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but thought he was prophesying something evil. Now I understand and I thank him for his good prophecy. To the glory of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, I wish to state that I am a Christian and share in their baptism, their spirit and their holy meals. I shall be subjected to the same punishment as they. And further, I wish to tell you, respected fathers, in case you do not yet know it, that Nero himself is the greatest enemy of mankind. You too are enemies of mankind as long as you endure his insane tyranny.� Nero whispered to the Consuls, who immediately declared the meeting secret, so that Rome should not be subjected to the shame of a member of the Senate being exposed by his hatred of mankind as a spokesman for a frightening superstition. My father had his own way. Considering a vote unnecessary, the Consul declared that the Senate had decided to strip Marcus Mezentius Manilianus of his broad purple band and his red laced boots. In front of the assembled Senate, two senators appointed by the Consuls removed toga and tunic from my father, his red boots were drawn from his feet and his ivory stool was smashed to pieces. After this had taken place in complete silence, suddenly Senator Pudens Publicola rose to his feet and in a trembling voice announced that he too was a Christian. But his elderly friends grabbed him and forcibly pulled him down into his place, covering his mouth with their hands as they shouted and laughed together to drown his words. Nero said that enough disgrace had already fallen on the Senate, that the meeting was now closed, and no notice need be taken of an old man�s gabbling. Pudens was a Valerian and a Publicolian. My father was only an insignificant Manilianus by adoption. Tigellinus now called in the centurion who was on guard in the Curia arcade, told him to take ten Praetorians and remove my father to the nearest place of execution outside the city walls, avoiding attracting attention at all costs. To be just, he should have been taken to the circus to be executed in the same way as the other Christians, but to avoid scandal, it was better to have him taken outside the city walls in secret. There he would be decapitated with a sword. Naturally the centurion and his men were furious, for they were afraid they would be too late for the show in the circus. As my
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father was now quite naked, they snatched a cape from a slave who had been standing staring at the senators leaving the Curia, and flung it over him. The slave began running after my father, whimpering and trying to retrieve his only piece of clothing. The wives of the senators were sitting waiting in their husbands� sedans. Because of the long journey they had to make, the idea was that the procession, with senators and matrons separated, would form just outside the circus, to which the image of the gods of Rome had already been borne on their cushions. Tullia became impatient when nothing was heard of my father and stepped Out of her sedan to go and find him. She had thought that he had behaved oddly in other ways the night before. When Tullia asked after her husband, not one of the senators dared answer her, for that part of the meeting had been declared secret and they had sworn an oath on it. The confusion was increased when Pudens loudly demanded to be taken home since he did not wish to witness the infamous circus show. Several senators who were secretly in sympathy with the Christians and hated Nero and respected my father�s manly behavior, although they thought him a little mad, were encouraged to follow Pudens� example and stay away from the procession. As Tuffia scuttled back and forth outside the Curia like an agitated hen, loudly complaining about my father�s absentmindedness and dilatoriness, she caught sight of a plaintive slave and an old man with a slave cape over his shoulders being led away by some Praetorians. When she got nearer, she recognized my father and, utterly dumbfounded, stopped with her arms outstretched, barring their way. �What on earth are you up to again, Marcus?� she asked. �Whatever is all this about? I�m not forcing you to go to the circus if you find it so distasteful. There are others here who are not going. Come, let�s go home quietly if you like. I won�t even quarrel with you.� The centurion, in his haste, struck her with his stave and told her to be off. At first Tullia could not believe her ears, but then she was so angry she rushed at him in order to scratch the eyes out of his stupid head, at the same time crying Out that he would immediately be clapped in irons for daring to touch the wife of a senator.
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And so the scandal became public. Several women got out of their sedans, ignoring their husbands� protests, and hurried to Tullia�s assistance. When this well-dressed group of women surrounded the Praetorians, all loudly asking what had happened and what it was all about, my father was troubled by the attention they were attracting and turned to speak to Tullia. �I am no longer a senator,� he said. �I am going with the centurion of my own free will. Remember your rank and don�t shriek like a fishwife. As far as I am concerned, you can go alone to the circus. I don�t think there�s anything to stop you.� �Hercules save me,� said Tullia, bursting into tears, �no one has ever called me a fishwife before. If you�re so offended by what I said about your Christians last night, then you might have said so straight out instead of sulking all evening. There�s nothing worse than a man who won�t speak out, but just remains as dumb as an ox for days and days.� Several senators� wives laughingly agreed in an attempt to smooth things over. �That�s right, Manilianus,� they said. �You needn�t throw away your ivory stool just because of a little squabble. Stop this foolishness now and forgive Tullia if she�s hurt you in some way. You are man and wife, after all, and you�ve grown gray respectably together over the years.� Tullia was deeply offended and snatched her festive veil from her head. �Look for yourselves, you old gossips,� she cried, �and see if I�ve got as much as one single gray hair in my head. And it�s not dyed either, although I do use Arabian rinses, of course, to bring out the natural color of my hair. All that nonsense about dyeing it is just envy and slander.� �This is a solemn moment in my life,� my father said to the centurion, �perhaps the most solemn ever. I cannot endure this female chatter a moment longer. Take me away from this dreadful noise as you have been ordered to.� But the women were still all around them and the centurion did not dare order his men to make a way for them by force for he had already been reprimanded for simply touching Tullia. Besides, he was not quite sure what was happening. When Tigellinus noticed the crowd gathering and the noise
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increasing, he pushed his way through to my father, his face gray with anger, and he struck Tullia in the chest with his fist. �Get to Orcus, you damned bitch,� he said. �You�re no senator�s wife any longer and you�re not protected by rank. If you don�t keep your mouth shut at once, I�ll have you arrested for disturbing the peace and insulting the Senate.� Tullia turned deathly pale when she saw that he was serious, but her sudden fear did not affect her pride. �Servant of the devil,� she swore, in her haste remembering only the ways of speech of my father�s friends. �Stick to haggling over horses and fornicating with pretty boys. You�re overstepping your authority when you strike a Roman woman in front of the Curia. Only the City Prefect has the right to arrest me. Your own bad behavior will arouse more anger than my polite request to know what is going on and where my husband is going with his guard of honor. I�ll appeal to the Emperor.� Nero had already reprimanded Tigellinus for mismanaging the arrest of the Christians and Tigellinus was annoyed about this. So he pointed to the Curia. �Nero is still there,� he sneered. �Hurry up and appeal to him. He knows what�s going on.� �Don�t throw your life away just for my sake, my dear Tullia,� my father warned her. �And don�t spoil the last moments of my life. Forgive me if I have hurt you, and forgive me for not being the husband you wished for. You have always been a good wife to me, although we�ve disagreed on so many things.� Tullia was so happy that she completely forgot Tigellinus and flung her arms around my father. �Did you really say �my dear Tullia�?� she cried. �Wait just a moment and I�ll soon be back.� Smiling tearfully, she went across to Nero, who was looking discomfited, and greeted him respectfully. �Be so gracious as to explain to me,� she said, �what kind of unfortunate misunderstanding this is. Everything can be remedied with good will on both sides.� �Your husband has deeply offended me,� said Nero, �but that I can, of course, forgive him. Unfortunately he has also publicly declared in front of the Senate that he is a Christian. The Senate has removed from him his rank and office and condemned him to
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be executed by the sword as a public enemy. Be so good as to keep silent, for we wish to avoid public scandal. I have nothing against you. You may retain your property, but your husband�s property must be confiscated by the State because of his crime.� Tullia refused to believe her ears. �Well, these are fine times!� she cried. �Is there no other charge against my husband except that in his soft headedness he�s gone and become a Christian?� �It is the same punishment for all Christians, because of their ill-deeds,� Nero said impatiently. �Go away now, and don�t bother me any more, for you can see I am in a hurry. My duty to the State demands that I lead the procession to the circus in my capacity as first citizen.� Then Tullia tossed her head proudly, without a thought for the slack skin around her chin. �I have a very varied life behind me,� she cried, �and I have not always behaved as well as one might expect a woman of my position to do. But I am a Roman woman and I shall go with my husband, wherever he goes. Where Gaius is, there is also Gaia. I, too, am a Christian and now acknowledge it publicly.� This was not true. On the contrary, she had constantly poisoned my father�s life with her perpetual nagging and her contempt for his Christian friends. But now she turned to face the inquisitive crowd. �Hear me,� she cried out aloud, �you, the Senate and the people of Rome. I, Tullia Manilia, formerly Valeria, formerly Sulia, am a Christian. Long live Christ of Nazareth and his kingdom.� To make doubly sure, she then cried �Hallelujah,� for she had heard the Jews repeat that word at their meetings at my father�s house during their arguments with other Christians about the different ways. Fortunately her voice did not carry very far and Tigellinus covered her mouth with his hand. When the senators� wives noticed how angry Nero had become, they hurriedly went back to their sedans, simmering with curiosity, to extract the truth of what had happened in the Senate from their husbands at the first opportunity. Nero only just managed to maintain his dignity. �You shall have your own way then, insane woman,� he said, �as long as you keep your mouth shut. It would be just if I
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sent you to the circus to be punished with the others, but you are much too ugly and wrinkled to act as Dirce. So, like your husband, you may feel the sword, but for that you have the esteem of your forefathers to thank, not me.� Tullia had made the scandal so public that with the best will in the world, Nero would not have dared send a dismissed senator�s spouse to the wild animals in front of the people. As the Praetorians led Tullia back through the crowd to my father, Nero vented his rage on Tigellinus and ordered him to have my father�s household arrested and to have every one of them who admitted to being a Christian taken straight to the circus. At the same time the magistrates� men were to seal the house and confiscate all papers connected with my father�s and Tullia�s fortunes. �And don�t you touch it,� Nero said warningly. �I consider myself to be their heir, as you force me into police duties by neglecting yours.� The only thing that consoled him in his rage was the thought of my father�s and Tullia�s huge wealth. Some anxious Christians still stood outside the Curia, hoping to the last that the authority of the Senate would save the condemned Christians from the horror of the circus. Among them was a youth who wore a narrow red band and who had not hurried to the circus to ensure himself a place among the always overcrowded seats of the knights. When the Praetorians, with the centurion in the lead, escorted my father and Tullia to the nearest execution place, he followed them, together with several other Christians. The Praetorians discussed how they could complete their task in the shortest possible time and be in time for the show, and they decided to head for the Ostian gate and implement the execution by the burial monument. This was not really an official place of execution, but it was at least outside the walls. �If it isn�t a place of execution, then we�ll make it into one now,� they joked. �Then the lady won�t have to walk so far in her gold sandals.� Tullia snapped back that she could walk as far as her husband without any difficulty and no one could prevent her from doing so. As evidence of her strength, she supported my father, who,
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weighed down by his years, unused to physical exertion and weary from a whole night�s drinking, soon began to waver. Yet he had been neither drunk nor confused when he had risen to speak in the Senate, but had been carefully prepared for the event. This was revealed at the search of his house. Obviously he had for several weeks been putting his financial affairs in order and he had spent his last night burning all his account books and the list of his freedmen together with his correspondence with them. My father had always kept quiet about his affairs and on the whole had not regarded his freedman�s property as his own, although naturally, so that they should not be offended, he had accepted the gifts they sent him. Not until long afterwards did I learn that he had sent his loyal freedmen huge sums of money in cash so that the assets of his estate should not be revealed by any money orders. The magistrates had great trouble settling he estate, and in the end Nero received nothing of value except Tullia�s large country property which they had been forced to own in Italy for the sake of his office as senator, and then of course the house in Viminalis with its oh jets d�art, gold, silver and glass. The most aggravating thing for the magistrates was that because of Nero�s hasty command, the Praetorians arrested everyone in the household who admitted to being Christian so that they would not disgrace my father. Among them were the Procurator and both scribes, whose deaths Nero bitterly regretted afterwards. In all, thirty people were taken to the circus from my father�s house. From my point of view, the worst thing was that my son Jucundus and the aged Barbus were among those captured. After his burns from the fire, Jucundus was so crippled that he could move only with great effort on crutches, so he was taken to the circus in a sedan with Tullia�s aged nurse. This woman was certainly not a good person and she had a foul mouth, but she had willingly admitted to being a Christian when she heard that Tullia had done the same. None of them realized why they had been ordered to the circus until they found themselves imprisoned in the stables. On the way there, they had still believed that Nero wished the Christians to witness the punishment of the instigators of the fire of Rome.