The Essential Edgar Cayce (17 page)

So, in conducting thine own life—make the physical corrections necessary, yes—but make also thy mind and thine body, thine going in and thine coming out, thine activities day by day, consistent
with
—and the reward will be—an exemplary life, a
goodly
body, an
open
mind, a
loving
spirit!

Few may show forth that even felt in the heart with the liver bad, for twice does the blood pass through the liver to once in the heart. The liver is the clearinghouse both for that of the blood in and out of the heart and lungs. So in the conduct of the life, in the study, think twice before you speak once—for there’s only
one
tongue but two eyes. There is only
one
heart but seven lobes in the liver; and in thine hands—use that thou hast, and thine eye will be
single
in service, thine tongue will be loosed in the right direction.

THE WORKSHOP OF MARRIAGE

One of Edgar Cayce’s finest readings on marriage was given to a young woman about to be wed. It may be tempting to discount the advice here simply because it was directed at a couple who were years—if not decades—away from a truly deep and mature loving relationship. Yet the fresh innocence of their new love allowed a visionary like Cayce to step back and see the potential of marriage as an ideal. Most partners who came to him asking for advice were already wounded by marital strife.

In the reading, 480-20, Cayce emphasizes how marriage partners are
complements;
a weakness in one, for instance, is likely to be counterbalanced by a strength in the other. The woman is described by him as having strong
leadership
tendencies, the implication being that her husband is weak in that area. Seen from one perspective, this type of filling in the holes for the other partner can work out well; but it also can create challenges in the marriage that must be met creatively, and with considerable self-awareness, or otherwise such a strength-weakness pairing can undermine the relationship. So while Cayce warns the woman not to let her natural strength as a leader overshadow, or even overwhelm, her husband’s efforts to develop leadership qualities in himself, Cayce also warns her not to abandon her own skills and allow herself to become subservient to her husband. And while a delicate balance is required for both the partners
and
the relationship to flower, the psychology of coupling sometimes leads to just such a paradoxical, uneven pairing. For example, one partner may excel at something and so it’s easy for the other partner to feel that he or she could never be as good at it, so “Why bother?” Maybe it’s financial planning, or sociability, or playfulness. But when one partner ends up
carrying
responsibilities for both partners alone, the result can be resentment on the part of
both
partners.

Cayce as marriage counselor picks up on another key issue for healthy husband-and-wife dynamics: Loving relationships are especially vulnerable to
perceived
negligence. The person we love most deeply is usually the one who can hurt us most deeply, particularly if we feel unappreciated or invalidated by that person. Often unintended, such negligence can become a major “stumbling block,” as Cayce puts it, to the marriage. Open, honest communication is the key.

Cayce also emphasizes the importance of taking an interest in the activities of your partner “as though they were a part and parcel and portion of yourself.” But, once again, a delicate balance is needed because each partner needs a sense of
autonomy.
Few marriages could thrive if the partners did everything together; there needs to be room for individuality. The key here is
valuing
your partner’s interests, and that kind of support goes a long way toward building a healthy marriage.

Halfway through the reading, Edgar Cayce hones in on two factors that can determine whether a marriage will be healthy—“an effectual, helpful experience in life,” as he describes it. First, there needs to be an element of the
sacred
in the relationship.
Sacred
is such a powerful word, with connotations of calling up spiritual forces; but, in effect, that is just exactly what we do. Second, we need to avoid
self-indulgence;
put another way, we need to avoid
willfulness,
a need to get what we want without regard for what the other person wants. Such willfulness, such self-indulgence, can sabotage any sacredness in the marriage.

There is considerable detail in the reading about
the home
as well. In fact, we might say that Edgar Cayce places as much stock in the creation of a loving home as he does in the creation of a loving relationship. This emphasis may sound a bit old-fashioned to us today, in our era of broken homes and magazine covers touting the latest remedy for
fixing
a relationship. But to Cayce, the home was a big deal, and perhaps it’s worth closer scrutiny on our part as we ponder how to heal the troubled society we live in. Not only is the home a haven for the couple, it’s also where others can experience the loving
vibrations
generated by the couple. It serves as a haven for family, friends, even strangers. It’s a “garden of beauty” that blesses many.

A final bit of advice comes just before the question-and-answer exchange at the end of the reading, and it neatly summarizes Cayce’s philosophy of how to create a healthy marriage:
Be joyous.
There will be problems in a marriage, naturally, but never forget the power of living joyfully. And when problems come, turn inward, and for this reason alone both partners need an active inner life. By having a clear, strong connection to the spirit inside ourselves, we are able to have a clear, strong connection with our partner.

THE READING

THIS PSYCHIC READING, 480-20,
WAS GIVEN BY EDGAR CAYCE ON JULY 22, 1935.
The conductor was Gertrude Cayce.

GC:
Entity, [480]. Considering her past and present development, together with opportunities in this present life, you will advise her regarding her adjustment to the new life before her. You will answer the questions that may be asked regarding her coming marriage and information given in her life reading through these sources.

EC:
Yes, we have the entity known as or called in the present [480], and the information that has been given through these channels respecting the physical, the mental and the attributes necessary for change in the spiritual or soul development.

In the approach, then, to those changes that are eminent in the mind of this entity in the present, well that all these conditions be taken into consideration; remembering ever as this:

Only counsel may be given, only those conditions that are as ideal without being idealistic, those conditions that are as necessary influences without there being other than the choice of the entity in making for the application of same in the experience.

For as the ways are chosen before thee, you each may find in the new associations and relations the ability to make the best conditions, the surroundings, the experiences that will bring into the experience of each that which will be the most helpful in the soul and development mentally of each; provided the adjustments are made in those directions, with the thought of that necessary in the experience of each to make for such.

As indicated, these will find that they are a complement one to another in a great many ways.

The natural tendency of the entity, [480], is to be the leader, the impelling influence. Do not let this, then, overshadow the abilities or the activities of the mate in
any
way or manner. This does not mean to become, from the mental or the material side, as subservient to his ideas; but let each give and take, knowing that this is to be a fifty-fifty proposition, with you each supplying that which is best within yourselves.

When the necessities are such as to require waiting and patience even, in those things that may at the time appear to be as negligence on the part of the one or the other, do not rail at such times or allow those things to become stumbling blocks; but always
reason
well together.

In those things that pertain to the social life, be considerate one of the other.
Know
that there is the necessity of you each being as interested in the activities of the other as though they were a part and parcel and portion of yourselves. Not in a
demanding
attitude, but you each living your own life, each having your own interests, each having your own responsibilities; and each supplying those necessary influences or forces in each association as to make for a harmonious cooperative activity in such social activities as may be had in every phase of the experience.

Let each budget the time. Let each give so much to the recreation for the body, for the mind, for the social activities, for the necessary activities for the supplying of the needs in their varied relationships. And be
cooperative
one with another in such things.

Let also there be time for the recuperative forces necessary in the experience, those that may be added as elements in the entertainment, the necessary forces for the adding to the
effects
of the abilities in all phases of human experience as correlated to the coordinating of the lives one with another.

The marital relationships, as we have indicated, will become an effectual, helpful experience in the life of the entity; as also in the life of the mate, if the coordinations of their activities in such relationships are made as to be sacred in their notions, their ideas, their activities being not for self-indulgences but as a union of that necessary for the creative forces and influences in the experiences of the life of each, as to bring the crowning influence to the experience of each.

In the establishing of the home, make it as that which may be the pattern of a heavenly home. Not as that set aside for only a place to sleep or to rest, but where not only self but all who enter there may feel, may experience, by the very vibrations that are set up by each in the sacredness of the home, a helpfulness, a
hopefulness
in the air
about
the home. As not only a place of rest, not only a place of recreation for the mind, not only a place as a haven for the bodies and minds of both but for all that may be as visitors or as guests. And remember those injunctions that have been in thine experience in many of thine sojourns, and be thou mindful of the entertaining of the guests; for some have entertained angels unawares. Make thine home, thine abode, where an angel would
desire
to visit, where an angel would seek to be a guest. For it will bring the greater blessings, the greater glories, the greater contentment, the greater satisfaction; the glorious harmony of adjusting thyself and thy relationships one with another in making same ever harmonious. Do not begin with, “We will do it tomorrow—we will begin next week—we will make for such next year.” Let that thou sowest in thy relationships day by day be the seeds of truth, of hope, that as they grow to fruition in thy relationships, as the days and the months and the years that are to come go by, they will grow into that garden of beauty that makes indeed for the home.

In
every
association, whether one with another in thy relationships or with thy own friends, or with the strangers that enter, let thy activities be such that there may come more and more of that which is
directed
by the spirit of
hopefulness, helpfulness,
in thy attitudes one to another.

And as these grow to the harvest in life, the
Lord
may give the increase.

If ye have builded such that hate, envy, malice, jealousy are the fruits of same, these can only bring dissension and strife and hardships. But if the seeds of truth and life are sown, then the fruition—as the life goes on together—will be in harmony. And He, the Father, being thy guide in all will bless thee, even as He has promised from the beginning. For in the fruit of thy bodies may many be blessed, if ye will but seek that
through
the union of thy purposes, of thy desires, with their import in things spiritual, such may come to pass.

Not that the life is to be made long-faced, that no joy is to enter in!
Rather
be ye
joyous
in thy
living,
in thine association, in thy activities, ever. For joy and happiness
beget
joy and happiness; unless the import be of a
selfish
nature.

But when doubts and fears and troubles arise (as they must, as they will in the experience of all), come ye rather together before the throne of grace and mercy, as may be found in the meditation before the Lord. Take thine troubles to Him, not to thy fellow man! For
He
is merciful when
man
may be unkind, jealous, hard-hearted, set, determined. But let thy yeas be yea in the Lord; let thy nays be nay in the Lord.

And in adjusting thyself in these ways and manners ye may bring to thine experience the greater glory of the Father in the earth.

Ready for questions.

Q
In what former incarnation did I know [633]?

A
These will be given in their proper order.

Q
What is our greatest purpose together in this life?

A
Harmony!

Q
How may I express and live up to the highest ideals in marriage?

A
As has been indicated.

Q
As my life reading [480-1] gave that I might attain to the best in this experience through music or the play, how may I coordinate same with marriage and express the highest in both?

A
For in the home is the music of what? As indicated, it is an emblem of the heavenly home. And as these are made into the harmonious experiences that may come in the associations, they may bring indeed the music of the spheres in the activities as one with another, and those that must be contacted in the highest of man’s achievement in the earth—the
home!