Wishing on the Water (Water Series Book 1) (4 page)

Jax caught my swing and brought it to a slow halt. He walked around in front of me and crouched down on his knee to be eye level with me. He placed one hand on my knee to and gave me a comforting squeeze.

“
Candy cane where did that come from?” Jax spoke softly and looked concerned.

“
I just wanted you to know that I love you. You are my best friend, Jax. I don’t know how I would ever cope without you in my life.”

“
I’m not going anywhere, Candice. I won’t leave your side unless you don’t want me in your life.” Jax wiped the tear that slid down my cheek.

“
I have been thinking about it a lot and I need you to always be alright. I can’t lose you too. I get scared that I am putting too much on you and that I may drown you in my grief or that you may get shot trying to find out who killed Chase.”

“
Candy, sweetheart, ease your mind. You are the only reason I get up in the morning. Spending the last two weeks with you has kept me going. You are my family, and nothing is going to change that. I told you I am never leaving your side unless you don’t want or need me in your life.”

“
I think I told you I didn’t want you in my life when we were about nine, but you’re still here.” I stated with a sniffle and a hint of laughter.

“
That didn’t count I am sure you said it because I was being a dick.” Jax stated with a laugh as he stood back up. I stood up off the swing and reached into my pocket. I pulled out a silver necklace I had been carrying around for weeks and reached out and placed the necklace in his hand.

“
What is this Candy?”

“
It’s Saint Michael,” I whispered as Jax looked confused. “I was doing research for a story when I came across this story about how Saint Michael is the patron saint of police. He is supposed to protect you and keep you safe. There is even a policeman’s prayer on the back.”

Jax looked at the necklace and read the poem before looking back at me with concern evident on his face.

“
Candice what happened to Chase is not going to happen to me. You shouldn’t worry so much.”

I took the necklace back and unhooked the clasp. I reached up and fastened it behind his neck leaving the saint facing up on his chest.

“
I bought this right after Chase died. I knew if it could happen to him, it could happen to anyone. I know you may not want to wear this, but I need you to keep it on for me. Promise me you will never take it off.”

“
I promise Candy cane.” Jax murmured and pulled me into his arms. He was so tall that he could rest his chin on the top of my head and that was exactly what he did.

“
Jax do you think we will ever feel normal again?”

Jax merely squeezed me tighter and I closed my eyes to soak up with warmth. I listened to his heart beat in his chest as he let out a deep breath.

“
Candy, we are like this park. We have endured a beating, and we are now rusted and broken. We can either fix ourselves or let life demolish us. I think that as long as we have each other, time will help to repair us.”

“
Jax what would it take to save our park?” I asked, but the answer wouldn’t come as Jax’s phone rang. He let me go and I went back to swing as Jax walked off with his phone glued to his ear. He walked over to the big tree that our names were carved into.

I really missed being a kid. I didn’t have responsibilities, nor did I care about things that get under my skin now like taxes, deadlines, or death. I could be carefree.

Jax kept his back to me while he was on the phone which made me think that maybe there was a woman in his life I was holding him back from. I had been taking up all his time since Chase died, but I couldn’t bear to be left alone. Or the other option was that it was about the case, and I wasn’t privy to what was happening.

I dug my feet into the wet sand and wiggled my toes just like I did as a kid. The winds picked up as the disturbance was moving in behind the storm that had just left.

“
Candice,” Jax called my name and I pulled my feet out of the sand and stood up off the swing. I turned to look and he had this look on his face that was hard to describe. It was like a mixture of pain and anger, but guilt seemed to be present too.

“
What is it?” I ask as apprehension overwhelmed my body.

“
That was Christina, we need to go to your house,” Jax stated quietly and moved toward me. He looked at me as though I was going to shatter at any second.

“
Jax, you’re scaring me.” He really hadn’t said anything scary, but his tone said something was really wrong.

“
Candy cane, I am not trying to scare you. I just don’t know if you are ready for this.”

“
Ready for what?” I ask as the worst thoughts were running through my mind.

“
Someone broke into your house and…”

I cut Jax off and turned to head for his truck. Someone had invaded my home, my privacy, and what was left of my life with Chase. I wasn’t going to cry. The overwhelming anger coursing through my veins wouldn’t let me.
How dare someone do that?

I think it was safe to say I had moved into the anger stage in the five stages of grief; the thought of someone in my house had me ready to punch something.

I climbed into the truck and slammed the door to look out the window and see Jax holding my flip flops. Yea I was losing it, but I was too angry to care.

Upon arrival at my house the anger had dwindled into shock as I saw people in uniform moving in and out in what seemed to be synchronized movements. Men were wearing gloves and carrying bags while others dusted my door that looked like it had been broken off its frame. They looked as though they had done this a million times and it was nothing new.

Jax got out of the truck and walked around and opened the door for me. As soon as I stepped out of the truck I felt out of place; I didn’t belong here.

Christina was standing on the side of my gray brick house talking to a man in a suit. I had seen him at Chase’s funeral, but all the faces and names had since blurred into each other. Christina was writing down notes as the man talked. I had never seen her at work before, she was like an entirely different person. She looked so serious and determined.

Jax took my hand as I stood outside his truck. Watching as people walked back and forth and all the flashing lights from the police cars made this like something out of the movies, or a twist that I would put in a book. This stuff didn’t happen in real life.

Jax gave my hand a squeeze and I walked with him over toward Christina. As soon as she saw me she turned and her seriousness fell from her face. I watched as an almost forced sympathetic look crossed her face as she headed right for me. She enveloped me in her arms and held me tight.

“
Are you alright? Where have you been?” Christina asked and I merely nodded my head in Jax’s direction. Then she looked at his hand that was still holding mine. “Jax, so nice of you to drive her over, but I have it from here,” Christina mumbled.

“
Candy stays with me,” Jax declared. There must have been some kind of pissing contest between the two of them that I was not aware of because they glared at each other as if each was bitter with the other.

“
What happened?” I asked trying to pull their focus away from each other and get this over with. I didn’t want to stand here any longer than I had to, and their obvious distaste for each other was keeping me rooted to this spot watching like an onlooker.

“
Someone broke in the front and back door,” Christina answered

“
That seems a bit excessive to break both doors doesn’t it?” I asked with my voice barely above a whisper. The whole thing just didn’t seem to compute. “What is missing?”

“
We will have you do an inventory of anything that is missing after we are done processing the scene.” Christina said a little too loudly, and then leaned in and whispered to both Jax and I. “It doesn’t look like anything is missing, but the house is trashed. It’s FUBAR.”

“
I don’t want to be here,” I muttered out loud without even thinking. Now that I had their attention though maybe I could leave.

“
Do you want to go in and see the damage? Jax or I can take you in there.”

“
Do I have to go in there? Level with me, do I want to go inside?” I asked and Christina and Jax shared a look. They were having that silent we-wear-the-same-badge talk. It was annoying before when Chase and Jax did it, but it was worse now.

“
Candy, you don’t want to go in there. Your house has been trashed. Everything was pulled out or tossed from your kitchen items to your televisions and photo albums. Nothing was left untouched.”

I dropped Jax’s hand and walked toward the door. I didn’t want to go inside, but some part of me felt like I needed to. I walked up the three steps of the porch and saw the fractured doorframe to the house.

I walked inside to see glass shattered everywhere. The television had been busted even the gas logs had holes in them. My photos from the albums on my shelf were torn into pieces and lying on the floor. I thought I was going to be sick.

I looked to the right and noticed one small shadow box still hung on the wall right beside the front window. It was this little box frame I had bought. Inside it held the first rose petal to fall from the first set of roses Chase ever bought me, and a four leaf clover that Jax had given me after we ventured into the woods to find a new place to wish. Both had been freeze dried and mounted inside the little box.

This was all I had left of Chase, and I’s relationship. He was gone and so were his clothes, his pictures, and even his smell. Almost as though he never existed. I couldn’t breathe as I hugged the shadow box to me.

“
Candice, I am going to need you to step outside and talk to me while they finish clearing the scene.”

That was all I needed to hear to walk out. It didn’t have that comforting feeling most houses have after Chase had died and now it was as if I was in a stranger’s house. I wanted to sell the house and start over in an apartment or brownstone closer to downtown, but the Chaplain had drilled in the “don’t do anything for one year speech.”

“
Candy, you okay?” Jax asked as he reached for my arm to lead me out of the house.

“
I am fine. I want to go back to your house if that is okay.”

“
Candice, are you going to be at Jax’s later?” Christina asked in a monotone whisper. Her eyes looked inquisitive as if she was questioning something but her lip quivered just enough to notice.

“
I will be there, why?”

“
I wanted to see if I could come by. I haven’t seen you in two weeks and I really want to talk to you. I want to know that you are doing alright. You seemed to have cut everyone off except Jax, and while I am grateful you have him I still want you to be able to talk to me if you need it.” Christina murmured and looked at Jax as if having that silent conversation again.

“
Yea I will be there, you can come by anytime if it is alright with Jax. I do miss our girl talk.”