Haze of Dusk (A trilogy) (28 page)

“
I miss you old man.” I whisper looking at the sunset. White doves fly high in the air in a strange pattern. A clash inside my bedroom draws my attention. I go back in; on top of my bed is a white box, alone like my heart. I gaze all ways, questioning its arrival. I carefully open the box. Inside there’s a long white gown, with pearl jewelry. I frown. Who can possibly gift me? I grasp the dress letting my skin feel its softness. The fresh-new material aroma is nice yet familiar. I’ve never worn something so luxurious and beautiful. It would be delightful. It hits me, I scoff. I remember this familiar scent; it’s Vaniele who gifts me. I can’t have anything that woman sends me. I close the box, rush to the balcony and toss it down the ocean, but the box flies back to me. I frown, and view around. Perhaps, she is doing it purposely, but I don't see her in her balcony.

“What
is this?” A letter glides to me. I swipe it before the wind takes it,

“
To my mushkin…”

I
breathe heavily, for there’s only one person who’s ever called me mushkin.

“It once belonged to your mother. Take care of it,”

I gasp. Could it be Papa gave it to someone to one day give to me? But who could’ve been keeping it for so long? I bite my lips. Although angry at Papa, I can’t help but still love him, and miss him dearly. I go inside, changing my mind in how to spend the day that might be my last.

The flawless white gown tightens in my body creating curves I didn’t think I
have. The bottom is long with flakes, yet two slits expose my legs. I brush my hair to the side, forming natural perfect waves. A bit of lip color and I’m done. I intently look at my reflection. I'm astounded with my good looks. For the first time in a while I don’t feel just pretty, but attractive.  

The ball is bein
g held in the castle’s ballroom. A large place with glinting walls, large chandeliers, and a triangle-design polished floor. The music is noisy, and cheerful. I can hear the strings of the fiddle combine with the serene flows of the clavichord, and earsplitting hand-drums. I step a foot inside. The room is congested with people I barely recognize. The deeper I walk in, the faster people notice me, staring and pronouncing my name. They all know me well— they stare with awe. I frown. Why are they staring? Is my dress too tight?  I rub my hands together, and look around the room. I don’t see anyone familiar.
I knew this be a bad idea.

“Dance with me,” hands slide on my waist from
my behind. I gasp, and jostle myself away from the man. I rest a hand on my chest, relief by who took me by surprise. “You scared me, you awful person!” Corr beautifully smiles. This man is truly handsome. He wears a white tasteful outfit, with a tad of navy blue, a lot like his personality. “I would love to dance with you.” I whisper. He smoothly takes my hand and kisses it. The music slows down, now it’s much easier to dance, still, too romantic. Corr and I dance, smiling at one another. I’m dreamy in his hands. I care for him, but the feelings don’t compare to what I feel for Khysso, it can never.

“Why is eve
ryone looking at us?” We’re surrounded by people that can’t remove their eyes from us. “Have you not looked at yourself? You are indeed the most beautiful. Judyala, you are the perfect woman.” I flush to his words. He stares profoundly at my face, his eyes glimmering. “I thought you weren’t coming.” He says as we dance. I bow down my head. “I…I thought so too…but I changed my mind. I realize, I want to spend this day with my friends,” the corner of his lip rise.

“Good, because
I missed you,” he whispers, caressing my cheek. There is tension. I undergo suffocation, luckily a nimble person comes our way, thrusting him, and stealing me from Corr. “Madam, dance with me?” He deepens his voice. I giggle at his silliness. “We
are
dancing. And Corr is going to kill you later for pushing him.” Corr gawks at us. Near him are the others, even Ikumus.
What a surprise.

“I know, but who cares.” Ramuso dances me all over the room. He's to hyper for me. He twirls me so many times I easily become dizzy.

I halt my swiveling,
for my head goes in loops. Straight from my sight, I catch a familiar face. I shake my head, assuring my eyes are seeing correctly. He walks around the ball. He’s not joining us, more like guarding. My feet automatically move forward. He draws me. My body wants him—he takes my breath away. I’m in need of him.
Oh goodness.
I press a hand on my chest. My racing heart tells me… I’m head over heels for Khysso.

Gentle hands take me from my hips, pulling me away from the reach of Khysso. I gasp. Corr holds me closely. “Can we continue,” I
glimpse back at Khysso, but he’s no longer there. Again, he leaves me. I miserably nod, sad by his depart.

Corr
takes my hand and intimately we dance. He presses his body with mine. I’m uncomfortable with the closeness of our body, and by his still eyes that don’t leave my eyes. Usually, his touch flushes me, but because of Khysso, I no longer care. I don’t care about anything. Not even the fact Casandree and Khysso maintain a relationship. I, Judyala Zayras, want Khysso entirely, for I too like every other girl in this castle, am a victim. I have fallen for his trap.

“You are beautiful,
Judyala.  I am glad to be the one to be with you here tonight.” Corr utters as the music fades. He strokes my cheek. I partly smile. I wish I can feel the same. A piercing in my stomach boils me intensely. My surrounding briskly goes in circle, and it's not Ramuso’s fault this time. My head flashes uneasily— so many red flickering lights. Corr holds me from my shoulder so I won’t lose stability. “Are you alright?” My breathing quickens. There are flashes in my head... It’s his face I see.
Something is not right.

“I-I have to go to the wash-
room.” I hurry away holding my burning stomach. I can see how my body consumes a painful heat that brings out the sweat in me. The heat I guzzle down is different from what I feel when with Khysso, this heat is deadly. I follow my senses. My body guides me to the swan garden labyrinth, following a path I’ve never gone upon. My stomach thumps harder, and I almost fall down, but I hold the bushes. Another annoying spark in my head reveals blood. I manage to stand, and drag myself to where my awareness directs me too.

“LEAVE!” a loud growl tells me I’m close to my destination. I can hear panting. His tone is not human.  I finally leave the hedgerow, revealing
the edge of the land, the sea, and a couple. I spot Khysso in the absolute darkness, near him is Casandree. My heart breaks to see them again together, and alone. The ache diminishes, but my heart hurts. I can’t face another of their love affairs.

  “Khysso
, you have to learn how to control it. You are also human. You can’t let spellbound do this to you. Please just... forget her please. I'll make you happy. I love you!” her plea stops me from leaving. I need to listen more, so I can understand. Casandree knows his secret, but when…and why is she pleading? “I can’t love you. I can’t love anyone. Don’t you understand…it’s spellbound…” he growls, walking closer to her. I fully capture him now. The light of the half-moon gives him away. Khysso is slowly transforming into an arclaw. I can tell he’s suffering. He’s trying to prevent it. “Leave, before it happens, leave!” he shouts.

“Then let it happen. I can’t do this anymore. I have tried so hard for your heart to be mine.
It’s been a year…why not me? Why spellbound is not with me? I do not care anymore. Kill me…I don’t care,” she sobs. Tears rush down her eyes. I stare breathless. What is she saying? She’s already his…could it be I’m wrong?

Khysso’s muscles grow breaking his shirt. The transformation is whole. He roars, losing control. That night
, when Corr and I heard the howling… could it be it was him.  Khysso rushes to Casandree. He lifts his claws about to attack her, yet, she does nothing but awaits it.
“NOO!” I scream with heavy breaths. Khysso’s eyes move to me. He snarls. But suddenly his expression changes, and gradually the fury calms—the snarling halts. Bit by bit his quick breathing decreases. It’s true, he can’t control his body, but I can help him, but why? Is it because together our magic can break nature’s magic law? My body pushes itself to him. He too strolls towards me, our eyes intensely meeting. The reptile pupil vanishes. We stand near— I can feel his delightful breath on me. His arclaw face disappears, and I confront his attractive human figure. I smile in relief,

“
Khy—” I’m saying but he unexpectedly snatches my wrist, and tugs me to him. He wraps his hands around my waist, pressing his hard body against mine. His skin melts me entirely. I'm powerless to his touch. I slide my hands around his waist, returning the embrace.

From the corner of my eyes, I
see Casandree observing us. Her heartbreaking tears force me to lift my head from him, but it’s too late. She rushes away, swiftly fading from our eyesight. “You saved me, again. You stopped me from killing,” he whispers holding me tightly. I slightly pull away from him to view his eyes, I press my hands on his chest. “Again…” I say lightly.  He looks down at the grass, avoiding my eyes. “You were in your brother’s body when you found me. Casandree followed me when the arclaw in me yearn to free itself. I attacked her. My intentions were deadly… if it wasn’t because of your appearance…I… I would’ve killed her.” I gasp stunned by his confession. That day when I found them—they weren’t doing that dirty-thing. He was…oh goodness. “You and Casandree are not…romantically involved?” I say bluntly. He lifts an eyebrow. He looks affected by my doubts. He groans and picks up his coat from the ground.

“You still do not get it
, do you?” He puts on his coat. I shake my head, get what? “Why don't you go back to your boyfriend Zayras?” I grimace.
He thinks…

“No! Corr is not my boyfriend!” he overlooks my
assertion and walks back to the labyrinth to get to the other side. I follow him. “Khysso, what don’t I get? Tell me. Why can you control yourself with me?” I’m screaming behind him, but Khysso pays no mind and hurries away from me. I lose his figure, and I remain in a dark, isolated corner. I’m puzzled by the many paths.

“No, Khysso don’t leave me alone!” I
cry. I look all my directions. I’m afraid of the labyrinth, for it blocks magic. It’s impossible to find a way out. “Khysso!” I yell. My heart accelerates. I'm left alone in the frightening maze.

“What!” a voice comes from behind.

“Your back,”
I breathe out. He chuckles.

“
How did you cross the maze earlier without getting lost?”

“I don’t know.
I felt a weird pain and I was guided to you.” He stares strictly, showing very little emotion as typical. “Come, I’ll take you back.”

“
No!”

“
What do you mean?”

“I…I want to know what’s going on. I want to know why y
ou can control yourself with me?  I… want to know why you circled me? Why you’ve been so aggressive lately. I want you to tell me what is I
don’t
understand because…I really don’t know.”  I express candid. My cheeks burn on fire, at last I speak my mind.

“What’s with the million questions? Why
is this so important to you?” He stands close to me. His breathing tickles my face. I take a few steps back, trying to apart from him, but he gets nearer and I hit the hedge. There’s nowhere to go.

“I…I just want to know,” I voiced.

“What is that you want to hear , Zayras? That since I met you my body believes it needs you, consequently, when I see you with another I consume anger. That every time I see you with that
damn
chap my heart beats faster, and I want to kill him. That I can’t take being without you, and that it infuriates me that you allow that
bastard
to touch you. And when anger provokes me, I turn into a monster—a beast that reminds me that
you
belong to me. Is that what you want to hear, is it?” He grinds his teeth. I try gulping down air, but I struggle. His confession is strong. Yet, he said everything I wanted and needed to hear. He feels me, all this time, he has felt me.

“Now do you get it…” he
says through his teeth, placing his hand on my neck. His touch disturbs my breathing. There is no control, I’m motionless—heat consumes me again.
“W-what is it you do to me? Why do you consume my body with heat? What type of enchanting spell have you hexed me with?” I’m disgusted by my desirous thought. He quietly laughs.

“
I do nothing to you. That’s your desires, your needs…” he moves closer, his lips brushing my ears, our closeness causing more craving. “That’s your need to have me,” his breath prickles my face. His words take my breath away.
Yes, he’s right, because right now I want him so bad.
Khysso’s lips brush my cheeks, transporting a strict distraction. I fall into a dream, inwardly I beg for his lips to meet mine.

“
You’re beautiful, Zayras. The kindest hearted, most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.” He speaks perfect words that vibrate my knees and make me delusional to his touch. His fingers now fondle my lips. 

“Your
lips…I want it badly…”
then take it, take my damn lips.

“Your skin is
… perfect,” he continues fondling my cheek.
Please just kiss me, I beg you, kiss me.
He presses his lips on my ear over-flaming my breath. An outstanding, unavoidable fire wrinkles my skin. I’m weak— I can’t fight him. I don’t want to fight him. I’m overcome by him.