Forever Pucked (22 page)

We catch them on the stairs. My dad looks like he’s trying to hump her from behind.

“Hey, where are you guys going?”

My mom startles and moves to the next step, away from my dad. “Oh, Alex! I didn’t expect you two to be awake! We were taking your dad’s bag to the room.”

I glance at the front door where my dad’s suitcase sits. “Kinda helps if you take it with you.”

“Oh! Oops! Well, that’s okay. We can do it later.”

My dad doesn’t seem all that excited about doing it later. He looks more annoyed than anything, but he comes back down the stairs, turning on a smile for Violet.

“Hi, sweetheart. How’s your week been? Alex is a mopey shit when he’s not feeling well. I hope he hasn’t been driving you insane.” He pulls her into a hug and shoots a glare at me over her shoulder.

“He’s been good, keeping the moping to a minimum for the most part.”

My mother clears her throat like she’s choking on something. I haven’t been that bad. I don’t think.

He whispers something to Violet, and she chuckles.

I turn my attention back to my mom, who’s come down the stairs to join us. She’s touching her hair, twirling it around her finger like Sunny often does when she’s nervous or thinking. She looks ten years younger.

“Wow, Mom, you look great.”

“Doesn’t she?” My dad checks out my mom the way I do Violet after I’ve been at a series of away games—like I want to get her naked and do dirty things to her. It’s a little weird. They must’ve been on their way upstairs to get their freak on before we stopped them.

My dad hugs me and grumbles something about me being a cockblocker, then slaps me on the back, making me groan. He eases up. “Still pretty sore?”

“It’s getting better.”

He nods and doesn’t push me to say anything else, which is good, because talking about how long it’s going to take to recover from this injury puts me in a bad mood. After the first couple of days I was sure I’d be fine by the end of the month. But considering the slow progression this week, and the reading I’ve done, I’m starting to come to terms with the fact that I’ll be on the bench quite a while. I can’t even start rehab for at least two more weeks, and that’ll be limited to the recumbent bike and lower body only. Dislocated shoulders are almost as bad as broken bones, and concussions as serious as mine mean a significant recovery period. Next season has never seemed so far away.

My dad and I sit at the island and eat the fruit platter Violet’s preparing while my mom puts fresh bread in the oven to bake. My dad eats the fruit almost as quickly as Violet cuts it up. Everyone should be here soon. Along with Violet’s parents, my sister and Miller, Charlene, Darren, Lily, and Randy are all coming over. Lance might even stop by. I have a newfound respect for him since he was benched for five games after beating the shit out of Cockburn.

On the other hand, I’m feeling ambivalent about Randy’s recent string of goals. The team has won the last two away games, thanks to his superior skills. As good as that is, it’s not so good for my position when I return to the ice. I’ll be at tomorrow’s home game, even though it means warming the bench and watching Ballistic get all my ice time.

Skye and Sidney are the first to arrive, and Skye freaks out about my mom’s hair. It’s weird to see two grown women get that excited about anything, let alone hair, but the attention seems to make my mom happy.

Sid gives me a light back pat while Violet hugs her mom and they talk about how awesome my mom’s hair is.

I’m nervous about our moms being together today, because it’s unlikely they’ll be able to stop themselves from asking Violet about the wedding. She may have mentioned it of her own accord this morning, but I don’t want anyone to push it. Not if I’m finally making headway.

I’ve already asked my mom not to bring it up, because we’ve got enough going on, but that doesn’t mean Skye won’t say something.

“I brought some things!” Skye sets a bag of groceries on the counter. It’s not actually a bag of groceries. It’s orange juice and several bottles of champagne.

“Mimosas!” my mom says, clapping excitedly.

I’m not so sure Skye is the best influence on my mother. Skye likes to drink, and she can hold her liquor. My mom, on the other hand, tries to keep up but gets sloppy a lot faster. This should be an interesting meal.

Violet chops up a pineapple while her mom gets out champagne glasses and starts mixing drinks. Violet almost chops off one of my dad’s fingers because he can’t seem to wait until she puts the fruit on the plate.

“Robbie! Be careful! You need those fingers,” my mom admonishes.

Skye whispers something in my mom’s ear, and the two of them giggle like teenage girls.

Violet rolls her eyes and keeps chopping. She stabs a chunk with a toothpick and reaches across the island. Instead of taking it, I bite it off the toothpick.

“Looks like the Waters men are interested in getting some action later. You should get on that, too, Sidney.” Skye winks at him.

“Mom, please.”

“What?” Skye takes a sip of her drink, testing it out. “Too much orange juice.”

“Can we please have one family get-together without me needing therapy afterward?” Violet mutters.

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Mom...”

“Well, you know what they say about pineapple,” Skye whispers.

My mom cocks her head to the side and twirls her hair around her finger.

Violet speaks before Skye can. “Seriously. Please do not tell Daisy that pineapple makes jizz taste better. It doesn’t. That’s a lie some man made up so that women will willingly swallow a load of splooge.”

Sidney slaps the counter. “I think we should go sit down in the living room and let the girls do their thing.”

My dad grabs the fruit tray and follows him. Violet shoots me a look that tells me she’s not going to be all that excited if I leave, but I shrug and push away from the island. There’s no way I’m staying for a conversation about the taste of jizz.

Conversations We

Should Never Have

VIOLET

Alex backs out of the kitchen, leaving me to deal with my mom and Daisy and conversations about pineapple-flavored jizz, as there’s no one else here yet to act as a buffer. After all my efforts and sweating this morning, I’m less than impressed with Alex’s choice to escape. Thankfully Charlene and Darren show up shortly thereafter.

They stop in the kitchen to say hello, but Darren soon disappears into the living room with the rest of the men. On the way out he spears a piece of pineapple from the cutting board and shoves it into his mouth. My mom and Daisy start giggling again, of course. The two of them have already polished off half a pitcher of mimosas. I haven’t even touched mine. If I’m going to set a wedding date today—or at least commit to setting one—I’m damn well going to be sober. That way no one can talk me into doing something I don’t want to. Like having it televised.

“Charlene, maybe you can help us out,” my mom announces. “Violet thinks pineapple doesn’t change the taste of…” She gestures to her crotch meaningfully. “But Daisy and I disagree.”

“You don’t have to answer that,” I jump in. “In fact, it’s probably better if you don’t encourage these two.” I narrow my eyes at the moms.

My mom
tsk
s me. “Since when have you become such a prude, Violet?”

“Prude? Seriously? Are there no boundaries here? Since when is it appropriate to talk about the flavor of jizz with my mom and my fiancé’s mother?”

“I think it’s a perfectly normal discussion. Don’t you, Daisy?” My mom looks to Alex’s mom for confirmation.

“I think it’s great that you and Violet have such an open relationship, Skye,” Charlene says with an evil smile. “I wish I could talk to my mom about this kind of stuff, but she’s kind of reserved.”

I kick Charlene, so she pinches my side. Her mom isn’t reserved at all.

My mom puts her hand on Charlene’s shoulder. “You know you can always talk to me about these kinds of things, sweetie. I had a lot of fun before I settled down with Sidney, if you know what I mean.”

“Robbie’s the only man I’ve ever been with.” Daisy’s doing that twirling thing again with her hair.

My mom is definitely on the road to drunk, based on how touchy she’s become. She pulls Daisy into a side-hug. “Since I already know the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree in the package department, I can see why you would’ve claimed Robbie as soon as you could!”

“It was a little scary the first time.”

“For the love of—” The doorbell rings. “I’ll get that!” I yell, already on the move. Right about now I’d accept a stitchable laceration to get out of this dick discussion.

“I’ll come with you!” Charlene follows me down the hall to the front door.

“Thanks for encouraging that. My therapy bills are going to be through the roof after today.” I elbow her in the side.

“Those two are crazy.”

“Do you think we’ll be like that when we’re their age?”

“I sure as hell hope so.”

I open the front door to find Buck and Sunny, Balls and Lily, and Lance standing on the doorstep. Lance’s massive lime green Hummer is parked in the driveway behind them. It’s like a tank, but way more conspicuous. Kind of like Lance.

“Come on in, guys. Lily, Sunny, you’re just in time to be emotionally scarred by hearing my mom and Daisy talk about jizz.”

“So the usual?” Lily comes in for a hug.

“Do you girls talk about anything other than sex?” Randy helps Lily out of her coat and adjusts the strap of her dress, bending to kiss her shoulder. Those two radiate hormones.

“Not really,” Charlene replies.

“I’m more than willing to hang out and talk about sex with you girls,” Lance says.

“Over my dead fucking body, Romance,” Randy says.

“So territorial.” Lily rolls her eyes, but she’s grinning.

Lance winks and squeezes my shoulder. “How’s the captain doing?”

“He’s getting better. It’s slow going, but he looks a lot less like he’s a victim of a mugging.”

“Good to hear. He’s missed on the ice.”

“You should tell him that. I think his ego is almost as broken as his body.”

I like Lance a lot more since he kicked the shit out of Cockburn. Not because of the reciprocated violence, but because of the retribution. He also dropped by the hospital more than once. I still think he’s the biggest manwhore in the entire league, but he’s a good guy, even with the serious commitment and anger-management issues. He’s a softie under that mountain of muscle and rage. He’s messaged me every day and called to check on me and Alex. It’s sweet.

Buck and Sunny are standing off to the side, whispering. Buck’s cradling her cheek in his palm, forehead creased, and Sunny seems pale.

“Everything okay with those two?” I ask Lily, since they don’t seem to be paying attention to anyone outside their bubble.

“We were playing charades until late.” Lily says. “And drinking too much wine.”

“Charades, huh?”

“The boys refused to play strip poker.” Lily shrugs.

“Only I see you naked,” Randy growls.

I’m missing all the action. With Alex being injured and Daisy here, company hasn’t been an option, and I haven’t felt right about going out to have fun while Alex suffers alone.

Buck and Sunny finally break apart. It’s normal for him to fawn over her, but this seems excessive. “Sweets, I think you should sit down,” he tells her.

“Honestly, I’m fine, Miller.” She pats his hand and smiles, but she looks tired, and her eyes are red and puffy when she turns to me. “How’s everything? Is my mom driving you nuts? What about Alex?”

“I haven’t had to make a meal since she got here, and Alex is doing well, considering.”

“She really does love to cook.”

“I think we have meals covered for the next month.”

“You need help with that, let me know; I’m always available for dinners on off-game days.” Lance pats his insane shirt-covered six-pack.

“So are we.” Randy slips his arm around Lily’s waist and pulls her against him. Probably so he can rub his dick on her.

“I can cook just fine.” Lily looks legitimately offended.

“You sure can, luscious, but I’m just offering our exceptional company in case Vi and Alex need it. Plus, I like their bathrooms.”

I point a finger at Lily, because she’s as bad as Randy with the sneaking off to have sex. “You two aren’t allowed to disappear upstairs. Daisy’s sleeping in the room you two like to get your fuck on in.”

“There are plenty of rooms in this house, and beds are totally overrated.” Randy rubs his beard on Lily’s neck and she shivers.

It’s like beard porn. I don’t know how she stands it. I can’t manage Alex with a scruffy face in the winter. My skin gets all red, and then it chafes and peels. Not sexy.

“You should ignore those two,” Sunny motions to Lily and Randy. “It’s like mating season.”

“Really? You’re going to talk to me about mating?” Lily shoots back.

Sunny’s eyes flash, and Lily makes a face like she crapped her pants.

“Where’s Alex?” Buck asks.

“They’re all in the living room. They left when our moms started with the flavored-jizz talk.”

Sunny either pretends I didn’t say that or misses it completely. “Alex has been okay, though? He can be difficult when he’s not feeling well.”

“Oh, God! Remember when Alex got the flu, and he hurled in the middle of the hallway after eating a Big Mac combo? That was the worst idea ever.” Lily makes a gagging sound.

Sunny puts her hand to her mouth. I think she might legitimately be gagging. “I need the bathroom.” She hurries down the hall and slams the door.

“Guess we won’t be using that bathroom later,” Randy says to Lily.

“Is she okay?” I ask.

“Just feeling under the weather, that’s all. She’ll be fine,” Lily reassures me.

Buck rubs the back of his neck. “You guys go ahead. I’ll make sure Sunny’s okay.”

“I can stay with her if you want,” Lily offers.

“It’s cool. I got this.”

Lily pats him on the shoulder, and we leave Buck in the hallway, tapping on the bathroom door.

“Must’ve been one hell of a night.” I’m not sure if I’m disappointed I’ve been missing out on the fun, or worried about Sunny getting so drunk she’s sick the next day.