On Raven's Wings (2 page)

“No. Just go LiLo.”

“I am not going on stage without underwear. I’m playing the drum set, Triniti! I can’t even keep my legs together.”

She tapped a long fingernail against her cheek. “That’s a really great way to get publicity…”

“No!”

“Well, you can’t go out there with the dress like that.”

I glared at her, and then shimmied my underwear down my legs. I kicked them on my pile of discarded clothes. The old me shriveled up like the Wicked Witch of the West when she had the water dumped on her.

“Hopefully no one will see anything through the drumhead. I’m so glad we went with the black logo instead of the white one,” I said.

Triniti threw her arms around me. “Welcome to the world of hot girls, Raven. I knew you were hiding in there somewhere.”

“I’m still not sure this is me. I’ve been a goody two shoes my whole life. I feel like Sandy at the end of Grease.”

“Grease?” Triniti looked confused.

“The old movie from the ‘70s? About the good girl and the bad boy?”

Her stare couldn’t have been any more blank.

“Olivia Newton John and John Travolta?”

Triniti snapped her fingers. “Oh yeah, that Scientology guy who might be gay?”

“Yeah, that’s it.” I giggled. Triniti and I had a lot in common, but vintage movies obviously weren’t one of them.

“You ready to show the world what you’re made of?”

She held out her hand.

“Hang on a sec,” I said. I reached into the hip pocket of my jeans, pulled out my little square scapular and stuffed it into my shoe. A small relic from Catholic school days. Legend said if we died while wearing a scapular, we’d go straight to heaven. With the way my nerves were acting, a little reassurance couldn’t hurt.

I slipped my hand into Triniti’s and we headed out of the tiny room. A low whistle carried in the air. “Damn, Raven. What did Triniti do to you?”

My first instinct was to twirl around like a little girl, but instead I cocked one hip out to the side and rolled my eyes. “I have no idea what you’re talking about, Troy. I always look like this.”

“Pick up your jaw, Rick.” Triniti tapped his chin with her fingertips. “Remember, no dating in the group. If you guys think Raven’s hot, then use it to sell the band. Dicks off, boys.”

“Well that was before I realized she was so sexy.” Troy slung his guitar to the side, then lifted the neck of the guitar out in a faux erection.

I slapped him on the shoulder. “Haha, funny.” I took a deep breath. “You guys ready?”

Rick nodded. “Let’s kill ‘em.”

I imagined a bar would be filled with smoke and the stink of beer, but since it was underage night none of those temptations hung in the air. Instead, the scent of cola and popcorn permeated the stale atmosphere. I wrinkled my nose. We were a hardcore rock band. It was almost embarrassing to play our first gig in a place like this.

Triniti told me the band would be the first step to a new image. Drums came easy. I'd never had a formal lesson, but rhythm flowed in me. It was unstoppable. At least I finally had an outlet for the beats constantly pulsing in my head.

The drum set was already on stage, set up by our roadies, a few guys who all hoped to get in Triniti's pants. She teased them endlessly and strung them along like kittens after a ball of yarn. Triniti had a gift, one I was jealous of.

The Virgin Mary nickname wasn't far off. I'd kissed a couple of guys, but never anything that set my toes on fire. There'd been a little awkward touching, followed by me instinctively pushing them away. In the last year, though, nada. I felt like an iceberg, dry, frozen, and yearning for something to make me melt.

I sat down on my stool and spun a drumstick between my fingers. Years of boredom in school had led to me perfecting the pencil twirl. At least it came in handy now. I had to admit, I looked pretty damn cool spinning the black drumsticks with red fire painted on them.

"You ready, chica?" Triniti asked. She wasn’t Latina, but using Spanish slang somehow made her hotter to all of the guys. More exotic, if that was possible. Or it could have been the way she looked at them from fluttering eyelashes. Or her boobs that every other girl on the planet was jealous of.

"Yeah, I think so." Sweat trickled down the back of my neck. I wiped it away with my palm, and then smeared that on my dress. Gross. No wonder none of the guys ever looked at me. I was disgusting. I should have listened all of those times my mom told me to stop picking my nose and biting my nails. At least I didn't pick my nose anymore.

Triniti reached over with both hands and ruffled my hair. "We'll be great. We've practiced our asses off. Hard work always pays dividends." Triniti sang a few bars of our opening song, then smiled and sashayed to the front of the stage. Then she turned back to me. "Oh, by the way, the guys and I decided we'd end the first set with your new song. I don't know the words yet. I want you to sing it."

My chest deflated. Every miniscule ounce of confidence I'd forced myself to feel rushed out in one breath. "No."

"Yes," Triniti said, "and you'll enjoy yourself. You'll be awesome. Just wait until you hear all of the applause. It'll be a great confidence booster."

"Not on our first night. I won't do it." I tapped the edge of the cymbal with a drumstick, my hand on the golden metal, keeping the sound muffled. Drumming always calmed me. Heavy, pounding, frantic drumming. I couldn't do that here. Not in front of everyone. My soul would have to settle for a tiny tap.

"That's fine if you don't want to sing, but I'm going to announce you and the guys are going to start playing. If you don't go along you'll be far more embarrassed than if you tried. Everyone will see you choke. You'll be humiliated. You have a beautiful voice. It's far less horrifying if you just sing the damn song."

"Bitch," I mouthed at her.

"But you love me anyway." Triniti winked, and then spun around, her arms out to the side. She grabbed the mic in one hand. "Thanks to everyone who came out for our first gig. I promise you won't be disappointed."

One hip jutted out to the side and she struck a pose. Catcalls and whistles rose above the raucous cheers. Triniti was born to be a star and I was born to hide in the shadows. I would have to kill her later for putting me on the spot.

As soon as the bass strummed the opening notes, I closed my eyes and lost myself in the haunting music.

I pounded out the rhythm, driving the song harder and faster. The guitar twanged out, leaving me to tap out the final beats, ending with just my voice on a low G.

The room fell silent. I was too afraid to open my eyes and see them all sitting there, disgust on their faces. I shouldn't have ever thought I had any skill as a drummer, much less a singer-songwriter. Now the cool kids in school would know I sucked.

Then one set of hands started clapping. I opened my right eye just a little, staring into the bright stage lights. I couldn't see anyone other than Triniti, Troy, and Rick.

In a moment, the crowd erupted in crazed applause and screaming. Triniti turned around and squealed, "They love you! Oh my God, Raven, they love you!"

Even though Triniti was hot and totally full of herself, it never stopped her from being happy for anyone else. Her blinding white smile shone brighter than the blue lights beating on me.

A butterfly flittered in my heart, its wings beating into my soul until I wasn't sure I'd be able to breathe again.

"More! More! More!" The chant reverberated through the bar, pounding in time with my heart.

"That's the end of our first set," Triniti breathed into the microphone. The crowd booed even louder and started up their chant again.

Triniti whirled around, her eyes wide. "Tonight you've become a star. Don't forget this moment."

I nodded, still unsure how to absorb it all. My whole life I'd been the quiet one in the corner, hiding behind my veil of black hair. No makeup, no edgy clothes, nothing to differentiate me from the other girls in our Catholic school.

Amidst the cheers, I slipped out the back of the stage, sure that I could do, or be, anything. I could leave behind the little girl I'd been just days before, replaced by this chick who didn't take shit from anyone. The next person to call me Virgin Mary was going to get an earful.

I strode down the dark hall backstage, looking for the dressing room I was sharing with Triniti. A sickly, sweet smell permeated the hallway when a strong arm reached out and grabbed mine, thrusting me up against the wall.

"What kind of shit do you think you're pulling here? I warned you today at school to leave everyone alone. But now you're here, putting them under your spell."

"What are you talking about, you freak?" I struggled against his grasp, but couldn't break free. My bicep throbbed in pain as his fingers dug in deeper. Even in the dark, I knew it was Ian, that guy Triniti warned me about. She was right. He was a total asshole.

"I know what you are, Raven. This little Catholic schoolgirl thing you've got going is a joke. My father warned me years ago you'd be coming. He told me you'd disguise yourself. He said you'd tempt me...”

His other hand brushed my cheek lightly. He leaned in closer, his grip on my arm loosening. His lips sped toward mine. I couldn't even take in a sharp breath before they found their target. Heat spread through my body, from my head to my toes. I couldn't stop myself. I wrapped my arms around him, my lips and body responding to every primal urge. My fingers trailed up and down his back as his tongue darted between my lips.

I groaned, my hands grabbing his ass. It was so firm, so damn perfect. As his hands traveled lower, I remembered I wasn’t wearing any underwear. What would he think? But when his fingers brushed the tops of my hips, I decided I didn’t care.

He pulled out of my grasp, stumbling backward until his back slammed into the wall.

"It isn't possible." He glared at me, back to the jerk who'd accosted me in the hall instead of the guy I’d been ready to inhale.

“What?” Thoroughly confused, I didn’t know whether to lust after him or call the cops.

“You have a soul.” His eyes glowed in the dark, a strange blue color, like the sea before a storm.

“Are you high?” Years of Catholic school and even I didn’t talk about souls in front of total strangers. I tried to see if his pupils were enlarged. I hadn’t smelled anything strange onstage, but I was pretty sure he’d been smoking something illegal.

“You have a soul. It isn’t possible…” He grabbed his head with his hands, rocking back-and-forth on his heels. “I could have killed you. Are you okay?”

“Um, yeah. All we did was make out, which is a mistake I’ll never repeat again.” He was getting weirder by the second, twitching his shoulders up and down. Maybe he had some kind of medical condition. Tourette’s? Triniti would have told me. No, this was something different.

“I have to get out of here.” He grabbed my hand, pulling me to him again. “You’re an enigma, Raven. One I plan on solving.” His thumb stroked along my cheek.

My breath caught in my throat like a trapdoor had just been closed, cutting me off from the very air that kept me alive.

I blinked … and he was gone.

A hand grabbed my arm from behind. I whirled around, expecting Ian, but it was Triniti.

“You look like you just saw a zombie. You okay? Did your first moment of fame freak you out?”

I glanced down the hall, but Triniti and I were alone. One dingy light bulb undulated from a wire, like a lone swing on a windy day. The dim light bounced off the concrete walls giving Triniti’s face a sinister glow.

“No, I’m okay.” For a moment I wondered if I’d imagined the whole thing. Maybe the excitement of my first performance being heralded a success had led to some strange visions. But as I followed Triniti back to the stage, a hint of sweet spiciness hung in the air.

The next morning at school, I tried to trudge through the halls with my head down like yesterday, but today was different. Now everyone knew me. If they hadn’t been at last night’s performance, they’d heard about it. While not everyone thought I was amazing, they all had an opinion. It was enough to make me an instant star.

“Hey, Raven, great show last night.”

I nodded at the redheaded girl and smiled. I had no idea who she was, or if I’d ever seen her before.

“Come here, love,” Triniti whispered in my ear, her arm thrown around my shoulder, “I have a question to ask you.”

I waved to the girl who’d talked to me and walked away with Triniti. “What’s up?”

“Something happened last night. Something you didn’t tell me about. Now, spill.”

Last night, we went back out and played the final set, then Triniti dropped me off at my house. I didn’t tell her about Ian. It was all so weird.

“Um.” I bit my lip. How did she find out? No one else had seen us.

Triniti sighed and pulled out her iPhone. She swiped her thumb across the screen a few times, and then clicked once. “You’re on You Tube. And you’ve already got over a hundred thousand hits. In one song you not only conquered the school, but you’re taking over the world! Our band is gonna be famous with you as our face!”