Marriage by Mistake (32 page)

Stopping at the window, Dean gazed outside.
With Kirk's message on the desk behind him, he could feel the real
world crowding in, the one that wanted him to face reality, the one
that said he had no significant relationship with Robby, the one
that told him he had no claim whatsoever on Kelly. He felt the
panic that always came as he brushed up against that world. It was
a world that insisted this joy could not last. Kelly wouldn't love
him forever. He had two weeks before all that came crashing in on
him. That was all.

Dean crossed his arms over his chest. He
glared out the window. Two weeks and everything was over, unless...
Slowly, he smiled. He uncrossed his arms.

Unless...he chose not to face reality even
then.

He breathed in and out. His panic eased. He
didn't have to face reality. He could go on pretending. That was
the plan he'd been considering, very privately, for some time now.
He could go on pretending. The concept was actually quite logical.
So what if feelings changed and the marriage broke
down...eventually? That was eventually, and not inevitable. Some
marriages worked. Theirs might. And if it did break down,
eventually, they'd be no worse off than if they deliberately cut
things short in two weeks.

The marriage didn't have to end in two weeks.
He could ask Kelly to stay. He
would
ask Kelly to stay.

Dean rubbed the window frame. Would Kelly
agree to this proposal? His incipient panic flared up again, but he
quickly tamped it down. Kelly was experiencing much of the same joy
that he was, Dean was certain. But unlike Dean, she didn't question
the integrity of this emotion. She believed in it. She believed in
the endurance of her feelings for Dean the same way she believed in
love and home and family. Her faith would play right into Dean's
hand.

He only had to phrase the thing right.

Dean spent another long moment gazing out the
window, then turned and went back to his desk. Picking up the
phone, he fired off a telegram to Kirk, telling him, "your presence
no longer required."

###

From Durgin Park, Felicia and Andrea walked
across the plaza to Government Center where they had a meeting with
a city planning director about the proposed expansion of the family
aid shelter.

A smile played about Andrea's lips. "You seem
awfully curious about that check of Joe Esterley's."

Felicia blinked and felt the little dart that
stabbed her every time she thought about Joe's check. "It's a
mystery, that's all. I've never known Esterley to donate a sum to
any charity."

Andrea lifted one of her dark eyebrows but
she didn't pursue the matter further, for which Felicia was
grateful. The minute she'd opened the envelope and seen that check
from Joe Esterley, that large check, her stomach had gone into a
free fall. Two thoughts had occurred simultaneously in her mind.
One was that Joe Esterley was, indeed, a notorious pinchpenny
   and the other was that he was a bosom buddy of Troy
Singleton's.

Was it possible...
Troy
had engineered
that big check?

Felicia swallowed as she opened the glass
door at the base of Government Center and held it for Andrea. If
Troy had done that... Well,
why
?

Felicia realized she was standing there,
holding the heavy glass door, while Andrea was already in the
lobby, waiting for her. She'd completely lost track of what was
going on while pondering why Troy might have engineered that
check.

Shaking her head at herself, Felicia walked
through the door, rejoining Andrea. Troy might have had nothing at
all do with Joe's check. It was definitely safest for her sanity to
assume he was uninvolved.

But as she and Andrea waited for the
elevator, Felicia worried her lip and couldn't help wondering...if
Troy
had
arranged that check. And
why
.

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Dean had finally decided to declare himself.
At least, that's what Kelly thought this special weekend away
betokened. She hoped.

They were at a gorgeous, turn-of-the-century
resort in the Berkshires. Their room was pseudo-rough-hewn, with
furniture made of unfinished logs and a thick plank floor. Plush
rugs covered the rustic floor, and velvet drapes were held back
from the multi-paned windows with thick, braided cords.

It was terribly charming and very, very
romantic.

Dean had sprung her with the invitation right
after telling her he'd arranged for Robby to spend the weekend at a
nearby outdoor camp. They could drive Robby up Friday afternoon, go
on to the resort, and then pick Robby up for the drive home on
Sunday afternoon. It was all so very well planned. So very
Dean.

"Do you like the room?" Dean had finished
with the porter and was walking toward Kelly.

"It's lovely." Kelly turned around with a
smile she felt right down to her toes. This was exactly the kind of
place Dean would choose to propose to a woman.

Dean's answering smile was crooked,
delightfully nervous. "It is rather remote, but there's sailing,
hiking, tennis    "

Kelly laughed.

Dean laughed, too. "Who am I kidding?" He
took Kelly in his arms and gave her a slow, warm kiss. "I brought
you here to get you alone, really alone."

Kelly's heart did a mad dance as she looked
up at him. "As if I'm not deeply enough in your clutches as it
is."

A strange look crossed Dean's face. "Not
quite." He let her go and turned. "Did that    ? Oh, yes,
good. He's bringing the flowers."

"Excuse me?"

The porter had returned. He pushed a cart
overflowing with vases of white roses. "Where did you want these,
sir?"

"Ah, that's up to the lady." Dean gestured
toward Kelly, whose mouth had fallen open. Flowers, dozens of them.
Her gaze shot to Dean. He was smiling, but she could see him
swallow. He wanted to please her.

Kelly raised her lowered jaw and smiled back.
"Thank you, Dean. They're beautiful."

A tiny lowering of his shoulders indicated
his relief. Kelly took his arm and gave him a kiss. Oh, the man was
going all out. And that was okay with her. It was just fine.

That evening, Dean arranged a candlelit
dinner on the patio overlooking the lake. Together, they watched
the moon glinting off the water. There were soft smiles. They held
hands. Kelly tried not to breathe too fast but adrenaline was
pouring through her. She kept expecting the big moment.

It didn't happen. No, it seemed Dean wasn't
through with the build-up. They finished dinner, enjoyed rich
coffee, then Dean led her up to their room. Candles glowed
everywhere. They gleamed off the soft skin of the roses and shed a
flickering light over the bed.

"Oh, Dean," Kelly breathed.

He came up behind her and put his hands on
her shoulders. "I'm glad you like it."

They undressed slowly that night, taking
their time, prolonging the pleasure. When Dean finally entered her
it felt fluid, as if they were two bodies of water wrapping around
and then blending into each other.

The next day they took a long walk, holding
hands and sharing warm smiles. They rented a sailboat, enjoying two
blissful hours of sun and lazy togetherness. For exercise, they
played a match of tennis. Afterward, panting and laughing, they
went up to their room.

"Wear something nice," Dean warned Kelly as
she was about to walk into the full-size shower.

Kelly mutely nodded.
Tonight
, she
thought.
He's going to do it tonight
. Her heart started
racing.

The weather was chillier than the night
before so they ate indoors. It was another candlelit table on a
balcony overlooking their outdoor patio of the night before. This
time they had a private table with a private waiter who appeared
mysteriously only when needed.

Soup was brought, a delicate, nearly
transparent bisque, followed by the crispest of green salads in
chilled glass bowls. Kelly couldn't eat a thing. Dean, she noticed,
didn't seem to have much of an appetite, either.

The waiter crystallized, somehow
understanding they were not going to finish their meals. He whisked
the plates away.

Once he was gone, Dean cleared his
throat.

Okay
, Kelly thought.
This is it.
Finally
. She made herself breathe.

"Kelly    " Dean began.

"Yes, Dean?" Breathless. She sounded
idiotically breathless.

Dean smiled. Kelly hoped to God he wasn't
finding her comical. Lord knew, she felt comical.

"Kelly," Dean said again. He reached across
the table. Kelly was clutching her wine glass. Somehow she managed
to loosen her fingers enough for Dean to take her hand.

His smile faded as he stared at their joined
hands. "Kelly, I...don't think I've told you, not in so many words,
how very, very much I've been enjoying the time we've spent
together."

"I've enjoyed it, too." Kelly's voice came
out high, squeezed around a peculiar obstruction in her throat.

Dean nodded. "And now, well...I guess..." He
lifted his eyes and gazed straight at her.

Through her nerves, Kelly did her best to
look encouraging.

Dean drew in a deep breath. "Well, I
guess..." Suddenly his gaze flicked to the side. He cleared his
throat. "I guess I'd like to plan ahead a little bit."

Kelly blinked and stared at him. He wanted to
plan ahead...
a little bit
? She blinked some more, trying to
reconcile this with the words she'd been expecting. He only wanted
to plan ahead a
little bit
?

But perhaps this was a prelude? If Dean were
as nervous as she was, he might need to build up to the real thing.
Trying to help, she breathed, "Um, okay. Let's...plan."

Dean's gaze swept to hit her then veered off
again. "As far as, well    you going back to Las Vegas,
well, perhaps you don't need to."

Kelly's heart picked up speed again. This was
more like it. "I    Right. Why do I need to?" she
whispered.

Dean's eyes came back to hers. His hand
tightened around her own. "Kelly. If you    ? Well. I'll
just lay it out for you. I want to keep things going."

Kelly stared into his eyes. She held her
breath. But he didn't go on. He just looked at her, intense and
expectant. He didn't say, 'I love you.' He didn't say, 'Will you
marry me, for real?' No, he said he wanted to 'keep things
going.'

Kelly's heart beat very fast. This certainly
wasn't a proposal. Yet as she sat there looking into his dark,
waiting eyes, she heard herself stammer, "Um, uh...yes. I'd like to
keep things going, too."

Dean's paralyzed gaze relaxed. Meanwhile
Kelly wondered if she'd said that? Had she really said that she
wanted to
keep things going
, too? How vague could anyone
get?

But Dean's expression was one of incredible
relief. "Good, then." He reached over the table to capture her
other hand as well. "It's settled."

It was settled? What was settled? But Kelly
didn't have the heart    or perhaps the guts   
to query further. Dean looked so happy, and at least something had
been said. She didn't have to leave at the end of the trial period.
The relationship would continue and, for right now, that was
enough. Their love would certainly grow. Who knew? Perhaps one day,
even soon, Dean would come out with the words she really wanted to
hear.

Oh, Kelly didn't know. Was she being
pathetic? Or patient.

Then Dean brought her fingers to his lips.
His lashes lowered as he kissed her knuckles. "You won't be sorry,"
he whispered.

Kelly looked down at his lowered head. She
knew the emotional desert he came from. She knew how far he'd
traveled to get to where they sat now. A well of love sprang up in
her heart. The gush of love was big enough and strong enough to
quell her momentary doubts. "Oh, no," she agreed. "I won't be
sorry. Ever."

###

There, he'd done it. He'd asked her to stay.
She'd said yes. Dean lay beside Kelly in the big four-poster bed of
their hotel room and listened to her soft, slow breaths. She was
asleep, which she very well ought to be after the sexual exercise
he'd given her. Oh yes, everything had gone exactly according to
plan.

So why did Dean feel as if something had been
left very undone?

He frowned at the wood beams in the ceiling.
Yes, he felt antsy, anxious, as if nothing had been settled at
all.

Well, maybe nothing had been. Kelly had said
she was going to stay, but she hadn't said for how long. Dean
hadn't asked. No, he'd stopped well short of demanding anything
substantial.

Dean's frown deepened. But, then, he hadn't
intended to demand    or expect    anything
from Kelly. That had been his whole plan. Not to expect.

But now he wondered...maybe his plans hadn't
matched his desires. Maybe he wanted to demand something from
her.

More.

A flicker of fear flashed through him,
something old, almost forgotten. He wasn't supposed to want more.
That was dangerous, unrealistic, reckless.

He didn't want anything more from Kelly, Dean
assured himself, curbing an urge to jump out of the bed and pace.
He didn't
need
more. All he needed was Kelly's commitment to
making an effort. And that was exactly what he'd gotten. A body
couldn't ask for more than that.

Dean closed his eyes. He told himself that
everything was fine. Quite all right. Deliberately, he planned the
drive home the next day. Once they'd picked up Robby they could
stop for lunch at an old farmhouse restaurant he knew. Dean
imagined Kelly's face when she saw the vegetarian sandwiches they
could put together. She loved vegetarian sandwiches.

It would be a good time.

Dean's breathing calmed. His heart rate
slowed. Everything was all right. But it was a long while before he
managed to fall asleep.