Read My Expectation (My Escort Series Book 3) Online
Authors: Kia Carrington-Russell
M
y mind had fluttered over this new discovery over the two days that I stayed with my mother and Megan. If not distracted by my family, I was in my own world fantasizing about the possibilities. Much to my surprise I quickly adapted to the idea. I had never been overly maternal or thought much about children, but now having that future at hand both terrified and excited me. I very much looked forward to meeting this bundle that was growing inside of me.
I watched Ethan and Christian fight over a toy as if studying how I would find a solution to it. Parenting was a completely different challenge to anything else I had worked towards before. I loved my work and would continue my writing, but for some reason, no matter how much I had worked and only focused on my career beforehand, it seemingly now seemed irrelevant.
I sat there with my legs crossed bathing in the beautiful sun. How had I not ever really thought about this or considered it before? It was strange because since finding out, I hadn’t felt nauseous or sick since. The only time I grew uneasy was when I thought about telling Damon. I wanted so badly to call him, to tell him that I needed to see him immediately. But I knew he was still away on a conference and because of the distance there was between us, I just couldn’t call him.
My phone vibrated and I looked at the screen. Ironically, Damon had texted me.
‘I miss you. Let’s talk about it when we get back. I’ve booked out a place for dinner, meet me there?’ I relieved a bitter smile. I felt so foolish for how I had treated him and felt enlightened to know why my emotions had been such a roller coaster over the last few weeks. I didn’t want to use it as an excuse but I had heard farfetched stories of women and things they had done while pregnant. I felt slightly tame in comparison. Now that I knew why, at least I was aware of it and could try my hardest not to overreact in such ways.
I raised my knee and comfortably wrapped my arms around my leg and rested my chin. I text him back with a suspenseful sigh. ‘I miss you too. I would really like that, let me know where.’
I still contemplated how I would tell him, I even tried to prepare a speech. I didn’t think that he would hate it, but I wasn’t sure of how he would receive this information either. Was it too soon? Were we not committed enough? He was heartbroken by his high school sweetheart who had claimed to carry his child, and then he later found out before the birth it was his best friends. How much had that scarred him? Had he decided he didn’t want children after then?
I felt in my heart that he wouldn’t react in such a way but was still apprehensive about it. This wasn’t light news, and a large commitment, one which I didn’t deny. There was no alternative option. I hadn’t even considered aborting it. After the initial shock, I was happy about this. I wanted to have this child.
“Wow, could you look any more dazed?” Megan said as she walked outside. Hayden followed behind her. Ethan and Christian stopped fighting and instantly dropped the army figurines they were playing with and ran to him. Both of them ogled over him like he was a celebrity. In the sports world I suppose he was well known and successful with Zilch Enterprises. But they were children who only judged him as the person he was. Hayden never gave himself much credit, because of his tendencies to be well known with the ladies. He had a little scaring from his own childhood and I hoped that one day he views himself as we do now with him interacting with the boys.
“Can you show me that cool technique?” Ethan said giddily. Hayden smiled and was dragged towards the backyard. Christian had already grabbed the ball and was offering it to him.
“Only quickly because me and your Aunt Cloves have to hit the road,” he said. He grabbed the ball and began bouncing it on his knee with no fault. Megan and I watched over them with admiration, admittedly it was an adorable scene. I remember last time Damon and I came and he was the same. He played with the boys building odd shapes and buildings out of Lego. He raced around the backyard exhausting himself in the process.
“We have good men surrounding us,” I said randomly. Megan agreed. We both fell silent. I think that we were both thinking about Dad. It had been many years now since he passed. I still missed him and it pained my heart to not be able to talk with him still. No matter how often I had come to terms with it, it still made me feel fragile to have lost him so soon. I think he would’ve been proud with the men we surrounded ourselves with. Even if nothing happened between Hayden and Megan, which I highly doubted, he was just the male role model the boys needed with their alcoholic, abusive father absent. Damon was a good role model as well and they really thrived off the visits. We had to make time to visit more.
I smiled to myself. I wonder if I would have a little boy too, or maybe it was a girl. I didn’t want one more than the other, I was grateful for either. I knew that Damon would be a fantastic father and I fantasized about us as a family. I grew in strength. I needed to stop doubting his intentions. I very much think that after the initial shock, Damon will be happy to hear the news. I knew him and I loved him. This child was just another extension of that love, I was certain he would view it as the same and I believed in that, because the alternative was too heartbreaking to continue to worry about.
H
ayden and I spoke at length about some personal issues he had just been going through. Much to my surprise, he opened up and told me about a model named Amy who he had sort of been seeing. Ironically, as I kept my own secret hidden, he told me that she was claiming to be pregnant with his child. Amber, his personal assistant, who was very boisterous and intense, was very protective of Hayden. I hadn’t yet met her, but Megan had once worked with her for a while in a previous job at a warehouse years ago before she gave birth to Ethan. They recently began hanging out again because of the reconnection through Hayden. By the way Megan described her to me, she sounded as forward and rough as Megan could be, only with the Italian temper to back her up.
She was convinced it was a lie and made sure that nothing reached the public ear. After all the commotion and dramas of the situation, Hayden was able to prove that it wasn’t his. He felt both stupid and pained to know that she had tried to trick him after they’d known one another for so long and that she was only after the attachment to him for her own fame and pocket.
I felt rude by not opening up to him like he entrusted with me and telling him that I actually
was
pregnant, but I thought Damon had the right to be the first person to know–aside from my family. Hayden might have been what I considered as my best friend, but Damon still deserved to hear it first.
I comforted Hayden with kind words and he tried to charismatically palm them off. He told me months ago when he first came to Be True magazine that he was trying to find ‘the one’ and only
woman. I wasn’t sure how serious he was on that task but it certainly seemed to have him banging his head against a wall.
I wanted to ask him, if in a way he wished that she were pregnant as some form of commitment or sign for him. But I don’t think he yet knew the answer to that question himself. I just tapped him heartfelt on the shoulder and told him that he would find someone. I didn’t feel like teasing him about Megan right now. Everyone but those two around them saw how befitting they were as a couple.
Hayden mentioned that he was taking seriously a woman named Sarah, she sounded exotic and business minded. Hayden was a woman pleaser through and through and I think now that he actively searched for love. He realized how hard it was and that not just anyone can be the right fit.
It was different with Damon and me. I wasn’t looking, nor was he. We had both buried any thoughts of a relationship and lived our separate career driven lives until that very fateful night that we met and just couldn’t keep away from each other afterwards. We kept gravitating towards one another.
I had my hand rested on my stomach, an action which Hayden noticed but didn’t question. I couldn’t help it, I just couldn’t help but touch my stomach, I was so aware of it now. I felt foolish as I waited to see if I could feel something or just have an exterior visual to see that it was definitely true.
An hour before I met with Damon I borrowed Hayden’s motel bathroom to get changed and do my makeup and hair. He too was readying himself for a date he had that night with this woman, Sarah. He looked rather sharp in his suit and blue silk tie and did it up efficiently himself. I was too often in the habit of helping Damon with his now. He could do them himself but I enjoyed doing it for him.
I put on my free flowing green dress which had spaghetti straps and a simple gold necklace. I wanted to look nice tonight, I wanted to glow for him. I wanted it to be a perfect moment as I told him this news. I wanted him to see me and be stunned, to think that I was his everything. I didn’t think our fight was too serious that I should be worried that we were going to break up or anything like that, but my heart still pained at the thought. There was always a chance that something might happen. What if our communication wasn’t properly reaching and we were on different wave lengths? I pushed away those thoughts and pushed aside my hair to clip the necklace.
I applied some natural colors to my face and happily assessed how I looked. I was looking for an evident bump but couldn’t see one in the free flowing dress. Strangely enough I stood to the side and wrapped my hand below my belly so I could see. It wasn’t a large bump, it simply looked like I had eaten far too much over a Christmas season. But there it was, the start of something which would only grow.
Hayden walked into the bathroom exchanging with me an odd glance. I dropped my hand instantly and reshuffled my hair. He went to say something and then decided not to.
“Are you ready?” he asked instead. I think Hayden knew already. I wondered if Megan had told him, but I doubted that as well. I supposed my actions were rather obvious. I didn’t mean to incline it to him, I was just full of apprehension myself and was still adjusting to the news myself.
“I’m ready,” I said. I placed some high beige heels on and walked behind him and out of the motel. Hayden knew the place he was taking me to. I was nervous and butterflies began to fill my belly. Again in my insecurities I found myself holding my stomach. I wanted him to come to love this child, as much as I had already found myself starting to.
I
have never been to this place before. I looked at the high architectural building that Hayden parked in front of. He walked around the front of his sports car and opened my door. He took my hand and helped me out. I looked at the building with suspicion.
“This isn’t a restaurant, are you sure you have the right place?” I asked him. Hayden charmed me with a smile.
“Who said he was taking you to a restaurant,” he said. “Come with me, I will take you to him.”
“Now I am scared,” I said at the build-up of it. He smiled charmingly and locked his arm around mine chivalrously. I had to admit that Hayden looked very dashing tonight, but he never stood against Damon, not in my comparison. My heart pounded at this twist, I was expecting some normal restaurant where we could talk and others would surround us. But this place seemed eerily quiet with only a few apartment lights on. The night was warm with a slight breeze which rustled my hair.
We walked into the building which was of average class for a block of apartments. It had an interesting smell to it, which only made me more nervous as to where we were going and why. “Are you sure?” I repeated. Surely this couldn’t be the right place. Hayden smiled and led me to the elevator. We waited while listening to the light piano music that played. I looked back at the reflection of myself in the mirror. I did feel beautiful. My chest rose up and down as it dawned on me I was about to see Damon, it felt like it had been far too long. What was I going to say to him, how was I going to say it?
The elevator doors opened and Hayden escorted me out and up two flights of stairs. At the end of those stairs were the doors to the rooftop. Hayden opened the door for me with an elegant smile. “All yours my love,” he said. I hesitated to step out.
In front of me there were sparkling fairy lights. They both led towards the dining table and chairs which were central near the edge of the building. There were candles which lit up the strip and circled the table. The fairy lights wrapped around few of the clotheslines and some candles lightly glowed on the cemented and potted vegetable gardens which closed in the edges of the building.
I saw the outline of Damon’s broad shoulders as he wore a suit and looked out over the city. I slowly began to walk to him. My stomach was heavy and I felt like my heart had stopped. Some light music played in the background adding to the ambience. On my right were rows of large white sheets hanging over the clothes line which blocked the view of the city. But in front of me, as the lights dazzled beneath me breathtakingly, Damon stood tall.
I now realized how high this building was and how much it overlooked the city of New York which I loved so much. The sheets lightly swayed in the wind. I looked back to where Hayden was once standing but he was no longer there and the doors were closed. I fixated on Damon’s broad back again, he still hadn’t realized I was there yet.
It was a warm night yet the small breeze that swept at this height gave me slight goose bumps. The sky was perfectly clear and the moon and stars glistened beautifully. There was a bottle of champagne in a bucket of ice on the table and two trays which were covered to keep the heat in. Some strawberries, chocolate, cheese and crackers were on the side.
Damon looked over his shoulder realizing he was no longer alone. He looked like he had restless sleeps but still heartbreakingly handsome. He wore a black well-fitted suit and a black silk tie. He took his hands out of his pocket and swooned me.
“I’m so sorry, Clover, I really didn’t mean anything by it. I never wanted to upset you,” he gushed. He slowly placed his hand on my elbow, as if feeling if I would receive his touch or not. How I had missed him in those short few days. I felt like the worst woman in the world to have put a man as powerful and confident as Damon in my mercy after I had acted so childishly.
“You have nothing to apologize for, I acted bashfully and dramatically. I really don’t want to fight with you.” I curled my hand over his face and cupped his firm jaw. “I’ve missed you far too much.”
“You don’t get upset often, I had done something to hurt you and I will not forgive myself for that,” he said savoring my touch. “I love you so much.”
“I love you too,” I said. I wanted to tell him. To just rush in and blurt out the truth behind my mood swings but it had no tact. He stepped closer to me, leaving no space between us. He stared at my eyes adoringly. His beautiful mystified gleam had me buckling at my knees, he was so gorgeous and so very mine.
He slowly leant in and brushed his lips against mine, as if testing to make sure that it was okay. I still cupped his face, stroking the rough of his facial hair as I inhaled the warmth of his breath. His tongue pressed against mine and antagonized me sensually. He was sweet, cautious and so very Damon.
“I love you so much,” he breathed. He rested his forehead to mine. “I don’t think you will ever understand how much.”
“I do,” I said almost in tears as I stroked the side of his face. I loved him so much and felt so stupid for fighting over nothing.
“I have never met anyone like you Clover Granture, and every day that you are in my life makes me realize I couldn’t live another without you. I’ve been wanting to do this for a while but was scared that it was too soon or I might frighten you away. I guess I was insecure that you wouldn’t want the same that I did,” he breathed heavily.
“Of course I want what you want, I don’t want to be without you,” I said quickly and reassuringly. Damon fiddled in his jacket for a moment. He took a deep insecure breath, it was so different to his usual controlled and confident self. He pulled out a small black velvet box.
“What is that?” I asked. Damon still held my hand and bent down on one knee. My heart stopped and my whole body felt as if it went limp.
“Clover, I love and adore you more than anything in this world. I honestly cannot be complete without you. I need you to be in my life every day. I have never been more certain of anything in my life.” The wind whistled through us as his words hinged. I hadn’t breathed the entire time and I felt like the world was spinning around us in bright city and candle lights of New York. He opened the box to reveal a white gold ring with a large diamond and sprinkles of smaller ones that wrapped around the band. Tears began to stream down my face as my entire body pumped with adrenalin. “Clover Granture, will you marry me?”
I sucked in a large breath of air and cried. I dropped to my knees in front of him, so overwhelmed by what was actually happening. Through my blurred vision he looked frightened and the only word I could sob out, so he knew I wasn’t in anyway rejecting him was, “Yes.” I sobbed and tried to make my voice louder. “Yes.” I choked back laughter and tears as he lifted me from the ground and spun me around in a circle excitedly.
He stopped and pressed his lips to mine. “You will really be mine forever?” he reiterated with excitement, pressing little kisses to my lips. “I love you so much.” I had never seen his smile so large and I only nervously laughed more as he placed the ring on my finger.
“It’s beautiful,” I cried even more. He pressed a charming kiss to the ring and my hand.
“The main diamond was my mothers,” he said proudly. I tried to wipe away the tears that continued to stream and he happily tried to help me wipe them away. “Hey this is a good thing.”
“I know,” I cried. “I am so happy.” I felt pathetic as I continued to stream tears, I was so happy and for some reason this was the only way that I could express it. The realization of the news I had to tell him dawned on me. I looked at him seriously and his face dropped.
“What’s wrong?” I choked on my first attempt to say it and locked my eyes with his.
“I’m pregnant.” His eyes almost seemed to pop as he stood silently there in shock. The wind swept through us as he continued to stare. It was like watching a reflection of how I first processed it. There was a moment where the words just weren’t truly sinking in. He looked at my stomach, like I had been doing the same. His hand gravitated to it silently. He looked back at me with an unreadable expression.
“Pregnant?” he asked.
“I think I am probably about three or four months,” I said nervously still unable to read him.
“We’re going to have a baby?” He reiterated still in shock. I nodded my head. A spark swept over him and he jolted back to life. “Are you serious?! I’m going to be a Dad?”
He lifted me again, much to my surprise and spun me around. He kissed me again and again and grabbed me shaking me up and down as he jumped in joy. I had never seen Damon act like this. I laughed at him still wiping away tears.
“You’re going to be a Dad,” I said with tears streaming down my face. He took my breath away with one fast kiss.
“Clover, you have made me the happiest man alive today. You have given me a gift no other could have given me.” He dropped to his knees and rested his head on my stomach. “Thank you.” I swept my fingers through his hair. This whole night was something most unexpected. We were such controlled and poised people and yet right now we cried, jumped and acted giddily and the most youthful we have ever seemed. I imagined that no one else had seen this side of us, besides one another. I had certainly never predicted that Damon would react in such a way.
“Are you really okay with this?” I confirmed still slightly self-conscious. He looked up at me with an earnest smile.
“Clover, you have both blessed me tonight with your hand in marriage and my own child. I couldn’t be any happier with my life right now. Only you could have ever completed it in such a way.” He kissed my stomach lovingly. “I could never thank you enough for the life you have brought me. I can’t remember how I even functioned before. I love and am purely devoted to you and our family.”
The word ‘family’ seemed to roll off his lips. It sounded so right and that it did complete us. I never realized how lonely it seemed with only the two of us until now. My mother’s words came to mind.
‘Everything changes, you will see.’
“Ow,” I heard Hayden’s voice which made me look over towards the direction of the sheets.
“Stop teasing them,” Megan’s familiar voice said. I raised my eyebrows and looked down at Damon. He had a large knowing smile. He kissed my stomach one more time and stood. He kissed me on the cheek and called out.
“You two come out, you both failed at your task,” Damon said with amusement.
“Task?” I asked. Megan and Hayden walked out from behind the sheets. Megan had a camera in her hand.
“He kind of requested that I record the proposal. I might have had a secret satisfaction in waiting to see how he reacted to ah, other things,” Megan said with a promiscuous smile.
“You’re pregnant!” Hayden said in shocked seriousness. He seemed more stunned than Damon’s reaction.
“Hey lover boy,” Megan teased Damon. “Offer me a good enough birthday present this year and I will show you the photo I took of Cloves when she found out she was pregnant.”
Damon’s eyes lit up with excitement. He had his hands around my waist comfortably and tightly.
“No,” I said firmly with amusement. In a way it felt right that Hayden and Megan were here for this. They were two of the people that I was closest to and it made me happy to know that Damon trusted them as much as me.
“Her expression was just as blank as yours, but for like hours,” Megan began to laugh.
“You’re too evil,” Hayden growled at her in my defense. He looked at us both with an acknowledging smile. “Congratulations. You two really deserve it.” He grabbed Damon’s hand and shook it proudly.
“Hayden,” Damon said with fondness. “Would you do me the honor of being my best man?” Hayden was genuinely surprised by this. A smile stretched over my face and tears began to stream down my cheeks again. I knew the two had gotten close over the past few months, but all of it seemed so overwhelming for me to handle.