Unconditional Love (21 page)

Lark grabbed my arm and spun me around and grabbed onto both my arms as he began walking me backwards. My heart was pounding and the look in his eyes was scaring me.

“I’ll have you know I’ve never fucked anyone else on my bike. Ever. I’ve never even had a girl in my truck before you.”

“Lark, let go of me. You’re scaring me.”

“When are you going to see that you’re different for me? I know you’re not some fucking whore in a club. You’re my everything and I don’t know what I’m supposed to do to prove that to you.”

I felt the tears building in my eyes and I hated that I was acting so weak in front of him.

“I’m not asking you to prove anything. I’m sorry, I just…” My voice trailed off and I let out a sob. He looked down at his hands gripping my arms and he let go.

He took a few steps back and ran his hand through his hair. He shook his head and the look in his eyes about dropped me to the floor. He had tears in his eyes.

“You’re my whole world, and for you to think I’d…I never want to hurt you.”

He turned around and took a few steps away from me. He turned back and said, “I’m sorry I made you do something that made you feel uncomfortable. I’ve missed you so much and when I’m around you I can’t seem to get enough of you.”

I tried to say something, but when I saw him run his hands down his face and wipe his eyes it felt like someone kicked me in the stomach.

“I’m tired, Azurdee. I think I need to take a shower and get some sleep.”

He turned and walked down the hall towards his bedroom.

I just stood there.
What just happened?
I walked over to the sofa and sat down. I closed my eyes and pictured us on the bike. I was shocked at myself for liking what we just did. The fact that someone saw us turned me on even more and I was trying to come to grips with that.

I took my fear out on Lark. It was easier to make it feel like it was his fault than to admit my own fears.

I looked toward his room. I stood up and took a deep breath. I knew what I had to do.

I let the hot water run over my face as I tried to understand what just happened. How could she think I’d treat her like all those other girls? I’m doing everything I possibly can to show her how much she means to me.
What in the fuck happened?
She’d seemed to like what we were doing. I knew it turned her on, but then something switched in her.

I’m no good for her. I made her feel dirty and used.

Maybe she was pushing me away because she found out I’m still active duty?
Fuck!

As soon as we landed, I jumped on my bike and headed straight to her. I wasn’t even thinking I was still in my uniform.
I warned her…I told her I wasn’t any good for her.

I closed my eyes and put my hands against the back of the shower. I jumped when I felt her hands touch me. The feeling that zipped through my body when she touched me caused goose bumps to come up all over my body. I turned around and she was standing there naked.

She is so damn beautiful. I don’t deserve her.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know why I blamed you for my own insecurities. Lark, I really enjoyed what we did…a lot. More than I want to admit.”

I looked at her, confused.

She began chewing on her bottom lip. I reached up and pulled it out from her teeth.

“Talk to me Azurdee, because I’m confused as hell. I’ve tried so hard to show you…”

She put her finger up to my lips to stop me from talking.

“I’ve always been the good girl. The girl who waited to find the perfect guy to give her virginity to. The girl who was always making sure her friends got home from parties, who sat there and listened to them all talk about sex and how amazing it was. When I met you for the first time and you smiled at me, you turned something on deep inside of me. I love who I am with you, Lark, but it…it scares me that I crave your touch as much as I do. I’d never been so turned on as I was earlier. Knowing that someone was watching us…it thrilled me and I was…I was…”

“Tell me,” I whispered.

“When it hit me what we had done, I panicked and I guess I let my imagination run wild when I said those things to you. You’ve never treated me like that. I swear to you. You’ve made me feel so wonderful. I feel cherished when you make love to me. I feel wanted when you look at me with lust in your eyes.”

She looked down and began crying. I pulled her to me and wanted more than anything to tell her how much I loved her.

I held her for a few minutes before she looked up at me and said, “It was really hot.”

I smiled and said, “Hottest damn thing I’ve ever done.”

She grinned and said, “Me too.”

I laughed and picked her up as she wrapped her legs around me.

“I can’t get enough of you,
mi amor
. I rushed to your house as soon as we landed. I never wanted you to find out that I was still in the Marines.”

She looked into my eyes and tilted her head. “Can I ask why you tell everyone you’re not in the Marines?”

My heart slammed in my chest. “I um…I kind of work undercover. I can’t really talk about it.”

She nodded her head and said, “Good enough for me. I promise I won’t say anything to anyone.”

I pushed her against the wall and kissed her. “I love you so much,” she whispered as I buried my face in her neck and closed my eyes.

Guarda mi corazón.

I wanted so badly to tell her I loved her, but I wasn’t sure I was ever going to be able to tell her that.

I gently set her down and she smiled and picked up the soap and washcloth and began washing me off.

The next thing I remembered I was lying down and pulling her next to me as I fell asleep.

Right before I drifted off to sleep she whispered,

“I’ll love you unconditionally, Lark Williams. Forever.”

When I saw the house come into view I took a deep breath. Tristan had already called to tell me our mother was all over Ryn from the first moment she laid eyes on her.

“Lark? Are you okay?” Azurdee asked. I looked at her and smiled. “I am. I’m just worried my mother is going to attack you and start talking babies and shit. I don’t want you to stress about what she says to you, okay?”

She threw her head back and laughed. “Please. Wait until you meet
my
parents.”

I swallowed hard just thinking about meeting her father. I gripped the steering wheel harder. When she placed her hand on my arm I instantly relaxed.

“It’ll be fine. Please don’t worry.”

I nodded and tried to smile.

“Jesus, that house is huge!” Azurdee said.

And there was my mother. Right on cue. Tristan and Ryn were walking up behind her as my mother jumped up and down clapping her hands. I wanted to just keep driving and leave.

I stopped a few feet back and put the truck in park and turned and looked at Azurdee. She was smiling as she watched my mother.

“Azurdee?”

She tilted her head as she looked at me. “I um…I haven’t brought anyone here before, besides Nikki. I um…well I…”

She placed her hand on the side of my face and smiled the most beautiful smile. “Stop. It’s okay and I just love that you brought me here to meet your parents. Lark, I’m not trying to push you into anything you’re not ready for. Please know that.”

I closed my eyes and opened them again. The look in her eyes would have dropped me to my knees if I had been standing up. “I’m scared, Azurdee. I’m so fucking scared of the feelings that I have for you.”

Her lips parted open and she looked like she wanted to say something but she bit down on her lower lip and then said, “It’s a shame your mother is standing there waiting for us, because I really want to crawl onto your lap and make love to you.”

I looked back at my mother and sighed. “Ah fuck. This is going to be a long two weeks.”

I jumped out of the truck and waved to my screaming mother. “Michael! Oh don’t make me wait another second!”

I smiled and walked up to the passenger side of my truck. I opened the door and held my hand out and whispered, “Get ready for the monster.”

She punched me in the stomach and said, “Stop that!”

Azurdee turned and began walking toward my mother. “Oh. My. God! You are beautiful.” She placed her hands on Azurdee’s face and looked her up and down. “Oh, Michael. Where did you find such a beautiful young lady?”

Azurdee’s cheeks flushed and I beamed with pride. I glanced up at Tristan, who was laughing. I walked up to Ryn and gave her a kiss on the cheek and said hello. I reached for Tristan’s hand to shake it. He grabbed me and pulled me into a hug and whispered, “Thank fuck you showed up. Ryn was about to kill Mom!”

I laughed and gave him a push.

Before I knew it, my mother had hooked her arm through Azurdee’s and was walking into the house. “Tonight there’s a dance in town. I’ll introduce you to all our friends. You do two-step, right darling?”

Azurdee nodded her head and said, “Yes ma’am, I do.”

“Oh good! My Michael loves to dance.”

Azurdee looked over her shoulder and winked at me as she said, “Yes ma’am, he does.”

“If you love that girl you will get her away from Mom, fast,” Tristan said as he slapped me on the back and put his arm around Ryn’s waist. Then he made his way into the house behind my mother and Azurdee.

I stood there and watched as Azurdee laughed at everything my mother said. She immediately fit in, and I had no doubt my mother would love her.

The most overwhelming feeling moved through my body as I smiled and shook my head.

I loved her. I loved Azurdee Emerson more than the air I breathed.

I hadn’t had this much fun or laughed this much in a long time. I loved Lark’s parents already. Lark had made Joyce and Peter out to be terrible, but they were kindhearted and loved their two sons more than anything.

I sat at the wood table and tried to listen to Joyce and her best friend Terry talk about teaching me how to make a proper cobbler. Once Joyce found out I loved to cook and was opening my own restaurant, she was in heaven. I had made everyone French toast for dinner after Lark insisted it was the best he’d ever had.

I had been in the kitchen talking to Joyce when Lark walked in dressed in Wranglers and cowboy boots. When I looked down and saw the cowboy hat in his hands, I was almost positive I moaned. He smiled and winked at me as he made his way outside. Joyce leaned over and whispered, “I’m going to guess this is the first time you’ve seen my boy in his natural element.”

I shook my head. I’d seen Lark in jeans and boots before but something about how he looked right now was causing my breathing to pick up and my body to ache for his touch.

“I can’t believe he’s mine,” I whispered. I slammed my hand over my mouth and looked at Joyce. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to say that out loud.”

She began laughing and said, “Azurdee, I’ve never seen my son look at another woman like he looks at you.”

I dropped my hand and said, “What about Nikki?”

Her smile faded briefly before she smiled sweetly at me and said, “You know about Nikki?”

I nodded and said, “Yes.”

“He loved her, Azurdee. He was devastated by her death, but the way he looks at you…” she smiled bigger and looked into my eyes. “I’ve never seen him so in love with someone in my life.”