Saving Sara (Redemption #1) (23 page)

39.

S
ara spent the next ten days in New York City, visiting galleries and talking up her work. A few showed interest; most dismissed her as a kooky artist who burned wood for a living.

She didn’t care. She already had her heart set on running art classes in Redemption and the knock-backs didn’t sting as much as she’d expected. What did sting were Jake’s emails and texts and phone messages.

She screened all her calls. Listened to the messages he left with a heavy heart. But his emails got to her the most. Brief yet chatty, they painted a picture of life in Redemption that she knew intimately and missed. Dish of the day at the diner. Funny anecdotes about Olly. Updates about Cilla and Bryce’s burgeoning romance.

It made her ache with longing. It also made her wonder if she’d had anything with Jake beyond the illusion of happy families.

Because that’s what they’d done for that amazing week together—play happy families. They’d spent seven perfect days that encapsulated a summer vacation: swimming at the town pool,
afternoons
in the park, bike riding, roller-skating, picnics and lying on a blanket reading in the backyard.

It had been idyllic and special and too good to be true. As she knew all too well, when everything seemed perfect, it was an
illusion
and inevitably ended.

Sadly, another side effect of breaking up with Jake seemed to be a return to insomnia. Though this time around, she didn’t cry
herself
to sleep from missing her child; she tossed and turned,
missing
the warmth of Jake’s big, strong body wrapped around hers.

The boutique hotel apartment had lost its appeal too. She missed Gran’s house. Missed the large kitchen and comfy bed and sprawling backyard. She missed her pyrography tools most of all.

She had to go back. Just one more day . . .

Cilla had told her tomorrow would be the day Rose came out of rehab and Jake would take Olly back to her.

That meant Jake would leave Redemption for good.

And she could start the arduous task of forgetting him and Olly and how they’d helped bring her back to life.

On a deeper level that she’d never acknowledge, she’d miss them the most. She’d grown used to hearing Olly’s belly laughs, his amusingly blunt comments, his infectious giggles. She’d enjoyed Jake’s company; the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled, the special way he had of staring at her, his deliberate flirtation.

Jake had awakened her body in ways she’d never imagined and Olly had made her secretly yearn for a child’s innocence again.

Once they left, she needed to put both behind her.

Jake would soon give up pestering her when she maintained her silence, and would move on. Hopefully, she wouldn’t have to see him again. Much easier to remain distant when she didn’t have a sexy guy trying to persuade her in person.

Yes, tomorrow would be the day. Jake would be out of her life and she’d return to Redemption.

In the meantime, another twenty-four hours stretched before her in which she’d battle to forget the man who’d stolen her heart without trying.

40.

J
ake had been a madman the last ten days. Grouchy. Irrational. Touchy. Until Cilla had sat him down and made him see sense.

He’d ranted against Sara when she hadn’t returned his emails or texts or calls. Had said maybe Olly had been the real attraction between them; that he’d been an adjunct to her desperate need to make up for her lost child. He hadn’t told her about Rose possibly coming to live in Redemption, so as far as Sara knew Olly’s departure was imminent, and her fleeing to New York City proved that theory.

Cilla had called him a few choice names for his outlandish
speculation
and told him to wake up to the truth.

Sara had lost everything. Her child. Her husband. Her home. Her job. Her previous life.

She’d found acceptance and permanency in Redemption.

But when Olly left, Jake probably wouldn’t be part of that
permanence
. Sara would assume he’d leave. And that could be why she was ending it before it had begun.

When Cilla laid it out like that, it all seemed so simple.

So Jake set about proving to Sara that he was in this for the long haul. Which was why he’d hightailed it to New York City and now waited at her front door, rocking on the balls of his feet, resisting the urge to constantly check the documents in his jacket pocket.

She’d already buzzed him into the apartment building so he hadn’t wasted his time in turning up.

Now he needed to convince her that the place they both belonged, together, was Redemption.

She took her time answering the door and when it opened, he struggled not to bundle her into his arms.

“What are you doing here?” No greeting and she hung on the door, keeping it half closed. Not so glad to see him obviously.
Hopefully
, he could change that.

“We need to talk.” And he wouldn’t stop until he’d convinced her they belonged together. “Can I come in?”

She hesitated, and for the first time since he’d arrived, his
confidence
plummeted. The conversation they had to have wouldn’t pack the same punch while he was standing on a doorstep.

“I’m heading out soon, so you haven’t got long.” She opened the door wider and stepped aside.

“It won’t take long.”

He entered the small studio apartment and had a flashback to the first time he’d entered his. He’d loved living in New York City, loved the buzz and the vibe. It had been a far cry from his
upbringing
in that pokey house with Rose and his father. He’d
reveled
in the freedom.

But after the accident, his apartment had become a prison. Dreary. Confining. Depressing. It hadn’t been until the last few months in Redemption that he’d realized how much he’d needed to escape. Now, with what he’d done to prove his commitment to Sara, he hoped he’d be sticking around Redemption for a long time.

“Do you want something to drink? A soda?” She perched on the back of a small sofa, looking like she’d rather be anywhere other than here.

“You don’t need to play hostess for me,” he said, stopping two feet in front of her. “I just want to talk.”

If his proximity bothered her she didn’t show it, apart from a telltale sharp intake of breath that she released slowly.

“I thought we’d already said everything that needed to be said.” She eyeballed him, daring him to disagree.

“Actually, you spoke, I listened last time. Didn’t mean I agreed with any of it.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out the documents. “I get it. You were running scared. You think a relationship will lead to marriage and kids and that terrifies you because of what you went through with Lucy.”

She scowled. “You can never ‘get it’ because you have no freaking idea how painful it is to lose a child and I hope to God you never will.”

He faltered. Maybe their relationship
had
been about Olly a
ll along.

“Tell me this. Were you only interested in me because you were using Olly as some kind of surrogate kid and I was just part of t
he package?”

Her mouth dropped open a little before her eyes narrowed and she shot him a venomous glare that should’ve scorched him on the spot. “You really think I’m capable of doing something like that?”

“No, but you haven’t answered my question.”

“You’re an idiot,” she said, shoving him away and moving to the other side of the sofa. “What you and I had was nothing
to do
with Olly. No child could ever be a substitute for Lucy and I’d never use anyone the way you just suggested.” Her chest heaved with
indignation
. “I can’t believe you think I’d use
you
like that, not after what we shared.”

Hope flickered to life. “So it was real? You and me? All of it?”

After several long, tension-fraught moments, she nodded. “
Of course.”

“Then did you run because you think I’ll run too, once Olly’s back with Rose?” He glanced down at the paper in his hand, surprised to see he’d clutched it so tight it had wrinkled. “Because I won’t. I’m staying. In Redemption.”

Her eyes widened in surprise. “Why?”

Jake inhaled a deep breath. Here went nothing.

“Because I’m in love with you and I want to have a real
relationship
for the first time in my life.” He thrust the document at her. “And I’m hoping you’ll see how serious I am once you take a look at that.”

Sara appeared shell-shocked as she took the papers and unfolded them.

He waited, his fingers curling into fists. He shook them out, willing the nervous tingling away. If this failed, he had no idea what he’d do. He’d be stuck in a town with the woman he loved, who didn’t want anything to do with him.

Sure, he’d be near Rose and Olly and Cilla for a while, but being so close to Sara and not being able to have her—it would drive him insane.

Her gaze flew across the document and when she finally looked up, he let out his breath.

There were tears in her eyes. Whether of joy or sadness, he had no idea.

“You bought the Redemption airfield?” She glanced at the papers again and shook her head. “Why? When you couldn’t even go near the place last time?”

“To prove I’m in this for the long haul.” He thrust his hands in his pockets to stop from reaching for her. “I faced my fear for you, Sara. I’m going to open up a charter school. Have a small fleet of planes. Hire instructors. Get back in the game. Because I want to stay in Redemption and make a life with you.”

“You did this for
me
?”

To his horror, she burst into tears. The documents slipped from her fingers and fluttered to the floor.

“There’s not much I wouldn’t do for you,” he said, finally allowing himself the luxury of hauling her into his arms.

It reminded him of the first day they’d met, when she’d cried unashamedly. Now, like then, he wanted to hold this woman
forever
.

When her crying stopped, he eased back and captured her face with his hands. “So what do you think? Can we make a go of this?”

Her tear-stained face looked so forlorn he wanted to hug her again. “You’re right, I’m petrified of us getting in too deep because you’d end up wanting kids and I’m not sure if I can go through th
at again.”

“How about we take it one day at a time? Save the kids until we see if we can survive living together?”

Her eyebrows rose. “You want to move in?”

“If you’ll have me.” He mock frowned. “Otherwise, with Rose and Olly at Cilla’s, I’ll be bunking down in the hut at the end of the runway.”

Her tremulous smile had him wanting to punch the air in
victory
.

“Okay, you can move in, on one condition.”

He grinned. “Anything.”

“That you let me love you back.” Her arms snaked around his neck. “You’re the best man I’ve ever known, Jake. And if I have to face my fears, I’m glad it’s with you by my side.”

Jake didn’t cry but at that moment he came pretty damn close.

“Deal,” he said, a second before their lips met in a fusion of understanding and hope and love.

Best deal of his life.

41.

C
ould this get any better?” Bryce lay sprawled on his side in the long grass, propped on his elbow, as he watched Cilla gather herbs. He looked like a model, lying there shirtless, his chest dappled with sunlight.

A chest she’d explored in intimate detail, with her tongue and her lips and her hands. Heat scorched her cheeks at the memories they’d created over the last three weeks. Memories sh
e cou
ld hardly believe were real, they were that spectacular. Memories to base a future on, which is what they were fast
moving
toward.

“It could get better,” she deadpanned. “If you were naked.”

His slow, sexy grin made her heart pound. “I love the sex maniac you’ve become.”

“Your fault,” she said. “Never knew I had it in me.”

“Oh, you’ve got it, sweetheart, and then some.” He sat up and patted the spot on the blanket next to him. “Why don’t you come sit and I’ll prove it to you?”

“Rose and Olly will be back from Sara’s any minute,” she said, but sat next to him anyway. “And Jake’s due back from the airfield to pack the last of his stuff.”

“Damn. I’ll have to wait.” He nuzzled her neck. “Not too long, I hope.”

“You’re insatiable.” She bumped him away playfully, loving the way her body reacted to him now she’d let go all her reservations.

“Only for you.” He kissed her lips, slow and lingering. “I’ve waited too long so I’m making up for lost time.”

“Actually, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”

Cilla knew she was crazy for even contemplating what she was about to ask him.

But circumstances had changed.

She’d changed.

And this marvelous man was such a huge part of that she couldn’t let him go.

“You know how you keep bugging me to spend more time together?” Heck, was she really about to say this?

His face lit up. “You’re moving in with me? Fantastic, because we can—”

“Actually, I was thinking perhaps you could move in here? I know Rose and Olly will be around, and that may cramp our style a bit, but my place is big enough for all of us and—”

“Yes. Hell yes.” He cupped her face and kissed her until she saw stars. “You have no idea what this means.”

Actually, she did. Because she’d come to learn over the last few weeks that Bryce was as much of a loner as she was. He hadn’t been in a serious relationship and he’d never lived with anyone. So wanting to live together was akin to making a full-blown declaration of their insanity in falling for each other, despite the age difference.

When he finally let her come up for air, she added. “I know you said you don’t want children. But having Olly around for a while will give you an idea of whether you do. Then maybe we can foster, make a real difference in some poor kid’s life, if that’s what you want to do?”

He stared at her, his ebony eyes wide with shock. “You’d do that for me?”

She nodded. “If that’s what you wanted.”

She mentally searched for the right words to tell him how much he meant to her, then settled for the truth. “Bryce, I had no idea I could be this happy. No clue that being in a relationship with a man could be filled with joy and laughter, not pain and devastation. You’ve opened my eyes in a way I’d never thought possible and I’d like to thank you for that.”

He blinked rapidly but she saw the sheen of tears. “You don’t have to thank me. I’ll be here for you. Always.”

That surprised her. His locum stint would be ending shortly, hence her magnanimous invitation for him to move in. She knew it would only be short term, and she wanted to spend as much time with him as possible.

“You don’t have to make any promises you can’t keep—”

“Ssh . . .” He placed a finger against her lips. “I’ve applied for a permanent residency at the hospital. No idea if I’ll get it, but the fact they’ve liked having me around the last few months should hold me in good stead.”

Incredulous, she opened her mouth, closed it again, before finally getting her brain and mouth to work in sync. “You’re staying?”

He smiled. “Already regretting that offer for me to move in?”

Bryce. Living with her. Permanently.

It should scare the bejeesus out of her, but it didn’t.

Since she’d opened her heart to him, she knew he was exactly where she wanted him to be: by her side.

“Not at all, roomie.”

“So that’s how you see me, huh?” He eased her down onto the blanket and rolled his strong body on top of hers. “As a roommate?”

“A roommate with benefits,” Cilla said, a second before his lips covered hers, silencing her fears and doubts, and giving her hope for an amazing future.