The rest of the week does not go quickly enough for me. After James left me, I did manage to bake some more cakes, but made several mistakes during the day; giving people the wrong drinks and generally spending far too much time in a love-hazed dream.
“Lizzie, what is the matter with you today? That’s the third time you’ve messed up an order, and I found a plate in the bin rather than dishwasher,” asks Kate, perplexed because I rarely get orders mixed up and don’t usually put plates in the bin.
“Sorry Kate, we’ve been so busy, I’ve not had chance to speak to you, but James came in this morning and we kissed – properly – I haven’t been able to concentrate since,” I reply still smiling.
“Oh Lizzie, that’s great! Right–as soon as we’re finished serving today, we’re having cake and coffee on the sofa and you can tell me all about it. I’ll nip next door to get Ruth because she’ll want to hear this too – hopefully she’ll be home from work.”
“Ok, but don’t we have cake after we finish every day?” I ask.
“Well yes, but today we really do have a good excuse to have it,” Kate replies whilst taking out the correct order this time, and I go back to try concentrating on the accuracy of the next one.
After a long day, Kate, Ruth and I sit down to chocolate muffins whilst I tell them about my kiss with James. “I can’t believe how he makes me feel – I’ve never felt like this before. I am not sure if it’s lust or love, but I’m loving the feeling whatever it is,” I gush.
“Try not to think too much, Lizzie – you know how you do that sometimes – just relax and enjoy it,” replies Ruth with an air of wisdom – as if she knows what will happen in life. We chat some more with Kate becoming almost as animated over the kiss as I am.
By Friday morning, I am beside myself with excitement at seeing James again – I feel like a teenager. Kate has agreed to cover the morning in The Tea Cosy, so I only have to be in at 11 o’ clock. James’ mid week guests leave about 10.00am, so that leaves us with one full hour alone together. Although I am filled with enthusiasm, I am also a little nervous – you know that excited kind of nervous feeling you get before a first date- a bit like having hyper butterflies in your tummy?
Ensuring that I am wearing my sexy, new underwear (just in case), I climb into my car and head off to the centre – in the wrong direction. After turning the car around and in the process of doing this, I knock over one of Ruth’s precious flower pots. I will apologise and rectify that later, with some of my Eton mess, which Ruth loves. I think this fits her personality perfectly as she is a mixture of cluttered surprises. It also reminds me of the mess I’ve just made of the doorstep (get it?) so seems apt. Heading off, now in the right direction, even my car seems happy and bounces up the lane with a spring in its step.
I drive over the little humpback bridge that crosses the stream in the centre grounds. And there he is with his wild, dark curls, tall frame and huge smiling eyes – waiting for me. I can’t help but stare in wonder at my boyfriend. Is he my boyfriend? I’m not sure yet, but I do know he wants me and that’s enough to send my heart racing right now.
Opening the creaky door of my car and practically lifting me out, he pulls me into a very welcome embrace and another mind blowing kiss, which is unfortunately interrupted by the clearing of a throat somewhere.
“Sorry to interrupt you James. Hi, Lizzie. I’m off now. Do you want me to lock up before I go?” asks Pete. I remember Ruth said she and Pete are also making the most of the break between guests departing before new ones arrive.
“No I’m not going home, so just leave everything open. Cheers Pete, I’ll see you later on,” replies James. We wait until Pete has at least started to descend down the drive, before returning to our heavenly kiss. Inhaling deeply, I breathe in his smell. It’s one of those clean, fresh smells, perhaps containing the faint hint of shower gel and outdoor fresh air–no overpowering or sickly aftershave. I completely lose myself in the kiss and physical contact with the closeness of James’ body pushing against me – never having experienced such wanton feelings with anybody before. James reluctantly breaks the kiss and we both pant slightly from the obvious arousal provoked in each other. I certainly know he is aroused from the hard form of his p...- sorry I just can’t say the P word – what shall I call it? This is something else I need to get over and grow up about – using the correct terminology for people’s private parts. If anybody says the V word, I just giggle. I mean who on earth came up with scrotum for goodness sake? I mean, is that a case of selecting an awful sounding word for an awful looking part of a man’s anatomy? Sorry, I’m getting somewhat sidetracked again.
“Lizzie, we need to talk, let’s go over to the picnic benches by the stream. I can’t talk to you when you’re so close to me – I need some distance.”
“Oh okay,” I reply following him, although I’m quite happy not talking and just kissing to be totally honest. As we sit down James hesitates and then sits opposite me, but holds my hands across the bench. It feels like I’m in somebody else’s dream. I am sitting next to this gorgeously, fit man, holding hands in the most peaceful and picturesque settings, yet unfortunately he has decided to be a gentleman with me, when all I want is for him to throw me down on the soft grass and then ...
“Lizzie, are you listening?” he asks me as I realise that I have in fact not listened to a word he’s just said.
“Oh sorry, I was just thinking,” I reply, still admiring his manly hands enveloping mine. I love a man with practical hands, not like those who have manicured nails and look as though they need to do a bit of hard labour. He is gently stroking the backs of my hands with his thumbs and seems slightly apprehensive.
“I wanted to check that you understand about Natalie and also to officially ask you out on a date. You still haven’t actually said how you feel, Lizzie.” Again I see the slightly vulnerable side of James as he says this and also the fact that he is probably trying not to mess this up and endure the wrath of Mark. I still can’t believe he’s asking me how I feel – can he not tell from the way I shiver in response to his touch?
“James I’d love to go out with you, but it’s my dinner party tomorrow night. If you can come, that would be our first official date?” I feel this is a suitable answer, but really in my head I’m saying, “I’m falling in love with you after just two kisses – sod the dinner party, just take me NOW – here – I don’t care who’s watching!” but I feel it’s a little too early to say this out loud. We both sit there grinning like idiots for a few minutes, basking in the happy glow that we both actually want to be together in many ways and each waiting for the other to make the next step .
“Well yes I suppose it will be. I’d really like to have you all to myself on our official first date, but I’ll have to wait a little longer for that. How about we get together Sunday night as I won’t have to get up early the next day and Monday is your day off – I could cook for you or we could go out for a meal, which ever you prefer.”
“I’d love to come to your place; it’s more relaxing,” I smile, imagining myself sitting on his sofa in front of his wood burning stove – oh hang on it’s still July; maybe not the stove then, with his arm around me, kissing me softly at first and then gradually building up pressure... I drift off again as my day dream progresses indecently in my head.
“Lizzie – are you listening? You’ve gone all flushed – are you okay?”
“Oh sorry – yes I’m fine, what were you saying?”
With the important stuff out of the way, James talks about his plans for the centre next week and I share my plans for the Tea Cosy’s latest themed night, Stitch and Scoff – you guessed it, people come and learn to sew and scoff my cakes. There is a definite crackle of chemistry–causing tension, but at the same time, talking to James feels so natural – without any awkward silences. You know what I mean, don’t you? When you are talking to somebody and the pauses seem to last a lifetime, so you need to fill them with nervous chatter about mind-numbingly boring conversation – well most of my previous dates have been like that. If you have no idea what I’m talking about, consider yourself lucky!
“There’s something I’m curious about Lizzie. How did you become such a fantastic map reader?” James asks.
“Ah that. Well it’s down to my dad really – I seem to have inherited his map reading genes. I suppose I could have inherited something useful like his ability to solve difficult mathematical problems, but no such luck, I got the map reading skills.”
“Of course, I do remember him being a genius at finding his way around our university campus – so much so, I thought he’d been to that university when he was younger. Map reading skills are not to be knocked Lizzie – for a man who runs an outdoor activity centre, they’re a real turn on!” he replies with a grin, giving me a brief, but soft kiss on my fingers. James glances at his watch. “Where’s the time gone–we’ve only ten minutes before you have to go back to The Tea Cosy. Lizzie, I don’t want to rush you into anything or mess this up, but the fact is, that you drive me so crazy, I struggle to keep my hands off you,” he says gesturing towards the bench separating us, “but there’s only one thing to do in the next ten minutes.”
“What’s that?” I ask slightly unsure what he means as he picks me up and carries me over his shoulder to the bank of the stream beneath the stone bridge that crosses it. I am hoping my bum looks elegant hanging over his strong shoulder.
As James lowers me gently down, he allows my body to slide slowly down his until my feet finally touch the floor. My face is left upturned and my mouth is open slightly with a question on my lips that he answers with, “I can kiss you properly here without any interruptions.” His arms holding me tightly against him, I brace myself for heaven, leaning for strength against the mossy, bridge wall behind me. His kiss deepens and I could seriously kiss him all day – he’s like an addictive drug that I just can’t get enough of. His hands move slowly from rubbing the back of my neck, to sliding across my shoulder blades, then round to either side of my breasts, where he starts to gently circle my nipples with his thumbs. I am in ecstasy – he could strip me and love me right here and right now for all I care. I feel him hard against me and press my pelvis firmly against him, causing him to groan with pleasure. Suddenly we hear loud rumbling sound from above, like angry thunder. We draw apart slightly both looking up, still dazed and overcome with lust. I am confused over the noise and uncertain if James is hungry or if it’s some sort of sexual growl.
“I don’t believe it. The minibus for my next lot of guests has just gone over the bridge and they’re early,” James moans as he glances at his watch. “Lizzie I can’t take much more of this kissing then stopping – I’m warning you! I don’t want to rush you into anything, but believe me, I struggle to control myself with you. If you need more time, then I need to stop kissing you. May be we should eat out on Sunday, in public with a table between us,” he suggests.
“Stop worrying James – I’m a big girl now. I won’t tell Mark that you just want to jump me,” I tease him thinking that this can’t go fast enough. He’s driving me crazy too. I’m not sure how much more of this starting and stopping I can take either.
Slightly disappointed that our hour together has rushed by so quickly, we head back to the centre and I long for Saturday, so I can see him again, but long, even more so, for Sunday night!
Note to self
Item number five on my list is half way to being completed, in that I have prepared the majority of the food for tonight during quieter moments at The Tea Cosy today. Kate kindly closed up by herself, so that I could head up here to the flat to get things ready.
My menu is as follows:-
Starter
Goats’ cheese and caramelised onion tartlets
(Kate’s favourite)
Main
Steak and ale pie
(Not very posh, but James mentioned he loves it, so I made last minute menu changes. It will, of course, be served in individual posh mini pie dishes.)
Dessert
Individual heart-shaped strawberry cheesecakes
(Well – I’m in love and like hearts)
Lying back in the bath before my guests arrive, I feel truly decadent, surrounded by a fizzing bath bomb that’s spilling petals around my smooth, hair free, oiled body. Everything is ready for tonight – this task is one in which I will excel–I know where my talents lie. There will be no facing fears with this task, just doing something I’ve always wanted to. The only things I am slightly apprehensive about are the table decorations of heart serviettes and heart table confetti. They were left over from the Valentine’s day decorations at The Tea Cosy. What can I say – they looked nice when I was dressing the table and James was in my thoughts. Never fear – I can refer to Kate and Ben’s engagement if anybody questions there being too many of hearts – see I have it all covered.
After my bath, I hang my underwear sets on the picture rail in the living room, so that I can take my time on deciding which set I’ll wear tonight and also tomorrow night. With salacious feelings, I glide around the room selecting my choice of a pretty dark blue set that Tabitha bought for me, followed by my favourite mid night blue dress. It’s the type of dress which swishes delicately as you move, but falls at a lovely length just above the knee – classy, feminine, yet sexy is my aim.
Having paid extra attention to my hair and makeup, I glance in the mirror to see if I have the effect I am hoping for. Believe it or not, I look pretty good, even if I do say so myself – wearing decent underwear does make me feel more confident. Living in jeans and a t-shirt most days, means it is quite a surprise to see how good I can look with a little more effort.
A knock on the door distracts me, so I dash downstairs in excitement to find James at the door dressed in a suit, with his shirt open at the top, causing my tummy to flip in appreciation. “Lizzie you look beautiful, come here and let me kiss you before Pete gets here with Ruth; we came together, but he’s just calling for her now,” he growls as he takes me in his arms.
“You scrub up quite well yourself Mr Colley.” With this, he kisses me, giving my rear a little squeeze, before we break apart knowing that the arrival of my other guests is imminent, including my brother’s. I haven’t thought about Mark’s reaction to our relationship yet. Will he feel uncomfortable by our relationship? Only time will tell.
The following half an hour has left my flat busy with activity as Ruth, Pete, Kate, Ben, Tabitha and Mark arrive. Tabitha and Mark are staying in my spare room tonight, which I am also thrilled about, not having had them to stay before and also with our new found friendship blossoming. Drinks are poured, the starter is warming in the oven filling the air with wonderful smells, whilst we all move to the living room to chat until the food is ready.
Strangely, Ruth keeps staring at me with extremely wide eyes, which I assume are in recognition of the fact that James and I, are obviously an item. He is sitting next to me with his hand resting on my knee. This touch alone is sending me into space with lubricious thoughts. Kate is also giving me a very wide-eyed stare and keeps dramatically raising her eyes upwards. What is up with them both? Tabitha starts giggling uncontrollably – what is going on?
“Lizzie, perhaps you should have put your clothes away before we arrived,” says Mark as he starts laughing too, then, with horror, I realise I haven’t put the remaining sets of underwear away, which are now hanging from the picture rail on full display. One is a silky, thong set and the other red and lacy. Jumping up, I dart across the room like a rabbit to its burrow, grab the underwear and screw it into a ball. I feel my face start to flush with embarrassment that my brother has seen the underwear I am likely to wear for his friend. I look over for his reaction and his face is an angry turbulent sea of emotion. For a moment, my heart sinks as I think Mark is unhappy, until he breaks into a laugh. “It’s okay Lizzie, James called me to tell me about his intentions towards you – well not all of them, thank goodness, looking at that underwear. I am very happy for you both.” I catch James’ eyes for the briefest moment and they speak volumes about his true intentions. I suddenly feel quite smug and join in the laugher, after quickly chucking the underwear on my bed before escaping to check on the tartlets.
“Come on through – dinner is ready everybody!” I shout before arranging the tartlets on plates to take through to the dining room.
“Here let me give you a hand with those – they look delicious by the way,” says James as he lifts the plates to take through to the dining room. I can’t help but do a little happy, leap because
MY BOYFRIEND
is helping me at my dinner party!
As the evening progresses both wine and conversation flow continuously; I take a moment to watch my friends and family having fun together. It is like one of those out of body experiences as if I am watching in from the outside and it looks like the type of evening in which I would want to dive into and join. Right now, I am in a bubble of happiness and it feels good.
“James, Ben and I have a proposition for you,” Kate says to my surprise as she hasn’t mentioned anything to me, but I’m guessing it’s about her wedding ideas after spending the weekend at The Northern Edge.
“Sounds interesting–what is it?” James asks.
“Well we were hoping we could have our wedding reception at your centre and book it out for the whole weekend. We thought that with it being in such a fantastic setting for photos and also that people could stay over and do some activities the next day if they wish, it would be perfect,” gushes Kate with enthusiasm. I can’t help agree that it is the perfect venue for her and Ben’s wedding. All eyes turn to James awaiting his response.
“I think it’s a great idea – you could start a trend. Why don’t you both come up after work one day this week and we can discuss ideas.”
“That would be great. I think it would be the ideal place for us, not to mention fun for our guests. I was hoping my mates and I could come the night before and do some activities,” says Ben.
“As long as you don’t turn up to our wedding with a broken leg!” warns Kate, eyebrows raised determinedly.
Mark also chimes in words of encouragement, “I’d love to visit the centre again, maybe even book the centre for a work conference this year and I still haven’t seen your cottage yet James. It seems strange that you ended up with the one we walked past so many times in our university holidays,”
“You should come down and stay Mark, you too Tabitha. I haven’t had many guests yet, but to be honest, I’ve spent nearly all my time at the centre. Things will slow down a little in the winter months, so I intend on doing a lot of work to it then. Come before I start or you may be staying in a building site,” replies James.
Later that evening, as I’m loading the dish washer and pouring more drinks, I feel now familiar hands slide around my waist, so I turn round to be greeted with a kiss. “Well Lizzie, you can successfully tick that off your list. I can only describe the food as fabulous and the company even more so, and that steak and ale pie – marry me woman!” I laugh and snuggle into James’s body thinking yes I would marry you, if only you were serious.
“I’m really pleased with how it’s all gone. I can’t believe this is the first time I’ve had everybody over for dinner. Why haven’t I done it loads of times? I’m half way through my list now and it’s only July. I still have ten months to do the other half.”
“Are you going to let me know what the other five things are your list Lizzie?” asks James whilst nibbling my ear so softly and gentle that it’s sending shivers down my spine and I’m wishing Mark and Tabitha weren’t staying over now.
“Well not everything on my list, it’s my secret for now, but I’ll tell you two more things. I would love to see whales swimming in the wild. I think they’re amazing and have always wanted to see them swim – to know how they look in the ocean. The other is to sing by myself, very loudly, in a crowded place, like a shopping mall or something,” as I say this James chokes on his wine slightly. “What? What’s up?” I ask.
“I’ve heard you sing Lizzie and as much as you are a fabulous cook, beautiful, fun, ditsy (sometimes)–your singing is terrible. What would ever possess you to force that sort of punishment on innocent members of the public?” James asks with a mischievous look in his dark eyes.
“Hey!” I say rather shocked at his bluntness, but giggle because he is in fact being truthful and that’s the reason for my choice of this task. “Well it’s like the whole naked in the woods reason – about not worrying over consequences so much. What I mean is–that if I sang my heart out knowing I sound terrible and not caring what people think, it will free me of worries in a way. Rather than being cautious about what people think, I just want to sing and not care. People might think that I’m slightly strange or just a terrible busker, but is that really so bad? It’s not, but it’s taken me to get to the age of 29 to realise this. I just want to push myself to do things I wouldn’t normally dream of and so far doing this list has been one of the most life-changing things I’ve done.”
“I admire you for doing it, but seriously, please let me be there to watch you sing – after the busy time I’ve had with the centre, I could do with a good laugh.” I swipe at James with the tea towel as he dodges out of the kitchen with some more wine. “I love whales, too – definitely more than your singing,” he replies as he disappears from view. Well, James Colley – you’re being cheeky tonight. I’ll remember that.
Shortly after mid-night, James and Pete make plans to leave as they have to get the centre ready for more guests in the morning, although James has arranged other staff to be in knowing that he and Pete may not be on top form. Pete leaves to walk Ruth to her home next door, leaving James and me at the bottom of my stairs.
“I wish I didn’t have to go Lizzie, but if I stayed, I couldn’t keep my hands off you and with Mark in the next room – it would feel weird,” he says, kissing my nose gently in between his words.
“I know what you mean, it would feel strange, and tomorrow we’ll have more privacy, so you don’t have to keep your hands off me,” I reply suggestively. James pins me against the door kissing me with a fierce passion and again, so that I would happily make love to him on the doorstep.
“Ahem, ahem,” Pete coughs from a respectable distance.
“See you tomorrow, Lizzie,” he kisses my nose again, turning to walk the two miles home with Pete.
“See you tomorrow Heathcliff,” I answer.
“What do you mean, Heathcliff?”
“You often have this angry Heathcliff look about you, which I had initially mistaken for disapproval, but now know it’s when you’re turned on. I can read you like a book now, you know.”
“Are you reading another book then – another classic – Wuthering heights?”
“No, just saw the film.”
“It’s time I’m off,” he kisses me briefly as I watch until he’s nearly out of sight and sigh deeply with contentment, but also unfulfilled longing.
“Are you in love Miss Parker?” Kate giggles coming down the stairs towards me. “Ben’s just chatting with Mark about stag do dates, he’ll be down in a minute, so we’ll be off soon.”
“I might well be – I’ve never felt like this before, Kate, as though I can’t get enough of him. It’s early days and we’ve not ‘you know what’ yet. Do you think it’s silly to feel this way so soon?” I ask.
“Not at all Lizzie. Some people have the slow burn type of relationships, some start as friends, and with others it’s love at first sight. You’ve know James a little through Mark, but not as an adult and it seems you both can’t leave each other alone. I really like James; he seems like such a lovely bloke. The way he dealt with Natalie respectfully shows he is a decent man – enjoy it and don’t think too much! Here’s my own bundle of love now,” Kate says as Ben appears beside her and rolls his eyes.
“Don’t you mean hunk of love – really Kate, what will Lizzie think if you describe me as a bundle?” grumbles Ben as he hugs me goodbye. “Thanks for the fabulous meal, Lizzie – I had a great time – makes a change from vet talk all the time. By the way, did you know you’ve got some sort of dead plants in your bath’s plug hole?”
“Oh no, my bath bomb, I forgot to clean the plug.”
“Well if I’m honest Lizzie, at first I thought it was cat sick, but then I remembered you don’t have a cat and I have consumed far too much beer to tell what it was at first glance. However, I did make a closer inspection and I realised it was definitely some sort of plant.”
“You mean you actually went closer to something you thought was cat sick? Then again, I suppose you’re a vet and more than used to inspecting unsightly things,” Kate laughs. I watch them both as they slowly wander off down the ribbon-like lane, arm in arm, still laughing and completely unaware that I am smiling at them, wondering if James and I will ever get to their stage. Then reality bites, and I think we probably won’t if he looked at my plug hole and came to the same conclusion as Ben initially did!
Back up in the flat, Tabitha and Mark have made coffees and cleared up a whole load of meal debris. “Thanks so much for clearing the table and for coming tonight – I’m so glad you did.” All fuelled by wine, we are all slightly more loose tongued.