Just Fall (The Fall Series) (5 page)

YOU CAN’T GO BACK

As
soon as my eyes opened images of what happened the night before replayed in my
head. I needed coffee, a shower and a plan in that order. I headed for the
kitchen trying to imagine what the day would bring.

There
was one thing I was sure of. Parker Blackwell was dangerous. The emotions that
stirred inside of me when I was close to him were… My body began to recall how
his hands and mouth had me on the edge, but my mind quickly stopped it from
going there.

I
remembered Nina’s warning and decided I would dress much less provocatively
around him.  After all, I didn’t want to give him any indication that I was
interested in anything more than his friendship or invite him to repeat what
happened the night before, because honestly if there was a next time I wasn’t sure
I could resist.

I
went to the closet and chose a girlish sundress. No cleavage, not too much leg,
and definitely no sexy shoes. Yep, simple flat flip-flops would do. Oh, and a
ponytail. I don’t know why, but guys hate ponytails. Jake does anyway. Yep!
Today I would be “plain Jane” as my mom would say.

Proud
of myself I strutted off to the shower. He might be bigger than me now,
stronger than me, but there’s one thing I was sure of—he wasn’t smarter than
me. I was going to enjoy the day with Mary and Tom and keep Parker in check. I
wouldn’t let him push my buttons. Nope. Today was going to be a great day.

I
rounded the corner to the lobby feeling confident that I could keep his
pheromones in check, especially with my new plain Jane look, which I was
pulling off flawlessly. Tom and Mary were waiting on the bench by the door, and
their faces lit up when they saw me. I looked around quickly my heart beating
faster.
Where is he?

Reading
the look on my face, Mary spoke up, “He went to get us coffee, dear. He’ll be
right back.”

God!
Am I that obvious? Don’t be a wild boar, Lo!

“Oh,
who?” I feigned indifference. Mary smiled.

Right
on cue Parker entered looking just as deliciously seductive as he did last
night…
with his head leaning back against the wall. Stop it, Lo!

“Tom
this one’s for you.” He reached in front of me and handed Tom his to-go cup.

“Mary,
your chai tea.” Mary smiled up at him sweetly.

“And
for you, Lauren, vanilla latte. I don’t know what you like, but I’m sure
vanilla is a safe bet,” he winked at me as he handed me my cup. “Oh, and here’s
your room key. I forgot to give it back to you last night.”

All
the color drained from my face as it went instantly blank. My mouth dropped
open, and I glanced quickly at Mary and Tom, their eyes were wide, their expressions
priceless.

I
forced a stiff smile and replied through gritted teeth, “Why thank you Parker.
I see you’re just as thoughtful as ever this morning. And thank you for walking
me to my room last night. I was so sick I had all I could do not to vomit all
over your expensive shoes. I must have rushed to the bathroom so fast that I
didn’t even remember to ask for my room key back.”

Bastard!
Nice save, Lo. I sure hope they believed you.

Mary
and Tom were looking at us, and I could tell by their expressions they weren’t
sure what to make of our little exchange.

I
changed the subject quickly, “Are we ready to go?”

“I’m
ready,” Mary sighed. “I’ve been waiting to take this tour for fifteen years.
This is the first time Tom agreed to it.”

She
pulled a brochure from her purse. “Our first stop will be Chateau Fontaine, and
Parker volunteered to be our designated driver for the day. Isn’t that nice,
Lo?”

“Yes.
He’s such a nice guy that Parker. A perfect gentleman really,” I managed.

He
eyed me suspiciously. I knew he was trying to get me to engage, but I had
outsmarted him for now. He must be disappointed, confused even.
Poor guy!

Tom
held the door, and I followed Mary out into the sunlit sidewalk. I hoped he
would get the picture. I’m not going to join him in his silly little dance
today. But when Jim, our valet, pulled up with his car I almost caved.

I’ve
seen plenty of fancy sports cars up here, and I knew exactly what kind of
arrogant rich boys were behind the wheel-the kind that used Daddy’s bankroll to
pay for them.
The bastard drives a Mercedes! And not just any Mercedes. I
don’t even recognize the model!

When
Jim got out it was clear that even he was impressed. “This is one beautiful
car, sir. I’ve never seen one like it, and I’ve parked a lot of ‘em over the
years.”

Parker
was instantly intrigued. “Thanks. Yeah, she’s a beauty! A Maybach Landaulet to
be exact.”

Letting
out a long low whistle, Jim opened the back door for Mary and continued talking
about the car. “Bet you got her after winning the WTP in Australia, huh?”

“Nope.
After that one I bought the Aston Martin One-77, but I thought the Mercedes
would be more comfortable for my passengers.” Parker smirked at me.

My
mind was clinging to the word
‘WTP’.
Did he mean World Tournament of
Poker? Parker is a poker player?

I
should’ve known he wouldn’t choose a professional career, like a doctor or
lawyer, although his parents’ money could have paid for either. But a poker
player? By the looks of this car he must be quite successful, unless his mommy
was funding everything. I couldn’t help myself. I was desperate to find out.

It
took all the determination I had to keep my mouth shut as we drove up the coast.
Mary took the liberty of filling in the silence, and her endless chatter
provided a welcome relief. The longer we drove the lighter the mood became.
Until we were all laughing comfortably and talking about all sorts of things
together.

At
one point Mary was telling us about a funny argument that occurred between
Sarah and her new husband over the number of children they each wanted.
Everyone was laughing, and from the corner of my eye I saw Parker looking at
me. Things were going well so far. Better than expected, really, that is until he
suddenly changed the direction of the conversation.

Looking
in the rear view mirror he asked Tom and Mary, “Did you know our Lauren is
engaged? Tell us all about your fiancé, Lo. What’s he like? I’ll bet he’s a
real swell guy.”

Our
Lauren? Swell guy? Since when does Parker say swell? I knew exactly what he was
trying to do.

I
could hear the excitement in Mary’s voice from the backseat. “Lo, you never
mentioned you were engaged! Congratulations, dear! Where is the lucky fella?
I’d love to meet him.”

“Yes,
where is the lucky fella, Lo?” Parker mocked as he looked at me with those
piercing green eyes full of mischief.

I’ll
be damned if I’m going to let this asshole slam Jake! He couldn’t measure up if
he tried! Be careful. Don’t take the bait, Lo!

I
forced a smile and laughed casually. “His name is Jake,” I said, looking Parker
straight in the eye, “And he’s amazing. Too bad he’s out of town this weekend.
I know he’d love to meet you, too.” Rolling my eyes I returned my attention to
the view out the passenger window.

“Well,
too bad for him, huh? I mean that he’s out of town.” The corners of his mouth
curled slightly when he smiled. And then it happened. The air seemed still, and
I had to crack my window to breath. Pheromones
. Damn him! I mean can he
really use them on demand?

When
he looked my way again I flipped him the bird cautiously so that our passengers
couldn’t see, and his eyes grew wide as he clutched his chest in fake shock.
He
was impossible!

“Enough
about me, Parker. Who’s the lucky lady in your life these days? Or should I say
ladies?”

“I
travel too much to have a
lady,”
his voice trailed off at the end
sending a subtle message to me.

I
knew exactly what he meant. There were many and probably none of them ladies.
The thought made me squirm in my seat and had me adjusting my seatbelt to get
comfortable.
Time to change the subject!

The
sign announcing we had arrived at the first winery was a welcome relief. I exhaled
deeply as I exited the car and smiled at the sight of Mary anxiously tugging Tom
toward the building.  I started to follow after them when Parker’s voice
stopped me in my tracks.

“Lo,
wait a minute.”

“Yeah,
I’ll wait a minute alright!” I spun around to face him, taking the room key out
of my purse and tossing it at him. “What kind of stunt was that anyway? I’m
sure some woman at my hotel is hoping this is a sign you’ll be back for round
two tonight, huh?”

“It’s
my room key, Lo. It was just a joke. Mary was asking me fifty questions about
where I was last night. I think she was suspecting I was with you, so… It was
too easy. I’m sorry. I should’ve thought about it I guess, but that’s not what
I wanted to talk about.”

My
stomach did a back flip and tied itself into a million double knots. I was
afraid to turn around, and as I watched the door close behind Mary and Tom I
knew I had to face him, all six feet of deliciously sculptured, dangerously
fuckable, and extremely frustrating Parker Blackwell. It took everything I had
not to want him more than my next breath.

“Look,
Parker, if this is about last night I…”

“What
do you mean
if
Lo? It’s more than just last night. It’s the way you’ve
made me feel ever since I met you, the way you feel when you’re with me.”

My
heart was slamming in my chest. I couldn’t deny how much I wanted him.
What
the fuck did he want from me?

“The
way
I
feel? Being with you is torture. Everything’s a game to you,
Parker. Whatever we had or whatever we were when we were kids, it’s still the
same. I mean it’s different. Fuck, I don’t know what I mean anymore! What I do
know is that you left me. You left me when I needed you the most, and now we
can’t go back.”

Frustration
got the best of me and as much as I wanted to explain, I couldn’t find the
right words. Then it came to me. “We’re all grown up now. I’m a business owner.
You’re a poker player. I’m engaged, and you’re still putting notches in your
bedpost.”

Parker
was looking at the ground, his brow creased. He looked deep in thought, and I
could see the storm brewing as his eyes grew dark. I held my breath and braced
myself for the backlash, but instead his voice was surprisingly calm. Almost
too calm.

“Lo,
I understand why you’d think that, and in a lot of ways you’re right. I can’t
deny the number of women I’ve been through. With my looks, personality and
profession it kind of goes with the territory. But honestly none of them has
ever challenged me like you do. Not one. I know what you need, Lo, and I want
to give it to you. I should have never left you back then. If you’d give me a chance
I could make it up to you. I want to give you everything. We understand each
other.”

Things
were moving too fast, and my mind was whirling. I tried to steer the
conversation away from what we both knew was hanging in the balance. The things
left unsaid, the chemistry, the unresolved. “They haven’t challenged you? How
could that be possible? I mean with
your
looks, personality and
profession?” I fired back, covering my face then shoving my hands deep into my
hair.

I
couldn’t look at him, but I felt his eyes studying me. That’s when I realized I
had two reactions whenever I was near him. I either wanted to run away or
fight. Fight him. Fight myself. It was fight or flight. All or nothing, and
when we engaged like this I had to resist the urge to rip his clothes off and
unleash my pent up frustration on him. He was like a shot of tequila, tempting,
strong and unpredictable. Would the initial burn be worth the invincible
feeling waiting on the other side, or would I just lose control?

“You’re
right, Lo. Some things are the same. You still put your hands in your hair when
you’re frustrated. You hide your face when you don’t want me to see what’s
going on behind those beautiful yellow eyes of yours. You’re still my fantasy,
and we’re still like gasoline and fire together. So, I have to know, does this
man you plan to marry really know you? Does he make you passionate, push you
until you’re ready to unravel?” He paused as if he were waiting for me to
answer. “I already know the truth. If he did you wouldn’t be here right now.”

“You
have no idea, Parker! Jake loves me. He wants what’s best for me, and he’s not
going anywhere. You on the other hand? You’re a gamble. You always have been,
and whether it’s seven, ten or twenty years later you always will be.”

“You’re
settling, Lo. I can see it all over your face.”

“That’s
the best you can come up with? Well, I’m sorry you’ve grown bored with having
one meaningless encounter after the next, but whatever twisted idea you have
about me and you it’s never going to work! I’m not here for your entertainment,
and I don’t base my life on challenges, silly games or bets for that matter.
We’d be crazy to think that we could last more than one hour together let alone
a lifetime! And you think I’m settling? That I’d be so much better off with
you? Do these lines really work for you, Parker? Please! You’ll never know what
I need!”