Love Unmatched (17 page)

Zander's hand rubbed my back. I clamped onto his hand and walked with him towards the press conference room.

I was pretty sure Inna got my message. I was also sure that while everything was happening, a couple of camera phones recorded and took pictures of the scene. I had seen some flashes going off earlier.

Who cared? I had to set that supermodel-wanna-grab-my-man-away-from-me straight. If she thought that I was a meek, little woman, then she just received the proof that I was not.

I held on to Zander's hand. He hadn't said anything. He just kissed the top of my head and we walked towards the room where the press awaited him.

*****

Zander

Watching Sedona put Inna Posey in her rightful place was something I did not expect to see. Sedona was not one to cause a scene, so something must have really ticked her off to do what she did, and I supported her one hundred and ten percent.

If I could I would have set a barricade between Inna and me. She was always trying to get to me. She made it look like I was interested in her, especially in front of the press.

The press had a field day asking me questions about the incident between Inna and Sedona during my post-game interview instead of the outcome of the game. I answered with, "No comment," to most of them.

When Tony Leoni, a KBS sports reporter, asked me who I would choose between Inna and Sedona, I had to say something.

"I don't know what happened there tonight. I just know that my fiancé, Sedona, is a smart and sophisticated woman who thinks about her actions, and she must have been provoked for that incident to happen."

Once the word fiancé came out my mouth, I had no way to retrieve it back. Chaos erupted in the media room. The security personnel had to calm everyone down. Ron, my agent, pulled me aside and advised me not to say anything more. My coach and teammates knew about it, so it was not a big deal to them. I rubbed my hand against my temple.
Damn
. I should not have said anything. I asked Ron to check on Sedona and escort her to my car. We might not be able to get out later without running into the press because of my statement. I wanted to make sure that she was taken care of.

I continued with the interview. I could not leave because it was mandatory for me to answer questions after the game. The press tried to get me to answer more about my relationship with Sedona, but I refused to entertain those questions. I responded to the questions related to the game and the playoffs.

Later that night, while Sedona was resting her feet on top of mine in bed, I asked her about what happened. I was applying cocoa butter lotion over her legs and her bare stomach. She loved it when I did this since it soothed her.

She said calmly, "She had to get it through her model head that I wasn't standing back anymore. I'm really tired of what she's doing. When I heard her say that you're ‘her hottie quarterback', I guess that was the last straw."

I nodded and slowly massaged her arms, and she let out a huge sigh. I've noticed that she has been extremely tired these days, and sometimes, when I talked to her, she seemed like she was sad.

"Are you happy, babe?" I asked. Our situation was not ideal. The traveling back-and-forth from Minnesota and New York, the time difference between us, and the stilted conversations about how our days went because we were both too tired to talk were taking a toll on us. I've never heard her complain about how things were. Her internship would be ending soon and we'd finally be together.

She shifted her eyes away and said, "Sometimes I wonder how my life would be different without you in it..."

I stopped what I was doing and sat up. This was the first time I was hearing this.

"What do you mean?"

"Zander, I had everything perfectly planned before you came into my life. And sometimes I wonder how my life would be so different." She paused. "I'm just being silly, forget it."

"Sedona," I responded with a gentle command. "Tell me what you're thinking." Was she still happy with me? With us? Lately she was off-kilter. Was she regretting things about our relationship?

"Zander, I love you. Don't ever think that I don't. I'm happy when I'm with you and I miss you so much when we're apart. You're the best guy I could ever hope for..."

"But?" I asked when I sensed a hidden one at the end of her statement.

"I just get tired, you know? The constant snooping of the paparazzi, the presence of the media in our lives and the pressures put on us. They're starting to get to me. I just want to live my life, our lives, in peace. Sometimes, I think...this is not what I signed up for." Two small tears escaped her eyes.

How had she arrived at this point? Maybe I wasn't listening to her closely and I didn't notice the growing frustration that she must have been feeling for a while now. It was slowly crushing my heart, but I had to ask, "Do you still want to be with me?"

She wiped her tears and stared at me with clear eyes. "Babe, I love you so much. Of course I want to be with you. All I'm saying is that there's too much going on. I'm under a lot of stress right now and I'm about to pop from all of it."

I gravelly responded, "I would give it all up, you know.”

Her eyes urged me to go on.

"Sedona, I would give up all of this - football, money, everything," I continued. I had never been surer of anything. "If you asked me right now, to give everything up for you, I would."

Her eyes were now filling up with a deeper hue, she asked, "Really Zander? If I asked you to give all of this up to live in a tent with me, on a yet-to-be named island, thousands of miles away from civilization, would you?”

"Yes."

"Oh babe, I would never press rewind on my life to the point where I'd never met you. It's true, this is isn't what I've signed up for. I didn't see myself as being a football player's wife or being pregnant at this age." She peered at me lovingly and stroked my chin with her hand. "I get tired of all this crap around us, but if there's one thing that I'm sure of, with one hundred percent certainty, it’s that I love you and I'll always want to be with you."

She leaned into me and gave me a long, slow kiss. I took my shirt off and tossed it aside so I could feel her skin close to mine.

Sedona's love for me was dauntless. It was what made her fight for me through all the crap that was thrown at us by the media and the gossip mongers. It was what made her travel the hundreds of miles between us, even when she was as tired as a limp horse, to watch my games because they were important to me. It was what made her try all the things that she has never done before. All because she loved me. She once told me that I was her first; her first lover, her first heartache, and her first love. It was an honor for me to be her first in a lot of things. And I was going to make damned sure that I was also going to be her last.

She looked so beat that she didn't even realize that she was leaning awkwardly against me while she softly snored. I slowly lowered her head on top of the two big pillows that she usually slept on.

As I reached for the lamp by the bedside table to turn it off, I heard her murmur quietly but clearly, "Would you still give everything up for me, if the island that we were stuck on had no chicken wings?"

That made me smile. I placed my head on my pillow beside her and said, "Now that might be a problem for me.”

“Nothing on this earth could compare to the beauty that I see in you.”

Sedona

“Okay, this one looks really good on you.” Haven, Zander’s mom, was assessing how the gown fitted on me. “I just don’t know if it will have enough ‘give’ a few weeks from now.”

We were presently trying out wedding gowns at the bridal showroom of her Italian designer friend. I couldn’t help but admire the view of the Manhattan skyline from the 38
th
floor of the New York Cosmopolitan Hotel.

“I like the look of this dress,” I said. “I just don’t feel like this is the
one
.” The bodice of the dress was a spaghetti-strap, halter-style that flowed into a full-pleated tulle skirt. The feel of the tulle was glorious. The overall effect was alluring. There was just something missing in it. I could not pinpoint it, but this was not
my dress
.

Haven’s light blue-green eyes reflected approval. “This would look really good on another woman. It’s just not you.”

I gave her a smile. We’ve been trying wedding gowns for over two hours now. I was getting exhausted. I met her designer friend two weeks ago at a fashion show, and she was now in Milan doing another show.

A bridal assistant came in every few minutes to check in on our progress. Haven had gently asked the assistant to bring us some snacks earlier since she must’ve heard my stomach growl.

The assistant brought us mini-cupcakes and bottled water. The mini-cupcakes were considered gone the moment I saw them. Haven must have eaten only one out of the seven that were in the silver tray. They were so tiny. Bakers should not tempt people with mini-cupcakes. I needed the super-sized versions of them.

Zander’s mom was determined to end the hunt for my wedding gown today. We had been communicating over the phone and through emails over the past few months. She sent me bridal magazines and look books. There were several dresses that I really liked, but when I tried the gowns in person they did not look or feel right.

I heard my phone ring from my purse. Haven heard it too, as she handed me my purse since I was entrapped in the dress.

It was Zander. He was supposed to be resting up right now. I excused myself to answer his call.

“Hey babe,” he greeted. “How’s it going with Mom?”

“It’s going great,” I said, slightly crestfallen. “I just don’t know if I’ll ever find a dress. I like a lot of stuff, but they don’t feel right. Plus, we have to make sure that the alterations will look right since you’re marrying me when I’m about ready to deliver.”

He remarked encouragingly, “Babe, you’ll look beautiful in anything. Just tell the designer to patch something up for you.”

“Shhh. Patch something up? This designer would kick me to the curb if I suggested that.” Guys- they were clueless about dresses.

“Seriously, babe,” he mumbled, “you could wear a burlap sack and you’ll look magnificent. Here’s a thought… why don’t you just be naked on our wedding day? That way, you won’t have to go through the trouble of looking for a dress.”

I burst out into laugher. I truly loved this man. He made me laugh like no other.

“I love you,” I said, still laughing. If Zander had his way we’d be married in a nudist colony. Of course, he’d probably have the minister and the wedding guests blindfolded so that he’d be only one seeing me naked.

“I love you, too.” His voice sounded so sexy.

Haven motioned to me that she wanted to talk to Zander. “I’m going to give the phone to your mom, she wants to talk to you,” I said.

“Okay,” he answered.

Haven talked with Zander for a few minutes. I slowly moved towards a chair and slumped in it.

My feet were starting to ache. What I would give for more of those mini-cupcakes.

“I think we’re done for the day.” Haven must have seen my act of surrender, and my body was now officially clamoring for a space in my bed. She added, “Let’s have lunch.”

During lunch, we talked about everything, from my internship, to Zander, to our baby plans. I loved spending time with her. I’ve gotten to know her closely in the past few months. She loved to shop for bargain prices. She was fascinated with buying things on markdowns. She was the one who introduced me into buying extraordinary lamps and lampshades. We were planning to hold a lamp-themed auction to benefit terminally ill children. I wanted to let Zander know about the auction once his mom and I had everything put together. Her unassuming stance, her kindness, and grace endeared her to me.