The Color of Summer: or The New Garden of Earthly Delights (8 page)

Zebro Sardoya fades out and the screen is filled by a well-known Miami announcer. He has long sideburns and a huge moustache.

A
NNOUNCER
:
(his voice hysterical and his eyes bugging out of their sockets)

Ladies and gentlemen, tonight for the first time we are proud to introduce
Avellanela
—a new milk shake that’ll make your taste buds
shake it!
This all-natural product is made with (and I know you Cuban-American friends of mine out there will know what I’m talking about) avena, avellana, canela, and
Vanilla!
—Sure to become a habit! A taste-treat for your palate! Poetry for the taste buds! And
lots
tastier than Milwaukee suds!—So drink Avellanela! Made from the pure pulp and squeezing of that peerless poetess, our own Gertrudis! Don’t make your stomach grovel for this gruel, this dietary poetry—give it Avellanela! And don’t forget—it’s got avena, avellana, canela, and
Vanilla!
Made by Goya for goys and gays and guys and dolls, for young pissers and old farts alike! And Avellanela comes in plastic or glass bottles—whichever you prefer. Goya—good foi ya!

The announcer raises his arm, milk shake in hand. He takes a big swig and falls over dead. The movie screen is immediately lifted away and
K
EY
W
EST
lights up. Aerial shot of the key, from which the white shafts of arc lights, as though at a big movie premiere, swing back and forth across the sky. Hollywood stars begin to arrive, and they immediately try to steal the show or at least promote their latest pictures. Among the stars are Elizabeth Taylor (who says she supports Avellaneda’s escape), Jane Fonda (who’s opposed), and Joan Fontaine (neutral). There are also sports stars and an entire basketball team, which spontaneously begins to play a pickup game with some of the crowd. Among the sports figures is José Canseco, who declares that he’s going to give a demonstration, right there, of his power as a home-run hitter. And sure enough, Canseco hits one so hard that the ball sails out of Key West and heads out to sea, where it hits Avellaneda in the chest, knocking her unconscious for a few seconds. While rumors fly that the presidential helicopter is about to land at any moment, there arrive, to the sound of snare drums, a delegation of radical feminist lesbians. On a broad lawn alongside the harbor of Key West, they give a demonstration of self-defense techniques, while the Guadalajara Symphony Orchestra accompanies them. When they complete their demonstration of martial arts (perfectly executed), the great poet Primigenio Florido steps up onto the stage.

Florido is wearing a huge pair of earphones, an attempt to improve his hearing. They look like big earmuffs, or the big ears of a donkey, and they stick up high above his head.

P
RIMIGENIO
F
LORIDO
:
(gazing out at the sea where, in the distance, we can begin to see Avellaneda’s little boat)

Oh, there she is! There—on the far horizon!

A figure like a tiny island in the ocean,

like a bobbing buoy on the waves’ crest,

and far in the van, her peerless breast!

Oh, would that I might fly to save her,

would that these old arms could cradle her,

but we must wait—I’ll just wave at her . . .

Oh, that one day that grand, grand heart

beating beneath that bosom divine

might—it’s never too late for love to start—

beat, here, alongside mine!

That swelling breast—

I could gaze upon it without halt

as though I’d turned to a pillar of salt

or a colossus plunked down on the beach.

But the colossus (of poetry, of course) is she—

sailing toward us, but still just out of reach.

(In the stiff wind, Florido’s enormous earmuffs sometimes lift the poet several feet up off the stage and set him down again in the same spot, where, unfazed, he continues reciting his poem.)

Yes, white statue, goddess of alabaster, row,

row! Flee fearsome Fifo Kaster-o.

For how well I know you know,

my dear peerless geographer,

that fiery is the air

and sulfurous the dew

anywhere

you can’t even say Boo.

O kiss of paella,

toothsome heartthrob,

how glad we all are

that you

(as we do)

detest
the ubiquitous mob.

Come to us, my steel-willed pigeon!

Come, fly that horrid dungeon!

Row, Gertrudis, seize that gusty wind

that’s giving me so much trouble! (Shoot!

I can’t keep my feet on the pavement!)

Come, for to you we’ve built a monument—

a bright statue, our kisses mute,

And mumble, mumble, mumble, mumble . . .

Florido’s words are lost as the wind lifts him up to a tremendous height. When he’s almost at the same height as the clouds, though, his earmuffs, I mean earphones, come off, and they fall straight into Avellaneda’s boat. She snatches
them up and uses them for sails. They’re so efficient that the boat skims the water at tremendous speed before the wind.

A
VELLANEDA
:
(full speed over the waves)

Anchors aweigh!

Cut through the spray!

On through the foam,

the whitecapped waves!

Far from home,

sailing on—

as we pull on the oars

we sing out our song!

Florido falls back onto the stage in
K
EY
W
EST
and picks up the poem where he left off, not hearing the screaming of the crowd or the yelling of the Organizing Committee, who try to tell him his time is up. Finally, several people pick him up (still reciting) and carry him off the stage.

Meanwhile, the mayor of Hialeah is addressing the crowd, suggesting that they should take Florido’s words
literally
and erect a monument to Avellaneda in Key West Harbor, where they are all standing, awaiting her arrival. At the mayor’s words, an angry argument breaks out, and fierce competition arises among those who want to carve her statue. Hundreds of sculptors present their projects to the mayor of Hialeah. It is decided that each sculptor will make a statue and submit it to a jury, which will make the decision. Immediately they all start to carve away at statues of Avellaneda, because there’s very little time. Key West becomes filled with hundreds of gigantic statues—Avellaneda nude, Avellaneda with a long dress and a shield on her head, Avellaneda with a dove on one shoulder and a torch in her hand . . . From out of the hundreds of sample statues, the jury gives the award to the one by Tony López, portraying Avellaneda in a long dress, dripping wet with sea water, sailing through a grove of palm trees. Stars twinkle among the palm fronds, and in the top of one of the palm trees sits a naked black man playing a trumpet. A banner reading WELCOME TULA! runs from one side of the grove of palm trees to the other. A crane deposits this magnificent statue at the entrance to Key West Harbor. But the losers protest so bitterly that the jury declares that all the statues are finalists, and therefore should also be exhibited. Now Key West is one huge mob of statues and people, among whom the Guadalajara Symphony Orchestra continues to play. On each statue, a child with long curly locks is sitting.

C
HORUS OF
C
HILDREN
:
(perched on the statues)

Look! Look!

She’s coming! She’s coming!

Another nail

In that pig Fifo’s coffin!

(The lights on the Malecón come up. Raúl is standing next to Fifo.)

R
AÚL
:

Well, I never! Dear me! Did you hear that!

That stubborn Gertrudis just won’t quit!

And adding insult to injury,

those brats are calling you a pig!

I tell you, Fifo—

Why not just cut the old bag loose,

and let
me
get dressed and go out to cruise?

F
IFO
:

That woman is paddling like a speedboat,

and all you can think of is your libido!

R
AÚL
:

Well, it’s
you
and your stupid ideology

that’s made her this heroic prodigy.

(Looking through a spyglass)

My god—somebody’s even erected her a statue—

though
it’s got big feet

and one heel’s crooked on its shoe.

F
IFO
: .

Enough of this chitchat, you fool—

we’ve got to think of something to do.

I know,
we’ll
do a statue, too, Raúl!

And not just some silly statuette—

I want the biggest statue yet!

A statue of ignominy!

A statue of infamy!

A statue of repudiation!

R
AÚL
:

Hey, that’s not a bad solution

but who’s supposed to do the labor?

F
IFO
:

Rita Tonga—if she’s available.

R
AÚL
:

Available!

Why, your every wish is her command.

I’ll get her right on it.

F
IFO
:

Good man.

While Rita Tonga carves out the statue at full speed, Halisia and her corps de ballet perform the “dance of repudiation.” This is a series of enraged leaps, kicks, spits, and the motions of squashing lice and cockroaches and throwing them into the sea.