,” Tony chided himself as he tread water in the deep end. He didn't have enough information to go on and everything was pure conjecture. He would handle things as they came along, and adjust his actions accordingly. He couldn't anticipate every scenario and he would drive himself nuts if he tried.

“Therefore,” Tony said out loud as a Bible verse came to his mind from Matthew 6. “Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

With that, Tony dove under water and saw how long he could hold his breath.

Monday finally rolled around and though Tony was sorry to see the weekend go, he was ready for another week of school. He took a light jog in the morning, only because he felt a little stiff from sleeping in a weird position, and then grabbed a long, hot shower.

The teen got into his car and drove to school; today was one of the few days when he wouldn't be early. He pulled into his spot and made his way to his locker. He was curious if the graffiti would already be removed from the locker and was pleased to see that not only was it scrubbed away, but the wall was repainted. Last year, when the seniors pulled their prank by spray painting on a few walls, he could tell that the writing was pressure washed away and if he looked closely enough he could make out what the writing said. No matter what Courtney did or was doing, she didn't need a constant reminder that people in the school had something against her.

The hallway was full as other students were also preparing for another week, but Courtney was nowhere to be found. He was glad she was comfortable around him, but hoped she could shed whatever phobia gripped her.

Tony opened his locker to be greeted by another note. He quickly unfolded it. “We need to talk,” it read, “out back, after lunch. Peter.”

Tony shrugged. At least it wasn't a veiled threat.

Tony was starting to get the hang of his final year of high school and the morning didn't lag as long as it did the first week. He made it through his classes, took notes when needed and did the little bits of busy work that teachers tended to give when they didn't have enough material to make it to the end of the class. He was discovering which teachers used the textbooks, which was hardly any, and which wanted to make a student write until their hands cramped. It was his last year though, and then it was off to college. His plan was to choose between whichever colleges offered him a full scholarship and would have him competing immediately. He knew he would be going to college out of state, which was unfortunate, but there wasn't a college wrestling program in the state of Florida.

Lunchtime rolled around and Tony sat at his regular table with a hamburger and fries. He hoped that when he made it to college he wouldn't eat the same lunch day after day. He heard some promising stories of college cafeterias and that some schools had fast food places right on campus; not that he figured he would go to many of those, but it was nice that the option existed.

Everyone else was already at the table, even Stephanie who had been making a conscious effort to be punctual. There were some side debates on how long it would last and some talk that the group should have a pool for when she finally gives up and reverted back to her past patterns.

“I hope you don't mind,” Tony said when everyone was settled in, “but I invited that girl Courtney to sit with us.”

“Doesn't sound like we have an option,” Shannon said, sounding a bit put off.

“Have we ever turned anyone away?” Carl asked in defense of his friend.

“We made Dexter leave last year,” Shannon replied.

“Yes we did,” Tony answered for himself. “Do you remember why?”

“Because all he did was mock us for our beliefs and curse up a storm.”

“He was trying to get one of us to get into a physical fight with him,” Tony explained. “It was some sort of perverse goal of his to push buttons and get a rise out of people.”

“Did he ever get into a fight?” Tracy asked as her eyes darted between Tony and Shannon.

Tony held his hands up. “Not with me.”

Shannon remained quiet on the subject.

“Anyway,” Tony changed the subject before things got out of hand. “I invited her to sit with us. I think it's sad that she sits alone at the punishment table.”

“Do you think she'll come,” Stephanie asked as she looked at herself in a small compact. “I haven't had any dealings with her yet.”

“She's very quiet and awkward,” Tracy offered. “I tried talking to her a few times but only got one word answers out of her.”

“Interesting,” Tony said. “She gets quite chatty. I think her being shy might have something to do with being around people. One on one she is okay.”

“I think she's an alien,” Dave offered.

“Or a cyborg,” Ted countered.

Carl rolled his eyes. “Why not an alien cyborg so you two can agree on something?”

“She is not an alien or a cyborg,” Tony said, wanting to put an end to the debate before it had a chance to begin. “She is a girl who is having trouble fitting in and we're letting her sit with us.”

“If she comes,” Tracy said.

Tony looked at the girl, scowled and then took a healthy bite of his hamburger.

“Did she say she was going to sit with us?” Tracy asked.

“Not exactly.”

“Then you don't know if she will.”

“But I invited her,” Tony said.

“Tiny gets what Tiny wants,” Shannon said sarcastically. “What girl could resist his charms?”

Tony looked over at the football player but didn't say a word.

“Sorry, Tiny. I'm being an.” Shannon swallowed the next word before it could even come out. “I'm not being real cool. I still got some pent up rage from the game on Friday.”

“We can see that,” Dave said. “You guys almost won.”