Microsoft Word - Illicit Desires ePub.doc (24 page)

The only reason, my butt!

Yeah, right! Not the whole age crap again; we al know that’s not the real reason why I can't date…

You just want your perfect family to keep on looking perfect
—
not to mention your poor sick daughter.

"I'm old enough to know how to choose, and I'm big enough to take the responsibilities

of my choices, Dad."

My dad let out a long sigh, then I saw the hint of a smile forming on his lips.

Yes! Yes! Yes!

"Okay."

"So… That’s a
yes
?"

"Yes, Lily.
You
can say yes," he smiled.

"Thanks, Dad! You’re awesome." I bent down and kissed his cheek.

"You’re welcome, sweetie."'

I did the same with Mom. "Thanks, Mom."
A million thanks!

I walked over to Adrian and stood right in front of him, taking his orange juice in my

hand, challenging him once again, only with my eyes this time.

"I'll take that if you don't want it," I smiled.

He was red. It made something in me happy.

I leaned forward again, my lips just an inch away from his face. "I win,
dear brother
," I

whispered, then placed a kiss on his cheek.

When I was about to back away, he gripped my forearm and whispered back, "Over my

dead body,
little sister
."

We'l see about that!
I sent him a look that said,
'whatever, I don't care,'
and went to my room

so I could finish dressing.

I was really happy that I finally took the reins. Such a relief!

One thing was bothering me though… I had no idea who on earth I was going to force

into dating me!

I was
not
a jerk!

Well, not a
complete
jerk
… just a little bit.

So frustrating. I tried everything I could with her, everything I fucking knew. I tried

being nice. I tried being good. I tried being … well … a jerk.
Nothing!

I stayed silent for a long time, too fucking long. I had known since the very first start

that I couldn't be with her, so I sucked it up. Maybe I didn't move on as I was supposed to –

because that's what normal people would do, they'd move on and live – but I sucked it up.

I had suffered for too long, watching her
every fucking day
, looking attractive as hell – so

innocent, so beautiful and so fucking sexy. Yet, I settled for beating the shit out of my dick

every fucking day
, sometimes up to five …
or maybe seven
times, and I sucked it up.

But I just couldn't take it anymore; there was only so much I could take. I mean, she

was all smiling up at me and playing with her hair, kissing me back, dreaming about me,

looking as jealous as ever whenever I touched my girlfriend. It was all there.

It was as bright as day that she felt something for me, too. I'm going to be honest here:

yes, I hated how I'd been treating her, she deserved better, but she was driving me insane.

Sending me all those mixed signals, pulling me in then pushing me away, only to pull me

back to her again, Then, not too much later, she'd push me away once more. It was so

fucking frustrating.

I didn't get it!

I wanted her, and she wanted me too, so what the fuck was her problem? Just fucking

let me in already. When I told her all about it that morning after the carnival, she still denied

it. I wasn't going to force myself on her – I would never do that – but I wanted to turn her

on, touch her until she was a limp noddle in my arms. But she didn't give me the chance.

Instead, she kicked me right in the balls!

I knew that fucking Emma in front of her wasn't a very good idea –
wel , not good at al
.

But she'd brought it on herself.

She'd hugged me that fucking wonderful hug in the bathroom the night I lost my

virginity, and it was because she was jealous. And I wasn't blind, I saw the way her face

changed every time I touched Emma in any way.

Jealousy was doing things to her. I wanted to do something
major
to make her just snap

the fuck out of it and stop with the fucking denial. But, no chance.

I didn't know what I was bringing down on myself by that; she became more furious

and hostile to me than ever. And the fucking white dress.
Oh, fuck me!

Was she using it as a punishment? If so, it fucking worked! I had jizzed my pants two

times in a row like a fifteen-year-old while grinding into her hip.

But, fuck it if it wasn't the best two nuts I'd ever busted in my whole fucking life. Worth

the whole changing my clothes again and more. The shirt though made it back to my closet;

it had touched her fucking beautiful tits, and no way in hell was I going to wash that off of it.

The shirt would stay safe
and
unwashed
in my closet forever … or maybe just until I replaced

it with another.

Her tits.
Oh, sweet Jesus!
They were what brought me to my knees in the beginning. How

many times had I fantasized about them, how soft they would feel, how good they would

taste?

My imagination did them no justice …
at al .
I wasn't planning on giving her too much,

just a little. I wanted to hear her beg. I wanted her to ask me for more, but I couldn't resist

the argument of sucking her perfect pink nipples into my mouth. And a little more touching.

"C'mon, sweetie, you're going to be late!" Mom's call to Lily brought me out of my

thoughts.

She’d gone back to her room to finish getting ready for school after she got her fucking

permission to date. She really had no idea that it would never happen,
ever
.

"I'm coming!" she called back.

Wel , most likely not, since I left you high and dry… Wel , high and wet to be more specific.
I huffed

at the thought. I really didn't like the way I had left her; I wanted her to feel good, too. I

wanted her to know that
I
could make her feel good.

Yet, I knew she wouldn't get to that point easily and let me touch her willingly. Yes, I

knew she wanted me deep inside her, or she wouldn't kiss me back and never tell me to stop

when I touched her. But she still wanted to live in the,
'oh, it's his fault, he's making me do it

without me saying I want it too, I have no hand in it'.

I couldn't work with that. I needed her to confess to it. I needed her to tell me in a

spoken word that she wanted more.

And making her frustrated like that was the only way I knew how. I could only hope it

worked.

I got a text from Ian.

—I'm at the Browns. ~I

We had a habit which started almost three years ago: on the first day of high school, our

group all rode in one car together. Ian was picking us up this time. It had been Sean for the

last couple of years, but he wasn't here now, so Ian agreed to drive since he owned a Jeep

which would fit the seven of us.

I heard Lily coming down the stairs, and assumed that Ian had sent her a text, too. I

looked up and saw her. She never failed to amaze me with how much more beautiful she

could be in just a few minutes. She was still wearing that white demon of a dress, but there

were white tights and a denim jacket as well. I felt like a douche for going all caveman on her

like I had, thinking that she was going to go out wearing just that little dress only, leaving her

legs, arms and cleavage bare for assholes to ogle and jerk off to.

I huffed again as she passed me, completely ignoring me like I wasn't there. She started

moving her hand through her hair – which she'd left swaying freely over her back and

shoulders – in front of the mirror beside the front door.

"Oh, sweetie. You look so beautiful!" Mom called from the kitchen.

"Thanks, Mom." Lily smiled at her, blushing a little.

—Just picked up Sandy. ~I

I saw Lily put her cell phone away as I did the same. Ian was telling us to wait outside

since Sandra's house was just three minutes away.

"Ian is almost here, Mom. We're going," I called.

"Okay, honey. Have a nice day at school. Say hi to the guys. I love you both!"

"Love you too." We both murmured.

As we waited outside, Lily was busy with her cell phone, texting God only knows who.

"You look beautiful," I said to her, because
hell
, she did look more than beautiful.

She looked up at me, then she smiled sweetly. It wasn't a real smile, it was a fake one, I

could easily tell, then suddenly she did something I had never seen her do before. She

flipped me off.

My eyes almost bugged out of my skull. It wasn't like Lily at all to do such a thing,

which meant only one thing: she was really mad at me.

"C'mon, dick, we're gonna be late!" Elliot's voice brought me back to reality. I found

myself standing alone and saw that Lily had already made it to the car. She hopped in the

passenger seat, leaving me to sit in the seat behind her, as Sandra and Elliot were in the back

seat.

"Where is Julia?" I asked.

"She took her car. She wouldn't come with us while Sean isn't here," Sandra replied.

"Too emotional for her." I'd never get what went through women's heads. It wasn't like he'd

fucking died or some shit.

I nodded.

"Go get your princess!" Ian sang like the girl he was a few minutes later.

I hopped out of the car when it stopped in front of Emma's house. She was just coming

out the front door as we arrived, and smiled brightly when she saw me. I knew I should kiss

her, but I was still tasting Lily on my fucking lips, and I didn't want to give up that taste just

yet. So I just kissed her on the cheek, completely ignoring the pout she showed me.

"What?" Lily's voice welcomed me as I got back in the car. She was talking to Ian, and I

could hear the smile in her voice.

He smiled back. "Nothing!" I frowned, unsure what was going on.

"Are you gonna move the fuck already or are we gonna stay here all day?" I growled at

Ian.

"Easy, dude!"

"Fucker!"

Emma was talking about something, but I wasn't really paying attention. My focus was

with the asshole who kept giving my sister side glances every now and then.

"ADRIAN!" Emma yelled, startling me.

"What?" I yelled back.

"Have you even heard what I was saying?"

"What?" I asked again, sounding like an idiot.

"I asked what you think of my new outfit!"