Stubborn Heart (23 page)

Mark crossed his arms and pushed back on the sofa, refusing to look at Derrick.

“Trevor loves you,” Derrick continued. “And you love him. Anyone can see that. But you keep him at arm’s length. He tries to get closer and you push him away. Why are so afraid to just give in, to let yourself commit?”

“It’s not that simple,” Mark protested.

“It is as simple, or as difficult, as you want to make it,” Derrick countered. “But you seem hell-bent on making it harder.”

“Stop it,” Mark pleaded, turning to look at Derrick. Tears flowed freely down his cheeks.

“No,” Derrick persisted. “You love Trevor. But you think that by refusing to acknowledge that love, it makes it less real. You think it keeps you safe because you spend every day waiting for Trevor to leave. You waste so much time and effort fighting what you feel that you can’t see it’s the best thing that has ever happened to either one of you.”

“What choice do I have?” Mark sobbed. “Trevor has to do what’s best for him. He isn’t even interested in the position in Atlanta. It seems obvious that he doesn’t want to stay here.”

“Have you asked him to stay?” Derrick asked, his voice now calm.

“How can I?” Mark responded with a shrug. “He deserves the chance to be happy. I don’t want to hold him back from following his dreams.”

“Fucking morons!” Derrick barked, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Enough with the names already,” Mark cried, fresh tears running down his face. “I am way too fragile right now for you to be calling me names.”

“You just don’t get it, Mark,” Derrick huffed. “
You
are his dream. That dumb ox doesn’t want anything more than to wake up with you in his bed for the rest of his life.”

“So why doesn’t he say that?” Mark asked, wiping his eyes with his palms.

“Because he doesn’t want to see you give up your dreams any more than you want to see him give up his,” Derrick explained as if talking to a child. “Neither one of you really talks to the other one about what’s important. You both assume you know what’s best for the other person. So here we are right back at what I first said. You two are behaving like idiots.” He smiled at Mark.

“How did you get to be so smart?” Mark asked quietly, rubbing his eyes again. A hint of a smile started to form on his own lips.

Derrick moved next to Mark on the sofa and pulled him into an embrace. “It’s pretty easy when I keep watching my two favorite people do all the wrong things for all the right reasons.”

“I love you, you know,” Mark said, holding on to Derrick.

Derrick squeezed Mark, then lightly cuffed the back of his head. “Yes. I do know. I also know that if you can say it to me, you can say it to him.”

“Message received.” Mark sniffed, pulling away from Derrick.

“Good,” Derrick replied, smiling as he stood up. “I’m going to be leaving now. Either fix this or burn the place down, because I don’t want to come back to this mess.” He leaned over and kissed Mark on the cheek, and then left the apartment.

M
ARK
took a deep breath and opened the door to Trevor’s room without knocking. Trevor sat on the floor beneath a window, his head resting on arms crossed over his knees. He looked up as the door clicked shut. His eyes were red and his face was wet with tears.

“Thank you for not leaving,” Trevor whispered, his words raspy as he spoke. “I’m sorry about what I said.”

“I’m sorry too,” Mark said. He walked over and knelt on the floor in front of Trevor. He rested on his knees, one on either side of Trevor’s legs. He wrapped his arms around Trevor’s shoulders and leaned in. He kissed away the tears from Trevor’s face. “I’ve been told that sometimes I act like an idiot.” He chuckled as he remembered Derrick’s words.

Trevor cupped Mark’s face in both hands. He placed one soft kiss on Mark’s lips. Mark swallowed as he looked into the eyes of this beautiful man. Trevor said nothing, but the raw emotion in his eyes almost took Mark’s breath away.

“I love you,” Mark whispered.

Trevor’s eyes widened with surprise. “That’s the first time you ever said that to me.”

Mark blushed and looked down. When he looked back up, there were tears in his eyes. His voice cracked. “I’m sorry about that too.”

“No more apologies, Mark.” Trevor lowered his knees and eased Mark into his lap. He lightly kissed each eyelid, brushed away the tears, and then moved to Mark’s lips.

Mark moaned as Trevor’s tongue sought out his. He wrapped his legs around Trevor’s waist. He felt strong hands underneath his buttocks, pulling him closer to the bigger man.

“Naked. Now,” Trevor gasped between kisses. He stood, lifting Mark with him. Mark unlocked his legs and lowered his feet to the floor. Trevor ran his hands under Mark’s shirt, pinching both nipples between his thumbs and index fingers.

Mark groaned and bit down lightly on Trevor’s lower lip, and then sucked it into his mouth. He broke off the kiss long enough to tug Trevor’s shirt over his head. Trevor’s mouth descended upon his, claiming it for his own. Mark moaned as he ran his hands across the firm muscles of Trevor’s chest and abdomen, plowing trails through the dense hair. He reached down to unbutton Trevor’s jeans.

“Wait,” Trevor whispered. He gently pushed Mark’s hands away. He reached down and unfastened Mark’s pants and slowly lowered the zipper. Trevor placed his thumbs in either side of Mark’s jeans and pushed them down to his ankles. As he knelt, he took Mark’s rock-hard penis into his mouth and buried his face in the soft mound of pubic hair at the base. Trevor looked up at Mark’s face as he pulled back and then took his cock in again, tip to base.

“Trevor,” Mark moaned as he began moving his hips to match Trevor’s rhythm. The sight of his cock sliding in and out of his lover’s mouth was driving him crazy. He knew he wouldn’t last long.

As if sensing his thoughts, Trevor released Mark’s cock and grinned. “Not so fast, baby,” he teased. “You don’t get off that easily.”

Trevor stood and guided Mark until he was seated on the bed. He pulled off Mark’s shoes, pants, and socks. His movements were slow and methodical.

Mark yanked off his shirt and tossed it on the floor. “There, I’m naked!” he growled. “Take off those fucking clothes now.”

Trevor chuckled at the frustration and need in Mark’s voice, but he did as he was told. He toed off each shoe and then slipped out of his jeans and underwear.

Mark reached and grabbed Trevor’s heavy cock as it finally swung free. He jacked it a few times with one hand as he rubbed the other over Trevor’s hairy stomach. Pulling him closer, Mark licked at the slit of Trevor’s engorged member. “You taste so good,” he groaned as he savored the salty sweetness of the precum. He wrapped his lips around the plum-colored head, slowly pumping Trevor’s shaft. Mark tugged at Trevor’s scrotum as he felt the balls start to climb upward in the sac.

“Okay. That’s probably all I can take right now,” Trevor said huskily. He pulled Mark up to stand and then crushed his lips onto Mark’s.

Mark whimpered as Trevor pushed his tongue through his lips, demanding entrance. He opened his mouth and surrendered completely.

“Wait. Wait a minute.” Trevor broke away, his chest heaving from excitement and exertion. He reached into the nightstand and retrieved a condom and bottle of lube. He sat on the side of the bed, tore open the package, and removed the condom. He opened the lube and poured a small amount onto Mark’s cock.

“What are you doing?” Mark gasped, moving back in surprise.

“This will increase your sensitivity,” Trevor said roughly. He smoothed the liquid over the head of Mark’s penis.

“I know what lube does,” Mark said, still confused. “I just don’t understand what you’re up to.”

“I want you, Mark. Want you inside me.” He looked up into Mark’s eyes, hungry and demanding.

“But you said you’ve never done this before,” Mark said, and then he shook his head as he realized Trevor’s intentions. “You don’t have to do this.”

“I
want
to do this for you. I want to give myself completely to you,” Trevor said with certainty. He lovingly rolled the condom over Mark’s shaft. He rested back on the bed and positioned Mark on top of him.

Mark kissed his way from Trevor’s mouth to his neck. He worked his hands over the hard, round muscles of Trevor’s chest. Moving down Trevor’s body, Mark replaced his hands with his mouth. First he bit and then licked each of Trevor’s rock-hard nipples.

Trevor moaned and writhed on the bed, each new sensation making him crazier. He hooked his legs around Mark’s calves and then rubbed his heels up and down Mark’s legs. He worked his hands over Mark’s back as far as he could reach. Anything just to pull Mark closer. To feel more of Mark touching him, taking him, making him his own.

Mark continued his downward trek, exploring every inch of his lover with his mouth and hands. He swirled his tongue around Trevor’s navel. Everywhere Mark’s mouth moved, his tongue left wet trails in the soft ginger hair.

“Mark!” Trevor hissed in surprise as Mark rubbed a slightly razor-stubbled chin down the length of his cock. Trevor’s cock jumped in response to the new sensation. Mark grinned and ran his chin back up Trevor’s penis before taking it in his mouth. Trevor ground his buttocks into the mattress as Mark slowly bobbed up and down.

Mark released Trevor’s cock and it slapped against his abdomen, leaving a wet trail as it sprang back up. Mark reached down and lifted Trevor’s scrotum. He licked and then sucked each ball into his mouth, rolling them around on his tongue. He ran his fingers underneath Trevor’s ball sac and then traced his way back to the hairy hole. Trevor groaned as Mark massaged around the opening.

“It might be easier if you were on your knees,” Mark suggested. He worked one hand up and down Trevor’s cock while he used the fingers of his other hand to play at the muscle of his lover’s opening.

“No,” Trevor said huskily. “I want to see your face when you take me.”

Mark leaned up and kissed Trevor’s lips. He guided Trevor’s legs up to provide him better access. He popped open the bottle of lube and poured a large amount onto the crease of Trevor’s ass.

“I don’t think you’ll need quite that much.” Trevor snickered as he felt the liquid running down his crease and ass cheeks.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Mark answered as he placed the bottle on the nightstand. He had a nervous grin on his face and uncertainty in his eyes.

“You won’t hurt me.” Trevor reached behind his knees to pull his legs up higher. Mark wrapped one hand around Trevor’s cock and gently squeezed the big muscle. Slowly he worked his hand up and down the shaft. He swirled the index finger of his other hand around in the lube before carefully pressing it into the tight pucker of Trevor’s hole.

Trevor sucked in a breath as Mark pushed his finger past the outer ring. Mark looked up at him, and he nodded his approval. Mark pushed until his second knuckle slid through. Ever so gently, he pulled back and pushed forward several times. As he felt Trevor start to loosen up, he added a second finger, then a third. Mark worked the fingers in and out, gradually increasing his speed.

“Now, baby,” Trevor panted as Mark continued to finger-fuck him with one hand and work his cock with the other. Trevor’s eyes were half closed as he focused only on the sensations his body was feeling.

Mark nodded and pulled out his fingers. He massaged lube over his condom-covered cock and placed the head at Trevor’s entrance. Mark leaned over to kiss his lover’s lips. As his lips ravaged Trevor’s mouth, he eased his cock into Trevor’s hole. Trevor gasped as the head of Mark’s penis pushed past his outer ring.

Mark stopped and looked down at Trevor questioningly. Trevor took in a deep breath and shifted his hips so he could free up his hands. He pulled Mark’s face back to his and kissed him. Slowly, Mark eased forward until his balls rested against Trevor’s ass.

“You feel like a furnace inside, Trev,” Mark whispered. He held still to give Trevor a chance to relax and get used to having Mark inside him.

“So full of you,” Trevor panted in reply. “Let me feel you move.”

Gingerly, Mark eased himself back until he had almost completely withdrawn from Trevor. Then he pressed forward. He repeated the movements several times, deliberately, watching to judge Trevor’s response. Trevor said nothing but his face was red. Mark watched as a bead of sweat ran down Trevor’s forehead.

“Trev. Baby. We can stop,” Mark offered.

“No,” Trevor protested, taking in a deep breath.

“I have an idea,” Mark said. He lifted Trevor’s legs and rested his meaty calves against his chest. He pulled his penis almost completely out and then quickly pushed in to the hilt. The change in trajectory pushed the head of his cock right over Trevor’s prostate.

“Fuck!” Trevor yelled, eyes wide open in surprise. “What was that?”

“That is what it feels like to have your prostate nailed,” Mark said with a grin. He kissed Trevor’s leg and pulled back again. He pushed forward, feeling the familiar bump as he glided over Trevor’s prostate.

“Hell, yes,” Trevor moaned in pleasure as Mark thrust in and out.

Mark slowly increased his pace. Trevor closed his eyes and bit down on his lower lip. His nostrils flared as he breathed through his nose. He opened his eyes again to look at Mark.

“You look amazing.” Mark met Trevor’s gaze. He kissed Trevor’s ankles where he held them in place as he thrust his cock in and out of Trevor’s tight hole.

“I’m all yours, Mark, only yours,” Trevor murmured through lust-clouded eyes. “Do what you want to me.”

Mark looked down at Trevor’s twitching cock. The assault on Trevor’s prostate gland had resulted in a continuous oozing of precum. It formed a small pool on Trevor’s stomach.

“Look, baby,” Mark coaxed. He reached down and placed the tip of his index finger into Trevor’s navel, coating it with the liquid. As Trevor watched, he brought it up to his lips. Mark sucked at the finger, grinning at Trevor as he did.

“Fuck me!” Trevor hissed through clenched teeth as he stared in amazement. “Are you trying to kill me?”

“I think you can take a little more.” Mark chuckled.