Read Darcy's Passions Online

Authors: Regina Jeffers

Darcy's Passions (3 page)

Crossing the room at the back of the Bingley party, Darcy became astutely aware of the impression they made on those assembled. He realized within five minutes both his and Bingley's financial wealth would be rumored among all those in attendance. This type of monetary evaluation played common among the upper class. Often he heard it said a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. Darcy assumed the premise permeated the thoughts of those of a lower level too.
Shortly upon their arrival, the party met Mrs. Bennet and the elder daughter. Miss Jane Bennet, he found, had golden hair, eloquent Greek features, and deep blue eyes. Darcy thought Miss Bennet attractive; in fact, she proved the only one of any note in the room, but he possessed no real desire to make her acquaintance. Immediately taken with Jane Bennet, Bingley, on the other hand, requested a turn on the dance floor with her.
Darcy walked about the room, giving offense to all who viewed him. Although handsomer than Mr. Bingley and now rumored to have ten thousand pounds per year, most of the assembly found him haughty and formal and possessing a superior bearing. Soon, most shunned his disagreeable attitude; not accustomed to attending
public assemblies, Darcy's disdain showed. He stood, being inhospitable, along the wall when Bingley came from the dance floor to press his friend into joining him. “Come, Darcy, I must have you dance. I hate to see you standing about by yourself in this stupid manner.You had much better dance.”
“I certainly shall not. You know how I detest it, unless I am particularly acquainted with my partner. At such an assembly as this, it would be insupportable.Your sisters are engaged, and there is not another woman in the room whom it would not be a punishment to me to stand up with.”
“I would not be so fastidious as you are for a kingdom!” cried Mr. Bingley. “Upon my honor, I never met with so many pleasant girls in my life as I have this evening; and there are several of them, you see, uncommonly pretty.”
Darcy looked at the eldest Miss Bennet.“You are dancing with the only handsome girl in the room.”
“Oh! She is the most beautiful creature I ever beheld! But there is one of her sisters sitting down just behind you, who is very pretty, and I dare say very agreeable. Do let me ask my partner to introduce you.”
Darcy looked around, and his gaze fell on Elizabeth Bennet; he caught her eye and unconsciously quickly withdrew his. A momentary feeling of regret shot through his body, but he shook off his unfound interest in the woman while saying coldly, “She is tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt
me
; and I am in no humor at present to give consequence to young ladies who are slighted by other men.You had better return to your partner and enjoy her smiles, for you waste your time with me.”
Shaking his head in disbelief, Bingley moved back to the dance floor to enjoy his first celebration with his new neighbors; Darcy moved in the opposite direction. He took up his post along an adjoining wall. Standing there, his eyes rested again on Elizabeth Bennet; her enigmatic smile forced him to replay his response to Bingley's entreaty in his head, making him sorry for the way he acted. Then he noticed she meant her smile for him. She smiled,
evidently, because she heard what he said and found it amusing.
How dare she ridicule his behavior with her smile! To whom did this woman think she directed her disdain?
His duty did not lie to those in this room; his duty rested with the people on Pemberley's estate; too many lives depended on him. Although he did not enjoy giving offense to the lady, maintaining his position seemed uppermost in his mind. He found her smile insulting. Insufferable!
Yet, as the evening progressed Darcy unwillingly noted although Elizabeth Bennet was not the remarkable beauty she was reported to be, she did possess a quality he could not define. Miss Elizabeth, Darcy conceded, proved herself in the dance forms, and he discovered to his dismay his eyes often fell upon her. Men and women alike sought her company, and he unconsciously became aware of her presence. She owned an unbridled freedom he saw some place else recently; Elizabeth Bennet approached the dance and ensuing conversations with an exuberance from which he had difficulty withdrawing.
CHAPTER 2
“ . . . It is often only carelessness of opinion.”
As usual, Darcy rose before the rest of the Bingley household. Sitting alone in the breakfast room at Netherfield seemed to be becoming a habit. Holding the coffee cup to his lips momentarily, he allowed his distaste for the previous evening's entertainment to play through his mind. He never saw such gaucheness gathered in one place and at one time—from the supercilious Sir William to the many women he observed of little intelligence, few true manners, and disagreeable temperaments. A shudder of disgust briefly racked his body when an enigmatic smile and an arched eyebrow played fleetingly across his memory. Darcy purposely shook his head trying to rid himself of the image. Disturbed by the vision but not knowing why, he rose quickly and strode through the hallways of Netherfield heading toward the stables. He should wait on Bingley to go riding, but it might be a long while before his friend came down. At the moment, Darcy needed to be free of the form and free of his feeling of uncertainty. Cerberus, thankfully, stood ready at the mounting block; and without realizing what he did, he turned the horse toward the same hill from which he saw the flash of color along the road several days before.
 
Darcy's energies depleted, upon his return to Netherfield, he found the Bingleys still sitting around leisurely in the morning room. Their respite into Hertfordshire society exhausted them in so many ways. Assuming an air of false hauteur, Bingley playfully turned to Darcy,“I see our friendship did not impact your decision
to ride out without me. I hoped we could continue our survey of the estate.You wounded me, Sir.”
“If you are honest with your reproofs, I beg your pardon most profusely, Bingley. Your hospitality is an honor I cherish.” Darcy looked steadfastly at his friend.
Bingley realized Darcy did not comprehend he made the disparagement in jest. He gauged having Fitzwilliam Darcy as an intimate more than favorable, his good opinion a wealth upon which value could not be taken. Bingley knew if Darcy told him to quit Netherfield, his chaise and four would leave immediately; his friend would not lead Bingley astray. “Really, Darcy,” flustered Bingley, not used to such self-reproach, “I value your opinions
and
your company.” They gave each other a quick bow indicating mutual respect; then Bingley emitted a soft laugh to relieve the unanticipated tension while both men moved to the serving tray to partake of the items there.
Darcy turned to Miss Bingley before she lambasted her brother's tarriance among Hertfordshire's finest. He knew she wanted to gain his approval by defying her brother's successes last evening.“Miss Bingley, your refinement and charity were never so appreciated as they were yesterday evening.”
Bingley joined in, “Yes, my Dear, you and Louisa were much admired. I received so many compliments on your behalf last night. I am indebted to you two in helping to establish our family's standing in the community.Your successes are our success.”
Darcy knew Miss Bingley despised last evening; she confided as much to him several times during the assembly; yet, she said,“Your attention honors me. I pray my contribution to the evening solidified your presence in the community, Charles.”
 
Leaving the ladies behind, the gentlemen retired to the study to continue their review of the Netherfield books and accounts. Darcy thoroughly enjoyed these hours of withdrawal from the niceties society placed on gentlemen; what transpired behind the study door remained within his control. It held no double-edged
expressions to dance around—no prejudices—and no enigmatic smile hauntingly resurfacing in his memory.
 
However, those hours passed too quickly; returning to the company of the ladies, Darcy and Bingley suffered when Caroline Bingley could control her opinions no longer, and they now listened to the Bingley sisters decrying their neighbors' manners; the tirade started at dinner and increased in its vehemence. Miserable, Bingley suffered greatly, but Darcy felt far from being agreeable himself; he sat with a pronounced grimace. Bingley insisted.“I never met with more pleasant people. Everyone offered their attentions and their kind regards; there was no one putting on airs or offering false countenances; I was pleased to make the acquaintance of many of my new neighbors.”
“Charles, you lack judiciousness,” Miss Bingley intoned her contempt.“The women may be pretty by your judgment; yet, they lacked conversation and fashion. Were you not aware of their conceit?”
Bingley, at least, allowed censure could not be addressed to Miss Bennet. In frustration, he turned to his friend for sympathy. Darcy's honest nature allowed him only to concede Miss Jane Bennet as attractive, but “she smiles too much.”
“Smiles too much!” Bingley nearly came out of his chair in disbelief. “I can think of no one of my acquaintance more beautiful.”
Darcy, however, finally admitted, he saw a collection of people with no manners and little beauty.“I take no interest or pleasure at the prospect of renewing their attentions.” Yet, as soon as he said it, he felt a twinge of betrayal.
Taking pity on their brother, Mrs. Hurst and her sister finally allowed Jane Bennet to be a
sweet
girl and declared their desire to know her better. They, therefore, established Miss Bennet as someone they admired and liked; Bingley accepted their praise of Miss Bennet and allowed himself the pleasure of thinking of her as someone he too
would like to know better
.
Over a fortnight Bingley continued to prefer the company of Jane Bennet to all others in Hertfordshire. Darcy observed his young friend fall in and out of romantic relationships before, but he never recalled Bingley to be more besotted. Bingley danced with Miss Bennet four times at Meryton, saw her one morning at his house, and dined in company with her four times. Unfortunately, as Bingley seemed about to give his heart to a woman clearly below him, Darcy discovered to his horror his own tendencies in that vein becoming more distinct. Every time Bingley found Miss Bennet's company, he placed Darcy, as Bingley's companion, in Elizabeth Bennet's presence. Each time as he swore to himself he would ignore Elizabeth, he found himself more enticed by her. Unconsciously, he placed himself where he could observe her, where he could listen to her conversation, and where he could interact with her. Although he rarely spoke to strangers, Darcy began to
plan
ways to afford verbal exchanges with Elizabeth. When they did converse, however briefly, a verbal swordplay occurred between them; he knew she desired an apology for his behavior at the assembly; Darcy also
assumed
Elizabeth Bennet knew he had a
right
to such behavior. His distinct station in life afforded him an air of superiority. Darcy determined she flirted with him through the verbal assaults, and they worked remarkably. He could not offer any culpability to Bingley; he felt in nearly as bad of a position himself.
As Bingley and Darcy discovered themselves distracted by the Bennet ladies, Miss Bingley's acute awareness of the changes in her brother and of his esteemed friend increased her fervent rebukes, especially those directed toward the second Bennet daughter. Miss Bingley congratulated herself when Darcy openly expurgated Elizabeth Bennet's failings. He made observations about Elizabeth's not having an appealing countenance; he said with a critical eye her figure lacked any point of symmetry; and he asserted Elizabeth's manners showed no knowledge of fashionable acceptance. Yet, as he publicly castigated Elizabeth's virtues, privately, the fact he found her face possessing a soul of its own as her dark green eyes danced with life tormented him; he recognized her figure to be
light and pleasing; and he found her manners to have a relaxed playfulness.As Darcy's estimation of Elizabeth Bennet made a transition so did his appraisal of Miss Bingley. Uncharacteristically, he said so to his sister in a letter dispatched shortly after the assembly.
20 October
 
Dearest Georgiana,
Your letter of the 2nd brought me such delight; I would confess to having reread it daily of late as a way of keeping you lovingly in my heart. Bingley's estate possesses plausible attributes, and although it keeps me from your company, being in his service in this matter satisfies me. Miss Bingley and Mr. and Mrs. Hurst number among our party at Netherfield, and we suffer from varying degrees of country society. Duties of this nature, as you know, pain me, but I consent on Bingley's behalf.
We first undertook a local assembly. I found very little pleasing among those at the assembly, having experienced such behavior on prior occasions when duty called me to Lambton and other local villages. Detesting dancing with strangers only added to my discomfort. However, not wanting to discredit Bingley, I maintained my station with abridgement. I wish I could recall as much for Miss Bingley and her sister. I would never consider criticizing one of Miss Bingley's standing; yet, I found her behavior, in reality, not complimentary to her brother's desire. He does these things to advance Miss Bingley's status; yet, she repays him most unceremoniously.True, many at the assembly found them to be pleasant. However, I was not convinced; Bingley's sisters did not try to please anyone but themselves.The neighborhood, which lacks any sophistication, should not have been disposed to approve of their behavior.The Bingley sisters are fine ladies when they choose to be, but they allow their opinions of themselves to border on pride and conceit. Both Caroline and Louisa are rather handsome and each received private seminary educations. Miss Bingley possesses a fortune of twenty thousand pounds, although both women are, I fear, in the habit of spending more than they ought.They associate with fine
society and have a right to consider themselves privileged, but they should consider how meanly they treat others.
Their pride is a common failing and is, unfortunately, found in all circles.We all, I believe, display pride in some real or imaginary quality with some people cherishing these feelings of self-complacency. Maybe what the Bingley sisters display is vanity, but I argue vanity and pride differ.A person may be proud without being vain. Opinions of ourselves define our pride; what we have others think of us is our vanity.
Thankfully, our family has the benefit of generations of knowing what society expects.With Mrs.Annesley to guide you, my Dearest, I fear no such behavior from you. Georgiana, I must regretfully close. Please do not concern yourself, my girl, with thoughts of my happiness; when it is time for my taking a wife, I will find someone who will give us both affection as the mistress of Pemberley and as a devoted sister. I am anticipating your concert for my benefit. I am sure it will be one I will cherish forever as I do all of our times together. Praying that you too find all the happiness you so rightly deserve, I am your affectionate brother . . .
 
Fitzwilliam

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