Learning to Stand (11 page)

“
What’s got your goat, Alex?
I’ve never known you to quit anything. Why this? And why now? You
didn’t even warn them. You just disbanded the men.”

“
I have another contract out
on my life.”

“
And? That’s been true for
the last two and a half years.”

Alex shook her head. Patrick let the silence
lag.

“
I miss them,” Alex said.
“That’s all. I wish...”

“
The Admiral assured me. If
you need to leave the Army, we’ll make it work. No one should have
to endure what you’ve been through. And to be treated like this? By
people who say they are your friends?”

“
It’s like being assaulted
again.”

“
It is an assault,” Patrick
said. “Plain and simple, they took advantage of you.”

“
What about the President
and his friend?”

“
The President’s been
informed that the Fey is not available. He doesn’t like it much,
but he’ll survive. Why don’t you take some leave?”

“
And what? Watch the
construction workers put up dry wall?”

“
You could stay at our
house,” Patrick said. “Your mother would love to see
you.”

“
Yeah, I bet. She can gloat.
She always said women shouldn’t be soldiers.”

“
Oh honey,” Patrick
said.

“
Sorry, Dad. I’m pretty
grim.”

“
I was pretty grim when I
was in your position.”

“
What helped?” Alex
asked.

“
I got out of my own way,”
Patrick said. “I gave commands and not requests. I spoke my mind
and let the chips fall where they may, even with my friends. I
became a leader by acting like one.”

Alex reacted viscerally to his last
statement. Opening her mouth, she turned to say something. Shaking
her head at her father, she placed and lit another incense stick at
each grave stone. She paused at Charlie O’Brien’s stone then walked
back to her father.

“
You’re saying I can quit if
I want to or I can choose to be a leader.”

“
Yes, that’s what I’m
saying,” Patrick said.

“
I don’t know what to do
next,” she said.

“
Take your time. Maybe you
should schedule a day at the spa.” He laughed at the revulsion on
her face. “Call Matthew. He was your second in command. And,
according to your sister, he is right now packing for rural
Afghanistan. I’ll tell you this, Alexandra. He had no idea you were
upset. When Colonel Gordon read off the incidents, Matthew asked to
be relieved of his rank. He gave no explanation and made no excuse.
He only said he lost track of himself.”

Alex nodded.

“
Honey, you have to step
into your own power,” he said. “You’ve hidden behind your twin,
under Ben’s wing, or even as my daughter for too long. You’re
better than all of us combined. Let yourself shine for a
while.”

Alex sighed.

“
Your mother asked me if you
might consider coming for dinner,” he said. “We’ve invited Colin
and Julie. Your mother is focused on Julie’s pregnancy, she won’t
bother you much.”

“
Fixated on her first
grandchild.”

“
Julie is about to
pop.”

“
So get to work?”

“
How about breakfast?”
Patrick asked. “There’s a wonderful greasy spoon not far from here.
I haven’t been there in an age. Let’s give the Secret Service
something to worry about.”

“
Thanks Dad,” Alex said.
“But I need to deal with this.”

“
Good Girl.”

FFFFF

An hour and a half later
Wednesday mid-morning

March 26 – 11:45 AM

Wahoo’s Fish Tacos, Denver, Colorado

“
I’ve requested to be
relieved of my rank,” Matthew said.

Alex picked up a chip looked at it then set
it back in the basket of tortilla chips on the table. They were the
only people sitting on the narrow end of the patio right off the
parking lot. The late winter sun peeked out from behind the clouds,
but it was still cool. Inside, the restaurant was filling with an
early lunch crowd.

“
And?”

“
Come on, Alex. You never
said a word to me. Not one word.”

“
You are an adult, an
officer in the US Army, for God’s sake. I need to tell you you’re
insubordinate? Disobeying a direct order as you did again this
morning?”

Matthew’s mouth fell open. His face flushed
red.

“
When I heard the list of
incidents?” Matthew shook his head. “I couldn’t believe it. And I
knew the list was HALF of what has happened. I...”

“
You’re just a complete
asshole? For most of a year?”

“
I have racked my mind as to
why I behaved so badly,” Matthew said. “You’ve seen my file. There
is not one report of insubordination, disrespect or anything
else.”

“
Until you started working
for me.”

“
Exactly.”

“
So it’s my
fault.”

“
No, it’s my fault,” Matthew
said.

They fell silent as the waiter dropped off
their lunch. Not sure of what to do next, Alex focused trying to
eat her rice, beans and charbroiled fish. Matthew cut open his
burrito then threw his utensils on the table.

“
Fuck,” he said.

Crossing his arms, he looked away from her.
When he turned back, his eyes were filled with tears.

“
When you were injured, I
thought I would do anything I could do for you to survive, even one
more day. When you told me you were building a team, I jumped at
the chance to work with you. I took the chance and fucked it up. In
the process, I’ve betrayed you, took you for granted and destroyed
our friendship.”

“
I don’t understand why,”
Alex said. “We’ve been friends for more than a decade. I rescued
your ass. TWICE!”

“
I lost track of myself. I
used you until there wasn’t anything left to use. I live in your
condo. I sleep with your sister. I spent the raise you got for me
with abandon. I’ve been focused on my life, my status and... I
don’t know… where we were going to dinner.”

“
There’s no way this is ever
going to work,” Alex said. “I need a team, Matthew, not a group of
parasites ready to Hoover up whatever’s available to them. I can’t
create a team by myself. Every single person has to pitch
in.”

Matthew nodded.

“
Why did you give Flagg his
papers without consulting me?”

“
I don’t know,” Matthew
said. “He’s such an asshole. So smug and superior. I guess I
thought it would knock him down to earth.”

“
And you didn’t tell me
because...?”

“
I have no excuse,” Matthew
said. “I didn’t tell you because I’m an arrogant, insubordinate
prick.”

“
That’s honest,” Alex said.
Unable to look at the food, Alex pushed the plate away from her.
“What do you want to do?”

“
I want to build a team. I
want to succeed at the mission of building a multi-unit team to
extract hostages from around the world. There are hundreds, if not
thousands of hostages who need rescuing. In betraying you, I have
betrayed them as well.”

“
I cannot do this myself,
Matthew,” Alex said. “If you agree to help me, you have to get and
keep everyone in line. They are not your playmates. They are your
teammates.”

“
Yes,” he said. “Troy feels
as bad as I do. Raz didn’t say a word. He just left for Washington.
And Hutchins? I mean, I got to know him when he was your roommate
at Walter Reed but I don’t think I really respected him until
today. He simply listened to what Colonel Gordon said and signed
the document.”

“
I heard he was trying for a
medical.”

“
Emily,” Matthew said. “He
nodded his head and left. Let me ask you this. What do you
want?”

“
I’m not sure,” Alex said.
“I’ve given up on a team. Right now, I’d like to take a
bath.”

“
Still no hot
water?”

“
We have hot water. It
hasn’t made it to the bathtub yet.”

Unsure of how to move forward, they each
fell silent.

“
What will you do?” Matthew
asked.

“
I’m not sure. I have a lot
of options including being a housewife for my soon to be wealthy
surgeon husband.”

“
Is there any possibility of
a second chance?” Matthew asked.

Alex looked over Matthew’s shoulder to the
Denver skyline. The clouds were rolling in again. They would see
snow again before nightfall. Looking around her, she noted the
office professionals were venturing onto the patio.

“
Sure. But not a
third.”

“
Yes sir,” Matthew said. “I
will speak with the men. I will get their agreement to work toward
a team or they will not be on the team. Period.”

Alex nodded. They walked through the patio
toward their vehicles.

“
And our
friendship?”

Alex shrugged.

“
Well, at least there’s a
chance.”

She gave him a slight smile. He stood and
held his arms out. They hugged. He kissed her cheek.

“
Thanks.”

She nodded.

“
I’m going home. You’ll let
me know?”

“
Yes sir.”

Walking along the wall of the restaurant,
they were standing in an empty parking space next to Alex’s Jeep CJ
when Matthew said, “Do you want to…”

Alex heard a sound her mind refused to
interpret. A starburst of blood and tissue popped into the air from
Matthew chest. Matthew fell forward to the asphalt.

F

CHAPTER NINE

Jumping to Matthew, she felt mammoth hands
clamp onto her shoulders.

The large man threw her against the mural on
the restaurant wall. Managing to stay on her feet, Alex jammed her
elbow into the man’s solar plexus. He fell back. Rotating her leg,
she threw a roundhouse kick in her assailant’s direction. To avoid
her kick, he stepped back and tripped over a parking curb. He fell
backward landing on his behind.

She rushed to Matthew’s side. Pressing her
knit cap into the bullet hole, she turned him onto his back. He had
a gaping wound in his chest. She threw her down jacket over him for
warmth. She pulled off her sweater to put under Matthew’s head.
Using all her weight, she pressed her wool scarf and turtleneck
into the wound. His eyes popped open when her shadow crossed his
face. Matthew grabbed her hand.

“
Boy Scout,” Matthew
whispered. “Get the motherfucker.”

Sensing movement, Alex raised her left arm
to catch a blow. Her arm made a sickening pop.

And Alex shifted from friend to fighter.
Breathing out, all pain disappeared. Lifelong training kicked in.
Jumping to her feet, she attempted another kick. Her left hip
ground metal against metal.

The Boy Scout laughed at her effort. His
closed fist punch collided with her cheekbone. She fell two steps
back before catching her footing on the edge of the building.
Looking for his advantage, the Boy Scout circled her.

A woman in the patio screamed. Three men ran
toward to help Alex.

“
Stay back. He will kill
you.” Alex screamed. “Call 911. Tell them Homeland Security agents
need immediate assistance. Do it. NOW!”

Rotating from the growing crowd, her eyes
locked with the Boy Scout’s eyes. His entire being seethed with
rage at her. Her breath caught in her throat.

He stepped toward her. Pulling his right arm
back, he swung the sap toward her face. Alex dunked under his arm.
As she moved past him, he grabbed the arm holes of her body armor
and threw her against the wall of the building. She landed against
the building with a thud.

Pressing Alex to the wall, he smashed his
body against hers. Her back slammed against the wall. When her body
bounced forward, he mashed his mouth onto her mouth. He forced his
tongue past her teeth. He ripped open her jeans.

Jerking up, she slammed her knee into his
crotch. Her martial arts trained hands created a few inches of
space between them. When he shifted back, she hit him with a strong
front kick.

He fell back.

She moved from the wall to the open parking
space.

Raising her left forearm, she blocked his
fist. She punched the heel of her right hand into his larynx.
Clutching his throat, he stumbled backwards into the parking
lot.

She fastened her jeans. Shifting to her left
leg, she threw another round house kick. With the grinding in her
hip, the blow glanced off his chest.

He charged her. Stepping aside, she
redirected his motion. He flew over her hip landing a foot from the
building.

Driven by fury and lust, he jumped to his
feet. He raised his right hand as if to hit her again. Then,
avoiding her block, he slammed his left fist into her face.

Shifting, she caught him in the chest with a
powerful back kick. He smashed into the building behind him. Using
the wall for leverage, he rushed her.

She rotated sideways, caught his right hand
in a lock. Using his momentum, his arm rotated and his shoulder
popped from the joint. He dropped to his knees.

Reaching behind his head, he flipped her
over him. She landed on her back in front of him.