I strolled arm in arm with Tegan as we made our way to the retro British cafe a few roads from my dad’s house. Her eyes lit up as we walked into the fifties-inspired room. The walls were lined with old wooden benches, photographs of beautiful fifties pin-ups hung on the walls and the sound of rock ’n’ roll blared from an authentic-looking jukebox. A smiling waitress came over to give us menus.
‘Anything to drink to start you off, ladies? she asked brightly.
‘A cuppa!’ we said in unison, collapsing into fits of giggles.
We both ordered butties stacked with bacon and drenched in ketchup and scoffed them down. Heartache sure did make you hungry.
We left the cafe, and decided on a long walk to work off breakfast. Tegan talked about her plans for the rest of summer and I did my best to listen and grunt assurances in all the right places, but really my mind was totally preoccupied.
After a while we stumbled across a beautiful old cinema showing the latest
Ice Age
film. Tegan clapped her hands in delight –
Ice Age
was one of her favourite movies and although I wasn’t a huge fan I agreed to while away the rest of the afternoon if she promised to buy the popcorn.
I stood outside the boys’ hotel room with Riley’s keys in my hand. For some reason I was feeling nervous. Tegan and I’d spent such a good day together; it’d felt so good to be boy-free that I was almost reluctant to break the spell.
I knocked on the door and sighed, trying to sweep my rain-soaked hair into a passable style.
Logan came to the door and greeted me with a big grin. ‘Jess, how are you? It’s so nice to see you.’
‘It’s nice to see you too, Logan,’ I smiled, feeling instantly relaxed. ‘I’ve got Riley’s keys. The idiot left them at my house yesterday,’ I joked.
I stood in the middle of the hotel suite, suddenly noticing that it was pretty deserted.
‘Say, Logan, where is everyone?’ I pointed at the empty room.
‘Well, Shaq’s in his room, but the others went out after the interview,’ Logan explained.
‘Oh.’ My face fell. Even though I’d had mixed feelings
about coming over, I felt pretty let down that Riley had gone out when he was the one who’d asked me to come in the first place.
Logan’s phone began to ring and he mouthed a silent ‘sorry, have to take this’ as he picked it up and walked out of the room.
For some reason I found myself tiptoeing across to Shaq’s room. As I approached his door, I noticed that it was open a crack. I heard hushed tones from inside the room. My curiosity aroused, I leaned closer to the door, trying to hear what he was saying. I couldn’t really make out much because he was talking a mile a minute. My heart started to pump as he became silent for a few seconds, but then started again. This time I could hear him clearly.
‘But, bro, I don’t know what to do. I like her so much I can’t stop thinking about her,’ he sighed. Through the crack I watched him run his fingers through his hair, an exasperated look on his face.
Oh my God, I thought to myself. It was so obvious! Why hadn’t I seen it earlier? He likes someone else.
I stood rooted to the spot, feeling totally dejected. Why does this hurt so much? I asked myself. I heard the bedroom floorboards creak and I scuttled back into the living room. Shaq’s bedroom door opened and he walked into the room.
‘Oh, Jess … Hi …’ Shaq spluttered, clearly looking uncomfortable. ‘What are you doing here?’
‘I just came to return Riley’s keys. Logan’s in the other room on the phone,’ I said by way of explanation.
I was still standing awkwardly in the middle of the room. Shaq walked past me, towards the kitchen. His fragrance lingered in the air and filled my nostrils with the scent of cinnamon and musk.
‘I’m making a tea, would you like one?’ he asked politely.
My hair was still soaking wet and I had begun to shiver slightly. ‘Some tea would be nice, actually,’ I replied, thinking that it might help to warm me through.
The TV was on, and while Shaq made the tea I sat down and watched the sitcom showing on the screen, which happened to be one of my favourites. I silently mouthed the words in time to the characters. I loved this episode!
‘Hey, would you mind turning that up?’ Shaq yelled across the room, his back to me. ‘I love this show – this episode is the one with the monkey and the banana.’
I rolled my eyes as I did what he asked. Shaq sure wasn’t making it easy to forget about him.
He walked over with the tea and I quietly thanked him as he sat down next to me. Our eyes stayed glued to the screen, and we were laughing in unison at the jokes we both knew inside out. As I sipped my tea I began to relax, forgetting about Riley’s absence and what I’d overheard while Shaq was on the phone. I must’ve got too comfortable as the mug slipped from my hands and I spilled hot tea all over my leg.
I leaped off the couch, hopping around gripping my tea-stained jeans.
‘Oww oww owww,’ I moaned.
Shaq pulled me to the bathroom and made me sit on the side of the bath. ‘Jess, get out of those jeans. We need to get cold water on that straight away before it starts to blister.’
I scrambled out of my tea-stained jeans, relieved to get the burning-hot material away from my skin and forgetting to feel self-conscious in my pain.
Shaq pulled down the shower head and turned on the cold water. Averting his eyes, he sprayed the water over my red skin into the bath.
‘I’m such a klutz,’ I wailed, embarrassed and feeling sorry for myself.
Shaq laughed lightly. ‘Well, you certainly are accident prone.’
As the pain began to subside, I was more aware than ever of Shaq’s hand on my leg. The rest of my body began to tingle, matching the sensation of the burn.
‘Um, Shaq,’ I murmured. He looked up, and our eyes locked. His gaze was intense; his eyes soulful, mysterious pools. No words were spoken as we stared at one another. Suddenly I knew I couldn’t hold my feelings in any more. I didn’t care if he liked someone else, I didn’t care that what I was about to say would hurt Riley. I just had to
say it
, before I exploded!
The words came tumbling out of my mouth: ‘Shaq, when I’m around you I just feel happy, like all my problems totally disappear. And that’s because I feel like you know me, really know me and it feels so good to be understood. But then I question why I even feel like that because I
don’t have a clue what you’re thinking – you’re always so aloof – and … I overheard you on the phone. I … I know you like someone else, but I just have to tell you how you make me feel. I –’
Shaq cut me off.
‘Jess, I was talking about
you
.’
Suddenly the door flew open and someone stumbled into the room, belting out a song I didn’t recognize. I looked up to find Riley staggering in the doorway, clearly drunk.
‘Oh wow, guys,’ he spat, ‘soo sorry for interrupting.’
Shaq was the first to respond. ‘Riley mate, this really isn’t what it looks like. Jess just came here – like you asked – to drop off your keys and then she spilled hot tea all over herself and we were just dealing with the burn.’
Riley laughed a horrible snarling laugh that sent shivers all the way up my spine.
‘Do you think I’m stupid?’ Riley asked accusingly. ‘Look at you, Jess, standing there in your pink pants.’
‘Riley, Shaq’s telling the truth. Where have you been? Do you think that it’s OK for you to ask me to come round and then stay out drinking? Do you know how that makes me feel?’
‘It can’t be anywhere near as bad as finding you in the bathroom without your jeans on with my best friend!’
‘No, Riley, that’s not what this is – I’m not like that, how could you think I was? You really don’t know me at all. Come here,’ I said, pulling him towards me. ‘Look at the burn on my leg.’
Riley’s clouded eyes softened as he saw the extent of my burn.
I pulled my jeans on hurriedly, and made for the door, furious that Riley had jumped to the wrong conclusion like that. He really didn’t know me at all.
He scoffed and stumbled, edging towards the doorway, but I pushed past him and ran for the lift, annoyed that I felt tears brimming in my eyes – Riley didn’t deserve my tears.
Shaq ran after me and put his foot in the door of the lift.
‘Hey,’ he whispered, grabbing my face softly, forcing me to look at him. ‘You know he didn’t mean any of that. He’s just had a bit too much to drink and he’s not thinking straight. Seriously.’
Shaq stroked my face gently, wiping away the tears that cascaded down my cheeks. It was all too emotion for one night. I pushed Shaq’s foot away from the door and broke into a sob just as the door closed. The look of tenderness on Shaq’s face had just been too much to bear.
‘Jess, wake up. Get uuuup!’
Whoever it was sounded pretty irritated. But still I didn’t budge, hoping they’d just leave. I felt the sudden coldness hit my skin as the covers were pulled off, causing me to shudder. I let out a frustrated groan and kicked my feet, just like a child would. Tegan began to laugh as she tickled my feet.
‘Jess, your phone has been ringing non-stop all morning. Get your lazy arse up and please call whoever it is that’s so desperate to speak to you so I can go back to bed!’
Memories of the night before flooded over me and my groaning increased.
‘OK, OK, Tegan! Go back to sleep!’
I rolled myself out of my warm bed and walked down to the kitchen where I’d angrily banished my phone the night before. As if on cue, it began to ring in my hand. ‘Riley Townsend’ flashed up on my screen. I took a deep breath.
‘You’re lucky I’m even picking this up, Riley,’ I snapped
down the phone before he even had a chance to say hello.
In a barely audible whisper Riley began to talk: ‘I … I … I’m really sorry about last night, Jess. I don’t know why I acted like that. I was drunk and stupid, and just the thought of you and someone else … Well, I just exploded. You know I didn’t mean it.’
‘Actually, Riley, I don’t know that. You sounded pretty convincing to me.’
‘Well, I can prove that I didn’t mean it. Open the door, Jess.’
I hung up the phone in utter disbelief. Surely he couldn’t be outside? It was 8 a.m.! I walked to the front door, smoothing down my hair – just in case – and slowly opened it wide.
There he was. All curls and big blue eyes.
Callum stood by him. ‘Is Tegan in?’
‘Upstairs,’ I replied, and smiled at Callum as he bounded past.
Riley slowly lifted his head from the ground and looked at me directly. Instead of his usual cheeky-chappy self, he looked guilty and I could sense him begging me for forgiveness.
‘I acted totally out of line. I never meant to upset you like this.’
‘I …’ I couldn’t finish my sentence because I was unsure what to say. I was unsure what I felt. I wanted to be angry with him, so angry that I could close the door on him. Forever! But that just wasn’t the case. I didn’t really feel mad any more – I felt … Pity. Pity because I could see
how much this had affected him. And I appreciated it that he wasn’t taking my feelings lightly.
Riley spoke before I could even find the words. ‘I don’t know why I acted like that, Jess. I always get stupid when I’m drunk. I guess my innermost insecurities rear their ugly heads when I’ve had too much.’
I nodded my head, still not knowing how to respond.
I watched Riley as he reached out to grab my hand, but he stopped only centimetres away. ‘Can I?’ he whispered, gesturing towards my hand. I did nothing, letting him scoop it up into his. He drew me in closer, pulling me further inside, and closed the door behind us.
‘I’m really sorry,’ he whispered. His breath tickled my face and I started feeling … strange. My heart wasn’t pumping like it did when I was with Shaq, but I definitely did feel something.
I laughed nervously. ‘You already said that,’ I informed him. He tightened the grip on my hand and stroked the back of it with his thumb.
‘I know,’ he smiled, showing off his perfect teeth.
‘I wanted to ask you something,’ he whispered, looking directly into my eyes.
I searched his face for a while before simply nodding.
‘The Only Truth have been invited to a premiere and I would be honoured if –’
Just then Tegan came pounding down the stairs, accompanied by Callum. She rushed up to me and clasped her hands on my shoulders, shaking me vigorously back and forth.
‘OH MY GOD!’ she screamed in my face, and I couldn’t help but laugh. I grabbed her shoulders, stopping her from shaking me any more. ‘Callum’s asked me to go to a film premiere with him!’ she said excitedly, her eyes sparkling.
I smiled, laughing at her as she jumped up and down.
Riley turned to face me, trying to carry on from where we’d been interrupted. ‘Um … if you’d be my date.’ He blushed, embarrassed to have to continue his invitation in front of an audience. There was a silence as everyone waited with bated breath for my response.
Callum broke the silence. ‘Come on, Jess, you can’t let poor Riley be the only one of the boys without a date!’
My head snapped up and my heart almost stopped. ‘All?’ I couldn’t stop myself asking.
‘Yep, Logan’s girlfriend is coming – you’ll get to meet her – she’s really nice; Tyler has a mystery date that we’re curious to meet; Shaq is with his ex, Gaby; and I have gorgeous Tegan here.’
Riley looked at me beseechingly. ‘Will you come, then, Jess? Am I really forgiven?’
‘Well, I wouldn’t leave you the only one without a date,’ I said, a little bit too quickly.
Riley didn’t comment, but he looked at me quizzically.
‘Jess, are you listening?’ I looked up to find Tegan watching me, her head cocked to one side like a bird. Riley and Callum had left to go to an interview and Tegan and I were sitting in the kitchen, eating breakfast.
I shook my head, trying to get rid of the thoughts clouding my mind.
Shaq and Gaby. Gaby and Shaq.
I remembered reading about the two of them in the papers. They were a hot couple as Gaby was a famous model. Maybe there was a reasonable explanation as to why Shaq was going to the premiere with his ex. And what if she wasn’t his ex any more? But, then again, why would he feel the need to cover it up? Had Shaq been playing me all along?