Sudden Devotion (26 page)

He walked hesitantly to the couch. She sat in the chair across from him. He wished she had sat somewhere he could be nearer to her. But he couldn’t push her. He was about to speak when he heard her strangled voice.

She cleared her throat and took a drink of water from the bottle that had been sitting on the coffee table. “I’m glad you’re here. I was hoping that…I need to explain something to you, Mitch. I don’t know if you’ll understand but I…I need you to hear me out. When I’m done, I’ll listen to anything you have to say.”

His hopes lifted a bit at her statement. She was glad he was here, and she was going to listen to what he had to say. “Okay, honey.”

She bit down on her lower lip and took a huge breath. “Mitch, I have never felt pain like that before. I died. I felt myself dying when I walked in and found you like that.” She held up her hand. “No, please. I promise to listen to you, just let me get this out. My thoughts are so muddled right now that if I don’t just let them flow out, I’m afraid I won’t say everything I need to.”

Mitch could see how serious she was and took a calming breath before nodding his agreement.

“Thank you. I…I heard everything you said at the office. And I believe that you love me. I know you didn’t want to hurt me. Oh, Mitch. This is so hard. I…I was hysterical when I left. I must have fainted or something. I don’t know because when I woke up, Patrick was carrying me. He took me back to his place.”

I don’t want to hear this
. He bit his tongue and tried to hide the anger boiling below the surface.

Sara hesitated for just a moment before continuing, “He laid me down in bed and…”

“Stop!” Mitch cursed himself for the way he had just screamed at her. She hurt when it had happened. She never would have been there if it wasn’t for that damn bitch Claudia. Getting up from the couch, he went to his knees in front of her and took her hands. “Baby, please. I can explain, just don’t make me listen to this.” He dropped his head in her lap and held onto her.

Sara was startled at first by his emotional response. Where had it come from? She went through what she had told him, trying to see what had set him off. She thought about that when she realized what he had suspected.

“Mitch, do you think I slept with Patrick?” Her hand had unconsciously been rubbing the back of his neck.

His grip tightened on her. “I don’t care. Let’s just not talk about it, please.” He looked up at her now. “You were hurt. You weren’t thinking clearly.”

“Mitch, I was hurt but I…”

“No.” He abruptly got up from her and paced the room. “Honey, I won’t blame you. None of this was your fault. I just wish you had listened to me before you left the office.”

She listened to the distress in his voice. No matter what he had done, she didn’t want to cause him the same pain he had caused her. She knew how bad it hurt.

“Mitch, I couldn’t stay. I needed time away from you. Time to think.”

“Time with Patrick?” He snapped back at her.

The cutting words sounded cold and unfeeling. How could he talk to her like that after what he had done?

It made her angry. “Look.” She stood up now. Walking directly toward him, she pointed a finger in his face. “You did this, not me. You told me you loved me, but you slept with her, anyway. You have no idea how that felt. The pain of it was the most horrific thing I’ve ever experienced in my entire life. What right do you have to judge me when you’re the one who didn’t care about me enough to remain faithful after only a couple of weeks?” she shouted at him, her voice trembling.

“I wasn’t, damn it. God, why won’t you listen to me? I’m trying to be understanding, but you can’t expect me to hear this!”

“
You’re
trying to be understanding? Well, how incredibly generous of you.” She stormed out of the room.

“Sara, honey, wait. I’m sorry. This is all coming out wrong. Please, stay and talk to me.”

She stopped for a moment and with her back still facing him she said, “Give me a couple of minutes. I need some aspirin and water. I’ll be back.” She walked out of the room.

He stood there and watched her leave. What the hell was wrong with him? She didn’t know he hadn’t cheated. When she went to Patrick’s she had assumed that Mitch didn’t love her enough to not sleep around on her. If he had walked in and found her just the same way, he would have assumed the same thing she had.

He had to calm down. If he didn’t, they would never be able to work things out. He turned to face the window. Looking out, he thought of how hard it would be for him to forget that she had slept with Patrick. But he knew, he didn’t have a choice. He loved her, more than anything or anyone in the entire world, and none of this was her fault.

“What’s this?” Sara demanded. “Why were you at the hospital? And what is this stuff they found, Diphenhydramine HCL?” She slowly sounded out the word.

Mitch watched her. He had been so lost in his own thoughts that he had forgotten he left the lab report on the fridge. “Honey. Can we sit down?”

She sat in the chair and waited, her hands shaking. “What is it? Are you sick?” She wiped her tears, despite how many kept continuing to fall freely.

“What? No, honey.” He came to her, kneeling in front of her again. He framed her face with his hands and hated the feel of her trembling against his touch. “I’m fine. There’s nothing wrong with me. I promise.”

“Then what is this? And why does it say,” she looked back down at the paper again, “patient had potentially dangerous levels in blood?”

“Sara, I knew that there was something wrong this morning. I was groggy, and I couldn’t comprehend what in the hell had happened. I had no memory of how I woke up the way I did.” He brushed his hands through the back of her hair and massaged her neck. “Shh. Don’t cry, honey. Let me explain. I never would have, never could have cheated on you. I love you too much to ever do that to either of us.”

Mitch took a breath before continuing, “After you left, some revelations came to light. Long story short, Claudia has done some very bad things to many people that we work with. Donna being one of them. She was used to Claudia’s manipulations, she was able to put some things together, and after having some blood work drawn up, it was determined that she put two sleeping pills in my coffee last night. The last thing I remember was eating the sandwich you brought for me. I never touched her, honey. I swear to you. Look at the report. It would have been virtually impossible for me to do anything. I was out cold.”

“But why? Why would anyone?” She asked.

“Because she’s a sick and twisted person. I want you to know that I pressed charges. They found the package from the pills in her purse, and she was arrested earlier today for drugging me, as well as blackmail, but that’s another story for another time.” He rubbed his hands up and down her arms, trying to chase her chills away.

“So you never? Oh, God, Mitch.” She flew into his arms and held on. “I’m so sorry I didn’t listen to you.” She drew back and looked at him. “I should have trusted you. I spent all day hurting so badly. And you probably have been miserable, and I was with Patrick when I should have been with you.” She didn’t miss the clench in his jaw that time. He still thought she had turned to Patrick. “Mitch, I need to explain about Patrick.”

Mitch shook his head. “No. Honey, listen. I love you, more than I can ever tell you. But I can’t listen to it. I forgive you. I will eventually forget. I won’t lie to you. It’s going to be hard. But I will find a way to get past it. I know you would have never turned to him if it wasn’t for the pain you were in.”

Sara seemed surprised by his declaration. “You’d forgive me?”

“Yes. I can’t lose you.”

She raised a hand and ran her fingers through her hair. “Mitch, you don’t understand. I was hurt, yes. But, no, I need to tell you the whole truth. I did ask Patrick to make love to me.” She took his hands and forced him to look back at her. “Mitch. I couldn’t, though. When he tried to touch me, I froze up. It was then, in that moment, that I knew I had to find you. I came here with the intention of forgiving you. I needed to give you another chance, for you as well as for me.”

“You couldn’t? You mean you didn’t?” Mitch waited for her answer while the air stopped flowing to and from his lungs.

She shook her head. “I told myself I wanted to, that I needed to. That it would make the pain go away. But, after mere seconds, I realized I would only cause more pain. I didn’t want him to touch me. Not like you do. I knew in that moment, that if I ever let anyone else touch me, I would be hurting myself as much as you.”

She leaned in and kissed him lightly. “I belong to you. All of me, my heart, body, and soul. I love you.”

Mitch returned her kiss as though they hadn’t been together in years. “Thank God. Oh, honey. I would have forgiven you. I swear, I would have made myself understand. But the thought that he had touched you.”

“He didn’t. It’s just you and me.” She assured him.

She was in awe of him. When she had been at Patrick’s, she had realized that in spite of the pain, she couldn’t live without him. She had come home with the intention of forgiving him for sleeping with Claudia. And now, he sat here and did the same for her.

Mitch stood up and swept her up, carrying her to the bedroom kissing her the whole time. When he gently laid her on the bed and hovered over her, she felt wetness splash against her cheek. She gazed up at him and saw tears in his eyes.

“Mitch, what’s wrong?” She kissed him, hating seeing him so vulnerable.

“I thought I lost you. My heart stopped beating, and my blood stopped pumping. I could never have survived if you hadn’t come back.”

Sara caressed his stubbly chin and cheeks. “Mitch, from this moment on, I will always come back to you. No matter where we are, what has happened, or how old we are. I swear to you, I will always come back to you.”

Breathless with urgency now, Sara pleaded with him. “Mitch, please now. I need to feel you inside of me.”

He looked down at her as he stayed positioned right at her entrance. “I love you, Sara. I will love you all of my life. But the next time I make love with you, I need to do it with promises made.”

She was flush with her arousal. She looked up at him confused. She grabbed onto his hips and tried to pull him closer. “Mitch, I don’t understand. I need you.”

“I need you, too, honey. More than I could ever explain. I need to know that you’ll marry me. I need to know that the next time you feel my hardness inside of you, that I am loving my future wife. Tell me you love me. Tell me you’ll marry me.” His words were pleading and patient both at the same time.

“Yes. I will marry you. Take me, Mitch, make me yours forever.” She reached up to kiss him and gasped at the feel of his deep thrust inside her.

He kissed her in return, releasing all of the lustful desire that had been fueled by the pain of what they had gone through that day. They caressed and loved each other’s bodies until they were on the brink, hovering between sanity and insanity.

Mitch rocked in and out of her body, loving the feel of her arching into him and the sound of her moans. “Yeah, you feel so good, honey. Oh, baby. We are going to have such a good life together.”

THE END

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