Tempest of Vengeance (37 page)

Danial separated from me, looking at me
expectantly. I tilted my head to give him access to my neck vein.
Without preamble, Danial bit down gently into my flesh. I winced in
pain, but made no noise, holding him close, tears slipping out even
as I tried to blink them back. He made soft noises of contentment
as he fed from me, but gave no other response. As the seconds
passed without anything more, I grew more worried.
Dear God, let
him remember me. Let my blood be close enough to what it was to
trigger his memory.

Danial pulled back from me, giving my neck a
gentle kiss to heal it. “Dev, this is not Sar. Her blood is not as
it should be, like spring.”

My stomach roiled, as I felt Lash come up
behind me again, and take my hand. I squeezed his hard, trying to
breathe quietly, wanting this moment to pass, for Devlin to fix it
somehow, for the romantic reunion I’d dreamed of to magically
replace this heartbreaking nightmare I hadn’t anticipated.

“You know how much I loved Sar, as you did,”
Danial went on. “But I can taste this is not her, though this
woman’s blood is unusually close, almost like summer.”

I turned to Lash with a sob, and he hugged
me, stroking my hair. “Shh.”

Danial noticed us, his attitude becoming
spiteful. “Obviously, this is one of your...women you share with
Lash. Sar loved Theo, she was his wife, she would never have
touched Lash, not in a million years.”

“I’m telling you this is Sarelle,” Devlin
said, his tone bitter. “It is you who are not remembering right,
Danial. Sarelle fell in love with Lash this past summer.”

Danial bared his fangs in a vicious snarl.
“Why are you doing this, trying to pass off one of your whores as
the love of my life?”

“Can you not see how much she cares for you?”
Devlin said abruptly, his tone switching suddenly to umbrage. “You
are tearing her heart out with your words, with your denial of her!
Stop being such a thoughtless bastard!”

Danial turned to me, his face smoothing into
the polite mask that he wore at his Hallow’s parties for the
clients he didn’t care for but felt he could not be rude to. He
came to me, took my hand, and kissed it. “You should go and change
clothes,” he said softly. “I’ve made you a mess, Lady. But I thank
you, for your blood.”

I nodded, and darted from the room, Lash
coming after me. At the door, I turned for one last look. Ulysses
was still moving weakly, trying to crawl away. Danial grabbed him
roughly, and then sank his fangs to the hilt in Ulysses’ neck once
more. Ulysses let out a cry of pain, his desperate eyes locking on
mine in an unspoken plea. Devlin shut the door softly, blocking my
view.

“Come.” Lash led me to Devlin’s room, and
helped me take off my clothes, and get in the shower. He locked the
door, then braced it with a chair. Then he took off his clothes as
well, and got in the shower with me, putting his gun within reach.
For a long time we just stood under the spill of the water, holding
each other silently.

“I’m sorry,” Lash hissed sorrowfully.

I hugged him, saying nothing. What was there
to say? I was sorry, too, that Danial didn’t remember me, that he
was confusing me with Anna, or some other woman.
It’s something
that he remembers a Sar who he did love once. For now, that’ll have
to be enough.

* * * *

Devlin carefully broached the subject early
the next morning, when he, Lash and I awoke before dawn.

“Danial still loves you, Sar,” he said,
caressing my back. “But his memories are not what they were. I
don’t know if it is temporary or if it is permanent damage, from
him being without a heartbeat for so long. Titus said if his
memories were altered, that it would be permanent. He does not have
amnesia. This is not a daytime soap opera, unfortunately.”

“What does he remember me looking like?” I
murmured, my back to him. “Is he confusing me with Anna?”

Devlin eased closer to me, and wrapped his
arms around my waist. “You need to brace yourself.”

I tensed beneath his touch, waiting
anxiously.

“Spit it out, Dev,” Lash hissed, his fangs
extended. “Tell her and stop dragging this out.”

“There was a woman Danial loved a few years
after Anna died,” Devlin continued. “Her name was Gabriella. She
was the first one I took from him, and her loss was probably the
hardest to bear. She died tragically, at a demon’s hands.” He
paused. “He remembers his Sar as looking as she did, and not as you
do.”

“What did she look like?” I said more harshly
than I meant to, as I turned over in bed to face him.

His eyes held apprehension, the gold of them
gleaming in the darkness. “You remember Angelica and Monica?” Dev
said tentatively. “She looked like them. Black hair, and bright
blue eyes, with maybe a little green in them.” Devlin paused, as if
gathering himself. “You remember the photos of Danial and me, when
we were together with a woman, or women? They were all of a type,
Sar. Danial has always favored dark hair and blue eyes exclusively.
At least he did, until he met you.”

I looked away, trying not to cry, as Devlin
hugged me tightly.

How did I never see it?
I’d looked for
a pattern in the women that had been in the pictures I’d gone
through of Devlin’s, but I had really been looking for one with
Devlin. And there had been no pattern, not with him. He liked women
of all coloring, and sizes, too, though he seemed to prefer buxom
women, with larger breasts and hips. But Danial had always been
with a dark haired woman, if a woman was in the picture. For most,
I couldn’t see the color of their eyes, as the pictures had been in
black and white. But there had been one small oil painting of
Danial and a woman. She had been dressed in blue, with blue eyes
and dark hair, Danial with his arms around her, and Devlin posing
on the other side of her.
Monica and Angelica looked like
sisters. That woman Erica, the one he’d tried to hurt me with when
we’d first broken up, Danial had said she’d had black hair and blue
eyes, too...

“Sar,” Devlin said, interrupting my thoughts,
“Danial somehow thinks you should look like Gabriella did, and have
Anna’s blood. Please give him time. When he is around you enough,
he will see you for who you are, I’m sure of it—”

“What if he doesn’t? What if he never
remembers me, or what we were to each other? He thinks I’m dead now
anyway!”

“Shh,” Lash hissed, stroking my hair. “He
will love you again in time, Sar. He fell in love with you once,
and you are still you.”

I didn’t reply.
He fell in love with me
because I saved his life one night. But without that, he probably
wouldn’t have given me a second look. How can I be the woman he
fell in love with when the woman he remembers isn’t me?

* * * *

The next day, when I went downstairs to make
Lash and Venus breakfast, I found Danial in the kitchen. I braced
myself for some comment, but he just looked at Lash and me, smiled
slightly, and said good morning. I felt very odd seeing him so
casually while knowing he didn’t know who I really was. To calm
myself, I ignored him and focused on making breakfast with Lash.
Danial stayed just long enough to get a glass of water, then
left.

Seeing my upset, Lash made no mention of
Danial at all. Then Venus asked quietly, “Why doesn’t Danial like
me anymore?”

I hugged her, pushing aside my own sorrow.
“He does, he’s just been through a very bad time. Please
understand, V, the way he acts right now has nothing to do with his
feelings for you. He just needs some time, after that long sleep he
had.”

She nodded, but her huge golden eyes remained
sad.

Devlin came downstairs, as we were finishing
breakfast. Lash took him aside, and told him what had happened. He
picked Venus up immediately, and went in search of Danial. I stayed
with Lash, knowing it was best without anyone saying anything.

In a half hour, Devlin was back, sans Venus.
“Danial is playing with her,” he said, resting his hand on my
shoulder. “He remembers her, and they are getting along fine. He
was upset because he saw you and her together. The way you might
have felt if you’d witnessed Monica taking care of T, when he was
little.”

“Dev, I can’t do this,” I said, taking a deep
breath, and trying to be calm. “I can’t not be who I am, just
because he doesn’t remember me.”

“I will talk to him again later,” Devlin said
in a soothing tone. “Don’t concern yourself. You know Danial, Love.
He is polite to a fault. I told him just now if he has anything to
say about you at all, he was not to say it to you, but to me. That
you were mistress here, and could do whatever you pleased, and he
was not to say or do anything to offend you. He agreed to
this.”

Lash didn’t comment, but his expression said
he thought this solution of Dev’s was sub-optimal.

I went for a long walk later, taking time
alone to decide if I should try further to make Danial remember, or
leave him alone for now. Darkness and Ghost ran ahead of me, happy
the snow was only a few inches deep. Thankfully, Titus was doing a
good job of keeping a trail open for my daily walks.

After a solid hour of weighing the
pros—heartfelt reunion, everyone back to normal—to the
cons

Danial voicing again that I was one
of Devlin’s whores, I decided to do it
.
No matter how much
it hurt, I had to at least try, after all he had done for me over
the years.

About five, I fluffed my hair as Tatiana had
shown me long ago, and put on a deep red long sweater. I tried to
put the fox head choker on myself, but it wouldn’t fasten
. It’s
been too long since he’s shared blood with me. Whatever was in my
system’s long gone.
I debated putting on the fox head earrings
by themselves, but decided against it.
It may enrage him.
I
debated removing the diamond ring he had given me and the swirled
wedding band of many colors, but decided against it.
He saw that
already yesterday.

I went to one of the guest bedrooms—Danial’s
new bedroom, according to Dev. His few older books of poetry were
there, and the carvings Theo had made for him in their cabinet. I
noticed with a jolt that the Woman and the Cougar were there too,
but didn’t say anything. Because the biggest surprise was T there
visiting with Danial.

My son glanced at me as I entered, his
expression distressed. “I’m going to go now, Dad. If you want to
come back to work—”

“No,” Danial retorted flatly. My mouth
dropped open, as I gaped at him comically. But more surprise
followed as he continued. “I spent too many years working. I should
have spent them with her. I should have spent every minute with
her! And it’s too late now. She’s dead.”

“Mom is not dead, I told you—”

“T, I loved your mother. Don’t tell me lies
to make me feel better, or because you think I’ll forgive that
bastard you are calling your partner.”

“Terian had nothing to do with this!”

“He wasn’t there, that night she was
attacked! She died because of him! And I was hurt because his uncle
wasn’t doing his job! Demons can’t be trusted! They’ll let you down
every time!”

“I love you, Dad,” T said, his voice rough
with emotion. “But I can’t listen to this. Good-bye.”

T strode out, and Danial reclined back on the
edge of the bed. I hesitantly went in and sat next to him. He
looked at me with hostility, then his expression softened.

“I’m sorry, for your loss,” I said
quietly.

“Thank you...um...?”

“Call me ‘Lady’,” I said, staring at him
penetratingly, hoping to see a glimmer of memory surface.

Danial just nodded. “Thank you, Lady. My son
doesn’t seem to understand, but I hear compassion in your voice,
something that piques my curiosity. Why should you empathize with
me, since we do not know each other?”

Danial’s words were hard, but also etched
with deep sorrow. That only made his manner a trifle easier to
bear. “Because I heard about what you have lost, and also about
your family.”

“That bastard Ulysses orchestrated the rape
of my daughter,” Danial said, his eyes glowing red. “Devlin refuses
to kill him. He said he needs him alive for some reason.”

For Lash, in case he began to fail.
I
stayed silent, knowing my explanation would not give him
solace.

“I feel like I’ve lost everything that ever
meant anything to me.”

“You have your children, and your brother,” I
said, putting my hand hesitantly over his. “You are alive. That’s
something.”

“You are right,” Danial said, wiping his
eyes. “She can live on in me.” He let out a breath, then glanced at
me. “You should go. I’m sure my brother is looking for you by now.
His desires need sating on an hourly basis. But you probably know
that well, Lady.”

It’s obvious there’s not even a
glimmer.
I took a deep breath, and went to leave.

“Please Lady,” Danial called softly from
behind me. “I would ask that you never wear red again in my
presence. Though you don’t look like my Sar at all physically,
there is something about you when you wear red that reminds me
strongly of her. It makes me remember her, and I still feel the
pain of her loss too deeply.”

“I don’t mind, Danial,” I replied, keeping my
back to him so he didn’t see my sudden tears. “It’s very touching
that you loved her so much.”

“I think about her every hour of every day.
She was the love of my life, even when she was married to my best
friend. When she finally agreed to be mine, to live with me, those
were the happiest years of my life. Even when we were fighting, and
her blue eyes would flash with fire—”

I brushed the tears out of my eyes, and tried
to compose myself enough to listen.

“I never stopped loving her. She was so
strong. She had so much heart, and hope. She was kind, too,
especially to even the smallest of animals.”