And now, she felt like crying again. She rubbed at her eyes. It was a different kind of crying, this time, a bittersweet emotion because Rafael had touched her heart with his selflessness, with his infinite capacity for caring and with his unconditional love.
She couldn’t help but remember that awful scene between her father and Rafael. And she’d been stunned when he’d offered to sit with her father while she went home and rested. His compassion and understanding had struck a deep chord within her, arousing feelings she hadn’t had since her mother was alive.
It was at that moment that she finally accepted his love, finally believed that he loved her. And she knew she loved him, too. It was a humbling feeling, receiving this wondrous gift from a man and wanting to return it with all her heart and soul and body. With Rafael beside her, she could face any future. And their lives would always be rich, if not in material things, then in other ways that mattered more ... so much more.
Her mother would have approved of Rafael. As the realization dawned on her, she
wondered where the thought had come from. For a split second in time, she felt her mother’s spirit very close, guiding her. Then the feeling was gone, as quickly as it had come.
She pulled the little green plastic frog from her pocket and stared at it.
“What’s that?” Rafael asked.
“I guess you could say he’s my personal talisman,” she replied. “Puerto Rico has these unusual frogs, called
coquís
, and their croak is quite musical, like they’re singing. And Puerto Rico is the only place in the world where you can find them.” She closed her hand around the
coquí.
My mother gave me this little frog a long time ago, and I always keep him with me.”
“It makes you feel closer to your mother, doesn’t it?” he asked.
“How did you know?”
He shrugged. “Just a guess. I’m glad you have something that makes you feel close to her. I would have liked to meet her. She sounds like a wonderful lady.”
Her chin trembled. She put the frog back in her pocket. “She was. Yes, she was.”
He smiled. “Hey, get outta here. Go home and rest. The nurse will be here in a couple of minutes to shoo us out anyway.” He glanced at her father. “But I’ll be just around the corner. We’ll be fine.”
Gulping back more tears, she nodded and crossed to the door.
#
During the next three days, Rafael took turns with her, staying at the hospital. He managed to work around his lecture schedule, and even brought papers to grade while he sat with her father. Adriana began to feel like a human being again, having the time to sleep and eat and change her clothes without rushing. And with each passing day, her love for Rafael grew and deepened.
Then after all the waiting, after all the long days and weeks of frustration, everything happened at once. Her father regained consciousness and turned the corner. Adriana and he wept together, clinging to each other. He was still weak and slept a great deal, but they unhooked some of the machines and started letting him eat real food.
Juan arrived from L.A. and consulted with Dr. Davenport. They moved her father from ICU to a regular hospital room. And through it all, Rafael stayed beside her, as much as his work would allow, a comforting and solid presence.
Her brother accepted Rafael, and seemed to like him. Her father also acknowledged him and spoke with Rafael briefly. With her brother’s help, she relieved Rafael of his bedside vigils so he could catch up on the work he’d been neglecting.
Dr. Davenport told her that he wanted her father to rest for several days and eat solid food to regain his strength. After her father grew stronger, the doctor explained, he would perform a quadruple bypass operation.
Then the doctor took her to one side and outlined the procedure. He tried to reassure her with statistics about the high success rate of bypass operations. And he finally committed himself, telling her it was his professional opinion that her father would make a complete recovery and live a long and full life.
She thanked the doctor and started to hope again, really hope. When she asked her brother for his opinion, she was comforted to learn that Juan had already discussed the operation with Dr. Davenport and agreed with his prognosis.
All her prayers had been answered, and she’d been doubly blessed, discovering that the unconditional love Rafael felt for her was the most important thing in her life. And she’d finally realized how lucky she was and allowed herself to open up and love him back.
#
On the day of Miguel’s surgery, Adriana and Juan went early to the hospital. They stayed with their father during the pre-op preparations until he was wheeled into the operating room.
Dr. Davenport offered to have Juan observe the surgery, but her brother declined, saying he would rather stay with his sister in the waiting room. Rafael was at the university teaching his classes, but he’d promised to come after his last class was over.
The hours crept by for Adriana. Juan had already warned her that a quadruple bypass would take several hours. She and Juan tried to eat lunch in the cafeteria but only managed to pick at their food.
When they returned to the waiting room, Rafael was there. He greeted them both and then swept her up in a crushing hug, whispering words of reassurance to her.
Then the nurse came in and announced that the operation was over. Dr .Davenport followed soon after, still dressed in his soiled scrubs. With his face wreathed in smiles, he declared the operation a success. Excited and jubilant, the three of them exchanged kisses and hugs. Adriana even felt the need to kiss Doctor Davenport, which made him grin.
They paced the floor for another hour, waiting for the anesthetic to wear off so they could see Miguel. When the nurse finally returned and told them they could visit for a few minutes, Adriana and Juan rushed from the waiting room.
Half-way down the corridor, Adriana realized Rafael wasn’t with them. Turning back, she found him sitting in the waiting room, leafing through a dog-eared magazine.
“Aren’t you coming?” she asked.
He raised his head and smiled. “Not this time. Maybe tomorrow. You and Juan will be enough excitement for today. But I’ll wait here for you.”
“Well, okay. Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.”
She sprinted down the corridor again and entered her father’s room. Juan was standing beside him, holding his hand. She went to her father’s other side and gingerly put her arms around him, bending down to kiss him.
“The doc told me I should be able to go home in a few days,” her father said, shaking his head. “Hard to believe, but it sounds wonderful to me. Can’t wait to get out of here and go home.” He paused and there was a mischievous glint in his eye. “There’s one nurse, the full-figured one with red hair that kind of reminds me of your mother. I might miss her, though.”
Adriana hid her smile behind one hand. She couldn’t believe he’d just said what he’d said—it wasn’t like him. He’d never dated after losing her mother. But it was definitely a hopeful sign. “Oh,
Papá
, we’re so happy. You don’t know how worried we were. But if you’re ogling the nurses, you must be feeling better,” she teased.
“Hey, it’s good to be alive. Made me realize what’s important, and there’s going to be some changes when I’m back to full speed.” He returned her smile and asked, “Where’s Rafael?”
Surprised at her father’s new attitude and that he would ask for Rafael, she replied, “He’s in the waiting room. He thought Juan and I would be enough strain for now.”
“Bring him here,” her father said. “I want to talk with the two of you. No time like the present. Life is short.”
She glanced across at Juan and lifted her eyebrows. Her brother shrugged and offered to get coffee for everyone, except the patient.
She left the room with her brother and found Rafael in the waiting room, still reading the outdated magazine. She explained that her father wanted to see him. Mirroring how she’d reacted with Juan, Rafael lifted his eyebrows but didn’t say anything. She shook her head, not knowing how to explain the sudden change in her father. And she was as mystified by her father’s request as Rafael was.
Hand in hand, they went to her father’s room, but when they entered he had his eyes closed. They started to leave, not wanting to disturb him.
He must have heard them because he called out, “Come over here. I need to talk to both of you, but especially Rafael.”
They moved closer and stood together beside his bed.
“I don’t have much strength, so I’ll make this short,” her father said. Opening his eyes, he turned his gaze on Rafael. “Thank you for helping Adriana. She needed someone.” He paused and licked his lips. “And I want to apologize for the way I acted that night at dinner—”
“Really, Señor de Los Santos, you don’t have to,” Rafael said. “I understand.”
“Don’t cut me off, young man, and don’t call me Señor de Los Santos. It’s Miguel to you.” He coughed and cleared his throat. He touched Adriana on the arm. “Would you please get me a glass of water?”
She did as he asked, pouring one from the carafe beside his bed and putting a straw in it. She held the glass and Rafael leaned in, helping him to sit up and sip from the straw. After a few swallows, he waved it away and said, “I wanted to apologize for my behavior that night. It was inexcusable, and all I can offer as an explanation is that I was concerned about my daughter’s future.” He looked at Rafael. “It was easy to see you were in love with my daughter. Your feelings were written all over your face. You looked like a lovesick dog.”
He started to chuckle but was forced to stop when he started coughing again. After he caught his breath, he continued, “I was like that about Adriana’s mother, Carmen. She was the best thing that ever happened to me.” He turned his gaze to Adriana. “I loved her more than life itself. When I lost her, it was difficult for me to go on.”
He motioned for Adriana to come closer, and then he reached out to her. With tears swimming in her eyes, she grasped his hand and squeezed it.
“I made myself go on because of you children. You weren’t grown, and you needed me. But I felt so inadequate.” He brought her hand to his lips and kissed it. “I knew you were close to your mother, Adriana, as a daughter should be, and I didn’t know how to replace her. All I knew was how to work hard and provide for my family. I lost my dream, so I thought I should help you to find yours. I thought if I did that, I would be a good father.”
“So I drove my children to succeed, especially you, Adriana, but I was wrong. I didn’t know how to teach you about the important things, like your mother did—that loving someone and having a family are far more important than a career.”
He gazed up at her, and his eyes were full of tears, too. “I knew these things in my heart, of course. That’s why I selfishly tried to hold onto you, Adriana. I didn’t want you to date and marry or leave town for a better job. I wanted to keep you to myself. Because ... because ...” His voice broke. “You were all I had left of her, of your mother. And you reminded me so much of her. And I loved you so completely, as I had loved her.” He shook his head again. “I just couldn’t lose you, too.” The tears were streaming down his face.
“Oh,
Papá
,” she said, putting her arms around his neck and hugging him. “I didn’t know. I didn’t understand how much you were hurting. I guess because I was hurting so much, too. And I love you, too,
Papá
. Even if I marry and have my own family, I’ll always love you, don’t you know that?”
“
Claro que, sí
. It was foolish of me to think I could hold onto you.” Over her bent head, he looked at Rafael. “And you’ve found yourself a good man,
m’ija
. I knew he stayed with me so you could rest. After the way I treated him, I wouldn’t have blamed him if he never wanted to lay eyes on me.” He patted her back and shifted against the pillows. “Don’t let him get away. He’s a ‘keeper.’”
“I know that,” she said. She straightened up but hung onto her father’s hand. She’d never known so much love and peace before, as if she were surrounded by it, enfolded in it. Her father loved her, and he had always loved her.
He just hadn’t known how to raise her or show his love and that had made him feel inadequate. He’d done his best, teaching her to make her way in the world. But he hadn’t wanted to let her go. He’d loved her so much he wanted to keep her with him always. What he’d said was a revelation and a catharsis all at once, freeing her, making her feel whole again. Her entire body flooded with a raw and bittersweet knowledge, pushing the shadows of her doubts and fears out.
The door opened and one of the nurses stuck her head in to tell them they’d stayed too long and the patient needed to rest. Adriana looked down at her father and was surprised to find that he’d closed his eyes again and his breathing was regular. Gently, with the pad of her thumb, she wiped the tear stains from his cheeks.
Then she linked her arm with Rafael’s, and they tiptoed from the room. Her brother was waiting for them in corridor. She explained to Juan that their father was resting, and she apologized for monopolizing his time.
Juan glanced and them and smiled, saying he didn’t mind. With a twinkle in his eye, he asked if their father had given them his blessing. At first, she didn’t know what he meant. But then she understood and smiled.
Her brother inclined his head and told them he’d be in the waiting room if they needed him. Adriana watched him go, knowing what she had to do. She turned to Rafael and couldn’t wait another minute to share the feelings flooding her heart.
She grasped his hand and brought it to her face, turning the palm up and nuzzling him. “I love you, Rafael. I guess I’ve always loved you, from the first minute I saw you.” She purposely echoed his words from that rainy day in her car. “I was just too blind to see it.”
Rafael whooped with joy and grabbed her in his arms, spinning her around and around, not caring about the horrified expressions on the nurses’ faces at the nearby station.
When he set her down on her feet again, he said, “Marry me, Adriana. Now. Tonight. There are wedding chapels all over Vegas. We can be married in a couple of hours.”