Going Thru Hell (15 page)

Chapter Twenty Four

Mom didn't have a clue. She managed to ignore every question
about her discomfort with Aki. He refused to answer, and Bru tried steering the conversation back to the dreams.

The Valkyrie joined before I could push too far, their loud laughter, jokes, and overall jovial nature managed to do what the others couldn't. Shut me up.

I couldn't take a shit without company. I'd been informed they'd decided, with the escalation by the gods and goddesses, I was too vulnerable to be caught without protection. I couldn't disagree, I sucked at fighting. I preferred to run away. As Mel Gibson's character, Brett, said in
Maverick
, “Run away to live another day.”

I tried to make sense of their need to protect me. I didn't see myself as that important.

My parents turned one large room into something of a game room, lights focusing on the pool tables, air hockey, ping pong tables, video games and one massive HD TV hanging on the wall with every game system available.

“You never let me have
stuff like this,” I frowned.

“They didn't have most of these things
twenty years ago, kiddo.” She patted my shoulder and left.

The Valkyries and I played air hockey, and I won most games. Several games in, I realized I could follow the puck and calculate angles without emotion clouding my thoughts. I didn't care if I won or lost, felt no joy in getting past their defenses.

“How bad is it?” Bru whispered.

“I feel nothing.”

“Damn. I hoped you'd shut me out.”

“No, I do not understand how to achieve such a thing.”

Fear and sadness crossed her features a second before I felt them cross the bond. They soaked my brain, and I fell to my knees, crying out. They weren't mine, but caused a reaction. For the first time in days, I felt something. I wanted to keep feeling, to wonder, to want, anything besides the inner desert.

Aki. His smell surrounded me as he picked me off the floor, rumbling deep in his chest, walking briskly towards our room. Bru tried to follow, but stopped.

He slammed the door behind us, the bond wide open, emotions flooding the slice of soul left, including hope. A tiny shadow of hope.

Aki threw me on the bed, hands on hips, glaring. “How much more will you lose before you understand what you have to do?”

“I don't know what you're talking about.”

He stalked away, hands in his thick hair, growling. “Take me. Take everything I have. Save Riot and yourself.”

I stared. Did he mean what I thought he meant? “No.”

“Yes! Or find someone
you don't mind killing. Regenerate, save yourself. I hate seeing you like this.”

“I can't kill someone. Not to mention, the whole get pregnant thing.”

“Then take me, carry my daughter.”

“What do you mean, your daughter? How could you possibly know if we had a child it would be a girl?” I stood, noticing he tensed as I approached. “Tell me, Aki, how do you know the
gender of a child we would create?”

“It doesn't matter.” He moved away, face a blank slate.

“Yes, it does.” I was so tired of not knowing.

“No, it doesn't. I will give you everything, that is all you need know.”

I punched his gut, followed by an immediate kick to the groin. “I'm sick and fucking tired of secrets, you will tell me,” I screamed in his face, hands up and ready.

Coughing and trying to stand, he glared, “No, I won't. Dang
it, Kylie, that kick hurt.”

“Then you won't be offering yourself in some kind of sexual sacrifice anytime soon.” I fought the urge to kick him again. I left the room, going from a fast walk to a jog through the endless maze of tunnels. Bru's emotions followed, and I accepted them gladly.

“Running away, Kylie?” Anahita's voice filled the tunnel, strong and lethal.

“Since when do you give a damn?” I halted, turned in a slow circle, trying to find her. “What, Annie? Lacking a few immortal ovaries to face me?”

Disembodied laughter echoed. “I see your heated palms, taste the anger you borrow from the powerful Valkyrie. Are they not telling you everything, Kylie?”

“Why do you care?” I thought I detected a slight glimmer at the junction.

“Despite what I must do for survival, I still love you. You are as my own child.”

“What do you really want? I am not going to choose a side, I will do everyth
ing to save Riot.”

“Oh, Kylie, you don't have a talent for puzzles, do you? All the pieces lie before you. Can you not see the whole picture?”

“She is not meant to as of yet, Anahita.” Amun appeared, crushing me in a steel embrace. “Surprise, Braider.”

The world fell away, electricity tickling my skin, beset by dizziness and nausea, I knew what Amun was doing. I only hoped it wasn't the bloody Greeks again.

Chapter Twenty Five

Amun's embrace didn't lessen when we landed in a land filled with pyramids and sand. Overhead two moons shined in the bright sun, pulling on the instincts.

“We're here. Let's see if you can take the entirety of Egyptian gods.” His mouth close to my ear, the familiar spices mixing with hot, cinnamon breath.

“Brushing your teeth with Colgate cinnamon?” The bond with Bru as thin as spider's silk.

“I see you can still borrow emotions. Shall we send her some panic?”

“Remember how it felt to be a puppet in my hands?” He tensed around me. “Ah, I see you do. Shall we try it again, Amun?”

“No, Braider, do not take control. You have very little left and each use of power takes a little more.” Khnum's voice interrupted. “You were given an alternative. Why did you not take it?”

“I will not kill the Be
rserker.”

“Look to the thread you try so hard to ignore.”

“No.”

“We are at an impasse, Creator. I'll use her.”

I knew what he meant. Amun wasn't known for rape, or harming women. He must be in desperate straits. “Why are you all so desperate to use me for your wars?”

“We tire of
the wars. You can stop it.”

“Then go after them, leave Riot and me alone.”

“No. Do as we ask, Riot will be safe, you will live. Insane, perhaps, but alive.”

Khnum stepped forward, putting a hand on Amun's shoulder. “You are still trying to control that which cannot be changed. The wh
eel created this long ago.”

Amun's hold relaxed, enough I could put a hand on his forearm. I filled his immortal body, using him like a puppet. “Let me go.” He obeyed and I stumbled forward three steps before catching myself. The strings to his body caressed my fingertips, a delightful sensation. I wiggled them, laughing at Amun's response.

I concentrated solely on Amun, making him move as I wished. A large body slammed into me, but I put the other hand to the chest, filling another immortal body and lighting it. Goo and slimy bits showered over us, and I giggled. I stood, slipping and sliding on the immortal viscera. Wiping it out of my eyes, I forced Amun to his feet, and walked away. Amun followed in stereotypical zombie fashion.

“I'm guessing nobody else wants to play?” I smiled sweetly at the beautiful faces watching with fear.

We trekked into the desert, until only the two of us stood at the top of a sand dune. I wondered at the beautiful skyline, the moons a force to be reckoned with. I could stay here. Rule and force them to bring Riot to me. Together, my son and I could end their wars. Take the immortal worlds one by one.

Gently, emotions filled my chest, a gift of conscious. I shook myself, drawing a deep breath.

Another thought crossed the gray matter, and I made the swift decision to try. I faced Amun, smiling without warmth into his blank face. I centered myself, body and mind, concentrated. Instead of sending orders through the invisible web of puppet strings, I drew on them. Treated the strings like straws in a glass of cold chocolate milk, sucking the power from Amun with everything I had.

A faint vibration caressed the pad of my index finger. A loud pop
ping sound and I was launched backwards, Amun's power filling every inch of skin. I screamed, tossing some of it back at him. The action severed my hold, and he gave me a look of revulsion and terror before disappearing.

The foreign potential circled slowly around my heart, growling for release. Unsure of exactly what I'd done, I swallowed and tried to tap into it. Bright stars burst before me, electricity danced over skin, the world fell away and the dizziness swallowed me whole.

I landed in the tunnel, my head bouncing off the concrete with a sickening thud. Blackness devoured my sight, Aki's face close to mine, asking questions I couldn't hear.

Chapter Twenty Six

I tasted fire and smoke, automatically rolling towards the cause, knowing Tiamat was the source. I wanted the hold of her razor sharp claws, the leathery skin and heavy heartbeat against my ear.

“Don't move,” Mom's voice whispered, her small hands holding me still.

Even better. I reached for her, grasping a hand and hanging on for dear life. The bond with Bru returned thick and heavy. I felt something warm and wet slide down a cheek. I opened my eyes, the light causing spears of pain. I rolled away, groaning.

“Easy, babygirl. Easy,” Mom crooned as she put a pack on my forehead as I hissed and tried to get away.
“No, no. You have a good sized goose egg.”

“Aki?”

“He's here.”

“Don't leave me, Momma.” The pain
finally relented when I passed out.

The second time I opened my eyes, a soft light from the far corner of the room threw shadows, but I could make out the enormous form of a dragon sleeping at the end of the bed,
and Bru asleep on the chaise lounge in the far corner. Behind me, Aki slept with an arm around my waist, nose buried in my neck. Asleep in the chair by the bed, Mom. Her eyes opened as I watched.

“How are you feeling?” she whispered.

I stared. She nodded once, reached forward and grasped my hand.

“I think you need to know the whole truth. I'm scared to speak of it, to tell you everything. But you have to know in order to save Riot. To save them both.”

“What do you mean?”

Aki tensed at my back, his arm tightening. “She speaks of my role in your life. I'd rather you didn't talk of it. It is what it is.”

“No, she might be able to change it all. Have both.”

“That is not how it works.”

“She has the right to free will, Berserker!”

Mom's yelling woke the other two, Tiamat snorting and Bru jumping high enough to fall out of the chair. Tiamat stretched and Bru moved to Mom's side.

“Aki, time to tell her. Let her hear it all, make her own decisions. She may be able to think of a way to live,” Bru pleaded.

“No, this is my life too and I made my decision long ago.”

“This is her life, and Riot's life.”

Confused, I moved out of Aki's embrace, watching the dragon. She transformed into her human form.

“I found Riot, Kylie. He is alive.”

“Where?” Emotions, from my
shredded soul, blazed to life. Fear, the need to protect Riot, love mixed into a potent combination. The most alive I'd felt in a long time. I stood, daring to stalk the goddess. “Tell me where my son is.”

“You cannot reach him, Braider. He is buried within a realm I had a hard time reaching. To get to him, you will have to give up everything you are.”

“Then so be it.”

“No, Braider, you do not understand. There is much more here than you realize, more than just your son.”

“Don't tell her,” Aki demanded. I glanced at him, surprised at the pleading expression. Tears shone over the ice blue irises, glowing bright. He looked ghostly in the weird light, the bear flickering over his form like a bad movie.

“Why? Why do you not want me to save Riot?”

“Because I want my daughter to have a chance at life.”

I blinked, unable to form a response.

“Tell her, Berserker. Rein in your bear, and tell her the story.” Tiamat whispered in the silence.

“I can't,” he threw off the duvet, stalking out of the room.

“Tell me what is happening, Brunhilde. You know the story better than any other,” I begged, sitting on the bed.

She crawled across the bed, sleek and graceful. Settling against the headboard, she grabbed my shoulders, pulling me into her chest, one arm wrapped around my shoulders. “Aki has loved you for centuries, Kylie. We knew you were coming, long before your ancestors were born. It is a curse of immortals, to know things and have to wait for their fruition.”

As she paused, Mom joined her, readjusted my body until I was surrounded by feminine warmth and comfort. I relaxed, waited.

“Remember we spoke of the old crone? We didn't tell you the whole truth in Nashville. She told Aki a story, his part in the future and your life. Aki was a revered Be
rserker, part of the special ops team for a long dead Norse king. Chosen specifically by Odin, whose wife, Frigga, said he would father a child worthy of Asgardian ascent. I met him as a mortal, my father's betrayal still a bleeding wound. Anyway, the crone told Aki of the elixir for immortality, hidden in Frigga's lodge. She told him he would steal and drink, hold the power it contained for you. You see, Kylie, she foretold Aki of you, of your choices. He's always known of your fertility, your ability to take power from others for your own use. He was told that a time would come, when you are backed into a corner, when his soul and immortality would be drank by you, to help you change events which loom on the horizon. By giving himself to you, he saves Riot and the daughter you were foretold to bear. These two children will be demi-gods, with your ability. They are said to bring peace to the gods and goddesses. And in doing so, save humans from a loss so great as to be their undoing.”

Tiamat gracefully sat on the bed, one slim hand on my calf. “These are possible events, Kylie. You still retain freedom of will and choice.”

“What choice? Myself or my children? There is no choice. There is only the ones better than me.” Fighting not to spill the tears, I swiped one hand across my lids. “How do they know Frigga wasn't exclusively speaking of Riot? He is Modi's son. I don't have to take Aki. I cannot kill him.”

“He is allowed to decide what he wants to do as well, Kylie,” Mom chimed in.

“How could he have loved me this long? We only met a few months ago,” I gave Bru an expectant look. “Was he foretold to do that? The expectation leading to an emotion that isn't truly there?”

“No, Kylie. The crone gave a very apt, thorough description. Where and when of your birth, your dark blue eyes, brunette, curly hair, everything. Your personality, the trials suffered before finding you. She said by the time you sought me out, part of your soul would have been sacrificed for those you love.” Bru looked at Mom before turning back to me. “That you will carry Aki's only child. You carry his hopes, dreams and future.”

I wiggled out of their embrace, awkwardly crawling off the bed. I faced them, arms crossed, “So I really don't have free will. He's already decided I will do all of this for him.”

“It is not like that. You asked, and you have more information. The future is always malleable.” Tiamat's black eyes filled with golden sparks.

“Apparently not. Everyone thinks I should kill Aki and bear a child, change the past. For what? Insanity? What past am I to change? Anyone want to answer?”

“That is not known.”

“Of course not.” I left the room, slamming hard into Aki's muscled frame with a loud
oomph
.

“Whoa. Easy. I didn't want to tell you for the very reasons you are running from the room.” His eyes, always beautiful to me, didn't waver.

“You expect me to … to ...”

“No, I
hoped
you would. But I wanted you to do it on your own, not with foreknowledge of such things.” He hugged me tightly, one hand gently rubbing my back, the other holding my head to his chest.

“I cannot kill you, Aki. I would take everything. Hell, I don't even need intercourse to do it.”

“What do you mean?”

“Amun. I had control of him, and sucked his
power through the threads. It’s how I returned.”

“Bollocks. The more you lose, the more powerful you grow.”

“The less conscious I have, the more I am willing to explore the less savory aspects of the ability.” I shuddered. The explosion of feelings earlier ebbed, leaving me to wonder how I could use all of it against them, save Riot and myself. Many ideas showed themselves, none ethical.

“Keep those feelings, Kylie. Think of Riot, anything, to do it.”

“I'm tired.”

He rocked a little, “I know.”

Time slipped past, the embrace relaxing tense muscles from months of responding to his touch. He’d trained me well. The sounds of others walking by barely created a blip on my radar.

“Come, they have left us alone. Let's see if I can bring forth a few more emotions.”

I frowned at the words, but said nothing as he led me inside.

His gaze never left my face as he slowly removed the camisole and pajama bottoms, setting me on the bed. He stood, stripping off his own clothes, standing before me, breathtaking. Not overly broad, tall, muscled without too much. Several scars crossed his chest and thighs, silvery in the gentle light.

“I'm not taking you tonight, Aki.” I had to clarify. I needed to take him ninety different ways, over several years. To taste every inch, over and over. But instinct stated if we ever fully consummated the relationship, it would be only once.

“I know.” He crawled over me, our bodies mere inches apart. I shook, waiting. He kissed me, gentle at first. A groan was lost in the vast emptiness of the room, I tried to pull him closer, but couldn't overcome his resistance. “No, Kylie, let me do this.” He settled between my thighs, his height keeping us from the most intimate of contact. His hands slid up my waist, and arms, pinning them above my head with one hand. The other tried to hold my hips still, yet I fought, rolling
against him, begging.

His free hand pushed into my hair, to the base of my skull. In one quick movement, he grabbed a handful and pulled. My head kicked back and a strange new instinct took over. I fell limp, surrender
ing.

“That's it, Braider. Give yourself to me,” he whispered as his mouth suckled gently on my neck, moving lower. He released my wrists, but I was powerless to lower them. The hold on my head kept me still, I trusted him to be in charge.

The free hand plumped and squeezed my breast, using his tongue against the nipples to tease. Emotions swirled, foaming and cascading over me in wave after wave. The more aroused I became, the deeper I drowned in eaves of sensations.

Releasing my breast, his hand slid down my side, to my waist. He lifted enough to put his palm over my core, and I moaned from the contact. His hips pumped against the mattress, forcing a greater response. As my arousal hit a feverish pitch, I started to break his hold, rocking against his hand, begging for release.

Aggression clouded my mind and I bucked against him. He pressed the heel of his palm against me, rubbing in a slow circle.

Waves of pleasure radiated from my core, and I screamed. I heard him whisper, “That's it, let it roll over you.” He didn't stop, his hips thrusting, his hand wringing more orgasms. His body tensed over mine, a groan echoing from his chest, the roar of a bear filling the room as he buried his lower body into the duvet.

I collapsed, boneless
,
as he shifted slightly to the side, our panting filling the air. My heart thundered as satisfaction plastered a smile on my face. I said the first thing in my slowly rebooting brain, “How much of a mess did we make?”

His chest vibrated against my breast and side as he chuckled. “I'm afraid a fairly big one.”

“Thank you.”

“I thought it might help.”

“I'll sleep well, a
nd save on the cost of Duracell.”

His whole body shook as he laughed, rolling away. Enchanted, I watched his entire expression change, the normally square and almost too harsh planes softened, his expression bright. I ran a finger along his jaw, wanting to make him laugh more often. I'd only been the cause of a few frown lines and a lot of gray hair.

“Let's clean up, change the sheets and sleep.” He stood, offering a hand to help me out of bed.

I gazed down the length of my body, the bright pink scars across my torso and thigh, the odd shape of my breast, the stretch marks shining, the thick, ropy, cesarean scar pucke
red as it ran from navel to the beginning of my pubic bone. I burned red, giving myself a headache. I grabbed the duvet, covering as quickly as possible. Mortified, to be on display with his beauty at the end of the bed, I couldn't think of what to say.

“What are you doing?”

“I ... I ...” Incoherent thoughts prohibited intelligent speech.

“Your scars? Bloody hell.” In a swift movement, he grabbed the duvet and slung it off. “I love every one of them. I'd rather a woman with scars than one with a perfect body. I prefer warriors, not damsels.”

Distress and amazement warred as I tried to cover myself. He landed on top of me with a quick hop, kissing me first before sitting on his heels and using a finger to trace every scar. “So lovely. I know men are supposed to have scars, but I was raised in a time when women were free, warriors in their own right. They were celebrated. Scars are a sign of a fighter, someone who refused to die, a warrior soul. Male and female alike, held in high esteem. And you, Kylie, are one of the strongest women I've ever known.”

He stopped
my attempt to roll away. A quick motion and I was slammed into his chest, and he roughly took control with a handful of my hair. I hissed in surprise, followed by the same need to submit to his hold.