She paused. Her stomach churned, making her nauseous. “There must be something you can do, so Jake can keep Annie…She was entrusted to him.”
Jenna shook her head. “Oh, Valerie, I know.”
Lucas appeared behind his mate. “We’re going to the council to vouch for him. If we can help it, Annie will remain in Jacob’s custody.”
“He
can’t
lose her. He needs her. She’s everything to him.” The tears she fought welled, then spilled down her cheeks. “It will kill him if he loses her.”
Next thing she knew, Jenna wrapped her arms around her. “It’s going to be okay. If any one of us can help it, we will.”
“Jacob needs you now.”
Jenna pulled away from her.
She wiped her cheeks, her gaze on Lucas. “Me?”
He nodded.
She shook her head. “I’ve spent time with them both, and I can vouch for them. I can—”
“No.” Lucas shook his head. “You need to go to him. He needs you.”
In regard to Jake, Valerie had a knack for making things worse. She feared him, how he made her feel, and besides, her gift warned her away. “I can’t… Please, let me go with you.”
“I know you’ll vouch for him, but you’ve only known him a short time. I’ve known him for centuries, so have the other Guardians. Don’t worry.”
She left feeling like she hadn’t accomplished a thing. Entering her apartment, she spotted Ashley and Clyde.
“Val, are you going to Jake?”
She swallowed back tears. “I can’t…” What would she say? How could she possibly do anything to comfort him?
“He needs you.”
Ashley wasn’t the first to say it, and it was no less absurd hearing it from her. “Why do people keep saying that? He needs Annie…”
She paused for a moment, then said, “And why does everyone assume I would’ve gone with him? I was Annie’s nanny for a week. He doesn’t need me to watch her if he’s with her.”
Ashley’s cheeks tinted a rosy shade. Her head snapped up toward her soulmate.
When neither Ashley nor Clyde provided an explanation, she added, “He probably needs a friend. Jake and I aren’t friends. Ashley, you should go.”
Clyde’s arm went around Ashley’s shoulders and tightened. “Because you pushed him away.”
“Are you kidding me?” Her cheeks heated. “I’m in no mood to hear about your insecurities.”
“This has nothing to do with me.”
She lifted a brow. “Sure.”
“Your sheer stubbornness tries my temper. No one has accomplished that in a millennium.”
Ashley cleared her throat.
Valerie’s eyes narrowed. “Jake tried your temper last week.”
“Doesn’t count. It relates to my mate.”
Ashley exhaled. “I can’t have the two of you fighting. We need to help Jake.” She looked between the two. “We have to go to the demon plane, Val. We have to vouch for Jake. He needs a friend. I’ll be gone, and I know you can help him through this.”
“Ash, I…” She shook her head. “…can’t.” Her magic was all she had. Ignoring her gift after everything she’d been through, wasn’t smart. “I wouldn’t even know where to start.”
“She’s got everything twisted in her head.”
Val’s gaze shot to Clyde, looking at his mate. She could stake her life on the fact they were communicating telepathically as mated pairs could. It was one thing to have him in her thoughts, another completely if he shared them with Ashley, Jake’s friend. Cheeks flaming, she snapped, “Stop that.”
“I’m trying to help you and him.” He took a seat on the couch across from her, then nestled Ashley beside him.
“Why? You hate him.”
“I don’t hate him. I understand him too well. What I hate is not spending time with my mate, and he disrupts, often.”
“For Annie,” she retorted. “For a helpless child he adores, who needs help.”
“I’m not perfect, and I’m mated.”
“As if that’s an excuse.”
“It isn’t an excuse. It’s a fact of life…immortal lives. You will learn one day.”
The glimmer of humor in his eyes returned. She had the sudden urge to smack him. Odd, since she could do much worse like turn him into a frog. She smiled.
“Everything you assumed isn’t true. The memory you saw of him with the demoness…She didn’t leave him. She died the same way his parents died, the same way his sister and her mate died. They were killed by Malums.”
Her smile died. Her chest tightened. The desire to soothe the pain of his loss as if she had the power overwhelmed her.
God, so stupid to think he’d been dumped. Who would dump him anyway? No one. Even with her deep-seated fear of falling for a man who wasn’t hers, she wanted him. She shook her head, wishing it would erase what she’d learned. She didn’t want to know more. It would only succeed in driving her into his arms where she’d end up hurt.
“She wasn’t his mate,” Clyde continued, “but you already knew that. You have feelings for him.”
Her eyes narrowed. Why did he continue to dig through her mind? Hadn’t he ever learned proper manners? A wonder he and Jake hadn’t come to blows.
“He wouldn’t do that. He cares for Ashley too much.”
She fisted her hands. “Stop that.”
Ashley turned to her mate, pushing his arm off her. “That’s enough.” She faced her. “What Clyde means is your feelings are mutual. Jake cares about you.”
Her heart skipped a beat.
Clyde wrapped his arm around his mate, then looked at her and admitted, “He does.”
She let out a breath.
Could they be right? Did Jake care about her? “Jake doesn’t even know me,” she whispered in denial.
“You barely know him, but that hasn’t stopped you. You’ve more than showed us all how much,” Ashley said softly.
Her cheeks burned, recounting how she’d acted, even crying—making a complete fool of herself. She rubbed her hands over her face.
“It doesn’t matter we kissed, and…” She paused, suddenly aware she’d admitted that aloud. Then again, if Clyde read her mind, he knew, which meant chances were Ashley knew, too. “He pulled away…like…” Like he regretted it. “Then said, ‘I needed that.’ ”
Ashley frowned. “I—”
“Like if it didn’t matter who I was. It could have been any woman.”
“You are more stubborn than a mule,” Clyde’s tone clipped. “And you have one of the most negative minds, I’ve ever encountered. You naturally assume the worst. The man hasn’t kissed another woman for centuries. Did you ever consider he pulled away because he didn’t want things to go too far, too soon?”
He shrugged. “Maybe he wanted to give you time to get to know him or maybe he thought if things went too far, too soon, you’d assume he just wanted something temporary, instead of what he wants, something deeper, long-term.”
Something deeper? Long-term? Why? “No, he said—”
“I believe he said, ‘Thank you. I needed that.’ When does that mean, ‘Any woman will do’?”
Her heart, heavy with guilt, tightened. Feeling like an idiot and unwilling to hold Clyde’s stifling stare, she buried her head in her hands. Why had she assumed the worst of Jake? Why did she continue to do so?
Trouble.
Her gift continued to nudge her, warn her away.
Yet they were more alike than she realized. He’d lost so much. She’d been awful after they shared that magnificent kiss. God, she even refused to let him explain. He’d gone as far as to plead with her. He’d been so willing to do anything, but she refused to listen. Her pride meant more. If only she’d let him explain. Instead, she let a week slip by, barely speaking to him and avoiding him. Then, he rushed to her side fearing she’d been hurt, and she
hurt
him again, telling him they hadn’t need him. She tried to apologize, but by then, it had been too little too late.
If he had feelings for her, he wouldn’t now. She ruined everything.
Not that it mattered; she couldn’t forget her gift’s warning. She couldn’t let herself fall for a man who’d never be hers.
Ashley opened her mouth to speak. Valerie beat her to it. “Don’t. I don’t want to know anymore.”
“Don’t let fear stop you from enjoying all life still has to offer you, especially after everything you’ve lost.”
“It’s the reason I can’t give in. I can’t fall for him. He’ll break my heart. I’ve already lost too much.”
“Oh, Val,” Ashley whispered. “Why do you assume he’ll break your heart? He loved the demoness with all his heart, and she wasn’t even his.”
It made sense. She found herself wondering what it would be like if she gave into her desires wholeheartedly. Would it be as wonderful as she imagined, not just having someone, having Jake, the man who captivated her?
No, it could never happen.
“You have an irrational fear of abandonment.”
Her jaw dropped open.
“Your parents.”
Her eyes welled. “Stop it,” she said weakly. “P-please. Stop.”
“I told you not to let what happened to you shape your future. That applies to
everything
that’s happened to you.”
Tears in her eyes slid down her face.
Ashley’s eyes saddened. Her brows drew together. She then looked up to her mate and met her gaze. “Can you promise you’ll think about it?”
She would think about it whether she promised or not. “Yes, I will.”
****
Daylight faded. Valerie sat on the couch, wringing her hands. She’d done this endlessly for three days. Trying to watch TV, trying to read, anything to keep her mind off Jake and Annie, but nothing helped.
Her mind wandered and wandered, always to Jake and Annie. She thought a lot about what Ashley and Clyde said. It made her want to go after him, after them.
Three days without their presence had been rough. She missed them. The thought of eleven more days without either of them seemed like eternity. Annie had become a lifeline in her new reality, and Jake…well, she just missed
him
. She couldn’t say why or how that was possible. They hadn’t been on good terms, but that didn’t mean she didn’t look forward to seeing him every night before he went off to fight Malums, didn’t mean she didn’t worry for hours, didn’t mean she wasn’t relieved the second he came home.
Yet, none of that meant she should crash their vacation. She thought about it and came to a conclusion. If he lost custody of Annie, this was precious time he and Annie would both cherish for the rest of their lives. She had no right to butt in. He deserved another apology at least, but it could wait.
Did he really care about her? Clyde and Ashley wouldn’t lie. Still, she couldn’t believe it. He was so…handsome, and strong and simply breathtaking. Any woman could fall for him. His smile like his anger could melt her. She was just…her.
Sitting on the couch, an open book resting on Val’s lap, Nathan materialized in front of her, halting her rambling thoughts. “Pack a bag, come.”
God, not this again. Why did everyone keep insisting she should be with Jake? It didn’t make any sense. “Not you, too?”
“As a friend I’m telling you if you don’t go, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life.”
She laughed, humorlessly. “The rest of my life?”
He squared his shoulders. “What have you done today? Yesterday? How about the day before?”
“What does that have to do with anything?”
“You haven’t done a damned thing. You’ve been sitting here stewing in guilt. Why don’t you just go and make things right?”
“This isn’t a normal man we’re talking about. This is Jake.” And she was a coward.
“He’s not angry with you.”
“How do
you
know?”
“Because I know,” he said, firmly. “Now let’s go. I don’t have much time, and you need to dress and pack.”
She stood and, because he was so much taller, her head shot back to meet his gaze. “No.”
“If you don’t dress and pack, I’ll materialize you to Jacob in that.” His gaze snapped down and up again.
Though he said it with a smile, she knew he’d materialize her wearing a long shirt and barefoot. Still, she had to try. Her eyes narrowed. “You wouldn’t. I’ll turn you into…into a camel!”
His smile widened. “Go ahead.”
After a moment of silence, each staring each other down, she gave in. “Fine.” Nathan wasn’t bluffing. He’d take her and leave her, and in that case, she rather dress and grab a bag. “I’ll pack, but I know when I see him he’s going to be mad and then—”
“Then you can turn him into a horse or a bat.” He laughed. “He’d love that.”
“Not funny.”
His stare softened. “There won’t be anything to forgive. When you see him, you’ll thank me.”
Halfway down the hall, he yelled, “I’m doing this because I care.”
She packed a small duffel bag, convincing herself she’d apologize, say hi to Annie, then leave. Dressing in a pair of jeans, a fitted blue blouse, and a pair of sandals, she headed back into the living room.
When she met Nathan’s gaze, anxiety crawled up her spine. One hand tightened on her duffel, the other she wrapped around herself. What would she say? What would Jake say? Would he really be glad to see her?
She hoped so. Her fear and her gift’s warning aside, she would be glad to see them both.
Chapter 21
Annie, fast asleep, rested against him. Sadly, she drifted off before the fireworks she’d been excited to watch. He couldn’t blame her. It had been a long day. Tomorrow, he’d let her sleep in. Hopefully, then she’d stay up later.
Walking from the beach onto the hotel’s pool deck and bar, he spotted the restrooms and entered a stall, then dematerialized. A moment later, he reappeared in his hotel room.
Valerie.
Her scent wafted into his senses. His heart pounded rapidly. His hands began to sweat.
Just days without her, and he was fucking losing it. No possible way she could be here. She’d made her feelings clear. Seeing a slim silhouette at the end of the room, he flicked the lights on, and saw her more clearly.
Beautiful, a pair of jeans encasing her legs, a blue shirt hung off one shoulder; she stood at the far end of the room. Her long auburn hair in waves spilled around her heart-shaped face. Her honey eyes on him almost appeared to glow against the dimly lit room. As if he needed further proof he lost his mind, he felt worry radiate from her.
His gaze trailed up and down her body several times, waiting for the image to dissolve. It didn’t, so he forced himself to close his eyes, knowing the minute he opened them she’d disappear. Yet a moment later when he did, she was still there, still staring right back at him.