Return to You (2 page)

“It's good to see you, Jen,” he said, doing his best to sound impersonal yet professional, but her grin had always been infectious.

“You too,” she said and then anxiously looked around. “As much as I wish this was a social call, I really do need to talk to you about a possible criminal matter.”

Her statement piqued his curiosity, not that he thought Jen would stop by after all these years on a social call. James escorted her to his desk, sat back, and listened to her tell her story about her ex-boyfriend and the recent harassment. Unfortunately, the guy hadn't broken any laws and so there wasn't anything James could do but offer his sympathy and tell her to keep a journal of the behavior. While he knew it was of little comfort or help to her, there simply wasn't a damn thing he could do.

He hated the look that came across her face: defeat. There had been a time in his life when he'd known that feeling all too well. Most days he was over it, but every once in a while—like now—it was easy for it to creep back up on him.

“I'm really sorry, Jen. I wish there was more I could do. I'll run a check on this guy and see if anything turns up.”

Once they had covered that, Jen had visibly relaxed in her chair and smiled. “I still can't believe it's you,” she said easily. “I mean, I knew I was going to find you here; I still keep in touch with your cousin Kent. He was the one who suggested I come and talk to you. I guess I hoped there was something that could be done even though all of my online research told me there probably wasn't.”

“I'll start a file about it, and I'll check in with you to keep up to date on what's going on and if this guy's pattern of behavior changes or gets more aggressive.”

“Thank you.” She paused and then considered her next words. “So, how have you been? It's been a really long time. How long have you been a cop? Where are you living now?” She must have thought she was throwing him too many questions and blushed. “Sorry. I'm just really glad to see you. But really, how are you?”

How was he supposed to sum up his life since they'd last seen each other? Was he supposed to tell her about all the ways he'd been to hell and back? That he'd been working his ass off to prove to the world—or at least to one person in particular—that he was good enough and that he'd made something of himself? Probably not. Rather than go on a rant, James decided to keep it simple. “I'm good,” he said. “I've been a cop for the last eight years. Actually, I'm a detective now.”

She nodded. “Do you enjoy it? I mean, not that it's a fun job or anything, or maybe it is. You never know.” She stopped her rambling again and smiled. “It suits you. You look good. Happy.”

James shrugged.
Happy?
He wasn't sure he'd go that far, but he wouldn't argue with the fact that being on the force had him feeling somewhat satisfied. “How about you? What are you doing with yourself?”

“I am an elementary school teacher now, third grade. I love it.”

Even if she hadn't added those last words, her face and smile said it all. Jennifer Lawson had changed very little: her blond hair was a little shorter, her clothes more conservative, but she had an aura about her that bristled with energy and enthusiasm. Years ago, she had always greeted everyone with a smile and had been nothing but kind to him. It hit James then how much he had missed her friendship. Her smile. Her optimism.

“That's great, Jen. I bet your kids love you.” He could easily picture her in a room full of eight-year-olds—laughing and smiling and doing projects with them. She had often talked about her desire to teach even when she was still in school, and James was proud of her for following through on her dream.

“Oh, I'm not so sure about that,” she said. “They like me fine when it's recess or we're doing art projects, but once it's test time, then I'm the meanest teacher on the planet.”

James smiled at her. “I remember feeling that way myself back in the day. Teachers were great just as long as they weren't handing out a test.”

“I'm teaching at the same elementary school I went to, and it's kind of weird walking those halls as an adult. When we were students, everything looked so big, and now I walk around and feel like a giant.”

“You couldn't pay me to go back to school,” he said, his tone a little more serious than he intended. “I couldn't wait to get out. I give you credit for doing what you do, Jen. Not many people want to do it. Once the diploma's in your hand, you just want to take it and run and never look back.”

She shrugged. “I always enjoyed school…and not only for social reasons, although I guess that was a definite perk. I know it makes me sound a bit nerdy, but I enjoyed the friendly competition between me and my classmates and the sense of accomplishment I felt when I got good grades.” She heard herself and almost cringed. “Wow, that definitely made me sound nerdy, didn't it?”

James chuckled before agreeing with her. “It's okay. Nerdy works on you. So, what challenges are you finding in the third graders?”

“Other than behavioral stuff, nothing too exciting. We have a curriculum we have to follow, so I don't get to be as creative in the classroom as I'd like, but it's fine. Right now I have a bigger challenge at hand. I'm actually planning our ten-year reunion. Gosh, can you believe we've been out of school for so long?”

“Well…” James began.

“Oh, right. Sorry.”

James had dropped out of high school at sixteen, so all this talk about reunions and whatnot was lost on him. Still, he could see that it was something Jen was excited about, so he figured he'd grin and bear it and hear her out. “No big deal. So, what are you planning?”

Jen ran through a list of details, including the venue, the theme, the response from classmates, activities for the weekend, and even the menu.

“That seems like an awful lot of work. I hope you have a big committee helping you.”

Jen nodded. “We have about two dozen people pulling it all together. It's amazing how many people are stepping up and volunteering their time and services to help out. A lot of the graduates stayed in the area and have businesses of their own, so we have someone volunteering printing services for the invitations, another person donating balloons, flowers, and decorations, and we even have someone offering the use of the bowling alley for a get-together. It's going to be such a great weekend, but there's so much to do to make it all happen.”

“It certainly sounds like it,” he said with a chuckle. “So what are you, chairman?”

That made her laugh. “I am great at following instructions and delegating, but I'm not organized enough to pull off something like this. It's just too huge.”

“Oh, come on,” he said playfully. “You have to be organized, being a teacher and coordinating lesson plans and all that, plus you teach a roomful of eight-year-olds. You can't tell me you're not organized. It's not possible.”

“Well, it's true I'm organized in my classroom, but that's different from putting together an event of this size. With my students, I have a curriculum and lesson plans. I can mix things up a little bit with them, but for the most part, the organization is done for me. With the reunion, it's so much more, and there's no formal plan to follow. Luckily, we have a chairman…or chairwoman, and I'm perfectly okay with following orders. It makes me happier, and I'm sure the graduating class as a whole will appreciate it just as much.”

“As long as you have fun with it, how bad can it be, right?” he asked.

They sat in silence for a moment while James wrestled with the question that had been on the tip of his tongue since Jen had walked in the door. Knowing he would never have peace unless he asked, he took a calming breath, willed his heart rate to slow down, and did his best to sound casual. “So, you must be excited to be getting together with everyone. Is your old crowd going to be there?”

Jen wanted to smirk but did her best to keep her expression neutral. She was surprised it had taken this long to get to the subject. “Well, Kent is coming, and I think Tom, Russ, Chris, and Kerry are going to be there too.” She paused for dramatic effect. “Selena wasn't going to come, but I talked her into being our chairwoman so now she has to. I spoke to…”

James knew Jen was still speaking, but all he could hear was a loud buzzing in his head. His heart pounded, and he was pretty sure he was starting to sweat. She was coming home. Finally.

She'd be close enough to see.

Close enough to talk to in person.

Close
enough
to
touch.

“Well, anyway,” Jen said as she stood, “thanks for taking the time to see me. I'll do like you said and start keeping a journal of any time Todd calls or I see him. I'm hoping that he'll just get bored and move on, but you never know. I would've thought he'd get bored by now. Clearly he has nothing better to do with his time. It's pretty sad actually.” She smiled. “Anyway, it was really good to see you again, James, and I hope it isn't another ten years before we see each other again.” Before he knew it, she had her arms around him and was hugging him and placing a quick kiss on his cheek. The whole thing took him by surprise and the next thing he knew, she was waving and walking away.

By the time Jen left, James was sure he'd come off without sounding too much like a babbling idiot, and if he could remember correctly, he was sure he had said he might stop in on some of the reunion activities…just to see the old crowd, of course.

Right.

If Jen suspected anything different, she had kept it to herself. James looked at his calendar and saw that he had about six weeks to prepare himself and to come up with some kind of excuse to put himself in Selena's path that wouldn't seem like he was trying to be there. He had no idea what that would entail or what he was going to do once he saw her again. It had been a long time, and although not a day had gone by when he hadn't thought about her, he had no idea about the woman she had become. Would she be happy to see him? Would she even be coming to this thing alone? That thought made his fists clench. He may not have any claim on Selena anymore, but that didn't mean he'd be happy to see her walking around town with another man.

She was his.

It didn't matter how much time had gone by since they'd last seen one another; James would always consider Selena to be his. He just couldn't decide if that was a good thing or a bad thing. Either way, he had six weeks to figure out what he was going to do about it.

Part of his job in law enforcement was having confidence and not shying away from a challenge or a dangerous situation—even at the risk of his own life.

And there was nothing more dangerous to James Montgomery than coming face-to-face with the woman who had essentially destroyed his whole life.

“The Facebook page has been super helpful in getting the word out. We got an amazing response so far. Believe it or not, it looks like about ninety percent of the class is actually coming. Isn't that awesome?” Jen said enthusiastically as she and Selena sat at her dining room table eating Chinese food and going over the reunion details.

“Gotta love social media,” Selena replied absently as she scanned the supply list for each committee. Her lifelong love of arts and crafts made this kind of event all the more fun. She'd personally designed the invitations and announcements and favors they were going to use. There was no way she was going to let this reunion be of the cookie-cutter variety. All through school, Selena had been known for the great parties she'd thrown, and this one was going to be the feather in her cap.

“Remember Dena Michaels? She does custom cakes and whatnot now. She's going to be doing all of the desserts.”

“Mm-hmm.” Searching through the papers, she found the pictures of the cupcakes and tortes and cookies she wanted Dena to recreate. She'd seen them on Pinterest and thought that with a little creativity, they could theme them with the school colors. Selena scanned the list and made a note to add more finger foods that would be easy to pick up and serve rather than having to be cut.

“And Rick Walters? His printing business did a great job on the invites. He gave us a huge discount.”

“Uh-huh.” More searching and rifling through the stack of papers found the drawing she had done. Rick Walters had been a little wary of trying to copy her design, but in the end he had agreed. Three hundred invites plus envelopes, labels, and stamps. She made a quick note of Rick's discount and smiled to see that the invitations were yet another element that was coming in under budget.

“Christy Williams's family still owns that party supply place in Smithtown, and they donated all of the decorations! That saved us a fortune!”

“Mmm…” Christy and Selena used to work on all of the school dance and prom committees, so they were completely in tune with one another on this subject. Selena had emailed her the list and description of the type of decorations she wanted, and Christy took care of ordering them. It was perfect. All that was left was assembling them, and Selena knew she could knock that out with a small committee in an afternoon.

“But the best news is that I was able to get the cast of
Magic
Mike
to perform and do their show! Can you believe it? Five of the hottest men in Hollywood, coming to our reunion and stripping for all of us. They look amazing up on the big screen, so I can only imagine how hot they'll look dancing around the banquet hall. Personally, I'm hoping to lick Matthew McConaughey's chest.”

“I'm sure.” Entertainment…entertainment…had they decided on a band or DJ yet? Somewhere in her pile of papers was the playlist she had customized with music from their high school years.

Jen paused and waited for a more rational response from Selena, and when she didn't get one, she continued. “I took belly dancing and pole dancing classes, so maybe I can join them. I'll probably need to do some sort of juice fast to lose those last stubborn five pounds, but I think it's going to be a hit. Of course I should probably cut back on the carbs if I'm going to be dancing in a thong, but—”

“Wait…
what
? What are you talking about?”

“I knew you weren't paying attention to me!” Jen cried. “You've had these reports sent over to you weekly since we started planning the reunion, Selena. Put the paperwork down and talk to me! You've been in my house for less than three hours, and you've barely uttered three full sentences. What's going on?”

With a slightly irritated sigh, Selena pushed the paperwork away. She picked up her fork, stabbed a piece of broccoli, and took a bite. “This is a big event. I tend to get a little wrapped up in the particulars, and I just want to make sure we didn't miss anything, that everyone has been reimbursed and all that.” She toyed with her sesame chicken. “This was a big thing for me, Jen, coming back here and all. Cut me a little slack. It was more overwhelming than I thought just dealing with the drive from the airport. Everything looks so…different.”

“It's been a while…”

“I'm aware.”

“Look, all I'm saying is things change and that's not a bad thing. Tomorrow we'll drive around, see some familiar sights. I know a lot has changed, but you'll be amazed at how much has stayed the same. I'll take you by the school, and believe me when I tell you nothing has changed there. Sometimes I swear it's even the same desks and chairs in the classrooms that we used to use.”

“No! That would be horrible! Doesn't the school have a budget for that sort of thing?”

Jen shrugged. “If they do, they're not using it. A lot of the stuff in my classroom is outdated; I use a lot of my own money to freshen things up, but I certainly can't buy new desks and chairs for thirty-plus kids.”

“Nor should you be expected to,” Selena said, offended for her friend.

“Anyway, we'll see the school, and we'll do lunch at the diner maybe, and your favorite ice cream place is still here!”

“Seriously? Is it still the same owners? I used to love Mr. and Mrs. Davies. They made the best milk shakes.”

“Their kids run the place now, but it's still the same. I stop in and have a milk shake for you at least once a week.”

“Am I enjoying them?”

“Sometimes a little too much,” Jen said with a laugh. “Anyway, do you have plans to see your family?”

Selena couldn't help the snort that escaped at the question. “You're kidding, right?”

“What? What did I say?”

“I didn't really tell anyone I was coming up here. I couldn't handle them along with the whole reunion thing. But my grandmother is living in one of those senior communities, and I'm hoping we'll be able to have lunch together.”

“She must be so surprised that you're coming to see her!”

She shrugged. “I haven't told her yet. I was planning to surprise her.”

Jen frowned. “She's got to be like eighty years old; do you really think it's a good thing to surprise her? You could kill her.”

“That's a pleasant thought,” Selena mocked. “Why would you even say that?”

“It's just that she's old, and her heart could be weak… You don't
surprise
the elderly, Selena. That's just mean.”

“You've really gotten dramatic in the last ten years, you know that, right?”

“It's a gift.”

They laughed. “I wanted to call her and let her know I was coming, but I didn't want her to call anyone else and then run the risk of having a whole family reunion thing. One reunion is enough.”

“When was the last time you saw your dad?” Jen asked cautiously.

Just the thought of her father had Selena's ire rising. He was the first negative influence she had walked away from, and in the four years since they'd last seen one another, Selena had never been happier. “It's been…a long time.”

“Does he even try to see you?”

Selena shook her head. “Not really. Every once in a while my sister will throw the guilt trip at me:
Dad
misses
you. You should give him a chance; he's changed.
Blah, blah, blah. We didn't get along while I was growing up, he's never let me forget how I disappointed him, and to be honest, I don't need that kind of negativity in my life. I keep telling her she shouldn't push it, that now she can finally claim that daughter-of-the-year thing she's been going for all her life. I want no part of him.”

“But he's your dad…”

“Fathers don't act the way he did. He wasn't just cruel, Jen; he was hateful. You know it and I know it. He wanted to control my life, and when I wouldn't fall in line with his plans, he just turned mean. Believe me, my life has been so much better without him. Sometimes I'll make a mistake at work and my first thought is ‘Oh my God, Dad's going to kill me.' It shouldn't be like that! I'm a grown woman, and yet at the first sign of messing up, I'm immediately afraid of his reaction. How messed up is that?”

Jen wasn't sure how to answer that one. “I guess it's a natural response, Selena. It's programmed into you. Hopefully, it will get easier as time goes on.”

Selena wasn't sure she believed her but didn't want to argue the point.

“How's your mom doing?”

Again Selena shrugged. “She's good. Mom's always good.” It was true enough, but part of that had to do with the fact that her mother never liked confrontation—she put up a good front for the world to see, and sometimes Selena resented that. It would be nice to know that she wasn't the only one in her family who got ticked off and emotional sometimes. “Since the divorce, she's become more confident, and last year she actually started dating again.”

“No!”

“Yes! It's true. It's weird and awkward at times, but it's true.” The last time she had talked to her mother, she had to hear all about her latest date—they had gone to dinner and dancing—and then it turned to talk about all of the years Selena's father never took her dancing. Yes, sometimes it was just painful.

“So your mom's dating. Are you?”

Selena made a dismissive sound. “Please. The business keeps me so busy, I don't have the time.”

“So make the time,” Jen pleaded as she reached across the table and put her hand over Selena's. “Trust me, you may enjoy yourself.”

“And then what? End up with some creep stalking me? No thanks.” She looked up and saw the devastated look on her friend's face and instantly apologized. “That was inexcusable, Jen. I'm so sorry. I…” Her words died in her throat as Jen turned away. If she wasn't mistaken, she heard her sniffle and that made her feel ten times worse.
Way
to
go, Selena,
she mocked herself.
You've been back in town for a handful of hours, and you've already managed to disappoint the one person who's always there for you.

Standing, Jen cleared their plates and rinsed them without a word before returning to the dining room. “Not all guys are creepy,” she said matter-of-factly. “I thought you had your eye on that CPA in the office across the street from yours. What happened there?”

Ugh
. While Jen knew Selena better than anyone, Selena wasn't comfortable admitting how uncomfortable it was for her to go out on dates. The whole awkward first date, making small talk… There was no appeal to it at all. Most of the time she just counted down the minutes until it was acceptable to plead a headache and leave. And besides the awkwardness, there was…the feeling. She knew she was being overly picky, but no man had ever made her
feel
or
want
in a really long time.

No one since James.

Dammit.

Well, that didn't take long, did it? Three whole hours back in the state, and you've already started your uncomfortable journey down memory lane. Awesome.

That wasn't to say she lived a celibate life. There were just some very long dry spells in the sex and romance department. Occasionally friends set her up with a guy, and they'd go out a couple of times, but after a month Selena would find an excuse to end things. Casual sex wasn't her thing, and the men she had gotten involved with—however briefly—just fell short of her expectations. She had gotten used to it, was totally fine with it. Hell, she barely even thought about it. Until now.

Dammit.

“Selena?” Jen prompted.

Oh, right, the CPA. “Our schedules just didn't mesh. He had tax season, and then I was in the midst of graduation parties and proms and weddings, and after a while we just both agreed that it wasn't going to work.” Selena remembered actually feeling relieved when the guy finally stopped calling and accepted her reasoning.

“You don't sound particularly heartbroken about it.”

Selena looked at her as if she had two heads. “Why would I be heartbroken? I barely knew him, and we only had a couple of coffee dates, so it wasn't a big deal. Besides, there was no real…connection to him, you know?” She shrugged. “If it makes you feel any better, I'll look into one of those online dating sites and go out on a couple of dates.” She wouldn't, but Selena figured she'd humor Jen for the time being if for no other reason than to get off this topic.

“Don't be ridiculous,” Jen said with a snap in her voice. “You don't know what kind of crazy people you can meet like that. Maybe…maybe you'll meet someone while you're here visiting.”

Unable to help herself, Selena burst out laughing.

“What's so damn funny about that?” Jen asked.

“Boy, you just don't give up, do you?” Selena said. “I mean, I'm here. I'm participating in the reunion and all that. Bottom line, Jen, I'm here to see you, see my grandmother, go to the reunion, and go home. End of story.” That was her plan and she was sticking to it. Besides, there was absolutely no chance of her meeting anyone here who she'd want to spend time with. Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt.

Jen wanted more than anything to protest but decided to bide her time and simply nodded instead. “Okay, fine. I just thought that we could go out, maybe go dancing and, you know, see if we meet anyone.” Maybe she'd have to find out where James liked to hang out and orchestrate their first meeting.

Selena smiled. “We can still go out and do all of that. I'm just not looking to meet anyone while I'm here.” She took a sip of her water—which had been sitting so long the ice had melted—and then decided to turn the tables on her friend. “So what about you? Other than this stalker guy, is there anyone you're interested in?”