No Boundaries (12 page)

A warm pleasing feeling filled Andi as she allowed her hand to drift until her fingers brushed Gwen’s hand. She was glad she had decided to ask Gwen to come to the lake with her. She was happy to have a new memory of her favorite place to keep with her forever. She knew she wasn’t keeping her promise to put distance between herself and Gwen, but the more she was around Gwen, the more she wanted to believe she could have a different life, that she was safe and Gwen was safe and maybe, just maybe, she could be happy. A warning pricked at the back of her mind telling her that wasn’t possible, but she pushed it away. She wanted to pretend things were different. Just for one day, she wanted to be happy.

She felt Gwen’s hand slide into hers and smiled when their fingers laced together. Andi took a deep soothing breath. She had this one perfect day and she was very happy.

The day had been remarkable so far, and Andi couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt so…normal. For the past four years she had believed her chance at happiness had passed. Meeting Gwen had opened a world of possibilities that she prayed were real but dared not hope for.

Andi put on some music and began to do the prep work for dinner. She embraced the music, letting her body sway to the rhythm until she was dancing around the kitchen, singing along with the lyrics. She hadn’t danced in years, but she was having the best day she could remember and dancing felt good. She jumped at the sound of the knock at the door. She turned to see Gwen standing at the door grinning, and she felt her cheeks grow hot with embarrassment.

“How long have you been standing out here?” she said as she opened the door.

“Not very long. Nice song, I like your voice.”

Andi buried her face in her hands. “Oh God, you heard me?”

“Just a little,” Gwen said. “The dance was cute too.”

Andi swatted Gwen lightly on the arm. “Now you’re just being mean. I lost track of time and wasn’t expecting you so soon. You weren’t supposed to see or hear any of that.”

“Sorry, but you’re busted. Don’t stop on my account. I was enjoying the show.”

Andi sighed, resigning her dignity. There was nothing she could do about it now. That’s what she got for making fun of Gwen earlier.

“Come on in and have a seat. What would you like to drink?”

Gwen held up the bottle of wine she had brought along. “I brought this. I couldn’t just show up empty-handed. But I’ll have a beer if you have any.”

Andi retrieved the beer for Gwen, opening one for herself. She watched the way Gwen settled into her chair, an air of belonging in the way she draped herself, legs outstretched and an arm casually thrown over the back of the chair. Andi found she liked the gesture and was happy Gwen was so relaxed with her. What pleased her even more was how comfortable she was with Gwen. Gwen just seemed to fit into her life.

They grilled steaks and portobello mushrooms paired with a light salad. Night fell all too quickly—time melted away when she was with Gwen. She knew it wouldn’t be long now before Gwen would go, and she would be left alone again in her silent home with her silent thoughts. She wasn’t ready for the day to end. She had been so lonely before meeting Gwen, and she was tired of that life. Maybe she couldn’t have forever, but she had right now. The thought was exhilarating.

She felt Gwen’s hand slide across her arm with a smooth caress that was so faint it could have been a breeze. The touch drew her out of her thoughts, and when she looked up, she met Gwen’s inquisitive gaze.

“What were you thinking just now?”

Andi looked at her, blinking away her loneliness. “Nothing really, just how quickly the day has gone by. I’ve had a really good day and I hate to see it end.”

Gwen looked at her watch. “Are you tired? Should I go?”

The suggestion startled Andi, and she was surprised by her reaction. She was afraid that if she let Gwen go, the spell would be broken and the magic that had surrounded this one perfect day would vanish. “No, please, just the opposite. I’ve enjoyed being with you so much today I felt a little sad when I thought of you leaving. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. I’m having a good time with you too.”

Andi met Gwen’s eyes, telegraphing her gratitude. She smiled warmly at Gwen and placed her hand on her shoulder and let her fingers glide down the length of her arm.

“How long did you say you’ve lived here?” Gwen asked curiously.

“Oh, I guess it’s coming up on three years now.”

“Have you always lived here alone?”

Andi knew what Gwen was asking. She wanted to know more about her, and Andi wondered how much she should share. The truth would mean the end of this fairy tale, and she wasn’t quite ready for that.

“Yes, it’s always just been me.”

“No girlfriends?”

Andi was thoughtful for a moment before answering. “No, I haven’t dated anyone since moving here.” The familiar hollowness had begun to fill her chest as she tried to answer Gwen’s questions. There was a very good reason why she didn’t date and here she was, breaking her own rules. She could continue to lie to herself that what they were doing wasn’t dating, but her heart knew she already cared too much for Gwen to just be friends.

“Does it bother you that I’m asking you about your personal life?”

Andi looked away, suddenly focused on the flickering candle flame. “I guess it does. It isn’t something I’m used to talking about.”

“Should I stop?”

It would have been easy for Andi to push Gwen away, to refuse to answer or find a clever way of avoiding the discussion, but she knew the conversation was unavoidable and didn’t want to rebuild barriers between them. She wasn’t ready to share the whole truth, but she decided on honesty instead.

“No. You can ask. But there may be some things I decide to keep to myself.”

“Fair enough. Tell me something about yourself. Tell me about your family.”

“Hmm, I’m not sure that’s a safe topic. I’m the only child of parents who were only children. They both died when I was young. I don’t really have any family.” She wasn’t used to talking about her life, but Gwen had been so patient with her, she found sharing some of her past comforting. She wanted to trust Gwen with her story.

Gwen shifted in her chair, and Andi knew her answer had made Gwen uncomfortable.

“That must be really hard,” Gwen said, her voice softer than before.

“For a long time it was. But luckily I grew up and built a life of my own. Now it just seems like it’s the way things have always been. I don’t think about it much anymore.”

“Where did you live after your parents died?”

“I was a state custody kid. I moved from group homes to foster homes as they were available. I was lucky and met some really caring people along the way who made a difference.”

“I’m sorry, Andi.”

“It’s okay. It was all a long time ago and, like I said, I built my own life.” Andi drew her hand through her hair and sighed, ready to change the subject. She didn’t want to bombard Gwen with too much information all at once. “Now it’s your turn, tell me about your family.”

Gwen laughed softly. “I come from a brood of people. I have two brothers and a sister. My parents are still married and having the time of their lives being grandparents to my nieces and nephews.”

“Do you miss them?”

“Oh yeah, I think that’s been the hardest part of the move. I’d gotten used to seeing them almost every week. I promised I’d make trips home for the holidays and things like that, and we talk on the phone almost every day. But I still miss them.”

It was comforting to hear about the closeness of Gwen’s family, and Andi loved the look in Gwen’s eyes when she talked about them. Gwen was someone who was used to having a large family, being close to people, sharing her life with those she had known forever. She could see Gwen’s love for her family as her expression brightened and light glinted in her eyes while she talked. Andi couldn’t imagine that closeness with anyone, and the thought made her melancholy. She remembered her parents, but the memories seemed vague and distant, as if she were remembering scenes from a movie, instead of something she had actually lived.

“Your family sounds wonderful,” Andi said reverently.

“They are. I know they don’t understand my decision to move away, but they’re supportive, and I guess it’s their job to give me a hard time.”

After some time, Gwen yawned and stretched. “It’s getting late. I should be heading home. Thank you for dinner, and the wonderful day.” She stood and reached for Andi’s hand, pulling her up from her chair the way she had done the day she’d brought Andi home after the ordeal with Zeek.

Andi felt a rush of anticipation quickly followed by fear. Gwen pushed a strand of hair back from Andi’s face and brushed her fingers across her cheek. Andi held her breath as Gwen moved closer. She wanted so much to feel the softness of Gwen’s lips, but as they had talked she had realized she couldn’t be the woman Gwen wanted. She didn’t know how to be a part of a family. A family was something she could never have. She thought she had accepted that, but Gwen had made her want things she hadn’t dared dream of before. How could she explain the things that had been done to her and the threat that still lingered in the shadows? She couldn’t expect Gwen to live a life of uncertainty, anticipating the worst the way she did.

Andi started to pull away. “Gwen, I don’t think this is a good idea.”

“You think too much,” Gwen whispered.

She had felt so close to Andi throughout the day and she couldn’t bear to feel her pull away now. She had wanted to reach out to Andi when she talked about growing up without her parents. Gwen had wanted to comfort her and heal her wounds. She couldn’t imagine what Andi’s life had been like. Every part of her soul wanted to wrap around Andi and soothe her.

Her breath caught and she looked from Andi’s eyes to her lips, arousal spreading through her, making her tremble. She could see the desire darkening Andi’s eyes despite her hesitation. Andi’s lips were moist and parted slightly in invitation, and Gwen couldn’t hold back any longer. She thought she would combust if Andi didn’t kiss her.

“Please, Andi.”

“Yes,” Andi whispered, then leaned forward and closed the distance between them.

Andi sighed and dissolved against her. At the touch of Andi’s lips, Gwen was soaring. When Andi’s hands slid around her shoulders and tightened the embrace, Gwen’s lips became more searching, and she clung to Andi, the pressure of the kiss insistent and passionate. She couldn’t get enough. Andi was consuming her.

Gwen had never felt such tenderness before and knew she had not been truly alive until that moment, when she joined with Andi. She was floating. Her body disconnected from her mind. All her focus shifted to the feel of Andi’s mouth on hers. She was filled with longing and her body tingled from head to toe. Each stroke of Andi’s tongue sent waves through her body until she was no longer connected to the earth. The only thing keeping her together was the feel of Andi’s body against hers and the pressure of strong arms caressing her.

Andi whimpered, belatedly realizing the sound, a mix of pleasure and need, came from her. She knew she should stop but couldn’t. Gwen just felt too good. She had given herself one day of happiness, and there could be no better ending than in Gwen’s arms.

Gwen held Andi close to her even as their lips parted. Andi could feel Gwen’s gaze and her arousal became an insistent throb in her center.

“You amaze me,” Gwen whispered.

Andi dropped her head against Gwen’s chest. Her hand slid down from Gwen’s shoulders, and she drew small circles with her fingers against the fabric of Gwen’s shirt over her collarbones. She drew in a deep breath, gently pushed against Gwen, and took a small step back.

Gwen’s hands loosened and trailed light touches down her arms until Gwen was holding both her hands.

“Andi?”

Andi tried to steady her breathing and struggled to regain control of her body. If she didn’t put some distance between them, she would be unable to stand much longer. Her thoughts raced. She wanted Gwen. Her want was more than seemed possible. But somehow she had found the strength to stop. She tightened her fingers around Gwen’s hand and tugged, leading Gwen out the front door toward her car.

Gwen followed without a word. At the car she turned, and Andi thought she would melt from the desire she saw in Gwen eyes. Gwen’s smile was tender and reassuring, and Andi knew Gwen wouldn’t push this time. But she suddenly found it difficult to meet Gwen’s eyes. She was afraid if she looked at her again, she wouldn’t be able to let her go.

Gwen squeezed Andi’s hand, lingering a moment. “Good night, Andi.” She leaned in and kissed Andi’s cheek as she had that morning.

“Good night,” Andi said as Gwen got into the car. She could still feel the heat of Gwen’s lips on her skin as she watched Gwen drive away. “Thank you for a perfect day,” she whispered into the darkness.

The store was open on Saturdays but closed on Sundays and Mondays. Andi had found that very few people ever came in the store on Mondays, so she’d adopted them as her official weekend. Despite the reprieve, she was up early, consumed by thoughts of Gwen. When they had said good night, Andi had felt a sense of loss. Her body was so charged with sexual energy she found she couldn’t rest. It had taken her forever to fall asleep and she was up by dawn. She had weeded the back garden, watered the flowers, cleaned the kitchen, and was now gathering her things to head out for a long bike ride. But despite how busy she kept herself, she kept wondering what Gwen was doing. The lingering thrill of Gwen’s lips sent shivers through her, making her weak in the knees.

She shook her head at her growing infatuation. She knew it wouldn’t be fair for her to bring Gwen into her haunted world where she never knew if she was safe. But now that she had held her, tasted her lips, and brushed against her soul, how could she live without her?

Andi focused on the hum of her tires on the smooth pavement and the smell of fresh-cut grass that permeated the air as the lawn service got an early jump on the day. She allowed her energy to flow through her body, and she pushed herself up the many hills along her route until her legs burned, weak from fatigue.

By the time she rode back through town, her skin was hot and her clothes drenched with sweat. Although her body was tired, she felt exhilarated. Riding always gave her a feeling of freedom that she imagined was most like flying. On the bike she was in control. All of her attention had to be on the path ahead of her, the pace and distance of the traffic around her, and the energy pouring out through her limbs pushing her forward.

She couldn’t wait to get home and plunge into the pool to cool off. There was nothing like the sensation of cool water surging across her hot skin after a long ride. Although she did feel a little guilty for not completing her weekly Sunday run, she figured that since she spent Sunday with Gwen on the lake, her lapse was justified. The ride had been just what she needed, and she knew if she went for a run today she would have gone by Gwen’s house. At the mere thought of seeing Gwen, she felt a twinge of excitement.

Her response to Gwen’s kiss the night before had shown her just how weak she was to her physical attraction. She couldn’t risk allowing her sexual desires to dictate her behavior. She just needed to stay in control. She didn’t have to act on her feelings. She rode on, trying to purge herself of her need for Gwen and get her mind back on track.

Andi looked up as she pushed her way up the final hill leading to her house and almost rode into the ditch when she saw Gwen standing in front of her house talking with Mrs. Peterson. Oh crap! What was Gwen doing here? And what was she doing talking to Mrs. Peterson?
Great, now Mrs. Peterson is going to be poking around in my personal life.

She brought the bike to a stop beside the two women.

“Hi, Mrs. Peterson, Gwen,” she said making brief eye contact with each. “What are you two up to?”

“Well, speak of the summer peach, there you are. I was just talking with Gwen here,” Mrs. Peterson said in an unusually cheerful tone. “Seems she was looking for you this morning. I tried to explain that you are a hard one to nail down, always having to be doing something or the other. Just look at you, red as an apple and sweating so much you look like someone turned the hose on you.”

Gwen was just standing there watching the exchange, looking very amused by the old woman’s demeanor. Andi felt her cheeks grow warm as an entirely different heat spread through her. She hoped her discomfort was masked by the heat of exertion that still burned her face.

“Nice bike,” Gwen said. “I’ve always been a fan of Orbea.” Gwen gestured toward the bike, and Andi was grateful to Gwen for moving the attention away from her.

“How was your ride?” Gwen asked a moment later.

Andi smiled warmly at Gwen. “It was great, thanks. Umm, would you two like to come inside for some tea and maybe lunch?”

“How wonderful,” Mrs. Peterson answered, surprising Andi. “I would love a good glass of tea. It’s hot as a wiener roast in hell out here.”

Andi looked at Mrs. Peterson, dumbfounded. In all the years she had been asking her in for tea, Mrs. Peterson had never, not even once, taken her up on the offer. Now here she was, eager to come inside like it was the most common thing in the world.

Gwen grinned. “Sounds good to me.”

Andi pushed her bike up to the back entrance and into the house, leaning it gently against the wall. She pulled off her shoes and padded barefoot across the floor. She led the two women into the kitchen where she washed her hands and pulled three tall glasses from the cupboard. She retrieved the carafe of tea from the fridge and brought it to the table. She could see Mrs. Peterson steadily taking in all the changes she had made to the old house in the last three years.

Apparently satisfied with her assessment of the kitchen, Mrs. Peterson turned to Gwen. “So tell me dear, how is the old house coming?”

“Very well, thank you. I think it’s habitable at this point. I can actually cook a meal now that doesn’t require using the outdoor grill. I’m very pleased with the changes.”

“And what do you think of the renovations, Andi?”

Andi stiffened slightly at the question, understanding that Mrs. Peterson was trying to find out how much time Andi and Gwen had been spending together. She was sure Mrs. Peterson had seen Gwen’s Land Rover in her drive the previous evening.

“Oh, I think Gwen’s doing a wonderful job with the place. She has a good eye for it.”

“That’s good, that’s good. I’m glad to see you’ve been helping out our new neighbor. It’s always so nice to feel welcome in a new place.”

Mrs. Peterson turned her attention back to Gwen again. “Are you as crazy about all this running and bike riding and all that madness as Andi is?”

Gwen chuckled. “I guess I am. I haven’t been on my bike since I moved here, but I’m happy with the things I’ve experienced so far.”

Andi warmed, hoping Gwen was thinking of their time together.

“Maybe you should get Andi here to show you around a bit. I’m sure she knows all the places to go. Isn’t that right, Andi?”

“I guess so.” Andi studied Mrs. Peterson over the rim of her glass as she took a drink of her tea. She was perplexed by the questions. What was the old woman up to? It seemed Mrs. Peterson was trying to make sure Andi and Gwen spent time together, something Andi thought was very odd. Come to think of it, the old woman had been acting strange for weeks now.

Andi decided to turn the tables on Mrs. Peterson. “How’s Churchill? I’m surprised he isn’t with you today.” Andi hoped if she got Mrs. Peterson distracted, she could avoid any further inquiries.

“Stubborn as a mule. You know, he wouldn’t even come outside this morning. I guess he thought it was just too hot for a walk. He just sat there on his pillow staring at me like he had never seen me before in his life. When I hooked his lead onto his collar, he just lay down and groaned at me. Wouldn’t budge an inch.”

“He hasn’t run out of his banana biscotti has he?”

“I take it Churchill is your dog?” Gwen asked.

Andi chuckled, “He’s the sweetest basset hound you have ever met and very strong willed.”

“Strong willed my rear end,” Mrs. Peterson scoffed. “He’s a stubborn ass.”

Both Andi and Gwen laughed. Gwen coughed, almost choking on her tea.

“I tell you what, Mrs. Peterson, I’ll send Churchill a special batch home so you can butter him up. Maybe he’ll be a little more amenable if he thinks he’ll get something special. I’ve been trying out a new flavor.” Andi went to the pantry and retrieved two small gift bags of treats. She gave one to Mrs. Peterson and the other to Gwen. “You’ll have to tell me how he likes these. Churchill can be my new test market. Gwen, you can take some for Zeek as well.”

Mrs. Peterson smiled and took the offering. “You keep spoiling my dog this way, he’ll be as big as a house.”

“Maybe so,” Andi chuckled. “But at least he won’t be eating your garden shoes.”

“Humph.” Mrs. Peterson nodded. “Well, I best be off. Who knows what that troublesome lump of mutt is up to? I better get home. Thank you for the tea. It was good to see you again, Gwen.”

“You too, Mrs. Peterson.”

Andi walked Mrs. Peterson to the door. “You’ll have to come over again sometime.”

“I might just do that. You have good tea.” She smiled at Andi, patted her on the cheek with a weathered old hand, and ambled out the door.

Andi sighed. So much for keeping some distance, thinking of Gwen sitting in her kitchen.

She found Gwen still sitting at the kitchen table with a sly grin on her face.

“What?” she said, pretending to be annoyed.

“Sweet woman.”

Andi glared at her, trying to keep the smile from creeping into the corners of her mouth.

“I take it the neighbors are more than curious about what you’ve been up to. Does she come over and check out all your visitors?”

Plopping down in the chair, Andi rubbed her face in her hands. “Well, she might if I had visitors. To be honest that’s the first time she’s ever accepted one of my invitations. She’s never even been inside the house.”

Gwen looked shocked. “Seriously? Wow, she must really be rankled. You’ll have to tone down those late-night dinner parties you’ve been throwing.”

“Ha-ha. It seems to be you she’s interested in. She’s never behaved that way before. And it sounds like she’s already paid you a visit. Maybe she has a crush on you.”

“That’s it,” Gwen said raising her eyebrows. “We’re secret lovers. Didn’t I tell you I had a weakness for older women?”

Andi laughed. The friendly play was so natural she forgot all her earlier worries.

“Mrs. Peterson and two other women from the church stopped by to visit me at my house a few days ago. As I recall, she was very interested in whether or not I’d been to your store. Maybe she’s jealous.”

“I doubt that,” Andi chuckled. “So, what brings
you
by?”

“Well”—Gwen took a long drink of her tea—“I was hoping I could repay you for your hospitality and offer to cook you dinner tonight. I have the kitchen all ready to go, and I’m dying to try it out—I hate to cook for myself. What do you say?”

This time Andi didn’t hesitate before answering. Seeing Gwen’s soft smile, her radiant blue eyes, and her scrumptious body made Andi melt. Of course she would say yes.

“I’d like that.”

“Great. How about five thirty? I already have everything planned out. You don’t even need to bring anything.”

A thrill ran through Andi at the thought that she would be seeing Gwen again later. “That’ll be great.”

“You know, you really should give me your phone number so I can just call you. If I keep showing up here, your neighbors are going to talk.” Gwen smiled her heart-stopping smile. “I’m sorry I just showed up out of the blue like this. Am I keeping you from anything?”

Andi couldn’t think. Had she been planning to do something? All she could think of now was Gwen’s warm mouth on hers. “Umm, no. Nothing really.” She looked out the window and saw the crystal blue water glistening in the sun and suddenly she remembered. “I was just going to go for a swim to cool off. Do you want to join me?”

Gwen seemed to consider it for a moment before answering. “Well, it does sound pretty inviting, but I don’t have a bathing suit. I’d have to go home and change.”

“You could just swim in your shorts and sports bra, or I could lend you a pair of board shorts. They may be a little snug on you, but they should be good enough.”

“Okay.”

“I’ll be right back.” Andi went into the bedroom to change and came back with a pair of red board shorts with a blue-and-white stripe at each side.

“These might work,” she said handing the shorts to Gwen. “You can change in the bathroom. I’ll be outside, come on out when you’re ready.”

Gwen smiled and took the shorts. She hadn’t anticipated getting to spend time with Andi, but she was very happy she had stopped by. The idea of seeing Andi in her bathing suit again made her heart race.

“I’ll just be a minute.”

“Take your time.”

Gwen stepped out onto the back porch a few minutes later to see Andi gliding beneath the crystal blue water. The muscles in her back rippled as she propelled herself through the water with her strong, lean arms. Her body was beautifully toned and held a tantalizing femininity that made Gwen go weak in the knees.

Gwen stepped to the edge of the pool just as Andi surfaced and threw her head back to push the wet hair and water away from her face.

“Hey, they fit,” she said, peering up at Gwen.

Gwen smiled. “Yeah, as long as I don’t do any serious squats. They’re a little snug in the butt.”

She turned to model the shorts and pointed out the slight tension in the fabric. She was pleased to see Andi’s eyes roam the length of her body.

“Looks good to me. Come on in, the water is fantastic.” Andi pushed off from the side of the pool and did a backstroke away from Gwen, never taking her eyes off her.

Gwen dipped a toe into the water before she stretched her long arms over her head and dove in, immediately curving her back so the momentum pushed her toward the surface. The water was perfect, the coolness just enough to be refreshing without the shock of cold.

“Wow. This is great,” she said as she turned to find Andi.

They swam and talked until the grumbling sounds of Andi’s stomach warned that it was long past time to eat.

“I’m going to grab a snack,” Andi said. “Would you like something?”

“No. I can wait until dinner. I had a light lunch before heading over here.”

“Suit yourself. I’ll be right back.”

Gwen watched Andi walk out of the pool, the water streaming off her body. The sun glistened off her golden tan, and Gwen felt the urge to suck the water from her skin and brush her fingers along the delicate curves. She was still lost in her fantasy when Andi returned, holding two more glasses of tea and a tray of cheese and crackers.