Lincoln County Series 1-3 (15 page)

Andrew broke the growing silence. “Before we eat, would anyone oppose a brief prayer of thanks for our food?”

Surreptitiously, Cameron scanned Andrew’s home and possessions while he prayed. It was small but quaint. Masculine touches were everywhere but so was the elegance. Every item spoke volumes about the man, who was fine, gentle and strong. Unexpectedly, she pictured herself cooking in his kitchen, perfect for two. With great guilt, she realized where her thoughts were taking her. She felt her ears grow hot and self consciously stooped a little in shame.

The small group was crowded in his home but no one seemed to care as they passed around plates of food and mugs of hot cider.

She had been watching Jake and Andrew relate with each other during the evening. The last thing she ever wanted to do was come between childhood friends. Little did she know the internal struggles both men had to deal with whenever she was near. Distinctively different as those struggles were, it came down to the same thing—they both wanted her.

Chapter Twenty-Five

When everyone returned to the hotel they entered the foyer as quietly as possible, not wanting to wake any guests. Jake and Andrew both decided to stay rather than ride home so late in the heavily falling snow. The evening made Cameron’s year. She was beyond grateful to have found a place within this new family of hers and regretted the need to say good night. She didn’t want it to end.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, Charlotte appeared in front of them, instantly locking Cameron’s neck with her forearm, a shiny knife gripped in her other hand.

Every face in the company turned dark—worry mixed with anger and fury.

“Don’t even think about it!” Charlotte snarled at Liam. She whipped Cameron’s body around. “Get out here where I can see you. Don’t you dare reach under that counter or I’ll cut her throat.”

Thomas and Jesse were playing cards and ordered to stand as well.

Sheriff Randall was first to intervene. “Let’s talk about this, what’s the trouble?”

“Ask him.” She jerked her head towards Thomas.

“Do you really think you can take us all?” Jake asked. “You think you’re gonna get away with this?”

“I could care less if I get away with this. At least I’ll be finishing what I came to do. I’m doing it for you, too, Thomas, as ungrateful as you are, you pig.”

Cameron gasped.
What?

Thomas took several quick steps. “Shut up, Charlotte. I am not in on this. Tell them,” he ordered.

“I’ll tell them all right.”

Cameron saw Thomas stiffen.

Charlotte staggered, then gathered her balance. Loudly she taunted, “You see, little girl, we tried to get rid of you but you just wouldn’t go. I thought you cared for Jake more than you did—obviously you just wanted a roll in the hay, same as me.”

Cameron let out a humiliated cry and brought her eyes to Andrew. She wished she hadn’t, he looked so stricken.

“That’s it, let all of these people who lift you up as ‘Miss Innocent’ know what kind of a person you really are. Why, you should be working over here on this side of the hotel.” She laughed wickedly.

Salty tears streamed down Cameron’s face and into the crease of Charlotte’s fleshy arm.

“Shut up!” Jake said, disdain filling every syllable.

“No, you shut up. You should be mad at Thomas, not me. He’s the one who hit you over the head that night that you and I...well ah, you know.”

Jake swung towards Thomas. Both men had hands on their guns before settling eyes on each other.

“This is between me and her, Jake. That’s all I am going to say.”

Revelation hit Cameron—that’s why he did it, to get her to leave. To make her go crying back to Ludenville from a broken heart due to Jake. Didn’t Thomas know what he’d done was much worse?

Jake said, “I don’t take kindly to being used. You ought to know that.”

Lacey looked wildly at them. “That’s all you have to say? Somebody do something!” she cried out desperately.

Charlotte pressed the knife into Cameron’s cheek. “Anybody comes any closer, I’ll draw blood from her pretty face.” She teased the tip of the blade perversely, round and round, creating small circles.

Cameron felt herself grow weak. It had more to do with her brother’s actions than the knife ready to carve her. She sought him out. He had to look away from her. It killed her to know what he’d stooped to. Her own flesh and blood.

Jake swore and yelled, offering himself if she would let Cameron go.

“It’s too late for that. You flatter yourself.” Charlotte grumbled.

He looked defeated and remorseful for putting Cameron in this situation.

Cameron took to pleading, hoping to distract Charlotte. “I’ve never done anything to you. There is nothing to be jealous of.”

“Jealous? Ha! You couldn’t be more wrong—jealous of you? You think too much of yourself. I’m way more of a woman than you are or ever will be.”

Once more, she steadied the knife until blood dripped from the pressure of it. Cameron noticed Jake and Thomas exchange a glance and knew that time was running out.

Jake began spewing all sorts of invectives at Charlotte until Thomas rushed her. Cameron saw him coming from her blurred vision and so must’ve Charlotte, because she held firm the knife and sliced a fine line across her lower cheek. Thomas roared like a madman and was suddenly choking Charlotte with all his might. Jesse pulled him off.

Once on his haunches, Thomas fixed his stare upon Cameron, as if to say that this was what he was; this was exactly the part of him he didn’t want her to know.

Lacey wrapped her arm around Cameron and lead her away from the scene. Cameron held a piece of linen to her face, lifting it once in a while to check the bleeding. Ed had Charlotte in his arms, carrying out her limp body.

*** *** ***

The beautiful evening had turned into a nightmare. Cameron shook Lacey off and approached Thomas. She’d been stripped of all pride, and without a thread of it left to hang onto, she threw herself at her brother’s feet, sobbing. She sobbed even harder when she felt the surprised warmth of his arms raising her up and encircling her. The whole room could testify to the presence of longing and regret radiating from them. He whispered apologies, apologies for failing her, for being cruel and cold-hearted, and for abandoning her and their mama.

Cameron looked into his eyes, her tears never ceasing their flow. “You never abandoned us.”

Everyone remaining in the saloon had been forced to eavesdrop, so each began to sneak out one at a time.

“Of course I did.” His reply was harsh.

“Mama made you leave, same as she made me leave. She wanted better for us. And I think she succeeded.” She still held the cloth to her cheek, but the bleeding had stopped.

“Look at you. How can you think that? And me, I’ve been killing men my whole adult life—look what I did to you and Jake? Cameron…that’s the kind of person I am.”

“That’s the first time you ever said my name,” she said softly.

He looked at her, stunned. “It is?”

“I’ve been waiting for you to acknowledge me and say my name. Thank you, Thomas. And because you try so hard to keep me away from you simply means that you care! It doesn’t have to matter how you’ve lived. My father would have killed you if you had stayed. Mama knew that. He was a drunkard,” she stated matter-of-factly.

“That’s just it,” Thomas said, full of remorse. “I told mama I would come back for her, but I never did. I left her there to be abused and mistreated. What kind of a son is that?” He asked the question which must have tormented him his entire life.

“How old were you?” She already knew, but he needed to hear it for himself.

“Eleven, twelve,” he said.

“You were eleven years old. Did you really expect to come back and stand up to Pa? He was a nasty, bitter man who cared only for himself and his whiskey. He would have killed you for sure if you had come back. He would have no problem doing it—you weren’t his.”

“It’s not that simple. I’ve had to live with this...”

“Would it help you to know that mama never once said ill things of you because you didn’t come back? She hated herself for making you leave—on your own at such a tender age. She had been afraid that you were hurt or dead until she received your letter. Thomas, that one letter changed the course of her life and mine. It gave her hope and released her from fearing for your life every day. It changed mine because, if you’ll have me, I want to be your family.”

She waited.

“I still don’t have a clue why you want to be with me.”

She gave him a bright smile. “Ouch.” She winced and flexed her jaw, testing the forgotten pain in her burning cheek. “I want you because I want us,” she continued. “I want it because it’s what mama wanted.”

“You need to get that cut looked at.” He rubbed her unscathed cheek.

Dr. Colvin rushed into the room and promptly scowled at Liam, who shrugged. “She was cut with a knife, Doc. I didn’t wait around to see how bad it was.”

Cameron removed the cloth so he could examine her wound. “Well,” he said, poking and gently prodding. “It’s not that deep, but you’re going to have a slight scar.”

Thomas swore. Cameron hadn’t thought that far ahead. She touched her cheek, casting the doctor a worried look.

“It’s a straight cut at least. I can bandage it so that it will end up healing into a scar slightly wider than a strand of thread. It’s about three inches long, it’s not horrid.” He was kind enough to reassure, “You’ll still be just as beautiful as you are now.”

She was surprised to have any more tears left—she never considered herself to be vain, but was troubled at the thought of having a three inch scar in the middle of her cheek. Anger rose up in her towards Charlotte. This is what an undeserved hate and jealousy did. It had been easier to feel sorry for her.

“I need to bandage it up right away. The lighting is not good here. I need you in my office.”

They both looked at Thomas, whose jaw was clenched, looking ready to kill.

Chapter Twenty-Six

Cameron brought herself to Spillman’s Creek, lingering there with its good and bad memories. It being one place she could find solace and oddly enough, comfort. She pulled up her knees to her chest and sat in the dewy grass. She thought about her last visit to this place of treasure. She might not feel as lost and destitute as that long ago and cold winter’s day, but she had yet to feel whole and satisfied with her life.

A squirrel stopped in front of her for one brief second before scurrying away, causing a warm smile to grace Cameron’s lips. Joy and happiness filled her spirit where Thomas was concerned. He was learning how not only to be a brother, but guardian and protector as well, making her proud of his efforts. She appreciated the attempts he made at making her part of his life, at his endeavors to create a family between them. But still, she was not content and her heart was unsettled. There was nothing else in her life that needed her attention. She had Thomas, Jake remained her friend, she and Lacey were closer than ever. That left Andrew.

Andrew. When had her adoration for him grown beyond caring friendship? When had the stirrings of her heart begun to think of him more often than she should? He was an example of kindness, love and a non-threatening resource for people who wanted to know of his God—the God he claimed loves all, sinners included; sinners such as herself.

A splashing sound came from the flowing creek and broke Cameron out of her reverie. She got up to stretch her legs, going in the direction of the water’s edge. As she walked she felt her insides tremble slightly. Cameron had a strange feeling as the urgent, unexplainable and intense sensation escalated. She was about to experience something beyond her understanding. But how? Why?

She stooped to touch the water. It was running cold and fast. Suddenly all her past, the loneliness, the years of anger, and the self-doubt erupted in a flood of tears. She sobbed deeply, painfully. Why was she crying? Questions tumbled through her mind.

This God Andrew speaks of...could He really love her so unconditionally, so completely? Would
He
want the girl who had been deserted by all the significant people in her life?