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CHAPTER 23

Amy

    “I
didn’t sleep with her Amy,” he moans.

    Dillon
is squirming on his bed in agony, holding a fluffy pillow to his ribs as he
lays flat on his back in only his pajama pants.  He’s waiting for me to
give him his pain pills.       I stand over him
with the bottle, glaring at him.

    The
other night was a whirlwind of activity. Detective Douglas had gotten Dillon’s
message about a truck nearly taking us out on the side of the road and that the
man he saw in the drugstore fit the description that I gave of the man that
abused my mother.  I had no idea Dillon saw the guy with the truck at the
drugstore and that he suspected it was him.  Detective Douglas then got a
call from Ellen Schafer warning them about David Schafer, her son, who was on
his way to the ranch to find me.  She warned him that David was not well.
 Candice was able to give Ray and the police a description of the
so-called client and his truck that also fit the description of David Schafer.
 After Ray was able to put all of the details together, he knew where to
find us and the police weren’t far behind.  David Schafer was taken into
custody and Dillon was rushed to the hospital with several cracked ribs.
 They kept him sedated overnight and sent him home this morning with pain
pills.  The pain pills I am refusing to give to him.  We haven’t
talked.  I stayed at the hospital with him, but he was medicated and slept
most of the time.  

    “Why
was she in your room?” I ask, holding the pills far from his reach.

    “Because
I was in your room.  I slept with you.  You were passed out.  I didn’t
even know Candice was in my room until I got up to take my shower.”

    “Why
was she in your shirt?”

    “I
have no fucking idea.  That’s Candice.  She wanted it and took it and
she wanted you to see it.”

    “I
overheard what she said.  She’s right,” I say quietly.

    “What
is she right about Amy?  I heard what she said too and she doesn’t know
you and she certainly doesn’t understand me.  So, tell me what she’s so
right about.”  He’s kind of snippy with me.  He changes positions
again, trying to get comfortable and I start to feel bad.

    I
know nothing happened with Dillon and Candice.  Candice came to the
hospital last night while Dillon was passed out and apologized to me for the
way she treated me.  She said nothing happened between her and Dillon.
 She was genuinely concerned for both of us.  She even hugged me.
 Even though nothing happened between them, I need reassurance from Dillon
about what is happening between us.

    “I’m
not like her.  I’m not good for you.  My mother has a mental illness
and my father is a psycho.  What if something is wrong with me?”

“Amy, there is nothing wrong
with you.  If you need help to deal with what you’ve been through, we’ll
do it together.  Whatever you need.  You have something your mother
never had.  You have me, Laney, my dad, friends...we all care about you.”

“I don’t want you to feel
sorry for me and feel responsible for me and my freak outs.  I’m taking
time away from your passion, the thing you love the most.”

    “What
do I love the most?”

    “The
ranch.”

    “Well,
that’s where you’re wrong.  Can I tell you something?”  He reaches
for my hand and gently pulls me closer to him.  I sit on the edge of the
bed at his side and listen, fumbling with the bottle in my other hand.
 “I’ve lived on this ranch my entire life.  I love it here and there
is no other place for me.  All through school while growing up, kids would
talk about sports, video games and what’s coming on TV that night.  I
didn’t care.  I never fit in. I couldn’t wait to get home and ride the
horses and sit by the lake.  When I went to college, it was the same
story.  I didn’t fit in.  Listen to this, okay.”  He stares
fiercely into my eyes.  “Candice is normal.  She’s like all the rest
of the girls, but she doesn’t fit into my life.  She’s like my mom.
 This life isn’t for her.  She’s made for fashion and high rises.
 You, Amy.  You are made for this life.  You may think you’re
broken, but I swear I’m the piece that’s missing.  Since the day I saw you
behind that fence, I felt this strong pull towards you like nothing I’ve ever
felt before.  When you ride and feel the wind in your hair, and it makes
you smile?  That is what makes you different from those other girls and I
love that about you.  You’re just like me.  The trees, the lake, the
horses and the sunsets are all we need.  And each other.  We need
each other.  I need you.  I love you, Amy.”

    I
can’t breathe.  I gasp for air as I wipe the tears from my eyes.  I
can hear the pills rattle in the bottle as my hand shakes.  I pop the top
of the pill bottle and hand him his pain relievers.

    He
tosses them to the back of this throat.  I hand him the glass of water on
the nightstand and watch him as he washes the pills down without taking his
eyes off of mine.  

    A
desperate need suddenly washes over me.  I can see the same need in his
eyes.

I grab the hem of my t-shirt
and lift it slowly over my head.  I’m wearing his favorite sheer black
bra.  He licks his lips as he watches me undress and then climb over him
to straddle his waist.

    I
write the words
I love you too
across his chest with my finger and then
bend down and press a kiss right over his heart.  I can feel it beating
under my lips.

    He
lifts his hips and pushes his pajama pants down past his knees and then grips
my waist pulling me down on him.

    “I
don’t want to hurt you.”  

    “You
won’t.  Just like this.  Just go slow.”

    I
rest my flat palms on the bed on either side of his shoulders, trying to keep my
weight on my knees and then I lower myself over him until he fills me
completely.

    “Oh
God,” we both moan together.

    “You
feel so good Amy.”

    I
try to move slowly over him without hurting his ribs.  I sit up on my
knees and reach behind my back to unclasp my bra and let it fall away, watching
Dillon’s eyes travel over my body.  He’s in pain.  He can’t move and
I can tell he’s struggling.

    “Touch
yourself for me, Amy.”  His words and the look on his face give me
confidence.  There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for him.  I close my
eyes and lightly rub at my nipples with the tips of my fingers until they
stiffen.  That familiar tingling sensation flows through my body and my
hips start to rock against him.  I fondle my breasts, squeezing them and
massaging them and pulling on my nipples, just hard enough to feel a bit of
pain mix with the pleasure.   My core starts throbbing.  I let
one hand drift down my belly to between my legs and I start to slowly rub
circles over the swollen nub that is pulsing with need.  I open my eyes to
see Dillon watching me intently.   

    “Shit,
Amy.  You’re so beautiful.”

    He
looks at me with such intensity in his eyes.  He needs me.  He thinks
I’m beautiful.  He loves me.  Me.

    “Oh
God Dillon.”  A spark of intense emotions charge me.  I start to
bounce on him, panting heavily.  Up and down, up and down, frantically,
trying to satisfy my desperate need to climax.   I bounce on my knees
while squeezing my nipples hard with one hand and rubbing my clit feverishly with
the other.  I throw my head back, biting on my lip to stop myself from
screaming as each and every muscle in my body clenches around Dillon.  

    “Fuck,
I’m gonna come,” Dillon groans.

    “Come
inside me Dillon. I want to feel it.”  My eyes find his just as my name
falls from his lips in a breathless sigh.  His body immediately tenses,
his jaw tightens, his fingers bruise my skin as they dig deeper into my hips.
 

     I
feel him come inside me.  I feel him swell and I feel the warm fluid fill
me as my body hugs his.  I collapse on top of him, every single muscle
completely exhausted.

    “Fuck!”
 He grunts and squirms beneath me.

    Oh
shit!  I forgot.  I was bouncing on him like he was a cushion and his
ribs are cracked.  “Oh God Dillon, I’m so sorry.”  I jump off of him,
bouncing on the mattress and landing beside him.  He hasn’t moved an inch.
 He just lays there in all his glory, the fluffy pillow still pushed
against his side, moaning in agony.  

    “I’m
so sorry,” I whisper, holding my hand over my mouth.

    He
turns his head and looks at me with a crooked grin.  “It was so worth it.
 You’re so worth it.  That was amazing.”  

    “It
was,” I breathe out, still trying to settle down.   We lay breathless
side by side with our heads turned towards each other, our faces inches apart.
 I feel such an intense emotional connection with him.  I have since
I saw him for the first time through the fence.  “I love you,” I whisper.

    “Come
here.”  He holds his arms out for me.

    “Aren’t
you sore?”

    “I’m
okay.”  I crawl into his arms, curling up against his warm body and
breathing him in.  “I love you, too,” he whispers into my hair.
 “Don’t ever think that you don’t belong in my life.  You are meant
to be here with me.”

CHAPTER 24

Amy

    “Amy,
this is Ellen Schafer.”

    I
nod.   I know who she is. Detective Douglas told me about her after
they investigated Alex Schafer.  She’s the wife of Alex Schafer, the fat
man in the suit who owned the land we lived on, the one that brought us the
boxes, my grandfather.  She’s David’s mother. She’s my grandmother.
 She looks old and frail.  Her hair is thin and her face distraught.
 She wears expensive clothes and her perfume smells like flowers.  I
can tell she was a beautiful woman long ago, but she looks worn now.  

    “Ellen
was the one that called me and then warned the police about David coming here.
 She wants you to know the truth,” Ray says, holding my hand as we sit on
the couch facing the stranger that is about to tell me the secrets my mother
kept from me my whole life.

    Dillon
wraps his arm around me so I can lean on him and kisses my temple, letting me
know he’s here for me.

    “Amy,
I don’t know where to start.”  She fidgets with her tissue as she looks around
the room, searching for her words.  “I’m so sorry,” she says, finally
focusing on me as she speaks.  “Your mother came to us when she was just
thirteen years old.  She had drug addicts for parents and ended up living
on the streets, doing anything she could to survive.  She came to us sick.
 She was diagnosed with schizophrenia.  We took her in, hoping we
could give her the help she needed.  We wanted to give her a better life.
 We had her in therapy and taking the proper medications.  She was
doing better for a while, but then her behavior started to change.  We had
no idea what our son was capable of back then.  We just didn’t know what
was happening, Amy.”  She looks down into her lap as tears drip off of her
cheeks.  The look of shame takes over her features.  “We found out
David had been sexually harassing your mother.  Tormenting her.
 Threatening her.  When she was sixteen, he and his high school
buddies took it too far, and locked her up in the basement and…..”  She breaks
down, shaking her head with disgust on her face as she recalls something ugly,
but chooses not to say it out loud.

    Dillon
wraps his arm tighter around me as my shoulders shake and tears flood my eyes.

    “All
those years, we didn’t know.  We thought her behavior was just related to
her past.  When we found out she was pregnant, we confronted David and his
friends and were horrified to hear the details of what they had done.  His
friends were scared and confessed everything.  We knew David was the
father.  We had a doctor friend of ours examine her.  She was broken.
 Her body had been through hell and her mind couldn’t deal with it.
 She was so thin, we were surprised to learn that she was already in her
third trimester and could feel you moving.  She begged us to let her keep
you.  The doctor agreed to treat her pregnancy and her mental illness for
us, so we kept her hidden throughout her pregnancy.  When you were born,
Alex did the only thing he could.  He had to protect his son.  You
have to understand.  He is our son.”  

    Her
voice cracks as she struggles to continue.  “We couldn’t let people ask
questions and find out David raped a mentally ill child and got her pregnant.
 He was to take over the firm for Alex.  It would have ruined all of
us if anyone found out.  So to protect David, Alex had to hide you and
your mother away.  He told her if she ever breathed a word, you would be
taken from her.  That she would never see you again.  I turned my
head and let him do it.  I numbed myself with painkillers and alcohol and
just tried to forget. Alex was a powerful man and I was so scared.  It was
wrong.  I know it was wrong what he did, but he was just trying to protect
his son the best way he could.  He tried to keep you and your mother safe
by hiding you here and providing for you.  He made sure your mother had
her medications.  He made sure you had school books and clothes and that
you were taken care of.  We never told David where you were.  Less
than a year after we moved your mother and you out here, David was accused of
raping another girl.  Alex’s power and money got the case swept under the
rug, but David continued to get into trouble.  Several years ago, Alex
started to get sick. David was helping me take care of Alex, the business and
the estate.   I think he found all of the paperwork on the land that
Alex purchased and that’s how he found you and your mother.  I didn’t know
he had been going to the house until the police started asking questions.
 They questioned him about you and your mother.  They said you
claimed your mother was being abused and threatened by a thin man fitting
David’s description and that you and your mother had been hidden on that land.
 David denied knowing about any of it to the police, but I could tell he
was lying,  I knew then that he had found you and that he had been going
to that house.”

    My
mother was right.  David was her devil and she continued to endure his
torture to protect me from him.

    “I
went to the police with everything.  David will be locked up for a long
time.  He’s sick, Amy.  Your mother?  She was a young girl that
lived through hell and had no one to pull her out.  I’m so sorry I turned
my head.  I should’ve never let them take you and your mother from me, but
I was so scared.”

    “What
do you want from me?  I can’t….I can’t just forget I was hidden from the
world for eighteen years while my mother went crazy and you did nothing.”
 I’m no longer crying.  I’m so angry.  My mother was only
sixteen and had already suffered a horrible past, only to be thrust into a
future full of torture and torment and the only people that could help her
turned their backs.

    “I
have something for you.”  She rifles through her large Coach purse and
pulls out some papers and tries to hand them to me.

    “I
don’t want anything from you.”

    “It’s
already yours.  Alex’s estate meeting was last week.  The day you
turned eighteen, Alex changed his will and left you that land.  You own
that one-hundred acre piece of property.  It’s worth a lot of money now,
Amy.  It could change your life.  When the investigation was dropped,
and I knew you and your mother were out of that house, I thought it was over.
 Then, David found out at Alex’s estate reading that Alex left you that
land.  He was so angry.  When I overheard his conversation with
someone on the phone about heading to a ranch to take care of some business, I
knew he was coming after you.  He wanted that land.”

    She
pulls an envelope from her purse and hands it to Dillon.  “Dillon, he also
left a donation for the ranch in the amount of $500,000.  Ray had
mentioned all of the wonderful things you wanted to do with the ranch.”

    “Holy
shit.”  Dillon hesitantly takes the envelope from her.  “I’m not sure
what to say.”

    She
glances back and forth between me and Dillon.  “I think Alex knew somehow
that the two of you would find each other and this is his way of making things
right.  Amy, I also have your birth certificate and social security card.”

    I
take the papers from her and stare at the eight digit number that is me.
 I have identification.  It’s just a piece of paper, but I’m
overwhelmed.

    She
stands to her feet and uses her tissue to gently blot her eyes and her nose
again and sniffles.  “I loved your mother, Amy.  As if she were my
own daughter.  My hands were tied.  Alex and David were both very
powerful men.  I can’t change the past, but if you’d let me, I’d love to
be a part of your future.  You’re my granddaughter.”  She smiles
weakly.

    I
have no words for her.  It’s too much to process. I sit on the couch stunned
as Ray walks Ellen out.  I sift through the papers and read my name typed
across the pages of the deed to the property.  My prison.  I own it
now.

    “Amy,
are you okay?” Dillon asks as I lean against him for support.

    “Yeah.”
 It’s all I can manage.    

    “How
are you sweetheart?” Ray asks as he comes back to sit on the other side of me,
resting his hand gently on my knee.

    “I’m
a little overwhelmed.”

    “I
have something else to tell you,” Ray says.  “Dillon’s been asking me
about that property for months and when he told me about seeing you there, I
didn’t put two and two together.  When I got the call from Ellen about her
son coming to the ranch to look for you and that he was dangerous, I couldn’t
believe it.  Alex and I had been friends since high school.  I was
best man at their wedding.  I was there when David was born.  I
started to think back to the few times I visited them in Denver and then I
remembered seeing a young girl there.  Dillon was about two years old.
 Alex was doing some legal work for me when I started publishing.”
 He pauses for a moment to think. “So that was about twenty years ago.
 She was about fourteen?”

    “I
know she was sixteen when I was born so that sounds right.”  My hand flies
to my mouth when I think about what he just said.  “Dillon met my mother?”

    “Yes.
 She actually kept an eye on him while we worked.  She was a sweet
girl, Amy.  She was troubled, but she was a sweet girl.  She just
never got the help she needed.”

    My
eyes tear up and I look up at Dillon.  My mother cared for Dillon before I
was even born.  He saw a glimpse of the young girl that I never got to
see. The young girl that had a troubled past that needed to be saved.  The
young girl that was trying to get better before the devil took her to hell.
 The connection I have with him feels even deeper now somehow, and now
that I know what my mother endured and what she went through to protect me, I
don’t feel angry or resentful toward her like I have all of these years.
 I feel sad.  I feel sad for her.

    “I
want to see my mother.”