Wrestling Against Myself (22 page)

Tony was trying to maintain his composure. “Tell me whatever it is you want to tell me.”

“You disappoint me,” Peter said as he put his hand on Tony's shoulder. “I was hoping you would figure it out by yourself. That thing is a boy.”

“What!?!” Tony said in disbelief.

“You heard me, that thing you've been hanging out with and trying to protect, the thing that wears dresses and earrings and pretends to be a girl in front of everyone is a boy.”

“You're nuts,” Tony said in anger.

“It's true. You just missed the obvious signs.”

The bell warning the first lunch students to return to class sounded.

“We don't need that kind of freak at our school, Tiny,” Peter said as he walked away.

“Leave her alone.”

“It's not a her,” Peter called back. “Now that you know the truth, you know what God wants you to do.”

Tony was dumbfounded as Peter and his group left in a rush. He shook his head. “The lies people will spread because they don't like someone,” he said to himself. He knew what boys were like, after all, he was one. Courtney was certainly no boy.

Instead of dwelling on Peter's insanity, Tony gathered his wits about him and headed off to class. “Courtney's a boy,” he mumbled to himself and was a little put off that he was going to be late for English. “That's rich. Courtney's a boy and I'm the queen of England.”

Tony made it through another day of school, but his mind was never on the subject at hand. Ever since being told the ridiculous rumor that Courtney was a boy, there was no space in his consciousness to think about anything else. Though he didn't want to, he kept reviewing the facts to see if they lent any credence to what Peter told him. Tony searched for signs, something that he had missed, that would let him know for certain if Peter was lying.

'Guys do not decide to start being girls,' he thought during math class. 'It simply doesn't add up.'

He reviewed the things he knew were different between guys and girls. He knew about the physical differences in genitalia, thanks to a magazine his cousin left around when he was younger, but he never viewed such in the flesh. There were some things that were off limits. Even if he did suspect Courtney of being male, which he highly doubted, he wasn't about to ask that she show him proof.

'There are other physical differences,' he pondered. 'Hair, physique, secondary characteristics.'

Tony chided himself for dwelling on such a preposterous notion.  Boys weren't named Courtney. It wasn't a name like Shannon, where it could be applied either way. Besides, Courtney didn't look like she entered puberty yet.

"If she were a boy pretending to be a girl, she could easily fake having breasts,” he reasoned.
'The fact that she isn't faking that should prove she isn't trying to deceive people. If I was trying to convince people I were a girl,' Tony shuddered at the thought. 'I would at least stuff a bra.'

Tony shook his head as the final minutes of last period winded down. 'You need to stop,' he told himself. 'She's given you no reason to doubt who she said she is.'

Tony felt bad for the girl. He figured that she was being made fun of because she hadn't hit puberty yet. Sure, by the time girls hit high school, they normally started blossoming, but it wasn't unusual for some girls to take longer to get there than others, even in the early high school years.

The final bell rang. Tony knew he learned nothing; both in his classes or dispelling the rumor Peter was trying to spread. He closed his notebook, outside of the date in the upper right hand corner; the page for the day was blank. He would get notes from someone else, but that could wait a day or two.

Tony walked to his locker, he was hoping to catch Courtney there, but assumed that he wouldn't. She still made herself scarce, even though he offered her his protection. The hallway had its usual buzz about it at the end of the day as students scrambled to get their belongs and get to wherever it was they were going. It was too early for after school clubs to meet and, outside of football, no other sports teams were practicing. Pretty soon the school would be empty. Tony only hoped that he didn't have to wait that long for Courtney to be by his car.

The teenager made his way to the parking lot, going alongside the gym. There was a small crowd gathered on the embankment that overlooked the cars. It didn't appear as if anything was going on, just a group of about a half dozen students mulling about, but there was an air of anticipation that couldn't

be denied. As he approached the group, he noticed that it was Peter, his little gang, John Sharp and a gangly kid that he didn't know yet.

“John,” Tony called out as he stayed away from the group. “Come here.”

“Hey Tiny,” John said eagerly. “You ready?”

“Ready for what? What is going on?”

“I heard that you were going to kick some ass after school.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Peter told me that he told you about the it,” John said. “Are you going to pull it through the window or   are you going to pummel it in your car. You should pull it through the
window; blood is hard to get out of carpeting.”

“One, stop calling Courtney an it,” Tony said in a horsed whisper. “You know better than that. I expect better of you then to believe these stupid rumors. Two, you should know me better than that. Do you think I would actually beat her up?”

“We were hoping. Whatever you're going to do, it should be fun?”

“I'm not going to do anything. You're nuts.”

“Come on Tiny, you got to do something.”

“I am going to do something. I'm going home.” Tony was disgusted. He considered John a friend and was disappointed that a friend of his would have such a low opinion of him. He made his way through the small crowd, walked down the embankment and made his way to his car.

“Give him hell,” Peter called out.

Tony acted as if he didn't hear him. He made it to his Firebird; Courtney was already sitting in the passenger seat.

“You made it,” Tony said as he opened his door and slid into the bucket seat.

“Yeah,” Courtney said somberly.

“Sometimes I wonder if I'm going to have to wait, I know how you girls can be.”

“You mean like your friend Stephanie?”

Tony revved the engine and waited for the car to warm up before responding. “I suppose like Stephanie. But she isn't the first girl to ever keep a guy waiting.”

“It wouldn't be cool. I mean, you're nice enough to give me a ride home and all. I don't want to take advantage or anything.”

“Not at all.” Tony smiled. “Girls shouldn't have to walk home in this heat anyway, gets there hair frizzy or something.”

“I guess.” Courtney kept her eyes on the floorboard.

Tony put the car into gear and made his way towards the exit. “Something wrong? You don't seem like you usual self.”

“That guy that's been bothering me and his friends were all waiting when I came to your car.”

“Did he say anything to you?”

“No. But he makes me feel, I don't know, icky.”

“Icky?” Tony laughed. “I guess icky is a feeling. I wouldn't worry too much about him though.”

“Why? He seems to want to get me badly and I don't even know him.”

Tony made a note that Courtney didn't even know Peter, confirming his suspicion that the boy was spreading lies about someone whom he had a vendetta against. The only question that remained was why. “That's the way it is with bullies,” Tony said as he focused on the conversation at hand even though his mind was wondering. “They find a target and they stick with it for a little while. Obsessing over them. After a little while they grow bored and find someone else to pick on.”

“I hope he grows bored quick,” Courtney said, still refusing to look up.

“I'm sure he will. Anyway,” Tony wanted to change the subject and bring the girl out of her shell. “It was nice to see you eat lunch with us today.”

“It was okay,” Courtney said softly.

“Okay? It was more than okay, it was great.”

“I thought it would be different,” the girl admitted.

“Were you expecting linens and fine china?” Tony tried to make a joke of it.

“No.” Courtney allowed herself to smile. “I thought you guys talked about the Bible and God stuff.”

“Sometimes we do. Usually we talk about school. During wrestling season, me and Carl talk about our last opponent or who's coming up on our schedule. Pretty boring stuff to the others, but it's better than listening to Ted and Dave talk about star wars or star trek or whatever.”

“They seem nice.”

“They are nice. They just have their own idea of what is interesting and usually that's not the same thing as what everyone else finds interesting.”

“Like you talking about wrestling?”

“Touché.”

“Oh.” Courtney blushed. “I didn't mean anything by it.”

Tony laughed. “It's okay. I understand. We all have things that we each find interesting and before long we will find out more about what you find interesting.”

“I like reading,” Courtney admitted.

“Reading is good, kind of lonely though.”

“But books don't make fun of you.”

“They can if you don't know some of the words.”

Courtney decided to look up and show off her smile. “That's why we have dictionaries.”

“That's true. But I'm glad you're making more friends at school. Books can only talk to you, but they can't hear a word you're saying. I'm sure your friend Penelope is great, but Atlanta is a long way away.”

“You remembered,” Courtney said in surprise.

“I remembered what?”

“About Penny and Atlanta and all that. Most people don't remember things like that.”

“When a person is important, you do your best to remember what they say.”

Courtney turned a dark shade of red. “I'm not important.”

“Nonsense. All my friends are important to me.”

“Even Dave and Ted?”

“Don't tell them this, or they'll go on forever, but I pay attention to their conversations about nerd stuff. I know more about Star Trek and Narnia than I would like to admit.”

“So, we're friends?”

“I would like to think so.”

“Cool.”

“Cool indeed,” Tony said as he pulled into the girl’s driveway. He was getting to know the way to her house and the trip didn't take as long as the other few days.

“Here I am, home sweet home,” Courtney said as she opened her door.

“I hope that you decide to keep joining us for lunch, maybe even showing up earlier.”

“I think I will,” the girl said as she stood in her driveway and closed the door.

Tony leaned over and talked through the open passenger side window. “By the way, tomorrow morning we have a little prayer meeting before school. You're welcome to come join us.”

“Let's start with lunch,” Courtney said solemnly. “I'll see you tomorrow.”