Seer: Thrall (36 page)

I knew I was making her smile. "I'd go to please you. I'd find ways to enjoy it. I would rather you didn't ask to go on cruises or saltwater sailing. If you have your heart set on those, I'd suggest you take Dolores or Amanda."

"How did you get to the new world?"

"Sailing vessel. It was a miserable crossing, and that probably has a great deal to do with why I dislike the ocean. I dislike the waves. I dislike the smell. I dislike everything about it."

"You like seafood."

"Yeah, but don't ask me to help you catch any."

She finished my leg. It had been very sensuous, and I'd enjoyed it immensely. And she didn't cut me.

"That was nice," I said, opening my eyes. She was smiling while looking at my leg.

"Switch," she said. "I'll do the other."

I thought about making her go digging for it, but I was relaxed again and didn't want a tussle. I slipped one leg under the water then crossed legs to offer the other. That involved a little shifting around in the tub, and it wasn't quite as comfortable. I'd survive.

"This is so odd," I said.

"Having me shave your legs?"

"No. Well, yes, but that's not it exactly. The attention. You're an ancient creature. You're a high powered lawyer. And you're lavishing me with this attention."

"Look at me," she ordered, and I was helpless but to obey. "To be clear, you are important to me, Sidney. I enjoy this at least as much as you do. I spent a great many decades being utterly selfish, demanding my ...um...."

"Partners?"

"Sure," she said. "Demanding my partners worship me. It took a long, long time for me to realize something."

"What?"

"Being worshipped didn't make me happy. It didn't make me feel good. What makes me feel good is finding someone worthy of my attention."

I closed my eyes. "I think you're lying. This feels damned good, and I bet you'd say the same thing if you were in the tub."

"Of course it feels good, and of course I'd enjoy it. Please tell me you understand what I tried to say."

I nodded. "I understood. But you understand that I will always have self esteem issues. I'm the kid who grew up without any parents, the kid no one wanted. I've been away from that for 28 years, but I'll never stop being that person."

"Then I am going to ask for a very, very large favor from you, Sidney."

I opened my eyes again. She was just finishing my leg, and she lowered it into the water for me before telling me of the favor she wanted. She set the cream and razor aside then took my hands. "I understand you think you are that person. I understand why you think you are that person. I also understand why you think you will always be that person. But I want you to rephrase in your head how you see it."

"Oh?"

"Maybe instead you can say, It will be very difficult to stop seeing yourself that way, and it might take a very long time. But a very long time is not forever."

My heart skipped. I knew what she was saying. I nodded. "I'll try."

"Thank you." She smiled. "Do you want me to wash your hair?"

"No, but if I'm this comfortable with you after the bike ride, I might let you wash it then."

She grinned.

* * * *

We rode just under forty miles, but we rode hard, and I was exhausted when we finished. It felt good; it felt amazingly good.

I asked Solange to set the pace and told her, "Eighteen miles an hour."

I had never in my life maintained eighteen for more than a few miles. Solange knew it, too, but she didn't even question my judgment, and we kept that eighteen the entire trip, with of course variances for wind and hills. I rode in her slipstream, so I had an easier time than if I'd been alone, but it was still a serious, serious ride for me.

It left me with a natural high. I admitted that to Solange then asked playfully, "Going to shower with me and wash my hair?"

She studied me for a moment then said, "You know, I don't think I should. Do you understand?"

"Sure. You're afraid I'll crash and then accuse you of taking advantage."

And so after putting the bikes away, we headed in opposite directions with the agreement to meet in twenty minutes down at the tiki bar.

By the time I got there, Solange had already loaded the boat. We had food, a variety of drinks, and spare blankets and jackets in case it got cold. I had already pulled on a fall jacket, but I had to admit it could get cold out on the water.

I waited until we were well out, idling along, before I asked, "Will my athletic improvements continue?"

"If you keep working and drinking my blood, yes," she said.

"I'm forty-six."

"I'm eight hundred and seventy one," she countered. "You aren't remotely old."

"I missed your eight hundred and seventieth birthday! I'm so sorry."

She laughed. "I stopped celebrating a long, long time ago."

"How long ago?"

"About eight hundred and fifty years." She paused. "Sidney, that information is private. Cadence and Aubree know how old I am. Others might be able to guess. But you must never tell anyone."

I nodded.

"Seriously," she said, "If you drink regularly, your apparent age will continue to regress. You could look twenty-five two years from now, if you drank daily."

"I don't want to look twenty-five," I said.

"Even without my blood, you're exercising harder, longer and more often than you did when we met. I bet you were improving at your old rate of exercise. You would continue to improve at this new rate."

"Age would catch up."

"Before, eventually. But now, not anymore, or at least not for a long time."

I shook my head. "I don't know what to consider 'normal' anymore. I don't know what achievements to feel proud about."

"You should feel proud about all of them. Sure, my blood helps, but it's still you pedaling that bike, not me. I'm not pushing you."

"I'm drafting behind you."

"You don't draft when you do other rides?"

"Well, I do, I guess, but I take my share of the lead, too."

She shrugged. "You couldn't have worked harder than you did today. If you had led, you would have gotten worn out faster. We would have quit sooner or ridden slower. If you're putting everything you have into it, what does it matter? The speed today felt good, didn't it?"

"Oh god, did it ever!" I said. "But-"

"But nothing," she said. "I didn't used to pay attention, but once we started biking, I did my own research. Guys like Lance Armstrong didn't ride out in front. He always had an entire team helping him. The most you get is Aubree and I."

"And both Lance and I are on performance enhancing drugs." I said it with a smirk.

"Does that bother you?" she asked.

"It would if I were competing, as it would be cheating," I said. "I just wish I knew how much was me, and how much is your blood."

"They are all just numbers," she replied. "You should think about what's important."

"Which is?"

"Did you feel good? Did you have a good time? Are you improving? Do you want to keep riding?"

"Yes to all those." I paused. "You're right." I smiled. "What's for dinner?"

For the next ten days, Solange tried to induce other dreams in me. She wanted to know of vampire plots to either expose the vampires to all humans or other plots to eliminate dissenting voices. She also wanted to know about human discoveries by people whose voices might not be easily silenced. Her efforts resulted in a few dreams, but nothing of consequence. We couldn't decide if that meant she wasn't being sufficiently specific in what she was asking for or if there just wasn't anything to discover.

So we tried an experiment. After our discussion about professional athletes engaged in cheating, she spent a few nights urging me to dream about specifics. The first two nights didn't accomplish anything, but on the third night, I spent a long night with dream after dream of a wide variety of athletes engages in a variety of ways to cheat. When I finally woke from that, Solange was long gone, and I was a wreck. I found her and begged her to help me sleep without any more dreams.

I apologized I wasn't helping with the war.

"Maybe you are," she said. "Bistra is as much a threat as anyone. If humanity were going to rise against the vampires, it would because of the monsters like her."

"But I haven't had any dreams of humans acting against her."

"Maybe that's because our efforts resolve the problem before humans get involved as anything beyond her victims."

"Maybe."

* * * *

In the meantime, my life continued to improve, recovering from events of the last year. It was mid-October and I still had a few more weeks of bike riding before November arrived. I continued to bike very well and was exceedingly pleased, but I didn't have any more remarkable new milestones. Solange and I agreed, even with her blood, I was probably near the peak I could expect unless I became serious about training. And frankly, I liked how I looked and felt. And so we made sure my exercise included other activities, especially swimming and time in the gym.

I increased my work schedule to about half time. This was significantly under the sixty or more hours I used to bill each week, and I hadn't decided how I felt about that. But I found myself looking forward to Solange coming home every day for lunch and the two of us spending our afternoons together.

I had to wonder what Star would say if she saw me now. She had left me because I wouldn't do for her what I was doing with Solange. I had to wonder if she had been right all along, and I shouldn't have put my career ahead of her.

But this situation had been thrust upon me, and I hadn't decided whether I was going to accept it or return to my old patterns. For now, I continued to edge back into work.

Things with Solange remained, well, weird. My moods concerning her fluctuated, which annoyed me to no end. If I could remain angry, then I would know where we stood. If I could forgive her, then I also had a good idea where we stood.

If she grew frustrated with me, she didn't show it. If I turned too irritable, I found her fingers in my mouth, drops of blood coating my tongue and calming me down immediately.

I found it an exceedingly effective way to stop an unfair fight, but on the other hand, it was heavy handed. And I hated how easy it was for her to control my mood.

Once a month cards looked to be turning into every Saturday cards with two tables some weeks, three on others, and it was threatening to turn into four tables. I was not an extreme extrovert. I preferred intimate gatherings of four to six people. I had tolerated eight because that made for two tables. I kept my concerns to myself, as I didn't want to make anyone feel unwelcome, but I wasn't looking forward to the next full-sized card party.

It was the first time in my life I wasn't excited about one of my own parties.

It was my own fault, of course. I'm the one who kept inviting people. I'm the one who didn't want to exclude anyone.

Well, I would just have to accept help. I still wasn't accustomed to that idea. And in the scheme of things, having a few too many people to a party was a pretty small issue to waste worry time over.

But before most of that, Solange took me riding.

* * * *

Sitting in her car, I looked down at how I was dressed. "I can't believe you bought all this for me on the off chance I'll like it."

"You know me, Sidney," she said. "I choose to act as if the outcome I want is inevitable. And it's not like I bought a string of horses. I only bought us some clothing. You look really nice."

I had to agree with her. We were dressed in very similar styles, and we looked good, really good. It started with white riding breeches. They were form fitting and tucked into the brown leather boots we each wore. We also each wore a white shirt with high, tight collar. Waiting in the back seat were a couple of jackets. Mine was blue and Solange's was a deep claret. She also had helmets for both of us.

"I don't believe you play polo in these clothes."

"Not competitively," she admitted. "You'd wear a jersey with your number on the back. But we're just going riding."

We didn't have that long a drive. Solange had found a ranch only eight miles further west from her house. She hadn't answered my questions except to assure me they had a gentle horse for me. I was nervous anyway. But it wasn't long before we drove past a large field bordered by an attractive wooden fence. We turned right onto a dirt lane, passing through a gate, and drove into the lot, parking amongst another half dozen cars. My heart rate increased, and my palms were sweating.

Solange turned to me. "Sidney, I promise you'll have a good time. Please trust me."

I thought about it then nodded.

"What if I fall?"

"You won't."

"What if I can't control the horse?"

"Honey. What if you have a nice time?"

"Then you'll make me play polo."

"Honey." Her expression was full of concern. "I'm not going to make you do anything. And even if you were going to play, you wouldn't go from riding a gentle horse today to riding all over the field tomorrow, swinging a mallet."

"I'm being silly."

"Perhaps not silly," she said. "Okay, maybe a little silly. The horses are very gentle, and you're going to love this."

I thought about it and nodded. A moment later, we climbed from the car. Solange helped me into my jacket then collected our helmets and riding gloves. She gestured, and we stepped towards a stable entrance with a sign over it declaring it, "Entrance". I held the door, and once inside, we looked around.

To the right of the door was a sort of receptionist's desk and beyond it, the open door to an office. If we'd gone straight ahead, we would have traveled between the doors leading to what I assumed were horse stalls. I didn't see any horse's looking out, but I presumed there were horses somewhere.

No one was in sight.

"Hello," Solange called out.

"Be right with you," came a reply from one of the stalls.

I took the delay as additional opportunity to look around, turning a full circle. To the left of the entrance, opposite the reception desk, was a modest sales area. On display were a variety of equestrian products. I headed that way, and Solange shadowed me.

While the sales area was small, it was tightly packed. There was a rack with a variety of saddles and, beside it, bridles, halters, and other things I didn't recognize. I saw a few helmets similar to the ones Solange was carrying, but these had face guards. I also saw something that looked like really tall croquet mallets.

"That's what you hit the ball with?"

"Yes," Solange confirmed.

They had a few jerseys with the name of the ranch -- Forester Stables -- as well as a beautiful, green cotton riding jacket with the stable name emblazoned over the pocket.

"Hello." Solange and I turned around, and a woman was standing behind us, watching us. She appeared to be my age, mid-forties, fit, and dressed in riding clothes that were far more casual than what Solange had bought for us. "Shopping, or are you here for riding? Perhaps a lesson?" She looked us up and down, but I saw no judgment in her eyes.

Solange handed one of the helmets to me then stepped forward with her now unencumbered hand extended. "I am Solange Casper. I called on Friday."

"Ah, Solange," said the woman. "Yes. You spoke to Jen." The two shook hands. "Jen told me you have riding experience."

"In my younger years," Solange admitted. "Sidney is new to riding, however."

I stepped forward to shake the woman's hand.

"Yes, so Jen said. She wanted to take you out herself, but we had a bit of a staffing emergency, and she is working with a group of our younger students instead. I'm Dina, Jen's partner. I'll be seeing to you today instead. I was just saddling your horses. Perhaps we should start with a little tour."

She led us to the receptionist desk. Against the wall was a map. Dina gestured. "We own one section of land." In Minnesota, a section was typically a square mile surrounded by country roads. "We also have an agreement with Benson riding, and we share our riding trails." I looked at the map and realized there was no road passing between Forester land and Benson land. "About half our land is wooded with trails weaving through them. We have short loops that take about forty minutes and remain entirely on our land or there are longer loops that pass into Benson land. We don't typically do pure trail rides here; we are a riding school. But you explained to Jen you used to play polo."

"Yes," Solange said. "I haven't played in many years."

"You have an unusual name," Dina observed.

"My family is from France," Solange replied.

"It was before my time, but my mother once knew of a woman who played polo. Back then, she had to disguise herself as a man, as polo was not yet a woman's place. Her name was Solange."

Solange smiled. "My great-aunt. It was she who taught me to ride when I was young. I am named after her, and so I became her favorite."

I admired how easily Solange handled the question. I decided I'd ask her whether it bothered her to hide who she was. I thought perhaps it did, but she didn't let it show while we stood, talking to Dina.

Dina nodded. "I bet you have stories."

"Perhaps a few," Solange admitted. "Aunt Solange loved to ride."

Dina went on to talk about the facilities. They had more stables and several paddocks for the horses. They had four fields for polo as well as other spaces for barrel riding and other forms of horsemanship. I didn't understand most of it, but I was impressed nevertheless.

It was clear she was doing a sales job to Solange. That became clearer when she said, almost casually, "Jen said you were thinking of buying a few ponies. What did you have in mind?"

"Nothing serious," Solange said. "Today, I just want to introduce Sidney to something that has been important to my family."

Everything clicked. Right there, everything clicked. This was important to her. My heart began pounding even harder, worried that I was about to disappoint her.

But I had never failed anything I set my mind to, and I wasn't going to fail this.

"I'd like to see a game," I said suddenly.

They both turned to me, and I saw the corners of Solange's lips turn upwards.

"I'm sorry," said Dina. "We don't have any games scheduled today." She turned to Solange. "Do you remember how to ride?"

"I think I do," Solange said, and I recognized the challenge in her voice.

Dina gestured with her head. "Come on." She turned and led us deeper into the stable. As we went past the stalls, I saw a few horses, but most of the stalls were empty.

"Where are the horses?" I asked.

"This is the small stable," Dina explained. "These are the horses that are going to be ridden today. We have two other stables that are much larger, and in good weather, we let most of them out into the paddocks, anyway. We don't have any troublesome horses here."

We left through a large door at the end of the stable. We found ourselves in the middle of a lane. To the left was a paddock with a number of horses in a variety of colors, although brown seemed dominant. To the right was an empty field with a small set of stands for bystanders.

"This is our main polo field," Dina said. "We have three more, one sized for arena polo. The entrance to the riding trails is down this lane and around the far side of the field." She gestured. "You can just see where the trail disappears into the trees." She gestured again, this time to the left. "And you can see the largest of our stables past these paddocks."

I looked around then walked up to the fence leading to the paddock. Solange and Dina stepped up beside me, and then both Dina and Solange half climbed the fence, coming to a rest at the top with one leg thrown over the fence. I emulated them.

"Are these polo horses?"

"Polo ponies," Dina corrected. "A few." She pointed to several of the horses, offering their names. I wasn't sure which ones she meant. Then she whistled, and several of the horses turned their heads in our direction. After a moment, three of them began to trot towards us. As they grew closer, I almost jumped back off the fence, but neither Solange nor Dina seemed remotely nervous, so I held my ground. The three horses came to a stop in front of Dina, nosing her insistently and trying to nudge each other out of the way.