The French Girl (22 page)

“And is it true that you’ve not only researched, but authored many articles on gender studies and the effects of gender on children?”

“Yes.”

“Could you please explain to the courts what, in your professional opinion as an educator, is in Etoile’s best interests?”

“There are many research studies documenting that children raised by non-traditional families are equally successful as those raised in traditional families.  The mitigating factors in any child’s success are almost always that the child is nurtured, supported and loved.”

“And in your professional opinion, Dr. Becker, what would be the effects of removing Etoile from your home?”

Jean turned and looked at me as Giselle clutched me to her.

For a few seconds, I thought she would not speak. She just stared at us and then finally cleared her throat.

“It would be cruel and traumatic…for all of us,” she said very quietly.

***

When it was my turn, Susan Weatherby waited while I climbed up into the big chair.

“Etoile,” she said, “do you understand about your cousin’s relationship with Dr. Becker?”

“Yes.”

“What do you understand?”

“That they are family.”

“And what does that mean to you, that they are family?”

“That they love each other very much.”

“How is it, Etoile, that you know they love each other so much?”

“Because they take care of each other.”

“How?  How do they take care of each other?”

“They help each other out with things.  We all do chores together and Giselle cuts Jean’s hair and cooks for us and cleans the house while Jean teaches.  Giselle sells things she makes, too, to help pay for things.  And she is a very good painter.”

Susan Weatherby smiled.  “And do you understand what today is about?”

“Yes.”

“Can you explain that to us?”

“It is to see if I can stay with Jean and Giselle.”

“Do you want to stay with them?”

“Yes. Very much.”

“Why?”

We had not rehearsed this part and I did not anticipate the question.  I looked at Susan Weatherby and blinked several times.  She nodded to me.

“Go ahead, Etoile.  Why do you want to stay with them?” she asked again.

I looked over at them both and saw the expression on their faces. Jean tilted her head and nodded, urging me to respond.  Giselle bit her lip and held a tissue to her face.  Jean reached over to her and touched Giselle’s hand very lightly, rubbing the back of it with her hand.

“Because they are like Maman and Papa used to be before Papa died.”

“What do you mean by that, Etoile?”

“That they…they take good care of me. When I fell badly off my bike, Jean carried me all the way up the hill on her shoulders.  It was a very big hill,” I added for the judge.  He nodded and smiled.  “When I got back, Giselle was very upset and worried and sent for Eppy...I mean Dr. Epstein…right away.  She would not let me get out of bed that night and brought food to my room on a tray and fussed over me and let me have extra ice cream. They make sure I do my homework.  Jean brings me books to read all the time.  And every night, Giselle comes in and tucks me into bed.”

“What you’re saying is that they love you.”

“Yes.”

“And you love them.”

I was about to answer when the door in the back of the courtroom suddenly opened up.  It took me a second to realize who it was.  When I did, I leapt from the witness chair and ran down the length of the courtroom to greet Anais who wore a large, oversized dress over her very swollen belly.

Her face was quite puffy.

“Anais!” I said hugging her, but her belly was so big I could barely get my arms around her.  “What are you doing here?”

“Attorney Weatherby,” the judge said, “you seemed to have lost your star witness.”

“Your Honor, we request a five-minute recess unless opposing counsel has any objection.”

“No objection, Your Honor.”

***

“What is she doing here?” I heard Susan Weatherby ask Giselle and Jean.  They both shrugged.  Attorney Tripp came over to Anais.

“May I have a word with you Miss Toussaint?”

“Not without me present,” Susan Weatherby said appearing at his side.

“Court rules allow me to speak to a witness in private.”

“Witness?” Susan Weatherby said.  “We were not advised she was a witness.”

“It was uncertain if Miss Toussaint would be able to make it and if you’ll check your paperwork, it does say, “Miss Toussaint” on the list.”

Susan Weatherby’s mouth dropped open and she stood there looking like she wanted to take a swing at him.  “I’ll object.”

“You’ll lose.”

***

“Anais?” I asked.  “What does he mean witness?  Are you here to ask them to let me stay with Giselle and Jean?”

“I want to speak to my sister alone,” Anais said.

“I wouldn’t recommend that,” Attorney Tripp replied.

Anais turned on her heels at him. “Where can I speak to my sister alone?”

“Right this way,” Susan Weatherby said as she led us into a small room outside of the court.  Both she and Attorney Tripp took up position outside the doors of the room like lions guarding the gate.

***

“Anais,” I asked, “I thought you had the baby.”

Anais looked down at her belly and rubbed it.  “Not yet, but very soon.  Not soon enough.”

“What will you do with it when you have it?”

“I don’t know, Etoile.”

“Why are you here?”

“I cannot let this happen, Etoile. They are
gouines
.”

“Do not say that!” I said grabbing her arm.

“Etoile, you are too young to understand any of this.”

“I am not too young to understand that they love me and I love them, Anais.”

“But there are real families, normal families, who can care for you.  It is hard to give up something you love, but it is the right thing to do.”

“They are my real family.”

Anais shook her head.   “They are not a normal family, Etoile. Maman would not have wanted...”

“Maman?  Maman?  Of course Maman would not have wanted it. Maman did not like anything that was not French.  She hated everything that was different!”

“It is not normal, Etoile.”

“Jean and Giselle are as normal as Maman and Papa used to be.  They care about each other.  They do things for each other. Sometimes they even fight, but they work it out because they love each other.” I placed my hands on my hips.  “Do you know what your problem is, Anais?  Your mind is like the solid ground.  No new ideas can grow in it because it is so hard and closed.  There is no space for anything new to grow.”

“What are you talking about?  The tall one is not even French. You should be with your own people.”

“I am with my own people.”

“Really?  Well I have news for you,
Cherie
. Real French women do not like other women.”

“What do you know about real French women?” I asked, my voice rising.  “Real French women like many things.  Real French women care about other people. And…” I said sticking my finger in her face, “Real French women eat very slowly and savor every bite!”

Anais squinted her eyes and looked at me. “Etoile, what has gotten into you?”

“Please, Anais,” I said taking her arms, “please do not do speak against them.  I beg you.”  She shook her head.  “Anais, you used to protect me.  You would do anything for me.  I am begging you to not speak against them.”

***

There was a small knock on the door.

“We need to go back in,” Susan Weatherby announced.

***

“Your Honor, I’d like to call my last witness to the stand,” Attorney Tripp said.  “I call Anais Toussaint, the older sister of Etoile Toussaint.”

Anais stood up, took the oath and was seated in the big wooden chair.

“How old are you, Miss Toussaint?”

“I am almost eighteen.”

“And do you understand what this case is about, Miss Toussaint?”

“Yes.”

“For the sake of the court, can you please put in your own words what this hearing is about?”

“To grant permanent custody of my sister, Etoile.”

“Thank you.  Now Miss Toussaint, is it not true that in your mother’s declining health, you were the primary caregiver to Etoile?”

“Yes.”

“Can you describe to the court some of the things you did to provide care to her?”

“I made sure she got up for school each morning.  I bought us food and made sure she was clean.”

“You were her surrogate mother, in essence.”

“Objection!” Susan Weatherby said rising.  “That’s a subjective statement.”

“I will withdraw the statement, Your Honor,” Attorney Tripp said bowing slightly.  “My point is that you love your sister very much, yes?”

“Yes.”

“Could you then explain to the courts why you are here today?”

“To make sure something wrong does not happen to Etoile.”

“And what would you consider that something wrong to be, Miss Toussaint?”

Anais looked over at the three of us for a while, with Giselle squeezing my hand and Jean with one arm draped around Giselle’s back.  She began to speak, then stopped.

“Miss Toussaint?”

Anais tossed her head back just like Maman would have, let out a sigh and looked at him.  “I cannot do this,” she said as she slipped out of the chair and walked off.

Attorney Tripp shook his head back and forth.  “No further questions, Your Honor.”

There were no more witnesses.  Susan Weatherby and the other attorney each took a turn speaking about the “merits of the case.”  At one point, Susan turned to us and said, “Look at them, Your Honor.  This child is with the people she loves.  Even her own sister knows that.”

“Your Honor,” Attorney Tripp said after she was done, “this case cannot be judged based upon subjective emotion.  The State does not wish to argue this case based on the fitness of these people to raise the child.  The State will argue that the law is very clear…”

“The law is wrong!” Susan Weatherby said interrupting.

“The law is clear,” Attorney Tripp said back.

***

We waited in the courtroom for what seemed like a very long time before the bailiff asked us to rise again.  I looked over and saw that Giselle’s chest rose and fell very deeply and she clutched the table in front of her so tightly that her knuckles went white.

The judge sat down and pinched his nose with his fingers and sniffed.  Looking at the three of us, he nodded.

“This is a most difficult case,” he began.  “It is hard not to sympathize with the plight of all parties involved; however, my job is not to disburse sympathy, but to rule with a balance of compassion and fairness that sustains the laws of our state and our constitution.  In this matter, the law is quite clear.  There is no legal basis within the State of New Hampshire to grant adoption to an unmarried person.  The child will be remanded to the custody of the State’s Family Services Division at nine a.m. tomorrow morning.”  Turning to us, he said, “I am very sorry.  I wish you all well.”

***

I will never, for all my life, forget the sound of his gavel striking the wooden bench followed by Giselle gasping.  She began to shake her head back and forth.  “
Non
,” I heard her say in a deep tone.  “
Non
, you cannot do this.”

Jean grabbed her by the arm.  “Giselle, don’t,” she said.

“You cannot do this!” Giselle yelled towards the judge, but he immediately rose and without another word, went back out the door behind his bench.

Susan and Jean grabbed Giselle by both arms and practically dragged her away.  Jean reached over towards me with her free arm and steered me out the back of the courtroom.

***

Susan led us all into the small room that Anais and I had just used.

“I’m very disappointed, though not entirely surprised.  We did our best.  I’m so sorry,” she said.

Giselle kept shaking her head.  “
Non
,” she said.  “There must be some way…”

“Giselle,” Jean began to say.

“
Non.  Non
,” Giselle said over and over and then her hands began to shake and for a moment, it reminded me of Maman and how her hands would tremble sometimes.  The room felt very warm all of a sudden and I felt as if I could not breathe.  Eppy rubbed Giselle’s back and tried to calm her down. There was a small tap on the door and the county woman stuck her head in.  I tried to flatten myself against the wall.

“May I come in?” she asked.

Jean stepped between her and Giselle and folded her arms tightly across her chest.

“I wanted to say that I know how difficult this is.  Perhaps it would be easier if Etoile just came with me now.  We could stop by the house to get her…”