Forever Red (13 page)

I smiled, even though I wanted to scream. Or punch him. “Then neither do I.” I glanced around the large room, finding the jock table instantly. Ally and her band of bitches were watching us, but everyone else was lost in conversation. The thought of him spending the night with her, laughing and dancing, and even potentially putting his lips to hers, disgusted me. The fact that he’d chosen her over me, knowing my history with this chick, destroyed me. My choice was easy. “We’re done.”

His hand grabbed me as I turned to walk away, holding me in place. “You don’t mean that. You’re pissed. But you are not breaking up with me.”

I pried my wrist from his grasp. “Actually, I am.”

I don’t know which of us was more surprised when I turned, holding my head high, and walked away.

I literally ran into Mike two seconds later. He grasped my upper arm, steadying me so I didn’t fall backward. “Lia?” His voice was filled with concern as he looked over my face. “What can I do?”

I shook my head as the first tear started to fall and I batted at it angrily. “Nothing. I’m suddenly not feeling well. I need to go home.”

He turned, pulling me down the hall. “I’ll skip and take you.”

“No!” I was angry with Neil, but I couldn’t let him think the worst of his best friend. “It’ll be better if someone else gives me a ride.”

Mike snorted, throwing an arm over my shoulder and leading me to the parking lot. “No it won’t. It doesn’t matter who it is; Kelly will lose his shit. At least I’m someone you know.”

He led me to his Jeep and opened the door. I sank back against his seat, finally letting the rest of the tears come. Mike didn’t say a word, just offered me a hand to hold.

“I think I broke up with him,” I finally admitted once we were sitting in front of my house. “Oh, my God! I just broke up with Neil.” The realization made me feel like I was going to hurl.

“Why?” The question was simple, but the answer was so complicated.

I let it out, verbal diarrhea running wild as I told him about prom with Ally, the camping trip that Neil and I were supposed to take instead of going to the sexed up ritual, and the fact that I’d threatened to invite him in Neil’s place.

Instead of being angry, he laughed. “Well, you do know how much I love to sleep in a tent.”

That made me smile, considering the last time I’d been in a tent with him he’d peed his pants, convinced that he couldn’t leave the tent to go or he’d be eaten by the aliens that had invaded Earth just to find, and kill, the two of us. “Have you been camping since the last time with me?”

He nodded. “Absolutely. Just never alone. I like to have a group of people with me, that way if the aliens ever do come after me, I’ll have a chance to get away while they’re eating everyone else.”

I shook my head, rolling my eyes as I wiped the last of my tears away. “Yeah, that makes complete sense.”

“About as much as this shit between you and Kelly.”

I swallowed, not sure how to reply. I looked over at my house, suddenly too tired to go inside.

Mike squeezed my hand, which I hadn’t known he was still holding. “Want me to come in?”

I didn’t want to be alone, but I also didn’t want to be alone with him, either. Instead, I turned to him. “Am I overreacting?”

Mike tipped his head back, offering me a sad smile. “Lia, he’s my best friend.” His confession caused me to take a deep breath, suddenly feeling very alone. “But I also consider you one of the best friends I’ve ever had. I’m Switzerland – here for both of you.”

“He needs you.”

“So do you.” He tugged on a strand of my hair playfully. “What I think isn’t important. Do you think you’re overreacting?”

I shrugged. “You know me. I always act on gut instinct and then regret it.” I bit the inside of my cheek. “Allyson is a breaking point for me. I just can’t understand why he didn’t tell me he wanted to go to prom. Or that his parents expected him to go with her. What else hasn’t he told me?”

“What haven’t you told him? How many skeletons are in your closet, ready to jump out at him?” His question hit its mark and I swallowed audibly. “I’m not telling you what to do, kid. But I think you should go chill out and give it some time. Let Kelly realize he was a dick. Make him grovel.”

The thought terrified me. “What do I do if he doesn’t?”

Mike grinned and winked suggestively. “Then you and I will have one helluva camping trip.”

I’d pictured the whole thing going so much better in my mind. I’d planned the entire conversation out, having rebuttals ready for every argument she could possibly have. I knew I could convince her that this was just a stupid way to make my parents happy and get them off my ass so I could spend some serious alone time with her over the next few weeks.

That’s if I couldn’t persuade her to come to prom with us, as my date, of course, but with Allyson tagging along. I was positive that if Ally knew we were going as a group, she’d miraculously find a date herself. It was clear that she wanted me simply because she couldn’t have me.

My parents knew that Lia and I were serious, but that didn’t stop my mom from trying to meddle. She constantly invited Ally and her mom to the house, finding every opportunity to push the two of us together. When I tried to get out of the weekly dinner with Ally’s family, Mom made it pretty clear that if I missed a single meal, she would ground me. Not wanting to be separated from Lia again, I made sure I was in my seat each time the Jacksons came over.

They weren’t horrible people, even though their daughter acted like a pretentious whore at school. As the weeks passed, I actually started looking forward to their visits. Mrs. Jackson was a soft-spoken woman with kind eyes who believed her place was staying home to be a dedicated mom and loyal wife. Mr. Jackson was the polar opposite: loud, obnoxious, and married to his career. They were both hilarious and nice, even though they couldn’t see their daughter for who she was. To be fair though, she acted like a different person in front of them. Their views on life and their commentary of us – and each other – was phenomenal.

Right before dessert three weeks ago, Mr. Jackson had casually asked me if I was going to prom. I’d said no, but they all insisted I had to go, just to have the experience with my Maine friends. After that, someone mentioned that even though Allyson was heading up the dance committee, she didn’t have a date.

Never one to miss an opportunity, Mom suggested that since Lia didn’t want to go, I should take Ally instead. That way, I wouldn’t miss out, and neither would she. Everyone, except me, thought it was a perfect idea.

I’d been vehemently against it. I didn’t want to spend five minutes alone with the manipulative man-eater, let alone an entire evening. I’d simply smiled, said we’d see, and changed the subject. I thought they’d all let it go.

Until the beginning of the week.

I’d made the baseball team, and with the practice schedule, I had next to no alone time with Lia. I’d forgotten the withdrawal my body physically felt when I didn’t spend enough time with her. The loss made me edgy and defensive as if she were a deadly drug that my body craved in order to survive. I felt like a bomb, waiting for something to set me off.

Coach took it easy on us the first week, but the second week was brutal. After an early morning workout that had me regretting staying inside all winter, coupled with lack of sleep from late-night practices and homework, I hit the locker room, in a hurry to get to Red. Until a freshman tapped me on the shoulder. “Some chick is here to see you.”

I threw on my shirt, expecting to find Lia in the hallway. Instead, Allyson held a cup of coffee in my direction. “We had practice, too,” she said with a genuine smile. “Thought we could have breakfast together.”

I shook my head. “Thanks, but Lia and I usually grab something after I pick her up.”

“You can at least take a quick coffee break.” She gave me a pleading look when I hesitated, ready to tell her to go to hell. “Come on. Five minutes. Please?”

Five minutes couldn’t hurt, right? I nodded, turned, and following her out on to the empty field, dropping my exhausted body onto the bleachers next to her. “Thanks for the coffee.” I reached for the offered cup, feeling uncomfortable.

“Have you thought any more about prom?”

No beating around the bush with this one. “I haven’t. I’ve been too busy making other plans that weekend.”

“Hmmm.” She leaned over, elbows on her knees, keeping eye contact. “Have you told her that your family is moving home yet?”

She didn’t need to specify whom she was talking about, because there was only one “her” that would care that I was going back to Alabama. I hadn’t told her yet. I didn’t know how to.

I couldn’t explain our relationship. We were happy, so fucking happy, but there was an undercurrent that put us both on edge. It felt like one wrong move, one step in the wrong direction, and I’d lose her. I was afraid that if I told her, she’d leave me. I wanted to enjoy the time I had with her, even if it meant she’d hate me once I was gone.

My silence only made Allyson smile. “I have an idea.”

“Yeah? What’s that?”

“You take me to prom and I won’t tell her that you’re moving home in June. Or that I’m coming with you for the summer. I’ve known Lia all my life”—she paused, sipping coffee—“and she doesn’t trust people easily. When she finds out you and I are going to spend three months together, she’s going to wonder why you didn’t tell her yourself. Then she’ll wonder what else you’re hiding.”

My eyes narrowed at her threat. “What are you talking about?”

“Your mom didn’t share the great news?” Ally only batted her eyelashes, as if my hateful glare had no effect on her. “Daddy’s going to China for six weeks, and Mom really wanted to go with him, but wouldn’t leave me alone. So your parents invited me to come stay with you on your grandfather’s ranch.”

I made it through the day without blowing up, but I wasn’t sure how. I confronted my mom as soon as I got home that night. She tried to wave it off, saying she and my dad were trying to help a friend. When she brought up the dance again, though, I knew I’d been trapped into the world’s worst setup.

Pulling a swatch of material from her pocket, she set it on the counter in front of me. “This is the color of Ally’s dress. Take it with you when you order your tux and flowers.”

I didn’t reach out to grab it. “I told you I wasn’t going to prom.”

“And I told you that you were.” She gave me one of her looks, silently daring me to be dumb enough to argue.

“Why is this such an issue? It’s a dumb dance that I don’t want to go to, so why can’t you drop it?”

Mom shook her head and sighed. “Because you do want to go, Nate. You were looking forward to it until Lia said she didn’t. Your dad and I don’t want you to miss out on your last big high school experience here just because of a girl. You’ll regret it later, I promise you.” She didn’t give me a chance to respond before she leaned forward and patted my hand. “You’re going. If Lia wants to go, take her instead. But if not, you’re taking Ally.”

“I promised Lia I’d take her away that weekend.”

Wrinkling her nose in disapproval, she shook her head. “You can go the next weekend. With or without her, you’re going to that prom.”

*****

I had never gotten to ask Lia, though. I’d hinted a couple of times, but thought I had more time. Then Ally had grabbed me before lunch to tell me that she had slipped and now all her friends knew that we were going together. Those same friends had last period with Lia.

Remembering the way I’d handled the delivery, I wished I could take it all back. I should have gone straight to Lia and told her that we only had a few months left together and that my parents were insisting I go to prom, begging her to come with me. Instead, I’d been a dick. And she’d broken up with me.

Or at least tried to. If she thought I was going to let her get away that easily, she hadn’t learned anything over the last few months. I left my last period early, planting myself against the lockers across from Lia’s classroom, needing to talk to her.

When the bell rang, I waited, but it was Allyson that grinned when she saw me. “You didn’t have to wait for me after class!” Turning to one of her cheerleader friends, she practically squealed, “Isn’t he the greatest?”

I glowered at her. “I’m waiting for Lia.”

Not letting my words bother her, she slid up to me, reminding me of a snake ready to strike. “Why? She broke up with you.”

“We had a fight.” I moved my eyes back to the door, watching for the familiar streak of red. “I told you I’d take you to prom. You got what you wanted. Don’t make this harder than it has to be.”

She moved close, invading my personal space, and ran a hand down the middle of my chest. “If you give me a few minutes, I’ll make it harder than it has ever been.”

Disgusted, I moved sideways and gave her a nasty look. “Fuck you, Ally.”

She only laughed. “Soon, Nathaniel. Soon.”

I resisted the urge to shove her away from me. The class had cleared out, and either Lia heard my voice and was now hiding until I left or she hadn’t been in class. If I were late to practice, Coach would have my ass. I glared down at the pest that just wasn’t taking the hint. “Was Lia in class?”

“No.” Jules walked out of the classroom just then, face full of concern. “She went home.”

“Is she okay?” I moved into the hall, trying to put distance between Ally and me.

“I’m sure she’s better than okay. Mike took her.”

I didn’t turn to look at the voice that was all too happy to share that detail. Instead, I kept my eyes glued to Lia’s best friend, waiting for confirmation.

Julie scrunched up her face as if she was trying to decide what to tell me. Then she glared at the girl behind me and snapped, “She’ll be fine.” She turned and walked away, not even pausing when I called out to her.

I turned in the opposite direction, determined to find out what in the fuck happened to my girlfriend and why she’d gone anywhere with Carson.

Carson wasn’t in the locker room so I dropped my bag, kicked off my sneakers, and pulled my shirt over my head. I’d just changed out of my jeans when Mike came in. He didn’t say a word, just nodded a hello and headed to the locker right behind mine.

“Where have you been?” I asked, voice as casual as I could make it.

He stopped what he was doing and turned toward me. “I took Lee home.”

I hated his stupid pet name for her almost as much as I hated the fact that he’d been alone with her. I mean, really. Who needs to have a nickname for a nickname?

“I could have taken her.”

His eyes narrowed at me. “She needs some time.”

I was across the aisle and in his face before I realized I was moving. “What the fuck is your problem?”

Hands shoved my shoulders, pushing me away. “What the fuck is yours?”

Slamming him back into the locker, I leaned down, growling, “She’s my girlfriend, asshole. Not yours.”

“
Was
your girlfriend.”

I threw the first punch, but in seconds, we’d both landed more than I could count. Arms pulled me back, hauling me away from my friend, putting space between the two of us. When my eyes could focus again, I saw that Coach was restraining him, just like my teammates were me.

“You made her cry, dickhead. No one makes Lee cry!”

The words cut. I hated when Lia cried. It made me want to find the source of the pain and destroy it with my bare hands. The fact that she’d been that sad over something I’d done was enough to make me hate myself.

Coach was yelling something about the two of us being benched for the first game and doing extra drills at practice. Then he sent everyone else out of the room. Pointing at me, he lifted his head slightly. “You done?”

Was I? I didn’t know. I did know that I wanted to hit something, but it didn’t have to be Carson’s face. I shrugged. Then he turned to Mike, asking the same, but he only nodded.

“Jesus Christ, you two!” Stepping between us, he sneered. “Go home. You’re done for the night. When you get here in the morning, this shit with Lia better be behind you.” He stormed off before either of us could respond.

Mike shoved his cleats in his locker and slammed the door. He was going to have a nasty shiner. From the feel of it, I was going to look as bad as he was in the morning.

“I fucked up.”

“You did.” He nodded absentmindedly. “Why in the hell would you agree to take Ally anywhere?”

“It’s a long story.”

He shrugged. “Matthews sent us home, remember? I’d say we got the time.”

*****

Three hours later, I knocked on her door, half expecting her not to answer. I wasn’t even sure why I was there, other than I needed to make sure she was okay. I needed to know that we would be okay.

She answered the door with a slight smile, but I could tell she was nervous because her fingers were tapping out an erratic rhythm on her leg. When she got a closer look, her eyes grew wide. “What happened to your face?”

“Carson and I had a disagreement. Can I come in?”

She nodded, stepping back. She closed the door behind me but didn’t move.

“We gotta talk,” I said and she nodded again but moved to the sofa. I sat next to her, aching to touch her. After a few minutes of silence, I sighed. “I don’t know where to start.”

She reached a hand out, closing cold fingers around mine. “The beginning is always a good place.”

I gripped her hand. “I love you.” I’d said the words a million times in my mind but hadn’t vocalized them since that night in the hotel. “It scares the shit out of me. How much I feel for you. I can’t explain it. I’m obsessed.”