Heavenly Lover (6 page)

And he was starting to believe her.

He felt alone and thoroughly worthless.

Claire’s heart ached at the pain in Daniel’s soul. She felt Audray’s bitter heart and saw bloody claws in Daniel’s chest. She’d never seen a man so torn apart by another woman before.

Daniel’s eyes moved again as another dream consumed him.

He stood outside his dining room window in the dark of night, face pressed against the glass, reflecting the orange glow of the fireplace. Claire saw he recognized the blonde, naked on the bench.

“Hairy asshole.” Daniel mumbled. Large hands dripping in black hair kneaded her white flesh. “Get your hands off her—” He said some things in Portuguese. Claire felt the pain in his chest, saw the sweat build up on his upper lip. Daniel’s fingers clutched and crushed leaves from a bush under the window ledge.

“She arches to his touch. She wants him…” The man’s mammoth hands dimpled the delicate white skin with fat probing fingers. Her red lips kissed him, everywhere. Claire swallowed as she saw Audray suckle the strange man’s member between her red lips.

In his sleep, Daniel groaned, and she focused her attention on his sleeping form instead of his dream world. In spite of the dream, Daniel was getting an erection in bed. His arm rubbed his groin above the covers. Claire’s cheeks turned bright red. She brought her attention back to his dream world.

The scene changed. The thick Henkel carving knife was balanced between his fingers. It gleamed in an unearthly patina as he turned it in silence. The blade was capable of effortlessly slicing through flesh. “I won’t have to press hard at all…”  

Claire’s stomach turned as she watched him imagine the cut, dreaming about something that thankfully never occurred. The blood was warm. It spilled over his legs. She was certain every time she looked at that green bench that she would remember both scenes: love and death.
The curse of being human.

“No more nightmares. Peace at last,” he murmured. She knew this was folly, but he was trying to kill off his own passion.

Claire could feel Daniel’s pain as he relived those hollow, sex-filled days. But she also picked up how much he missed the excitement and unpredictability of this woman. Audray was a complete distraction, consuming his thoughts. His desire for Audray came from a place of need, a true addiction. Claire blushed frequently at his thoughts, she did not view his appetite as being healthy. She could not remember a charge being so tormented.

Claire leaned over and laid her hand over his forehead and eyes, not quite touching. Warmth radiated up to her fingertips. She rubbed her thumb back and forth over her first two fingers, producing sparkles of dust, which fell to his face and on his closed eyes. He succumbed to a dreamless, deep sleep.

She smiled at the sight of his uncovered chest. She held her hand above it, feeling the warmth, and moved closer, looking at the delicate black hairs leading down below his waist. His pajama bottoms had slid low, revealing a flat stomach with two delicious veins extending below. Her hands warmed and her fingers tingled. This was a new sensation, this tiny charge of electricity passing from his massive upper torso and traveling up her arms. He smiled, as though responding to her gaze, which caught her breath up short. The smile faded.

Claire laid her head on the pillow next to him to wait for other signs of a dream, but doubted it would be tonight. Next time, she would try to give him some color, something other than the vision of his own blood or the blonde he could no longer have.

It would be morning in a couple of hours. She stretched her arms and legs, just inches from his sleeping frame. His breath in her face was delicious. She was glad she never slept. This meant she had at least two, maybe three, hours of this Heaven on earth before Daniel’s normal routine took over.

Claire searched her feelings. Her desire to heal him remained strong and true. She knew she could do it, even with all the dark dreams. It was his passion she wasn’t sure about. Although it was uncharted waters, and perhaps a bit dangerous, her confidence lifted her.

Her search for adventure lifted her higher still.

When sunlight first began pouring into the window over Daniel’s bed, Claire watched Daniel pull the sheet over his head to protect his eyes. At last, she felt him surface and become fully conscious.

Claire held her breath as he sauntered to the bathroom and dropped his silk pajama bottoms. His smooth bottom was slightly whiter than his muscular thighs. His back rippled with definition she had never seen before on a man. An urge to run her hand over those smooth cheeks and press herself into his bronzed shoulders left her no choice but to get up and follow her eyes. She stood barely an inch behind him to see if she could feel the warmth of his flesh, and found she could. The nipples of her breasts twisted in little knots under her white gown.

He stepped into the shower, lathering up with that spicy citrus soap he’d used last night. It tweaked her nose, making her sneeze. She leaned against the bathroom wall, doing her deep breathing exercises, but found it difficult to resist the temptation of removing her gown and joining him. She had never experienced such a sensual attraction to a human charge. She was sure she would be breaking so many rules this time around.

Anything of value carries with it great risk.
Father had told her that. There was always danger when she was learning new things about humans.

And it was exactly why she loved being Guardian above all else. Perhaps above the
calling
as Mother described it. It felt more like a pulling, an attraction. An irresistible urge to what?

To be part of something else. To blend…

Daniel swung the shower curtain back so fast her heart jumped. He stood before her, dripping wet. She felt hot angel blood flush to her face. She immediately exited to the bedroom to calm down, listening to the muffled sounds of the fluffy towel do its work. She would have liked to—

Stop it.
She needed to exercise control, but slipped back into the bathroom, sure he was about to perform the ritual of shaving.

He looked into the mirrored cabinet and foamed up his face with fluffy white cream. Claire held her breath in anticipation of what was to follow. She was sometimes guilty of hiding her charge’s electric shavers. The sounds of the razor slowly sweeping over the fresh, menthol-laden surface of his cheeks and chin made her toes curl. She could have swooned.
If he were mine, I would do this for him every morning, and again at night, if he would let me.

Steam came up from the hot water tap. His muscled forearm rippled as he rinsed off the razor once he finished. He tapped it three times against the porcelain edge of the sink.

He stared into the mirror. What did he see? Could he know she was standing behind him, that a droplet of the Mediterranean lime aftershave he used landed on her gown as he patted his cheeks? The moist air was as fragrant as any of the flower gardens in Heaven. The vision of his towel-clad body every bit as beautiful as the roses she picked. After drying his hands, he went to the bedroom. She buried her face in his towel and filled her lungs with his scent.

If he were mine, I would wrap myself in this towel and wear it all day.

What am I saying?
Her friends would laugh at her if they knew this.
But wouldn’t it be nice?

He dressed, then she followed him down to the kitchen where he poured himself some cold cereal and made coffee. Claire sat across the table, chin in hand, and elbow resting on the wooden surface. He bore no resemblance to the man she first met last night, like the journey she’d been on in his dreams had never taken place. She was pleased her healing hand had washed his soul.

He was rushing, checking his watch and hurrying out the door. He never looked once at the remnants of the destruction in the living room. Claire decided she would use the day to explore, mingle with humans in human form. She would go to the café she saw in the picture, or maybe to the gallery to see his paintings.

The instant Daniel left, Claire pulled herself out of her invisibility and walked in human form down the hallway leading from his bedroom, which was still filled with Daniel’s scent. She tore herself away, ascending the stairs to the attic, her yellow transport bag in tow. She could have willed herself up there, but loved hearing that delicious creak of the door as she pressed it open. She climbed the narrow stairwell like a human woman seeking a new adventure. It reminded her of secret rooms she had read about in castles in Europe.

The attic was tall at the roof’s ridge, but both sides sloped to a dormer and window. The little window she had seen from the street last night had an old wooden chair beside it, as if someone used to sit and watch who came and went. The place was dusty, but on the windowsill there was a fine layer of sparkling dust, like some gentle hand had pressed the glass, waiting for a glimpse of someone coming home.

Or, maybe that was just the story she told herself. Like one of her novels.

She touched the dust. It was from a long time ago. Had another angel sat there? Had she waited for her charge to return from his adventures in the human world? Did she succeed? Did she love her job as much as Claire did?

She set her bag next to the worn and scarred dresser in the middle of the room and tugged off her gown. She pulled on a t-shirt, then a hooded sweatshirt, and slipped into blue jeans.

Much better. She almost felt human.

Almost.

Chapter 6

Claire sat under an awning of the outdoor café, watching people hurrying down the sidewalk that shone from the morning rain. Wetness in the air melded with the smell of fresh hot coffee and griddlecakes. Even the smell of wet pavement was pleasant.
I will miss this when I return.
It never rained in Heaven; it misted.

She tapped her nails against the green and white-checkered plastic cloth that covered the little table as she searched the crowd for a familiar face from one of her previous missions. It could happen. But no, not today.

She felt alone in spite of the people surrounding her. She dipped her tongue into the soft whipped cream piled atop the steaming chocolate drink warming her hands. It was considered dangerous for angels to taste things, as that could lead to eating, which could eliminate an angel’s powers of invisibility. Yielding to temptation made angels visible. It wasn’t forbidden, just not advised. Eating was an aphrodisiac—at least, the way many humans ate was. The hunger inside them had nothing to do with their stomachs. This was a dangerous experience for an angel and could lead to a fall from grace.

But the scent of warm chocolate was one of her all-time favorites. Ignoring the danger and repeated warnings, she savored the way the sweetness caressed her tongue.

“That is just one of the sexiest things on the planet.” Josh had slipped in so quickly she hadn’t seen him.

Startled, Claire jolted, spilling a little of the warm mixture. She felt trapped in her human form, but remained seated and set the messy mug down. A small dollop of the whipped cream stuck to the tip of her nose. She reached up to dust it off but Josh stopped her.

“Ah, love. You’ve messed your face. I can help.” He rubbed it off with his forefinger, then put the tip of his finger in his mouth. His eyes danced with an unearthly fire. “Very sweet, very sweet indeed.”

Claire’s heart pounded so hard surely Josh could hear it. Bound by the rules, she couldn’t just disappear without people noticing: she was caught. Josh tilted his head to the side, squinting, as if he enjoyed watching her squirm. She had no choice but to talk to him.

“So now that we’ve met, what lovely name do I call you, or do I get to pick one?” His velvety smooth voice washed over her face and made her ears tingle.

Claire focused on her mug of chocolate, remaining mute.

“You know that when we turn a Guardian, we get to choose their name? Surely they taught you that in school?” The words rolled easily off his tongue.

Claire was confused and Josh saw it. She knew he had something to do with that, that his breath carried with it something that made her feel things…

She became distracted with his mouth…

Keep calm.

So this was something else they hadn’t taught her. Fear began to rise, pressing cool fingers all the way up her spine one vertebrae at a time.

Deep breathing. Keep on your feet.

“No?” he persisted. “I can see they didn’t. But maybe they don’t know.”

“And I’m not turned,” she spat out.

“Ah, lovely. She speaks. The angel talks to me.” Josh consumed her with a warm smile that sent a thin erotic cover over her whole body.

“I said, I am not turned,” Claire insisted, despite the tingle down her spine. The mental erotic caress was not unpleasant, but the circumstances were.

“Not yet, my lovely. Not yet.” Josh’s voice purred. “You’re much prettier than I thought. Most of you are too vanilla. I’m partial to redheads, but you probably already know that, if you’ve snooped in Daniel’s dreams at all.” He leaned into the table, whispering, “How’d you like Audray? Did they have you panting in the middle of the night, hmmm?”

“I’ve seen it before.”

“Of course you have,” Josh said. He straightened up and chuckled. “You guys never get in the game. Human life is just a spectator sport—something you can go home and gossip about with your friends.”

“I don’t share your cynical view of human life. Didn’t they teach that to you in the Underworld School For Bad Boys?”

Josh’s eyes widened. Three deep forehead creases appeared. He tilted in a subtle bow. “Very good, little one. I like the fire and spirit in you. So then, tell me your name.”

“Claire.”

“Nice. I like it. I think you can keep it, for now.”

“How did you find me?” Claire curtly asked, ignoring his implication.

“Hard to miss the big yellow taxi with the only redheaded cabbie I know.”

This annoyed her. She felt vulnerable being so easily spotted by this dark angel. “What do you want?” Claire knew it was impossible to mask her fear. She didn’t think he could read her mind, but knew he felt her fear.

“You.” He smiled. His eyes became translucent and she could see traces of red light coming through again. Claire looked down to avoid his eyes, unsure of his powers. Josh reached across the little table and raised her chin with his thumb and forefinger, causing a warmth that blotched the skin at her chest. “Now, now. I’m not here to hurt you. There’ll not be a scene. I’m curious about you.” He smiled and released her.

Claire wasn’t used to the mixture of emotions. Her pulse quickened. No doubt he observed this. Her frustration was tinged with a bit of anger that she worked to stuff down. She could see how Josh had manipulated Daniel so skillfully. Appearing as friend when he actually was the enemy.

Feeling unprotected being alone with him, she was grateful for the surrounding crowd. After considering all her choices, she thought it best to let him deliver his communication, anticipating it would be some kind of threat. Then he might leave her alone.

“May I?” Josh pointed to the hot chocolate. “I mean, I know you girls don’t drink or eat.” His knowledge of angels both impressed and frightened her. Her insides were scrambled.

“Help yourself.” She barely got the words out. But at least her voice didn’t waver.

He leaned back in his chair, inhaling through his teeth in a kind of reverse whistle. “Don’t
ever
tell me that, Love, if you know what’s good for you.” He smiled, and shaking his head, he leaned forward for the warm mug of chocolate. He sucked in the whipped cream off the top loudly, leaving a white moustache on his dark and handsome face.

Claire wanted to look away, but something held her gaze as she watched him remove the whipped cream from his upper lip with his tongue. He dabbed his mouth with a napkin and waved his eyebrows up and down, playing with her.

“I saw you thinking about tasting it. You’re not supposed to, but you want to drink and taste, don’t you?” He looked with that tilt of the head again that would seem so innocent on someone not so devious.

I should have known better, been more careful. Why couldn’t I sense him before?

“Do you think He would mind if you just had one little taste?” He pointed to the heavens and shrugged. “I don’t think so.” He held out the mug. It was still steaming, and the rich chocolate fragrance filled her head.

Claire steeled herself. She would need to overcome her emotions. Time to show him what she was made of. She’d resist, even if he liked it. Sounding more determined than she felt, she said, “I have no interest in what you think. I don’t care anything about you. I want you to leave me alone.”

“Ah, yes. Well there is that, too,” he said as he raised his eyebrows and smirked at the subtle rebuke. Holding the mug to his lips, he paused. “I admit. I am an acquired taste.” His face jerked back after taking a sip. “Ow, too hot, even for me.” He blew over the top of the drink with enough force to push back the hairs at the sides of her face.

The effect of his breath on Claire’s face startled her. Her eyelids became heavy and she released her composure, relaxing into the fear. She became dizzy and aglow with sensuality, as though drugged. For a brief second, looking into the dark eyes across from her, she could feel a pull towards him. She wondered in a flash what it would feel like to kiss those smiling lips and feel their power on her body.

It wore off just as fast as it came on. Josh toasted her with the mug.

“That was a beautiful thing to watch,” he said as he winked. He didn’t mask his arousal.

Claire was losing the battle and needed escape to safety. She was not used to being outmatched, so she leaned forward on one elbow, chin perched on her upturned hand. Under the table she rubbed her thumb against her first two fingers, filling her other palm with dust. She motioned with forefinger for him to bring his face closer to hers.

Eagerly, he leaned into her, elbows matching and almost touching hers, chin resting on his fingers. Josh’s face was only a foot away from hers. He spread that affable Cheshire cat smile. He smelled of cinnamon and cardamom, and she heard deep organ music.

She inhaled deeply, and in one long movement, brought her other hand up to her chin, then slowly opened her palm full of dust and blew it in his face. His eyes widened initially as he appeared temporarily immobilized. Fear brushed across his face for one brief second. At last, he recovered with a sigh. Then he sat up straight.

“You’re very good,” he said at last.

“You’re very bad.” She gave a tight smile in return. She was hoping her shaking didn’t show. No sense to stay to do battle all day. So she stood. “I’m leaving.”

“Yes, you are.” He rose slowly to his feet, appearing enchanted. “It has been a pleasure, Claire.” He made a hint of a bow in her direction.

“I’m not going to play this game with you. We aren’t friends and we have nothing in common.”

“Is that a challenge I hear?”

“This is
not
happening,” she replied, putting on her jacket.

“Oh, but it already has begun, my dear.”

“Well, perhaps in your mind. It’s something else entirely to me.” She turned to leave. He grasped her forearm over the jacket sleeve firmly, showing his need to touch her, pulling her toward his chest as he inhaled her scent.

“Tell me what it is for you,” he murmured.

She saw a flash of something in his eyes—need? Emptiness? Something had shifted. She didn’t know what, but she’d seen something Josh wanted to remain hidden.

Claire held her breath to ward off the effects of his power at this close distance, and then blurted out, “You’ll never know.” She yanked her arm from his grip. Knowing he expected his seductiveness to work on her, she added, “I can say this: I saw a lot of wet, slimy frogs and snakes. I saw mushrooms and rotting leaves. I was chilled to the bone. You
do
have
that
effect on me.”

It was a complete lie, of course. Her heart was racing. Her eyes felt like they were going to burst into the tears she stubbornly would not give him the satisfaction of seeing. She wanted to run, but turned and walked out into the street.

Claire didn’t look back at him as she walked away, feeling the warm sun on her face. This was the best she could muster today. She needed help. Now she understood how dangerous Josh was and how he’d gotten his hooks into Daniel. Claire was worried, for both of them. Josh made it clear he’d shifted his sights to her. She needed someone else’s advice, immediately.

If I’m not careful, Josh will have a twofer.