The Mind Connection: How the Thoughts You Choose Affect Your Mood, Behavior, and Decisions (3 page)

Transformation means a thorough change, and that is exactly what Jesus offers us through His death and resurrection. He
offers us a new way of living, one filled with good things in which we are not conformed to the world and its superficial, external customs. A new way of thinking and a new attitude will always precede this new way of living. Right thinking and right attitudes are road maps that allow us to reach our destination. Romans 12:2 says:

In this one Scripture we find the answer to how we can have an enjoyable life that is filled with good things. A good life is not one that is entirely trouble free, but it is one that can always be enjoyed because we trust God and have thoughts filled with hope and a good attitude. Romans 12:2 is a very important verse of Scripture for us to understand. The simplicity of its message is that God has a good, acceptable, and perfect plan for you and me, and the way we can experience that is not to think like the world thinks, but to be changed entirely by learning to renew our mind and think the way God thinks. If you want to have what God wants you to have, learn to think like God thinks.

Mind, mouth, moods, attitudes, and behavior are definitely all connected. Pay particular attention to the thoughts going through your mind, because they will energize the rest of what
you do. You can jump-start your day by thinking good things on purpose as one of your first acts of the day. Thinking them and speaking them is the combination I recommend. This exercise only takes a few minutes, but it will be valuable to you all day. You may meditate on and confess things like this:

A negative mind and mouth will produce negative moods, attitudes, and, in all probability, a miserable day. But the positive approach of setting your mind in an uplifting direction cannot have anything other than a good effect on you and your entire day.

This doesn’t mean that you won’t have to deal with any unpleasantness throughout the day—and when you do, you may need to make even more choices about how you will think in those situations—but the good news is that you can choose how you will think, the words you want to speak, and the attitude you will have toward life. Your attitude belongs to you, and nobody can force you to have a bad one if you don’t want to. Anyone who does have a bad attitude hurts themselves more
than anyone, and they hinder any positive progress in their life. A bad attitude and a good life simply don’t mix!

• Your mind, mouth, moods, and attitudes are all intricately connected.

• No matter what you experience, you are responsible for your own life.

• A transformed mind leads to transformed moods, attitudes, and behaviors.

• Thinking godly thoughts and speaking them each morning is an exercise that can change your entire day.

There is no doubt that thinking positively is much easier when life is not difficult, but it is self-defeating to think that it is impossible. Joy in adversity is a powerful principle that helps us live above the clouds. The sun is always shining somewhere above the storm clouds of life, and if we can see it by faith, we won’t cave in to discouraged and depressed thinking.

In Robert Schuller’s book
Tough Times Never Last, But Tough People Do
, he tells the following story:

It is more difficult to think and speak positively during the “winters” of our life, but it is helpful to remember that spring always follows winter. A favorite saying in our family is “This too shall pass.” Song of Solomon 2:11–12 encourages us to look for springtime during winter when it says: “For, behold, the winter is past; the rain is over and gone. The flowers appear on the earth; the time of the singing [of birds] has come, and the voice of the turtledove is heard in our land.”

Winter is merely a time when things are not going well. Perhaps you are having a financial difficulty, relationship problems, or illness. It is not possible to live life and not have winter come around on a regular basis, but it is possible to look for spring in the middle of it. It is very helpful during difficult times to remember that they won’t last forever.

Have you ever noticed that being upset or downtrodden about problems never changes them? Sometimes we don’t take time to look at the fruit of our actions, but if we did, surely we would see that worry is useless. We can learn to enjoy the journey of life, even when it takes us in a different direction than we had planned.

A bad attitude is like a flat tire. If you don’t change it, you won’t go anywhere. Being worried and upset is like sitting in a rocking chair all day and rocking back and forth. It keeps you busy and eventually wears you out, but it gets you nowhere. Mary Engelbreit said, “If you don’t like something, change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.”
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I suggest that if your circumstances don’t make you happy, at least let your thoughts do it for you.

It is very important for each of us to learn how to have the victory in the midst of our problems. God’s Word teaches us that we are more than conquerors in the midst of our trials and tribulations (Romans 8:37). When I am in the midst of difficulty, I often turn to Romans 8:35–39, and I remind myself that no matter how difficult life is, God loves me. I try to remember that at times, I may appear as a sheep being led to slaughter, but in the midst of these things, I am more than a conqueror. To me, this simply means that we can always be assured of victory eventually. We may go through very difficult things, but following the principles God has set out for us in His Word will bring us through safely every time.

During the writing of the first few chapters of this book, I have been experiencing a physical ailment that is making me very uncomfortable. It is one of those “mystery illnesses.” You know, the ones the doctor can’t explain and no medicine seems to alleviate. I hate those the worst of all, don’t you? I can begin to wonder if I am just imagining the symptoms, but the discomfort tells
me that I am not. While trying to encourage you about staying positive during difficulty, I went through two days in which I felt as if my mind had been kidnapped. I couldn’t seem to focus on much of anything except how I felt, and an inability to focus is not helpful when writing a book.

What did I do? I had to do what I am recommending to you. I kept pressing in and making an effort in God to bring my mind back to what I know to be true in my heart. The Bible teaches us to cast down wrong thoughts (see 2 Corinthians 10:5 KJV), but there are days when I
feel
like I spend the entire day casting them down and they keep coming back. You will experience days like this, and I urge you not to give up on those days and believe you will never be able to think right. Trust me, you are not the only one who has those kinds of days. Just keep saying, “This is an attack, and it will pass.” You see, the mind is the battlefield on which we fight against the lies of Satan. Whatever he says is the opposite of what God’s Word says, or he may even use Scripture out of context.

When Jesus was enduring His testing and temptation in the wilderness before His public ministry began, the devil said to Him, “If You are the Son of God, throw Yourself down; for it is written, He will give His angels charge over you, and they will bear you up on their hands, lest you strike your foot against a stone” (Matthew 4:6). Satan quoted a Scripture, but used it in a wrong way. Jesus immediately responded, “On the other hand, it is written also, You shall not tempt, test thoroughly, or try exceedingly the Lord your God” (Matthew 4:7). No one can win the battle in their mind unless they know God’s Word. The Word of God is Truth, and we can believe that above all else.

I am certain that if I had listened to and followed my thoughts during my two-day struggle, I would have had no authority
to write a book on the mind. However, I know from studying Scripture that Satan attacks anytime we try to go forward or do anything good, and that we must stand our ground. When we do, he will eventually go away and wait until a more favorable and opportune time (see Luke 4:13). The apostle Paul said it well when he said, “A wide door of opportunity for effectual [service] has opened to me [there, a great and promising one], and [there are] many adversaries” (see 1 Corinthians 16:9). Anyone who wishes to go through life without any opposition is in for huge disappointment.

Opposition is actually a benefit to us, because it forces us to choose to either use our faith and stand firm in Christ or give up. Each time we make the right choice, it is a little more difficult for the devil to deceive us the next time. He will never stop trying, but we do get better and better at recognizing his attacks and standing against them.

God has equipped and anointed us to do hard things. He allows us to go through difficulty to bring glory to Him. He shows Himself strong through us. He told Paul that His strength is made perfect in our weakness (see 2 Corinthians 12:9). We may think we can’t make it through difficulty, but those thoughts are inaccurate, according to God’s Word. He has promised to never allow more to come on us than we can bear (1 Corinthians 10:13).

During life’s difficulties, one of the thoughts that is usually persistent is,
I can’t do this; it is just too much; it is too hard
. Watch out for that type of thinking and when you recognize it, remember that it is a lie and replace it with your own God-inspired thought
that goes something like this:
I can do what I need to do because God is with me. This winter season in my life will be over and spring will come
.

Perhaps you need to see yourself in a new way. If you are easily disappointed or discouraged, or if you tend to give up easily, realize that you are not alone in your battles. As a matter of fact, your battles belong to the Lord, and He will fight for you as you continue to trust Him. See yourself in Christ, walking with Him in your life instead of being weak and alone.

In the early years of our marriage I was easily discouraged and each time I became that way, the first thing I did was speak negativity out of my mouth. “Nothing ever works right for me,” “No matter how hard I try I can’t seem to do anything right,” or “We will never have any money.” My negativity was hard on Dave, but he always remained hopeful and positive. During our difficulties, he remained peaceful and happy, and I, on the other hand, was totally miserable. Life does get difficult at times, but we can learn how to navigate those times successfully without losing our peace and joy. The thoughts we allow into our minds, and the attitudes we choose to have, determine whether we have misery or joy. I am grateful that God has changed me, and if you need a change in this area, He can change you too.

When one has a dream or goal for their life, and it finally becomes obvious that they need to change directions, it can be depressing or exciting. Many years ago, I tried to be my pastor’s secretary. I was told the position just wasn’t right for me, and I was let go. I was devastated to say the least, but had I kept the job I thought
I wanted, I wouldn’t be doing what I am doing today. When things don’t work out the way you planned, you don’t have to get discouraged and depressed; instead, you can believe that God has something better for you and get excited to see what it is. Don’t be married to your own plan. Man’s mind plans his way, but God directs his steps (see Proverbs 16:9).

I used to get very discouraged when my plans didn’t work or I didn’t reach my goals, but I finally realized that if I truly wanted to serve God with my life, it shouldn’t matter what I was doing, as long as it was His plan for me. Perhaps we have too many of our own plans, and it is our own expectations that disappoint us. We can and should still pray, “Your will be done, oh God, and not mine.”

One of the ways that we find God’s perfect will for us is to step out and find out what works and what does not work. If something doesn’t work out, don’t give up and waste months in depression; just scratch it off your list of possibilities and go on to the next thing. The choice is yours! I like this quote by Charles Stanley: “Disappointment is inevitable. But to become discouraged, there’s a choice I make.”
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Sometimes I look at finding God’s perfect will as trying to find the perfect new outfit. I go shopping and try on different things. I see how they fit and how they look on me. I see if they are comfortable or not. Are they too tight or perhaps too big? I don’t get
depressed because the first few may not work. I enjoy the shopping trip, and eventually I find the perfect thing that is just right for me. You can look at the dreams you have for your life in a similar way. Keep dreaming and having goals until you find the perfect fit for you!