Read My Life as a Stuntboy Online
Authors: Janet Tashjian
My Life as a Stuntboy (15 page)
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This time Mom accompanies me to the set. She insists we leave early so we won't be stuck in traffic. When she asks if things are better with Matt and me, I say yes, even though they're anything but.
She gives our names to the guard at the gate, who talks about the weather for a few minutes before letting us in. Tony finds my mother
a chair, then asks me if I can do a few run-throughs before the director arrives. I tell him I can't wait.
a chair, then asks me if I can do a few run-throughs before the director arrives. I tell him I can't wait.
I follow Tony's lead and take several moments to examine my surroundings. The soundstage has been transformed into a giant junkyard, complete with fake rust, dirt, and discarded appliances. Together Tony and I plan the best route around the obstacles.
discarded
“If I start at the bathtub, then go around the statue and over the dented motorcycle, I can land on the mini trampoline and leap over the picnic table before climbing the fence. What do you think?” I ask.
Tony smiles. “That's exactly how I'd do it too.”
One of the production assistants tells Tony that the director is on her way, so Tony brings me to my mark, moves aside, and tells me to give it a go.
misjudge
I take a running start to jump over the bathtub. Except I miss.
My mother gets up from her chair to see if I'm all right. I'm grateful she doesn't come running over like she used to when I was little.
“Misjudge that jump?” Tony lends me his hand and pulls me out of the bathtub. “You okay?”
I tell him I'm fine and climb out. My mother moves her reading glasses up to the top of her head, which means she's now going to be watching me full-time. I head back to my mark and begin to run, but Tony stops me.
“Remember what we talked about the day I met you at UCLA?
Parkour is about making your way around obstacles. Whether it's a set of stairs or a problem at school, you need to plan the most efficient way around the hurdle.” He pans the artificial junkyard with his hand. “Take a good look, then implement your plan.”
Parkour is about making your way around obstacles. Whether it's a set of stairs or a problem at school, you need to plan the most efficient way around the hurdle.” He pans the artificial junkyard with his hand. “Take a good look, then implement your plan.”
implement
I try not to focus on the growing number of crewmembers watching us and concentrate instead on the best route to my goal. Tony reminds me to put safety before risk. This time when he tells me to go, I run, leap, and climb like it's the most natural thing in the world. When I'm done, he meets me at the fence and shakes my hand.
“Let's see if you're still One-Take Fallon today. But no pressureâtake as many tries as you need,” he says.
Tony introduces my mom to Collette, who is wearing red high-top sneakers, tights, and a hooded sweatshirt. Assistants hover around her with cell phones and coffee while she tells my mom how professional and smart I am. Mom nods politely, probably thinking about how I almost killed our monkey too.
When Collette yells “action!” I make the same mistake I made during rehearsal and land like a giant whale inside the tub. Tony and the director run over to see if I'm okay, but the only thing that hurts is my pride. I panic briefly when one of the assistants changes the chalk clapboard to SCENE 43, TAKE 2 but when it's time to go again, I sail through the junkyard heap like a pro.
The director shoots a few more
times from different angles, and I nail it every time. She thanks me profusely and tells the crew to set up for the next scene.
times from different angles, and I nail it every time. She thanks me profusely and tells the crew to set up for the next scene.
“Who knew all that jumping off the roof of the garage and swinging on the zipline would prepare you for your first job?” Mom pulls me in for a hug, then thinks better of it when she sees all the people around. She's finally catching on that I'm too old for that kind of affection.
profusely
Tony calls us over. “Tanya's shooting the next scene. You want to check it out?”
I look at Mom, who says she's happy to stay as long as I want. We follow Tony across the set to the fake backyard where Tanya sits under a tree with the actress who's playing her mother. The three of us
stand behind the director and out of Tanya's view.
stand behind the director and out of Tanya's view.
“You ready?” Collette asks Tanya.
She nods and then Collette yells, “Action!”
“Chris,” the actress mom says, “you have to stop talking about aliens. You're starting to worry me.”
“I'm telling you,” Tanya says, “they've moved indoors.”
Collette yells, “Cut!” and she approaches Tanya. From where we are, I can hear her directions.
furrowed
“The next line is âThey've moved next door.' You want to go again?”
Tanya nods. When Collette goes back to her place, the actress gives Tanya a wink and a smile, but her brow is furrowed.
The clapboard reads SCENE 31, TAKE 2. Tanya blows the line again. And again. And again.
Collette tells the crew to take a five-minute break and goes over to Tanya.
“What's going on?” Collette asks softly. “What do you need?”
My mother gives me a nudge that means it's time to go but I am riveted to my spot.
“It's hard to memorize so many lines,” Tanya says. “I've read the script a million times, but I just can't remember all the words.”
riveted
The director holds out her hand and lifts Tanya to her feet. Then the actress playing the mother gets up too. “Let's all go to your trailer and read the scene together,” Collette suggests.
Tanya nods and they walk over to the trailer on the edge of the set.
“See?” Mom whispers as we walk
to the car. “You're not the only one who has a hard time with words.”
to the car. “You're not the only one who has a hard time with words.”
I don't need her to translate what this means. Tanya Billings, teen megastar, has something in common with ME!
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Ms. McCoddle obviously doesn't know that Matt and I are no longer friends because she tells us we're partners for the class history project. When she calls out our names, I expect Matt to sneer, but instead he just looks quiet and sad.
She passes out a timeline worksheet and tells us it's due by the end of class. I pretend to look for my pen to buy myself some time before I have to face Matt.
Sneer
misfortune
“I took the video off YouTube,” he says. “You were rightâit was mean.”
I could just accept his apology, but I still feel pretty angry that he posted it at all. “What made you change your mind? Did Swifty and Joe get bored with you already?”
Matt shakes his head. “It's like making fun of somebody in a wheelchair trying to get down a curb or laughing at someone's misfortune. It's just not funny.”
“You thought it was funny the other day.”
He traces the doodles on his desk while he talks. “I don't know ⦠. With Tony picking you instead of me, I just felt left out. Then everyone in school had to make such a fuss.”
He looks like he's going to cry, and I know how that feels. I want to do anything to have him be good old Matt again, so I tell him it's okay. His face lights up just as Ms. McCoddle approaches our desks to tell us to get to work.
“It wasn't just that you were making fun of me. You could get in a lot of trouble for posting videos without someone's permission.”
“Believe me, I did. My dad was furious.”
I don't say anything, but inside, I'm not unhappy Matt got yelled at.
As we collaborate on the worksheet, I change the subject and tell Matt about Tanya Billings on the set yesterday. “It's not just me,” I say. “Lots of kids have a hard time studying.”
“No,” he answers. “It's mostly you.”
He shoots me a giant grin, and just like that, things are back to normal with my best friend.
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