In My Head (4 page)

I’m sure my face is showing the proper look of outrage at the phrase “fifteen minutes.” “What do you mean fifteen minutes? Can’t we try for more if she leaves us alone?” We’re both naked, finally, and I rush over to him. Grabbing his length in my hand, watching his eyes nearly roll back.

“Sunshine, that little girl is going to want something ridiculous in a matter of minutes.
Olaf
isn’t going to keep her entertained long enough for us to make this long and sweet.” His hands take my shoulders and he guides me backwards towards the bed. When the back of my knees hit the mattress he forces me down.

I scoot back onto the bed, while he crawls over top of me as I go. “Well, let’s get this done then,” I tell him on a sigh, feigning disinterest in this.

Ben raises his eyebrow and instantly thrusts himself into me. Totally catching me off guard, causing me to moan. Loudly. He leans down and presses a kiss against my lips, instantly shushing my moans.

Pulling out slowly, he thrusts back in. Hard. Little gasps leaving my mouth every time he fully seats himself in me. “God, Ben.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” A cheeky grin spreads across his face, and he leans up away from me. To rise in between my legs on his knees. Both of his hands are resting on my thighs as he continues his leisurely thrusts. He moves his right hand and his fingers brush against my clit. Making my whole body jolt and clench down on him.

I open my eyes and stare into his, I can see the sweat beginning to form on his forehead. Those fingers that brushed my clit make their way up my stomach, to my breasts, lightly brushing against each nipple causing them to harden under his touch. His eyes bore into mine as he raises his hand further, using the two fingers that began this, to part my lips. My tongue snakes out, and licks at the tips and I close my mouth around them. Drawing them into my mouth further.

Sucking on his fingers is oddly erotic, I wouldn’t think I would find the subtle taste of myself on him intoxicating but it is. Moaning because of the taste of myself, he quickly pulls his fingers free of my mouth with a grunt. I’m shocked when Ben places his hand over my mouth. Blocking me from breathing or talking. My eyes widen when I take in his salacious grin.

His thrusts pick up, and now I know why he has covered my mouth. He wants to fuck me, but I need to be quiet. We usually always have to find time to have sex now with Kay walking around. But it’s like our daughter has an internal sense of when we’re doing the deed, because she always interrupts us. Even in the middle of the night.

Which is why we chose the middle of the day. This is our attempt at throwing off the radar in her head.

With his hand still covering my mouth his hips start to piston into me. The sounds of sex all around me. I close my eyes, and focus on it all. The weight of his hand covering my mouth is enough to make me clench down on his length with nothing else. We don’t have the time to pull out the full kink, but this is enough for right now.

The sound of the skin on his toned body slapping into mine, causes goosebumps to travel down my arms. The sounds he’s making, but trying desperately to stifle, are enough to send me over the edge. But my husband doesn’t have to tell me that I need to wait for him.

He loves when we come together. Unless we have more than a few minutes at a time. Then my husband could spend hours worshipping my body. I’ve never felt so wanted in my life when my husband stares down at me with a look that says he knows he’s a God, and is the only person who can take care of me like this.

I dart my tongue out of my mouth and lick at his palm, our signal that I want to talk. He removes his hand and it immediately attaches to my hip to hold me in place. “Ben, I’m close. I don’t know how long I can hold off,” I pant out. I raise my hands above my head to fist them in the pillows. I widen my legs as far as I can for him. “Come on, Ben. Fuck me,” I growl.

I chant “fuck me” under my breath a couple times, until he completely lets go. His fingers dig into my hip bones. I fist my hands deeper into the pillows, pulling one down over my face so I can muffle the noises I can’t control from slipping free.

“Lyla . . . Oh, God. Now!” He grunts and slams into my one more time and I let go to fall over the edge with him. He slows his thrusts. “Babe, your pussy is clenching around me so tight. Milking me for everything I’ve got.”

“Shut up, will ya? Let me ride this out.” He releases my hips and brushes his fingers against my clit. “Fuck! Stop! I’m too sensitive right now for you to be messing with me!”

“Daddy!” The shrill scream of our toddler interrupts us from doing anything else.

“You locked the door right?” The panic in my voice is evident.

“Yes! God, at least we finished this time. Let me get rid of this condom and I’ll throw my pants back on while you get cleaned up.” He pulls out. And instantly his whole demeanor changes. “Uh, babe?”

My panic intensifies instantly. “What? What is it?” I’m practically as shrill as our daughter.

“I forgot to use a condom.”

Well, hell. “We should be, okay. Right? I mean, I haven’t had my period in like . . .” I mentally count the days. “Oh, fuck. I’m pretty sure I’m ovulating.”

I look up at Ben to see him smirking at me. “I can’t say I’m sorry if you end up pregnant, you know I love kids and I love you pregnant.” He leans back down to place a gentle kiss against my lips. “God, I’m excited now. I wish we were able to know sooner.”

“Yeah, that’s not how this works and you know it.” Do I want another baby? Yes, absolutely. Do I want one now? Well, I guess it’s a little too late for that.

“I love you, Sunshine.” My husband smiles at me, and climbs off the bed. Leaving me to wonder if we’re really ready for another baby.

Exactly nine months, four days later

“I’M SORRY? WHAT DID
you say?” I stare at the doctor in disbelief.

“I need to break your water, which won’t hurt that bad. Just a little discomfort. Then I’m going to attach a head monitor to the baby. That . . . will hurt,” my doctor tells me.

This is the second time Ben and I have been here. In this hospital. In this very room. And let me tell you . . . it’s no more pleasant this time around than it was last time. MaKayla came around two years ago. Almost nine months after we got married. Cue side-eyed Emoji here. We’re awaiting the arrival of Kody. The boy we prayed for so we could be officially done having kids.

“You didn’t have to do this last time,” I grind out.

“I know, Lyla. But times have changed. So you’re getting the head monitor.”

I sigh. Fuck him. And fuck Ben for getting me here again. “Whatever.” I scoot down on the bed, widening my legs so the doctor can fit his huge hand up my vagina. Christ in a handbasket that
hurts!

“You guys need to find a better way of doing that. Jesus! Oh! Send the nurse back in here with the anesthesia form. I’m getting that shit this time. You guys aren’t talking me out of it either.” The doctor assures me he’ll send the nurse in.

I hear Ben chuckling beside me. Asshole. “If I could force you to carry a baby for nine months and have you go through the labor, I totally would.”

“I know, baby. Believe me, I know. I would absolutely trade places with you in a heartbeat. You know I don’t like it when you’re in pain.” Le sigh. This man. This breathtaking, caring, strong, lovable man is mine. And he’s fucking perfect.

SOME HOURS LATER I’M
holding my beautiful baby boy and we’re back in our normal room. Ben is trying to catch a little bit of sleep on the uncomfortable couch, that way he can stay up with Kody for a little bit tonight. And I can sleep.

I refuse to put him down. And if I do, I place him between my legs on the bed. I freaking love newborns. Their smell, their little noises, just everything about them. I keep stroking a finger down the side of his cheek. Every once and a while his eyes will flutter open and they’ll lock on mine. Like he knows exactly who I am.

“Babe, are you going to put him down at all?” A sleepy Ben asks from a few feet over.

Without looking at him I reply, “Nope. I just want to snuggle him.”

“Well, it’s time for you to get some rest. I want some snuggle time with my boy. I have to start instilling in him some very serious life lessons.” I snort and cast a look at him, and he has the biggest grin on his face. “C’mon, woman. Give me my baby!” He stands up from the couch and comes to stand next to the bed.

Giving him a mock glare, I carefully transfer the sleepy baby into my husband’s arms. Once Kody is settled, he grabs the blanket from the bed and heads back to the couch. I’m basically pouting before he turns back around and comes back to give me a soft, lingering kiss.

“He’s beautiful, babe. You did great. We made another amazing kid.” He smiles a heart stopping smile and goes back to his couch. I’m telling you, all these emotions and having a husband that actually cares? There is nothing more right in the world than this feeling right here.

“Hey, Ben?” He just got himself situated on the couch.

“Yeah, babe?” Kody is lying on his chest, and he’s covering him with the blanket. Making sure he’s snug.

“I love you.” He just lightly kisses our son’s head and whispers that he loves me too.

Present Day

MOVING ROUGHLY TWO
hours away with a baby that wants to crawl and get into everything? Not on my list of things that I ever wanted to do. But it’s necessary. We’re finally into our new house and getting settled. The house we bought is a beautiful two-story house in a neutral cream color, with a darker tan shutters, a wraparound porch, and a nice size back yard. Inside it has three bedrooms, two full bathrooms, and a very open first floor. It seriously couldn’t have been any more perfect than if we had it built ourselves.

Ben is working on taking over the tattoo shop he purchased, that’s been his dream for a long time. He doesn’t want to tattoo anyone; he just wants to run the business side of it. That’s what he thrives in doing. All that number shit just frustrates the hell out of me.

Me? I’m staying home with the kids. Ben just happened to have a college fund that was nearly double more than what he needed so we’re sitting pretty right now. Allowing me the luxury of staying home with my kids.

Today, though, I want something to do just to get out of this house for a little bit. So I call my mom.

After just a few rings she picks up. “Hey, sweetie. What are you doing?”

“Oh, nothing. Is there any chance you’re at home and not doing anything?”

Her laugh travels through the phone. “Do you need a couple hours to yourself?”

“Oh my god, yes.” I sigh into the phone, trying to not sound anxious to get rid of my kids. But, lord, I need a couple of hours to myself.

“All right, you can bring them over. Just bring Kody’s little pack and play in case he wants to take a nap. I have plenty of toys for them both though.”

“You’re a God send, Mom. I love you! We’ll see you soon!” I hurry up and end the phone call before she can change her mind on me.

I start running around the house grabbing everything my mom might need for a couple hours, which ends up being two bags for each kid. Over kill? Yes, yes it is. I take a squealing little girl out to the car, evidently I’m not as cool as Gramma. Once I have her all strapped in, I run back in to grab Kody and the bags. Loading everything and Kody into the car I shut the door. Breathing a sigh of relief, I scramble around the car and in the driver door.