If We Dare to Dream (44 page)

As he had predicted, the cloud cover moved off a lot faster than he would have made it down. In the distance, he could hear the water coursing through the Basin, and he knew then that leaving Jamie’s side would have been tragic. He lay beside Jamie, gently stroking her hair and staring into her pale face as she slept. She was so beautiful, that for the first time in years he felt the emotion overwhelm him. Lowering his face to the crook of Jamie’s neck, he finally gave in to Jamie’s request and sobbed. He allowed the tears to fall, embraced them, felt the emotion of the last ten years of his life rise in one long sob of pain. If she heard his anguish, she did not respond, and although he did not expect her to he wished she could see that he finally had opened up.

Blazing hot tears dripped to the cold, damp rock beneath him as he lay in the growing darkness. As the minutes passed, he realized that he did not feel the discomfort of the chill any more. He had stopped shivering some time ago, leaving him with just the feel of Jamie. Soft and loving Jamie. He remembered the last time he heard her laugh. It mingled in his mind with that of Adam’s laughter. Both of them happy and able to enjoy life in a way he had never been able to. Until he met her. Until she had saved him.

He had no urge to move, not even when he heard the low deep rumble of the helicopter motor. Too weak and cold to rise, he did not even try to greet them. He could not leave her.

She had never left him.

***

A touch on the top of his head brought Andrew awake with a start. At first the events came rushing back as though another of his night terrors, but when he sat up abruptly and swiveled in his chair all the confusion and panic flooded back and mingled into one jumbled mess. Disoriented, he glanced around him. The room was dim, but he could see a light in the hallway beyond the partially closed door. It illuminated the foot of the metal bed, the off-white blankets, and the two legs underneath them. Turning slowly, his gaze followed the legs up to the monitors. The LCD display showed everything had stabilized, so his gaze continued to the prone woman in the bed.

Large brown eyes met his. They blinked, bewildered and muddled.

He gasped. Jamie was awake.

Her hand rested near where she had touched him. He wanted to grab it and press it against his lips over and over again, but he resisted the urge. The IV line was still attached in the crook of her elbow, and she was obviously groggy from the anesthesia they had given her prior to the surgery to repair the muscles in her arm. All he could do was gaze at her stupidly.

“You’re awake,” he whispered.

In answer her hand went to his shoulder, which was encased in a sling. Her eyes questioned silently.

“I’ll be okay,” he said in an attempt to shrug it off. In fact, he would be out of commission for three to four months. “I’m fine.”

Her look was skeptical.

“It’s dislocated and my collarbone fractured, but I’m okay.”

She nodded, but her brow crinkled sympathetically.

“Don’t worry about me. You’re the one who just had surgery.”

Swallowing hard, she managed a slight shake of her head to dismiss his concern.

“How are you feeling?” Andrew glanced around anxiously. “Can I get you anything?”

She shook her head again and closed her eyes. After several minutes of silence, he feared she had fallen asleep again, but then she opened them again. Her voice was rough when she finally spoke. “Adam?”

Reaching for the water resting on the tray beside her, he pressed it to her lips and waited while she took a sip. As he did so, he opened his mouth to answer even though no sound escaped. While he struggled to find the words, a tear slipped free from his eye. Tears of relief, joy, hope, and most especially sadness over losing the brother he had loved. Everything seemed to have crumbled with Adam’s devastating final admission.

“Oh, Andrew,” Jamie whispered.

Her fingers were gentle when she wiped the tear away. However, more followed, so many that she could not keep up. He allowed them free rein; he did not care that he was crying like a child. Replacing the water on the tray, he offered her a definitive shake of his head instead.

Jamie was there. She was with him. He had everything he needed, so why did his heart crack so painfully? “Adam confessed before he…” His voice trailed off before he could say the words.

“No.” Jamie’s eyes drifted closed. Evidently she remembered the police crowded in the emergency room eager to speak with him once they were safely off the mountain. Things had happened so quickly once they were rescued, and they had rushed Jamie off before he had a chance to speak to her. He had no idea what she had heard, seen or even understood at that time.

Squeezing his eyes shut, Andrew thought about the past 24 hours as though he were in a dream. After they had been taken off the mountain, he had gone through long hours of explaining and answering questions despite the pain in his arm and worry for Jamie. By the time Adam’s body had been retrieved, Darren had joined him and immediately his loyal lawyer stepped up on his behalf. His relief from the interrogators was short lived, for then Grandma had arrived. A shudder went through him as he remembered her heartbroken sobs when she greeted him at the hospital. The devastation his brother had brought to his family made his death feel even more selfish. As he had feared, everything had fallen apart in a blink of an eye, but Andrew was determined to put it right once and for all.

“Jamie, I’m sorry - for everything,” he blurted out suddenly. Aware that he was still crying and his voice cracked as he spoke, he pushed through the awkwardness and hesitation to reveal himself fully. “I’ll understand if it’s too much for you. I’ve brought you so much trouble.”

“Shush.” She shook her head and once more pressed her fingers to his lips to prevent him from speaking more. “Don’t say that… You know how I feel about you. Nothing’s changed that.”

He wanted to believe. But he also knew she needed to understand the truth. “It was Adam.”

“I know. I remember.” Moving her hand to cup his cheek, her eyes were earnest when she spoke. “That doesn’t matter to me. In my eyes, it’s all over.”

“God Jamie, when I got his text all I could think about was getting up there. Then I couldn’t find you… I thought I’d lost you.”

She shook her head slightly. “Never. I’m not leaving you - ever.”

“When Adam told me everything, I thought I’d never have the chance to tell you how much I love you, Jamie. You need to know, and I need to say it out loud like I’ve been afraid to until now. I love you. You are my heart and soul. You mean everything to me.”

“I do know,” she whispered.

Her own tears began to spill through her lashes. Afraid to touch her, he allowed them to fall. With amazing strength, her hand captured his in a tight grip.

“What Adam did is not your fault,” she said firmly. “He told me that he owed you so much. He also told me how you protected him all his life… Andrew, you are such a hero.”

Her words did little to raise his spirits, but he wanted them to. God, how he wanted them to. “So much has happened… I’ve been living my life in a fog. I don’t want to do that anymore. I need to live again, Jamie. I need to remember how to laugh. You make me want to do that.”

“I’m happy to hear that.”

Even though he was aware that he was gushing like a child, now that he had started speaking he found that he could not stop. “You’ve come to mean so much more to me than the woman who showed such bravery and honesty when she helped free me from prison. You’re a part of my life. I don’t ever want to lose you, Jamie. I’ll do anything to make you happy. I love you so much.”

When his voice broke a second time, he stopped and pressed her hand to his lips. In her eyes he saw the truth of her words. She really did believe he was a hero, and the love that shone through her pain and discomfort made his heart soar. 

“I love you, Andrew Sheehan, and all I want from you right now is a smile. Will you smile for me?”

Confused by her words, he frowned instead. “A smile?”

“Yes, a smile. A real one,” she whispered. “We’re safe, Andrew. It’s over. We have the rest of our lives ahead of us. Right now, all I want from you is a smile. Just one, and then we can grieve for Adam and what he did.”

With every ounce of energy that he possessed, Andrew proved that he would do anything for her. Though his lips trembled slightly, Jamie’s wide grin eased his discomfort and forced away some of his angst.

“You’re right,” he whispered. “That’s why I love you as much as I do.”

“Andrew, all I can say is…” Her voice trailed off as the sound of her brother’s echoed out in the hall. Their private time was nearly over. Yet her smile remained as her eyes drifted closed wearily, that faint curvature of the lips that he never grew tired of kissing.

“What?”

When her eyes opened, they were glowing. “It’s about time.”

Though the words could be taken in many ways, he knew exactly what she meant. After everything that had happened, after all the trauma he had seen and lived through, he had finally opened to her. Coming to his feet, he stood above her and kissed her forehead then her lips before turning to the door to face the onslaught of her worried family. 

“You’re right, Jamie,” he said with a heavy sigh. “It
is
about time.”

While he may have lost most of his family, he had gained a new one in the form of the Evans clan. The weary concern was reflected on the four faces in multiple ways but also so similarly. It was obvious they cared, and each and every one of them approached him first with heartfelt thanks for taking care of their little sister. There was acceptance in their voices and in the hearty pats on the back they gave him.

As he watched them crowd around Jamie, Andrew realized that she was right all along. They had their entire lives ahead of them. The past was over; the deed was done. While he would always have the memories and perhaps the scars, he did not need to allow it to run his life. It was time for him to put all the horror behind him and start living again. From this point on, he could move forward and live the life he had always wanted. He had the support of the Evans family, and they were giving him the strength to dream again.

While Jamie bravely greeted the new arrivals, Andrew remembered a simple sentence she had said to him during their first encounter. She had lightheartedly told him then that if it were meant to be, it would have been. After all of his pain over the years since those first few words, he had finally come to a conclusion. As far as he was concerned, it was meant to be. Against all odds, she had returned to him, and he had been given another chance. Another chance at life and another chance to find happiness. Perhaps his trials and Adam’s betrayal were all a part of life’s greater purpose for him after all.

If it was meant to be, it would have been.

He smiled down at her again. A true smile. And she stared up at him with one just as real. Though all four Evans brothers were waiting for their turn to gain her attention, she had eyes only for him. The woman whose hand clung to his tightly was everything he needed now, and their future was a blank slate just waiting to be written upon. This time Andrew intended to make every moment count.

The End

Coming February 14, 2012:

Through Winter Skies

The Evans Family, Book Two

One evening changes two lives:

Ten years ago, a home invasion nearly took the life of a 15 year-old-girl, and Zachary Evans became an inadvertent hero. Following the traumatic experience, Zachary continued on to pursue a career with the FBI in the hopes of controlling the criminals who appear as quickly as he puts them away.

The past cannot be denied:

Content with a solitary life, suddenly a new case drops on his desk. One case starts it all, a continuation of the events from ten years ago that still haunt his dreams. A murder in prison followed by a break-out sends Zachary in a desperate search for his childhood friend. Knowing that the escapees still believe her to have something they want, it is a race to find her before they do.

Emotionally and physically scarred following her experience, Emery Flores disappeared into the mountains of Colorado, becoming a reclusive but successful artist with a purpose. Wanting just to be left alone, she is shocked when a face from her past appears at her door moments before a spring storm hits. With news she does not want to hear, Emery is reluctantly thrown back to events she would rather deny.

Everything happens for a reason:

Trapped together during a mountain snowstorm, Zach and Emery are forced to confront the trials that shaped them as adults and in the process renew their bond. As man and woman, they find their connection goes much deeper than they thought and long buried feelings re-emerge. But still the danger is lurking, and Zach finds out that it extends beyond Emery’s case. With ties to a human and drug smuggling ring that claimed the life of a police officer, Zach realizes that Emery may just be the key to blowing the case wide open. The question remains: can he risk her, the woman he loves, for justice?