Authors: Brock E. Deskins
“If they find out I used magic, they will execute us both! Then where will we be?”
“We can test it.”
“How?”
“Use it on the guy talking to them. Make it appear to anyone who might be able to detect such things that he is the one doing it.”
“Then an innocent man gets executed!”
“Ingrid is not a bloodthirsty ruler, and I’m sure they can verify the man’s innocence soon enough. By that time, we’ll have our army and be gone.”
Adam sighed and looked at the marble beneath his feet. “I don’t like it.”
“That’s your conscience giving you advice that cripples your ability to complete the mission. Thousands of lives depend upon us doing our duty. Are you man enough to do your duty, to sacrifice your conscience for the sake of your people?” Garran poked his chin toward the merchant. “Besides, look at him. He’s obviously ears-deep up The Guild’s ass. That makes him the enemy.”
Adam nodded resignedly. “All right, but I do not like it.”
“Do you think I like everything I have to do?”
“Actually, yes, yes I do.”
“Yeah, it is pretty damned fun most of time. Now make with the magic, fancy boy.”
Adam scowled and began weaving the invisible threads of magic.
“…and so if Your Highness would grant me exclusive access to the capital’s blacksmiths, I could provide some steep discounts on my iron ore and ingots,” the merchant said. “It would enrich not just me, but all of the iron workers as well since it would reduce the cost of the raw materials upon which they depend. They could lower their prices, sell more finished products, and thereby increase your tax revenue.”
The old woman sitting next to the Queen touched Ingrid on the arm without looking up from her knitting. Ingrid scowled and motioned to two soldiers standing at opposite sides of the grand chamber. They advanced, halberds held at the ready.
The merchant’s head whipped left and right. “What—?”
Halberd hafts battered the man to floor and beat a rapid staccato upon his body.
“Oh my God!” Adam cried in a hoarse whisper. “What have I done?”
“What the hell happened?” Garran asked.
Adam looked up at the dais. “The old woman must be a sensitive!”
“What the hell is a sensitive?”
“A person who isn’t god-touched but can tell if anyone is using magic.”
“All right, so now we know we cannot use you to gain an edge. It is still a success.”
Adam glared at Garran. “A success? They are going to beat that man to death right in front of us because of me! I hardly call it a success!”
“Keep your damn voice down, or we’re going to join him!” Garran hissed. “He was Guild. He probably ran his mines as close to a slave operation as he legally could. He is likely a cheat and swindler responsible for causing financial hardship for dozens if not hundreds of families.”
“You don’t know that. He might use his wealth to fund an orphanage or run a soup kitchen for the homeless.”
“Out of those two plausible scenarios, which one eases your conscience knowing that you are responsible for his brutal beating, imprisonment, and pending execution?”
Adam watched the guards drag the unconscious man away. “Did you see how long and slender his fingers were? He is probably a pedophile too.”
Garran nodded animatedly. “Oh, I’m almost certain of it.”
“Supplicants, stand forth,” Queen Ingrid commanded.
Garran and Adam approached the dais, touched a knee to the floor, and stood.
Ingrid held a pair of spectacles attached to a slender rod to her eyes. “Mr. Holt, are we mistaken or were we not supposed to have a private meeting this morning?”
Adam said, “That is my fault, Your Grace. I foolishly allowed myself to be kidnapped. It was by the grace of God that Agent Holt was able to liberate me in a timely manner.”
“Not quite timely enough or we would not be engaging in such a public forum,” Ingrid responded. “When one has the whole of a nation intent upon capturing them, one should take into account such things when scheduling appointments. Particularly when they come with their hand extended like beggars.”
“Of course, Your Grace. I do apologize.”
“I grow weary of this day. What is your request?”
“I understand you supported my father when he came to you in hopes of breaking the grip The Guild has on our people. I come asking that you might do the same for me so that the seed you and my father planted can grow to maturity.”
“In what form of support are you asking?”
“At this moment, two thousand Hillmen are reaping chaos across Anatolia, but they cannot take on the kingdom’s full military might. While the Hillmen distract a large portion of Anatolia’s army, I could lead another large force, take the capital, and put my sister on the throne where she belongs.”
Ingrid gave Adam a sympathetic smile. “While morally I still support what your father tried to create, I cannot provide material assets to this cause. Your father was a good man, and he gave his life for what he believed in. So did your lovely mother and darling brother, but I cannot in good conscience ask my kingdom and her people do the same. I offer you my hospitality and promise of safety until you are ready to continue on your journey, but that is all I can give you.” Ingrid stood, nudged her husband to do the same, and declared, “This court is now closed.”
A man on the palace staff escorted Garran and the Prince from the hall and to a suite of rooms. Two copper tubs filled with steaming hot water occupied the marble bathing chamber just off the opulent bedroom. Two sets of clean clothes were laid out on the bed.
“I will have dinner delivered to your rooms in an hour,” the servant said and departed.
Adam sat on the edge of the bed and held his head in his hands. “What do we do now?”
Garran was already stripping off his clothes and flinging them onto the floor. “I don’t know about you, but I’m going to take a bath. Then I’m going to go get us our army.”
Adam looked through the open door as Garran slipped gingerly into the tub. “She said she was not going to help us. And since when are you in a hurry to take a bath?”
“I missed one appointment with the Queen already. It would be beyond stupid for me to miss another.”
“What are you talking about?”
“You really need to learn how to read people. Of course she said she wouldn’t help us. She had to. The Guild pays her servants quite well to relay everything that happens in the palace, and she knows that.”
“Or she said it because that’s what she meant.”
“We get to our room and find clean clothes and hot bathes already waiting. That can only mean one thing.”
“That we’re filthy and we stink?”
“That she wants a private meeting with me tonight…a very private meeting. The woman was practically bursting with sexual tension.”
“Garran, she is the Queen of Opatia and a married woman! Even if she does want to speak in private, it does not mean she wants to have sex with you! Not everyone is driven by uncontrolled sexual desire like you are!”
“Did you not see Mathias? The man is as sexually exciting as a pile of horse droppings. Women have needs, and women who rule a kingdom have greater needs than anyone. Trust me. She’s going to give us our army. She just needs the right kind of encouragement.”
“Your kind of encouragement is going to start an international incident and get us executed.”
“Maybe, but it’s a good way to go.”
Garran scrubbed until his skin was pink. It was the first time Adam had ever seen Garran truly clean and remotely presentable. It was possibly the first time Garran had either.
“Garran, please don’t make this any worse than it is.”
Garran buttoned up the silk shirt and straightened his lapels. “When you are at the end of your rope, you can’t possibly make it worse. Up is the only way to go.”
“You can still wrap the end around your neck!”
Garran strode from the room, leaving Adam with his feeling of impending doom to keep him company. He navigated the labyrinthine halls until he found the same servant who had escorted him and Adam to their room standing next to a door.
“There you are. I suspected I would find you somewhere,” Garran said as he approached.
“Are you lost, sir? Do you need directions back to your chambers?”
Garran opened the door and looked in on the empty bedchamber. “No, this will do perfectly. You can inform the Queen that I await her.”
“Why should I do that?”
Garran winked at the man. “Trust me; she’s expecting me.”
“For your sake, I certainly hope so, sir.”
Garran hurried the man along with a brush of his hand and entered the room. He lay on the bed in what he hoped was a seductive pose but then thought it might lack a certain subtlety to which Ingrid was accustomed.
He chose to stand next to the fireplace with one hand resting on the mantle, the other mimicking holding a glass of wine. God, how he could go for some wine right now. He broke his pose, placed a chair next to the fireplace, and stood with one foot on the seat while striking the previous posture.
“Good evening, Your Majesty,” Garran said to the empty room. “I hope this evening finds you well.”
Too formal
. “Hello, Ingrid. Guess what has two thumbs and can pump like a blacksmith’s bellows?” Garran pointed his thumbs at his chest. “This guy!”
No
, t
oo familiar
.
The door opened, and the Queen strode in.
“Your Maj—”
Startled, Garran’s foot slipped through the slats in the chair back. He tried to extract his foot only to trip and fall onto his back. He raised the chair over his head and furiously kicked at it with his free foot.
“Gah, sonofabitch!” Garran splintered one of the slats, freed his foot, and clambered onto his feet. He brushed the front of his shirt with his hands. “Your Grace, I am so glad you could join me this evening.”
Ingrid looked down her nose, her lips pursed. “You are a funny little man, Agent Holt.”
“Thank you, Your Grace.”
“We are not amused. What is it you wanted of me?”
“I was hoping we could revisit Prince Adam’s proposal of support.”
“It is a fool who throws good money after bad. I will not add bodies to the mound as well. Give me one good reason why I should change my mind.”
“One?” Garran grinned, tugged at the laces of his trousers, and dropped them to the floor. “I’ll give you eight.”
Ingrid raised her spectacles to her face, leaned forward, and scowled. “I count five at best.”
Garran shifted nervously. “I hadn’t expected you to have such a keen mind for math.”
“It is more a matter of spatial reckoning than mathematics, and unless you can miraculously conjure another three…reasons, we are finished here.”
Garran’s grin slipped into a frown and his shoulders slumped in resignation. His eyes brightened, his smile returned, and he touched the tip of his tongue to his lower eyelid. Ingrid lowered here spectacles, cocked her head, and arched her eyebrows.
“Garran?” Adam called through the open door of one of the palace’s many bedrooms.
He closed the door and moved on to the next. He had slept in fits all night, and when morning came and Garran had not returned, he went in search of him. He had looked in at least a dozen rooms without luck, and his fear that Garran had managed to get himself arrested or even killed, mounted.
Adam opened another door, poked his head through the opening, and called out. “Garran?”
A form on the bed stirred and moaned, his face buried in a pillow, a sheet covering him to his waist.
Adam stepped into the room and stopped halfway between the door and the bed. The chamber reeked of alcohol, opium smoke, and sex.
“Garran?”
Garran rolled over, blinking away the sleep and morning light. “Muh?”
“Thank God! What have you been doing all night?”
Garran sat up and rubbed his face and head. “Getting you your army like I said I would.”
“You did it? How?”
“Just like I said I would. Why do you ask stupid questions and then never pay attention to the answer? It is very annoying.”
“You…with the Queen?”
“No, me with the King and his favorite hunting hounds.”
“Seriously?”
“No, not seriously! Of course with the Queen, you nitwit!”
“How?”
Garran’s head sagged and he groaned. “This is what happens when you dump a boy off with a bunch of damned priests. You and I really need to sit down and have a talk about men and women.”
“I understand how! I mean…how?”
Garran smiled. “I used my most powerful charms. That’s how.”
“Oh my god, you drugged her?”
“No, you prick!” Garran pressed a hand to his forehead. “I am not up for this kind of conversation with you just yet. Like I told you; the Queen is a woman with unmet sexual needs…nigh-insatiable sexual needs.”
“Damn it, Garran, she is a married woman and the Queen! You could have gotten us both thrown into prison or executed!”
“Oh, please, Mathias doesn’t give a damn as long as it’s discrete. Hell, he’s probably glad someone relieves him of the burden. You know, for being the heir to the most powerful kingdom in the world, you don’t know a thing about court life. Besides, I prepared for the possibility. You know that.”
“Did you drop the key into the correct cell this time?” Adam asked sarcastically.
Garran looked around the room. “You know, I’m not sure what I did with it. Oh well, it doesn’t matter now. We got our army. I’ll explain the details once we’re on the road.”
Garran stood and bent to retrieve his clothes from the floor.
“What the hell is that?” Adam exclaimed as he watched Garran.
Garran looked over his shoulder and rolled his eyes. “Don’t act as if you’ve never seen my ass before. Stop being such a prude.”
Adam pointed. “What the hell is hanging out of it?”
“Huh?” Garran spun to get a look at whatever it was that had Adam so flustered and felt something slap against his thigh. Bending double at the waist, he looked between his legs.
Adam averted his eyes. “Don’t bend over! That makes it so much worse!”
“So that’s where those went.”
“What the hell are they?”
“Those are ass beads.”
“What are they doing hanging out of your backside?”
Garran straightened up and blinked uncomprehendingly. “I think the name does an adequate job of describing their purpose.”
“Why would you put them in there?”
“Firstly, I am only one of two…or five, people who might have done the actual insertion. Secondly, if I have to explain it, there is no way you are going to understand it, so let’s just forego your usual judgments and deal with the situation like adults.”
“Deal with it how exactly?”
“I need you to pull them out.”
“Like hell! I’m not pulling them out!”
“They damn well can’t stay in there!”
“Why do I have to pull them out? You put them in there, you pull them out.”
“Unproven accusations aside, I believe those were the draw cords once attached to the curtains, and their length could be quite substantial. Pulling them out at the wrong angle could do some real damage, so I need you to do it.”
Adam crossed his arms. “You should have thought of that before using your anus like a rucksack.”
Garran grinned. “Hey, maybe that key is at the end of them.”
“This is not funny!”
“It is a little.”
“Not. At. All.” Adam looked around the room. “Maybe we can tie a cord to them and attach the other end to the door hand or something. Then you can pull them out yourself.”
Garran shook his head. “It won’t work.”
“Why the hell not?”
“Because they’re ass beads, not a loose tooth!” Garran began backing toward Adam. “Now, pull out my ass beads.”
Adam backed away, his hands held high. “No! Get away from me!”
Adam tried to retreat through the bedroom door, but Garran managed to block his path and backed him into the corner of the room.
“Just grab the end and I’ll walk them out,” Garran ordered.
Adam held his hands over his head and tried desperately to push himself through the wall. “No, I’m not touching anything that has been in your ass!”
Both men looked over when they heard someone gasp. A chambermaid stood in the doorway holding a stack of folded linens, her eyes wide and her hand held over her mouth.
“This is not what it looks like,” Adam swore.
Garran swiveled his head toward her as he bent forward in front of Adam. “It is a little.”
The poor woman averted her eyes and fled from the room.
“I suppose that could have gone have better,” Garran said.
With a frustrated growl, Adam grabbed the dangling end of beads and gave them a yank as if he were spinning a giant top. Garran stumbled forward and sank to his knees next to the bed with a groan.
“Are we finished here?” Adam asked hostilely.
Garran gasped as he tried to catch his breath. “I know I am. Whew, I thought the Queen had pumped that well dry last night. Help me find my boots.”
Garran ducked down and looked beneath the bed. He leapt away as a small, furry shape rolled out and streaked from the room.
“I’ll be damned,” Garran muttered. “He was real.”
“Was that…a tiny man in a bear suit?” Adam asked, unable to reconcile his mind to what he saw.
“Yeah…things got…things got a little weird last night.”
Adam turned and stalked from the room.
“Where are you going?”
“I am going to go pray for your soul.”
“Good luck with that,” Garran scoffed as he sat on the bed and laced up his boots.
***
Gregor slapped Gordon with enough force to stagger him. “You stupid sonofabitch!”
Gordon wiped a trickle of blood from his mouth and stood straight. “That is the last time you raise a hand against me, Agent Ward.”
Gregor advanced, his hand reaching back for another strike. “Who the hell do you think you are?”
“I am the King! I am your King, and you will begin treating me as such!”
“Do not forget who made you King.”
“How can I when you take every opportunity to remind me? I know who made me King, and I know how to follow orders. The people know who pulls my strings, but knowing it in their minds and feeling it in their hearts are two very different things. The only reason this coup of yours went off so well was that they had lost faith in Remiel. There are still people within this city and across the kingdom who want to see my wife on the throne and all three of our heads adorning the walls. When you openly undermine and mock me, you give credence to their propaganda and fuel the fires of rebellion.”
“Our young friend is right, Agent Ward,” Joshua Roux said. “We made him King, and we need to, at least publicly, show that he is a leader to be respected. Agent Law’s defeat was a serious blow but a temporary one. Count us fortunate that he survived and will mend.”
Gregor glared at Gordon a moment and stepped back. “All right. It’s nice to see you are finally growing some balls, Gordon. Just make sure they don’t get so big that you step on them. Victor is gravely wounded, and Holt and Adam are still running amok plotting our demise.”
“I did what anyone would have done in my position. Victor is the one who nearly got himself killed, not me.”
“Fine, he underestimated Holt. Do you have another move, or shall I do my job?”
“Perhaps if you had done it properly, we could have resolved this issue months ago.”
Gregor cocked back his fist to strike Gordon, but he held it in check when the door opened and Dragoslav entered the room.
“You wanted me?” He looked at the irate senior agent and smirked. “Gregor.”
Gregor returned his look with a scowl. “Zeegers.” He turned to Gordon. “This is your plan, to counter a lunatic with a psychopath?”
“Dragoslav has acquitted himself very well,” Joshua said.
“Yeah, he’s a good dog until he decides to turn on you. There is a reason I tossed him into a hole never to see the light of day again.”
“For which I say let bygones be bygones,” Dragoslav said. “I’m just happy to serve my kingdom once again.”
“While it’s convenient.”
“We’ve all got our motivations.”
“Dragoslav,” Gordon interrupted, “you have likely heard of Agent Ward’s failure. I have just received a missive via diplomatic courier that Agent Holt and Adam Altena left Opatia several days ago and appeared to be heading toward Artemisia. I need you to kill Agent Holt and bring Adam back here. Can you do that?”
“If he can die, I can kill him.”
“Garran nearly killed my best agent, Dragoslav,” Gregor said. “Do not discount him no matter what you think you know about him.”
“Victor was never your best agent, Gregor. If you weren’t so high and mighty about being transcended, you would know that. Victor got beat because he was arrogant enough to fight him. My ego doesn’t require such foolish affirmation. He’ll be dead before he knows he’s been engaged.”
“I have the utmost faith in you, Dragoslav,” Gordon said. “If you leave now and use the courier line, you should be able to reach Merribourne ahead of them or shortly after they arrive. They will likely engage Callum and beg for support as they have done in Arnao and Opatia. From there, I suspect they will take a ship, but to where I cannot say.”
Dragoslav ducked his head and departed.
“What do we know about his meeting with Ingrid?” Joshua asked.
“She flatly refused to aid him other than to offer them her hospitality,” Gordon answered. “She sympathizes with their plight and all but confessed to financially aiding Remiel, but her direct support died with him.”
“I would not be too sure about that,” Gregor interjected. “She met them in open court where she knows we have spies. Of course she denied them in such a public forum. That does not mean they did not engage in further talks in private.”
“Do you think she will move against us?” Joshua asked. “Opatia can muster a respectable army on short notice if they have to.”
“I doubt it. If she does, we will know long before they can cross the border. Our standing forces are likely enough to prevent her from launching a successful invasion. They would never make it anywhere near Leva, and she knows it.”
“That would be true if half of them weren’t off chasing these damned barbarians across my kingdom!” Gordon exclaimed.
Joshua nodded. “They are becoming a nuisance and are cutting into our profits deep enough to make us bleed. I will order The Guild to recruit a legion of mercenaries to deal with the Hillmen so our home forces can protect the capital and guard the border just in case Ingrid is foolish enough to take advantage of the distraction. I only need two years at most to replace her just as we did Remiel.”
Gordon smiled. “It appears that we have everything in hand.”
Gregor scoffed and shook his head. “If you think that, then you are a fool.”