“Really?” She looked genuinely shocked.
“You know I’m not so conventional in some ways.” Jack walked the line between honest and appropriate. “We can both play to the public demands and act like what they need to see. In private, we are who we are. Henry and I want you to be happy. If you truly want marriage and children, I think it’s the best solution for us all.”
“You’re right. We’re not strangers. What happened in the barn was amazing. Whoever I don’t marry might feel slighted or look that way to the townsfolk. I need to think it all through. I do want that life.”
“And the freedom we offer. We won’t interfere with any of your efforts to aid the whores, orphans, or the vote. Anything you want to pursue. Henry and I aren’t poor, but with your fortune, we’ll have a good nest egg and a great ranch to hand down to a son.” Jack wanted children. He wanted convention in some way.
“And if there are only girls?” she asked.
He grinned. “Spoiled rotten, highly educated, and married well.” He watched her face light up.
“Good answer.” She nodded. “But wouldn’t the children be confused?”
As she showed her intelligence, Jack wanted her all the more. A simple woman who did as she was asked would never satisfy the Bonner men. “Does the Widow Lange know anything went on in the barn? Is she suspicious?”
She shook her blonde curls. “No. I’m sure some things would work themselves out in the future, if I married you. I just feel as though someone would be slighted. We wouldn’t fit. Would the other man marry, and what would be expected then?”
Jack rode up close to Emily and took her hand, pulling her horse to a stop. “Please don’t worry about all of that. You just need to decide which of us you want to marry. If either of us will do. Even if you don’t, we’ll keep your secret. If you don’t want more, say so.”
The deep red in her cheeks told him the truth and relief filled him.
“Good,” he said. “We want more of you as well, but the protection of marriage is a big one. Understand it’s your choice. No one will pressure you, except maybe Mrs Lange. No chaperone, no sister, no brother-in-law will outrank a husband, and I’d be the most permissive one in Colorado.”
“Thank you, Jack. I appreciate your honesty. I wish I could ride over and spend time in the barn again,” she confessed.
“That would be too dangerous. Especially with people seeing us riding out together.” He looked around. No one could hear them, but he could see other people.
“It’ll be all over town tomorrow that we’re courting.” She sighed.
“I hope so. When you go out with Henry, it’ll cause a lot more talk. Enjoy it. You have your pick of men. Once you’re married, you’re stuck.” He winked at her.
“Men get away with so much more than women can.” She nudged her horse forward.
“True, but you know the truth about us. So you’ll always have a bit more power over your husband than the average wife. For the record, we don’t want a wife each. We’re sort of a package deal if you’re up for it.” He hoped that little tidbit would entice her into a quick decision.
* * * *
Two days later, Henry set about spreading the blanket on the grassy stretch between Emily’s house and the church. They’d taken Henry’s open wagon so there was no privacy on the ride. Things were completely appropriate and they could have a private talk in the glorious sunshine.
“At least we didn’t totally scare you off.” Henry sat as Emily unpacked supper.
“No, I’m not scared. Although I do worry it won’t be as simple as you two think it will be. Marriage is serious business. I don’t want to regret anything.” She opened the dishes.
“I know. I’m sorry I tried to push things that day. I was so taken with you. Jack was too, but he has better self-control. More sense. You should marry him.” Henry dug into the food ravenously. The chicken and fresh-roasted corn smelled too good to wait.
“That’s quite odd. If you’re bowing out, I understand.” Emily took a sip of lemonade and looked out at the town.
As the wilder and less serious type, Henry wanted to be traditional in his courting attempt. He was fun but people would be shocked if he was ready to settle down first. He was the one who never minded a trip to Denver or a ride to another town if they needed a tool or different feed. Jack settled into the ranch life much better while Henry had no trouble spending days on horseback.
“I’m not bowing out. I want you in private. But as far as a husband and father and an official type, you know me. I tell the truth. Jack is better. People will believe it easier.” Henry shrugged. “I’m more of a bachelor. The town won’t think twice about me staying at the ranch because it’s convenient for ranching. Good food, my nieces and nephews, and work will all be right there. We built the house big enough for that reason. No point in me getting married and moving.”
“You and Jack. You really do love him, don’t you?” she asked.
Henry grinned. “We love each other and have had our eyes on you for a long, long time. I want a family. Don’t doubt that. I just don’t have much experience with one. People look at you differently when you’re an orphan. When no one wants you or trusts you, it’s hard to believe in family or people. I trust Jack. He’s my family. I don’t need a piece of paper to tell me that with him or you. Love is what it is. I’m lucky if you marry into this. Make it real.”
“It is real. You don’t need me.” She toyed with her food.
He took her hand. “The hell we don’t. We both love you. We’ve always wanted a woman in our bed. It’s not new. It’s not a cover for anything. I mean, it would be, but we could’ve found someone long ago. We were waiting for you. If you need more proof, we’ll give it to you. We’ll find a way. Jack was right to keep you innocent so you can say no, if you want. Don’t you doubt our intentions or desires. We may have been born poor, but we earned our way. You can lose every penny you inherited and you’d still be comfortable the rest of your life with us. Children too.”
“Most women don’t have as much contact with their prospective suitors as I have and I’m complaining.” Emily blushed.
“We’re not totally traditional. I understand it’s a shock. But you’re special as well.” Henry went back to eating. “You didn’t run screaming from the barn and bring back the town to set us on fire.”
She giggled. “Never. I don’t judge others. It is a big commitment, though.”
“No rush.” Henry smiled. “But you’ll have to settle on one man if you’re going to have a long courtship. I won’t feel slighted. I can play the best friend and best man type as long as you’ll share in bed.”
“You truly believe I should marry Jack?” she asked.
“He’ll keep his hands to himself and handle the questions tactfully until the wedding. People will talk in town and I might punch someone.” Henry stared at her beautiful face. Their children would be loved by more parents than he’d ever had. As three loving adults, they’d never go off course or feel alone.
“That’s true. There are bound to be hurt feelings since so many men were following me after church. I don’t want anyone getting injured.” Emily pulled dessert from the basket. “I believe you said your favorite was cherry.”
“You remembered?” Henry grinned like a fool as he grabbed a piece. “I love you even more now.”
“I didn’t bake it.” Emily stabbed a cherry with her fork.
“We have a housekeeper too. You don’t need to cook. Your charity work is impressive. Most of the men don’t like the causes you’ve chosen, but whores should be able to read and write. They won’t be earning well at that work forever. Options are good.” Henry smiled.
“You really mean that? Most people look at those women like they’re trash.” She licked her lips.
He shook his head. “If I was born a girl, I could’ve been a whore. I had more options because I was a boy. I don’t forget where I came from. When I started to feel sorry for myself as a kid, I’d look at the young women and knew I was damn lucky. The way men talked about females who weren’t even eighteen yet, disgusting. Some of the women who ran orphanages would sell the teenage girls off to a brothel when they got to be a certain age. Especially if they had no siblings to object.”
“That’s awful.” Emily took a drink.
“I’m sorry. This isn’t good dinner conversation. See, Jack knows better. He’s skilled at that more traditional stuff. He’s the one to marry. I just wanted to make sure you know that we’re not just handing you fool’s gold until the wedding. I’m not any better than those whores. I’ll never ask you to stop helping them to find better lives. Jack won’t either. We’ve been together a long time. He can fit in with others better, but he knows how easily anyone can fall down the rungs in life.” He nudged the plate with pie on Emily’s dark blue skirt.
She took another bite and he watched her long neck as she swallowed. Those beautiful lips had done scandalous things a few days ago. He wanted more with her under any circumstances. Marriage would be pressure and Jack could handle it.
“I believe you both. I need to think over things a bit more. But thank you for telling me your opinion on who to marry. Choosing would be so hard.” She bit her lower lip.
“You never have to choose who to love. Only what the public sees.” Henry focused on his pie to keep from kissing her and forgetting they were in public.
Chapter Five
The next Sunday, the Bonner men attended church and stayed for lunch. Emily had been debating which one to marry every night in her dreams. After the men went home, she paced the parlor. Henry had given her an out, but would it be better to marry the orphan so he felt stable?
“You miss them already?” Alice sat quietly with her sewing.
Emily grinned. “I do. It’s a hard decision. I like them both.”
“You must have a preference. It seemed to me Henry spoke less. I think he’s letting his cousin take the lead.” Alice nodded.
“You prefer Jack?” Emily asked as she pondered her stack of new books from Denver.
“Being a husband and a father is serious business. Henry may need to mature a bit more before he’s ready to settle down. Jack is clearly ready. You like him,” Alice said.
“Yes, I do. The other men have backed off, thankfully.” She itched for the Bonner men to touch her again. After her reckless behavior, proper courting was maddening.
“It’s delightful. Now you have no rush to set a date and can court for a bit.” Alice sat back and smiled. “Perhaps one day I’ll dare to marry again.”
“I hope so.” Emily settled in a chair and tried to read but knew she had to act. “I don’t know if I want to wait.”
“What do you mean?” Alice asked with a touch of unease in her voice.
“For the wedding. I prefer not to delay. There’s no point in courting under scrutiny for months and months. Once we’re married, it’s done.” Emily shrugged.
Alice set her sewing aside. “I understand. Once you’ve made a decision, you want to go forward. But you must be proposed to and speak to the reverend. Your sister will want to meet him as well as your brother-in-law, I’m sure.”
“I’m an adult. I don’t need anyone’s approval. I don’t like this odd state the town has put me in and I want it resolved. Seems that marriage is the best way.” Emily rubbed her temples. “I’m tired. I’m going to bed now. I have a lot of thinking to do and I don’t want another headache.”
“I’ll send Dora up to help you change. She can bring you some tea as well.” Alice frowned. “I won’t push you into anything, Emily. If he’s not the right man, you can keep looking. Take your time.”
Emily knew that wasn’t the problem. She nodded and headed upstairs.
Once in her room, she sat at her vanity and removed her delicate jewelry. A few minutes later, there was a knock at the door.
“Come in,” Emily said.
Dora stepped inside with a tea tray and set it on the bed. “Are you feeling poorly?” Dora moved in behind her at the vanity.
“Not exactly. I have a bit of a headache. I’m honestly just confused.” Emily let Dora take her hair down since it might relieve her pain. “I will marry one of them. It’s right, I know it.”
Dora ran a brush through Emily’s hair. “You found love. That’s wonderful. Do you want to change your clothes now?”
“I want to see them. Talk to them.” Emily knew it was wrong.
“They do have a housekeeper. It’s not like it’d be totally inappropriate,” Dora said.
“Alice would disagree.” Emily smiled at the fuss over propriety.
“She’s already dozing over her sewing by the fire. It’s been a long day. You could ride out and be back before anyone notices.”
“Dora, I believe you’re a bad influence,” Emily said.
“You’ll come back engaged for sure. It’ll be a quick wedding, especially if anyone finds out.” Dora selected a dark coat for the late-evening ride.
* * * *
Emily road quietly to the Bonner ranch and stabled her horse in the barn. When she set foot on the porch, she heard movement inside. A gun met her at the door.
“Sorry. I didn’t think it was you. What are you doing here?” Henry asked as he pulled the gun back.
She caught her breath as they showed her in. “I missed you two. I’m tired of chaperones. Why the gun?”
“Can’t be too careful, and those men in church were giving us some hateful looks.” Henry grinned. “It’s nice to see you.”
Jack cleared the table of his shotgun. “With no wagon or change of clothes? No chaperone? This isn’t smart, Emily.”
“Your housekeeper isn’t here?” she asked. The house was pleasant and bigger than it appeared. A wide parlor had functional furnishings and the kitchen held a large table. It looked much like a man’s domain. The housekeeper had all the necessities stored neatly. Emily could envision adding her touches to all the beautiful wood and making it fit for a lady, as her sister would say.
“In bed already. She’s got a bad case of hay fever today,” Henry replied.
“I’m sorry to hear that. I thought you two were interested in me and marriage. Was I wrong?” she asked.
“No, of course not. I figured you’d take your time. Neither of us has proposed yet.” Jack folded his arms.
“I don’t see a reason to wait. The three of us need to sort this out. I can’t keep courting with everyone watching us. Not knowing what’s right or how to make it look okay. Once the marriage is done, we’re safe.” She smiled.