Sound Advice (Sensations Collection #1) (26 page)

“And…I couldn’t take your silence.” He paused. “I can handle Katie’s. I’ve had years to get used to it. But you…your silence is deafening and maddening. I don’t know what you’re thinking or feeling unless I can see you, and I wasn’t seeing you.”

I remained quiet.

“I couldn’t think of excuses to stop by, and I didn’t want to play the dad card, using Katie for an excuse. Although based on how tonight has gone I didn’t do her any favors by keeping her away, and she doesn’t say anything so I didn’t know how she felt. I didn’t know that she missed you so much. And then you show up with George.”

He growled the last statement as we reached Nana’s house and stood at the base of the front steps. Jess rubbed his hand down his face, and I looked in the direction of the Carpenter’s home. There was only a front light on in the first floor window. I hadn’t even thought of George after I walked away from the curb outside the ice cream shop.

“I’m sorry if I ruined your date,” Jess said quietly.

“Oh, it wasn’t a date. George is a nice man. Awkward at times, but kind.”

Jess didn’t respond and put his hands in his front pockets. The silence was a slow burning ember, and I was going to spontaneously combust from the desire to kiss him like he’d kissed me only a few moments ago in his room.

“And what about you Jess?”

“What about me?”

“You said Katie missed me, but what about you? You slept with me then never came back. You kissed me then left with another woman. You danced with me in public then almost got into a fight.” I didn’t know where the rising temper was coming from because I wasn’t really mad at Jess. Just…frustrated.

“I’ve missed you, too,” his voice low as he looked at me.

“Stay,” I said and I couldn’t believe how breathy the word sounded.

“Um…after that kiss, I don’t know. I don’t know…if…I could stop myself.”

“You could,” I paused. “You have,” I whispered. I waited a heartbeat before I spoke again.

“
Sleep
with me?” I whispered again, almost begging, but I directed my gaze to the ground. When Jess didn’t answer, I knew I couldn’t look up and take his rejection again. I was already embarrassed enough at being caught by his mother, of all people, giving into his kiss, and now practically begging him to stay when he clearly didn’t want to. I turned to walk up the steps and he encircled my upper arm with his fingers. I stopped with one foot on the step.

Jess moved his hand to cup my chin and forced my gaze upward.

“Don’t hide from me.”

The night was dark and with no lights on in Nana’s house or on the front porch it was hard to see his eyes or his jawline.

“I want to stay, if you’ll have me. You just have to promise to stop me before I go too far, okay?”

I nodded my head that was still clasped in his hand before I continued up the stairs. I entered the house and locked the door after Jess, then led him up the stairs without saying a word. I went into my room and Jess followed silently. When I turned around to face him, he approached me slowly, like a predator stalking its prey. I was frozen and he rubbed his hands up and down my arms. I noticed again his changed t-shirt.

“Why did you change your shirt?”

“Because, I…well, I…didn’t want you to have to touch me where Sammie tried to touch me.”

“She was pawing at you. I should apologize. Maybe I ruined your date.”

“Don’t do this,” he whispered as he stepped closer. He rubbed his nose behind my ear and let his cheeks graze upon my jaw. “You weren’t touching me back in my room, and I thought the t-shirt was the problem.” I swallowed hard before I answered.

“You kind of took me by surprise. But also, I think I knew if I touched the shirt, I’d probably rip it off of you.”

His mouth was on mine, devouring me again. Kissing. Kissing me hard. Licking my lip, sucking the bottom, and nibbling my mouth. He kissed me lighter and moved to my jaw, then my neck and toward my shoulder.

“You smell like Superman ice cream,” he laughed softly into my neck.

“Katie was a little sticky.”

In one swift move, he had my shirt over my head and thrown on the floor. I physically shivered and he rubbed up my bared arms, around my shoulder blades, and across the top of my back. He wasn’t trying to remove my bra, but he was softly touching every other part of me. I was pressing against him, hoping my body was telling him that he could touch me anywhere.

I grabbed the hem of his t-shirt and slowly tugged it upward. He pulled back only slightly and reached behind his head to pull the shirt off in one smooth move that only guys can do. I immediately placed my hands on his lower abs, spreading my palms flat and fingers wide as I rubbed across his stomach above his waistband, and then pressed upward until I touched his shoulders. He was taller than me and I reached up to run my hands over his shoulders and back down the muscles of his arms. When I looked at his face, his eyes were closed.

I leaned into him, touching my covered breasts against his bare chest and he sighed as he reached for me, kissing me again without ever opening his eyes. He bent forward and picked me up under the knees. Carrying me to the bed, he placed me on top of the cover. He kicked off his shoes as I reached to pull the covers down. He knelt on the bed to crawl to me and again he had that dangerous look of a predator and I was held in trance until he was over me.

Then I was the one on the attack. I touched his chest again and moaned while looking into his eyes. His mouth found mine and my arms went around him. His warmth was surrounding me as his hand slid across my stomach to my hip, down my thigh to hitch my leg up and over his hip. The position gave him a better angle to match us up so we were pressed against each critical part of the other. His hand then slid up to cup my breast and I moaned audibly, filling the quiet room with my desire. My nipples hardened as he gently squeezed and I sighed again. The flittering feeling between my legs was strong and I pressed against him hard. Slowly I began to move back and forth against him.

He placed his hand back on my hip bone to still me.

“Tell me what you want.”

“I…I need….”

“What do you need?”

I couldn’t say it. I just couldn’t tell him what to do.

“If you don’t tell me what you want, how do I know what you need?” I pressed into him harder, hoping my actions conveyed my desire. I knew I was growing wet down there and I hoped this action was hint enough.

“Say it,” he said gently as he kissed me once. I shook my head no. I couldn’t ask him.

“Say it,” he hesitated on the word ‘it’. He kissed me again.

“Say it,” he growled into my mouth. “I need to hear the words.”

“Touch me. Please.”

He slipped his hand back up to my breast.

“Here?”

“Yes.”
Where was the harlot sound coming from?

“Really?”

“Yes.” But I ground against him again.

“Liar.”

He slipped his hand down to my shorts, slipping a finger into the waistband, sliding it teasingly back and forth along my stomach. I was still pressed around him with my leg over his hip and he pushed upwards with his hips once. I gasped. He placed his fingers in my short’s pocket and gently pulled me forward, pushing up against me again. I sucked in air again. He slid his fingers to the hem of my shorts and traced the top of my thigh, heading toward my center, just inside the edge of my shorts. He stopped his torturous fingers and pushed against me again. I gasped a third time as his fingers moved the short distance inside my shorts and gently touched my now soaked panties. He moaned.

“You want me.” His voice was a smile.

“Now,” I demanded.

He rubbed his long finger against my wet middle hard then pushed himself upward against me and I fell apart. He held himself in place, pressed firmly to me, through jeans, through shorts, as I rode out the wave of my pleasure. My leg was wrapped around his hip and up his lower back, squeezing him in place and his hand was gripping my thigh firmly, holding me still.

“Oh, God,” I moaned and dug my nails gently into his shoulders. He returned to kissing me as he gently pulled back, softly rubbed his hand up and down my thigh, then moved his hand slowly back up my body. He traveled over my breasts but didn’t stop until his hand was in my hair at the base of my neck. The kissing was slowing down. He was gentle. Small pecks on my lips moved over to my cheeks, then each eyelid, and finally my forehead. He pulled back further and looked into my eyes. I was so satisfied at the moment and my eyelids were slowly closing. He kissed each one again and whispered
,
“Sleep.”

It is polite to accept a beverage when offered by a hostess, and sit for a few moments to sip tea or coffee. A social call should never be rushed.

“Matters of Manners,” 1959

I AWOKE WITH a jolt as Jess sprang from the bed. The room was filled with bright sunlight in the early morning and I looked at the digital alarm clock. 7:48 a.m.

“Shit, I’m so late,” Jess said as he searched the floor for his abandoned t-shirt and pulled it over his head. I smoothed my hair back and realized I was still dressed in my bra and shorts. I crossed one arm over myself, resting my hand on the opposite shoulder as a form of cover. Jess stopped in his scramble to fix his own disheveled long hair. His gaze was bright blue, a look I’d rarely seen and he knelt on the edge of the bed, reached for the hand that was covering me, and turned my palm face up. He traced the letters I.D.O.N.T.H.A.T.E.Y.O.U. delicately on the inside of my hand then smiled that lopsided smile before leaning forward to swiftly kiss me. He hastily walked out the door. A moment later, he leaned back in on the doorframe.

“I’m sorry. I sleep so well with you. But I really gotta go.”
Talk to you later
, he signed.

AFTER TWO hours, I could hardly sit still any longer. I was high on the physical sensation of last night, emotionally wound up by Jess’ words, and stressed over Katie’s signed
I love you
. I was even more concerned than before that I was in too deep with Katie, which would make leaving all the harder to explain. But I was not Katie’s mother, and despite Jess’ physical attraction to me, his words played over and over in my head.
Don’t love her.
I believed love was not something you could stop and start on command. Plus, I was having trouble not falling in love with Jess as well.

I decided to pay a visit to Katie, knowing Jess might not be home. I also felt I might need to apologize to Mrs. Carter. After cutting some flowers from the garden, I walked the four short blocks to their family home. When Mrs. Carter answered the door, she cheerfully invited me in before telling me that Jess and Katie were both out.

“Well, these are for you,” I handed her the flowers. “I feel I owe you an apology for my behavior last night.”

“Oh honey,” she laughed, “You aren’t teenagers. Although, by the looks of it last night, you might as well be.” She offered me homemade ice tea as she poured water in a clear drinking glass for the flowers. Then she asked me to sit at the kitchen table when the ice tea was served. I got a good look at Mrs. Carter for the first time. At the concert, I was concentrating on Nana. At Tom’s party, it was darker and most conversations happened in shadows, not to mention I was too busy concentrating on Jess. But today, I saw how young she looked. She looked younger than Sue Carpenter, despite having boys the same age. She was a fuller woman and tall like Jess and Tom. They shared the same blue eyes, but hers were duller, like Tom’s, compared to the blue-grey intensity of Jess’ and Katie’s. I had no idea what Katie’s mother looked like, but it would be obvious if Mrs. Carter, Jess, and Katie were together that they were related.

“I’m going to be honest, because that’s what I want you to be with my son. You’re going to break his heart…” She held up her hand, sensing that I would interrupt her and I stared down at my clenched hands, folding and unfolding on my lap.

“But, on the other hand, I haven’t seen that boy so excited about anyone in a long time, and it does me good to see him opening up a little.” She smiled to herself before she redirected her attention on me.