Read Grasping For Freedom Online
Authors: Debra Kayn
Tags: #MC alpha bikers, #dominating hero, #Motorcycle Club romance, #Biker Romance book, #motorcycle club sex, #Possessive Hero, #sons of anarchy, #bad boy hero, #controlling hero, #outlaw motorcycle club
As he pulled into the parking lot of Cactus Cove, his timing perfect, he spotted Brandy halfway to her cabin. Bypassing his normal parking spot, he rode to the back and cut her off in front of her porch.
Brandy slung her purse over her shoulder, and stood in front of him taking him all in. He cut the engine and put the kickstand down, but stayed on the motorcycle.
Her chest rose and fell, and she sucked in her breath and caught her lower lip between her teeth. His balls tightened in pleasure. For the first time, she appeared vulnerable and indecisive to him. He enjoyed knowing he had that effect on her.
He moved off the bike, gathered her hand, and strode to the cabin with her. When she stalled, holding the key, he unlocked the door for her. He'd given her a couple of hours to think about what was going to happen, to change her mind, to leave Bantorus land. She'd made her decision.
Inside, she dropped her purse and curled into hm. Her arms went around him in a hug. Taken aback, he waited and tried to slow his racing heart. This tenderness, this move, this change in what he expected to happen set him back.
Instead of lifting her face to kiss him, she laid her cheek against his chest. He sank his hands into her hair, surprised to find them shaking. He was used to women stripping off their clothes, tearing off his, or falling to their knees to blow him off.
What he expected to happen between them wasn't happening. He gazed down at the top of her head. He had no idea what she was doing to him.
Sweat broke out on his forehead. His cock pulsed pleasurably, and yet he made no move to go forward and take her on the floor. For some reason, he wanted to remain right here, doing nothing.
No one had ever held him before that he could remember. Awkward and foreign to him, he tried to figure out why a hug brought him a sense of security when he usually only found himself wanting to push the boundaries and take everything he could from a woman wanting to have sex with him. He came up empty. Therefore, he stood there and did nothing.
B
randy's whole body vibrated. Between the hyperaware condition Torque had left her in at the bar and worrying about when Radiant would contact her, she warred with what to do now that Torque was here.
Fear settled around her.
Fear of being yanked away from Cactus Cove without any warning, any chance to see Torque again, any hope of finding her dad. All day, surrounded by bikers, dealing with the threat of Los Li and at the mercy of Radiant's command, she clung to the one person who told her to stay away from him.
She was insane.
Insane, because there was no doubt in her mind that she'd have sex with him. From the moment he stared at her across the parking lot on her first day working, something about him reinforced her opinion that he was the only one she could trust.
She trembled against the solid wall of biker in front of her, soaking in his warmth.
Her hormones bounced up and down, leaving her out of whack. Her self-control knew no boundaries. She wanted Torque, any way she could have him...and the insanity that drove her into his arms scared her.
"Sunshine," Torque said, arching his back while lifting her chin. "What's going on?"
"I want you," she blurted.
Desperate to keep things even between them, at the most basic level, and needing to keep him from asking too many questions, she slid her hands up his chest. Her fingers curled around the edges of his hair brushing his shoulders. Unable to reach his mouth, she tugged on him as she stretched to her tiptoes and kissed him.
She slipped her tongue into his mouth, and his hand circled the back of her neck, through her hair, and pulled her away. He glared down at her. "No."
She opened her mouth to ask him what was wrong, and he kissed her. His tongue stroked hers, taking, and dominating her. The aggression surprised and delighted her. Her body melted into his capable hands. He took away her indecisiveness and allowed her to accept whatever he wanted to do to her without any responsibility.
He held her tight, bending her body to his will. Her breasts pulsed. Her sex dampened. Emotions relaxed her throat, and she hung on to Torque to keep from losing herself. He created a maelstrom of feelings throughout every inch of her that had nothing to do with should she or shouldn't she have sex with him.
She was definitely going to have sex. At this moment, that's all she needed.
Then she was in Torque's arms, her feet off the floor, her head cradled in the palm of his hand. Her muscles warmed and relaxed. The whole time he carried her to the bedroom, he continued kissing her. There was nothing required of her, but to accept what he was doing to her.
He placed her on the bed, followed her down, and lay on top of her. Her legs gave way to his weight and he settled against her sex. At the brush of his body, she frantically reached for him.
He stilled. "No."
She held on to his biceps, lost in what was happening to make his body harden—and not in a good way. She wanted to have sex. He wanted to have sex. She could feel the proof of his arousal between her legs.
"What did I do?" she said, or maybe she only thought the question because he never answered.
He pushed her top up over her breasts, pulled down her bra, and latched on to her nipple. Electric jolts seared her core. His tongue caressed the sensitive bud, alternating between a hard suck and lavishing attention on her. She arched off the bed, needing and wanting more.
Torque's hands moved to her arms, drawing her hands out to the sides, until she posed on the mattress like a sacrificial peace offering. He lifted his head. The coldness of the room brushed her breast where his moist mouth had been, and she trembled as her nipples constricted into a tight bundle of nerves that picked up Torque's warm breath.
"Keep your hands on the bed and don't move." He moved down her body until he stood on the floor.
He pulled off her boots and tossed them to the floor. She watched every move, afraid if she sat up or went to him, he'd stop. Stopping wasn't an option. She wanted him to go faster, but he continued taking his time.
Torque undid her zipper. She shivered. The
trill
of the teeth coming undone reminded her of how Torque used his teeth to rasp over her bottom lip yesterday, and how much she liked when he kissed her without any restraint.
He undid the button on her jeans and tugged. She lifted her hips, and laid back down, bare from the scrunched shirt under her armpits down to the tip of her toes. He held out his hand, pulled her into a sitting position, and finished undressing her. Perfectly capable of removing her clothes herself, the wait tortured her. She was a bundle of nerves, sensitive to every movement, every breath, every look coming from Torque.
She swallowed hard. The thought of him doing what he's doing to her, but on one of the women who stayed a few cabins down from hers constricted her throat. She closed her eyes, hiding from the truth.
"Hey," he whispered huskily, hovering over her. "Look at me."
She nodded slightly and opened her eyes. "Please don't stop?"
His eyes warmed and for the second time, she noticed a shift in his demeanor. She relaxed her hands, letting her fingers straighten. She pushed why she wanted to please him out of her thoughts, and concentrated on what he was doing.
It was a one-night stand.
It was only sex.
It was safer with Torque than in reality.
He removed a condom from the wallet attached to the chain on his belt. She lifted her arm and stroked the flame running over his chest and onto his neck. His muscles tensed, and a low crooning sound came from his throat. She removed her hand and placed it back on the bed. That didn't stop her from looking instead.
Two rough spherical scars marked his left side below his shoulder at the top of his chest. The edges of the injuries stood out red against his tanned skin. She inhaled deeply, because the wounds looked angry and tender. Suddenly, his refusal to let her touch him made sense. He'd been hurt. He wanted to protect his shoulder.
"Eyes on me." He shoved his jeans down.
She snapped her gaze to his face. "You're hurt."
His brows lowered and he studied her. Finally, he said, "About eleven months ago. I'm fine."
"It looks so—"
"It's fine." He pushed her legs farther apart. "Wet and ready."
"God, yes," she whispered.
He put his hardness to the opening of her sex and slid inside of her in one thrust. Her whole body tensed, not in shock, not in discomfort, not in fear. All her crazy, unpredictable feelings multiplied at once carrying her away. She panted, trying to catch her breath over her pulsating body. Her muscles warmed and spasmed, squeezing and rejoicing.
Clutching the worn bedspread underneath her, she braced against the need to grind her pelvis against him. "Oh God, please."
She needed fast, hard, relief. Instead, Torque slowly pulled out of her until he was barely in her wetness. She squirmed, and he sank back inside of her. Her eyelids fluttered and she fought to keep looking at him. She wanted to moan and thrash on the bed, but she remained perfectly still, letting Torque do everything.
"All sunshine and happy," he muttered, thrusting in, pulling out, stroking her from the inside, and setting her body on fire.
Torque controlled the moment. Her nipples constricted and her skin tingled She relied on him to keep going and bring her pleasure. At his mercy, instead of feeling vulnerable, she basked in knowing he'd satisfy her.
That confidence in another person's ability she received from him was better than anything she'd ever experienced. For as long as she could remember, she was the one responsible to keep her parents moving forward. The only one held accountable for the other employees, the customers, the bills. For years, she'd wanted to escape.
Torque lowered his head and took her breast in his mouth. She bit down on her lip, and even trying to stop the moan from coming out of her thrilled her. She greedily participated by giving Torque what he needed, total control. In return, she got more than she would even know to ask for.
No responsibility, no demands, no pressure to perform.
He forced her to only feel, and suspended time. Her worries evaporated, her security was right here on the bed with him, and he had her undivided attention. He'd done the impossible, and she wasn't going to waste what he was giving her.
Torque balanced on one arm and touched her between the legs without missing a stroke with his cock inside of her. She screamed in pleasure, bucking against him. All over, deep inside of her, every single inch, tightened, heated, spiraled.
The perfect pleasure intensified, and she couldn't stop. She dug her heels into the mattress as her body bowed on the bed. Torque continued plunging into her wetness, mumbling something she was past hearing.
Orgasmic spasms rocked her from deep in her lower stomach, her chest, and out to her fingertips. A flood of wonderful swept through her legs.
During her climax, Torque set his own rhythm, frantic and powerful. He kept her body reacting. Each thrust a caress, sending her deeper into herself.
Then he grunted, plunging fully inside of her and holding still. His dark eyes, vulnerable and passionate, soothed her. She shivered, lowering her hips onto the bed. She couldn't look away. For all purposes, she knew nothing about the man between her legs. He was a stranger, a biker, and in his words an asshole.
Torque's fervent emotions came from having sex. She knew that. She wasn't naïve.
But, as she laid there soaking in everything that had happened since they stepped foot into the cabin, she recognized the real Torque behind the gruff words, the leather vest, the hot body, the badass motorcycle. She was seeing a side of Torque that she suspected he kept carefully hidden. Now that he'd shown her that side of him, she wanted to know what caused the haunted fear shining in his eyes.
B
randy gazed up at him with the softest, most beautiful smile. He struggled to catch his breath. He'd wanted power over her and when she gave total control to him without any reservations; he didn't know what to do.
Jesus.
Her attention, her passion, her trust laid in his hands. His heart still raced. He never expected to take her choices away, but she'd handed them over to him like a damn gift.
Torque pushed himself off the bed, took the condom off, and tossed it in the wastebasket by the dresser. He should never have returned to the bar or Brandy.
She nearly killed him when she'd climaxed. He'd never had a woman who came undone and let herself go, with him, because of him, for him.
He'd known all along that she wasn't a bitch. He'd used her, and she didn't deserve a fly by fuck. His chest tightened, and he found himself struggling for a lungful of air. He warned her away, because he was desperate enough to take everything good about her if she stayed.
The room closed in on him. First Slade interrogated him, and then Tori let him know she was concerned about him. He should've known what he was doing. No matter how closed in he became, sex always pitched him the other way.
For the last twenty years, he'd used women, riding, and drink to even life out for him and make him forget the past. They were his medication, his downer on his up days and his uppers on his down days. He looped his belt through the front of his jeans and fastened the buckle. Shit, he had to leave the cabin. No, he
had
to leave Brandy.
A spring on the bed creaked. He stepped toward the opened door and before he could escape, Brandy's hand touched his back. He stopped, his body going into full-blown denial. "Sex, sunshine. That's all it was."
"Yeah," she whispered, dropping her hand. "I know."
Her understanding and sweet voice left him drowning. She was all sunshine and happy for a man living in a dark world.
He forced himself to keep looking forward while he walked to the front door and let himself out. The cool night dried the perspiration on his face, his neck, his arms. He continued walking. He almost wishing Brandy would've yelled or even hit him for how he treated her. The reasons why bothered him more than having sex with her. For the first time, he felt ugly and unfeeling. Something that never bothered him before.