Dance (18 page)

Fenix
had been right. The next morning the press and the internet exploded with
pictures of Jared snarling in the photographer’s face while shielding Fenix
behind him. Jared really tried to care, especially when he talked to the
producers, his agent, Adam... He tried to inject some remorse in his voice, but
the truth was he’d do it all over again tomorrow.

By
the time the two week summer break came, both Jared and Fenix desperately
needed a holiday. They needed to get out of London, out of the West End, out of
the public eye. Fenix suggested they go visit his family in New York, and Jared
readily accepted.

The
two weeks that followed were some of the best of Jared’s life. They warned
everyone who might want to get in touch that they didn't want to be disturbed
unless it was a matter of life or death. Most people respected that, but they
both got texts from their agents and their friends occasionally. Still, it was
more than they had hoped for when they’d made their request.

Fenix’s
parents were amazing. His dad was kind and patient, full of quiet charisma and
charm. He watched them with affection and pride when he thought Jared wasn't
looking, and even though he never said the actual words, Jared knew he was
happy for his son. Fenix had shared that his dad was a bit disappointed when
Fenix decided to plunge into a career of musical theatre because he knew all
the struggles his son was going to face. But it seemed like Eric Bergman had
made his peace with it and was proud of everything his son had achieved.

And his mum...
God! Jared had
been awe struck the first time he’d seen the great ballerina Evelyn Bergman in
person. She was still the striking woman she’d been on stage, regardless of the
wheelchair she now sat in. Evelyn was talkative and smiling and so genuinely
nice
. Fenix looked exactly like his
Scandinavian mother – tall and slim and blond haired. Sometimes, without
realising it, Evelyn would slip into speaking Swedish and both Fenix and his
dad would reply in her native tongue as if it was the most natural thing in the
world, until they realised they’d excluded Jared from the conversation and
switched back to English.

Fenix’s
parents tried to insist on them staying in their apartment, but Fenix knew
Jared would feel more comfortable in a hotel, and kindly declined. Despite
that, they went to dinner at Evelyn and Eric’s place almost every night.

Sitting
around the Bergman’s table, watching them talk and laugh, and share such close-knit
family connection, Jared wished he could offer Fenix the same. He wished he
could take Fenix back home to his mum now and then, have dinner and...
be
a family. But he knew he could never do that – he wasn't
welcome in his own childhood home anymore.

He
wasn't welcome in his mother’s heart anymore.

Fenix
must have sensed Jared’s sadness that enveloped him when he thought of his
mother, because he always found his hand under the table and squeezed. Jared
had told Fenix about his mum and he’d told him he was over that, that he’d made
peace with her decision, but Fenix could see right through him. He knew the
dull ache of his own mother’s rejection was still buried deep in Jared’s heart
and probably would always be.

After
dinner that first night, Fenix had taken Jared to see his childhood room. His
parents still kept it intact as if Fenix still lived there. They didn't need
the extra space of a spare room and saw no reason to destroy his childhood
memories, Fenix explained.

The
room’s walls were covered floor to ceiling with Broadways posters, musical
programmes, tickets, drawings, printed out quotes... It was a shrine to Fenix’s
dream.

Fenix
talked about Broadway often, and Jared accepted that as a part of him, of his
interests. He’d never thought of his obsession with Broadway as Fenix’s dream,
even though he’d mentioned multiple times how he’d love to star in a Broadway
musical someday.

Now
though, Jared got it. He got a glimpse at Fenix’s childhood, at the way he’d
been raised watching his mother
perform,
going to
musicals, learning all there was to know about Broadway.

He
also realised, for the first time, that London’s West End was Fenix’s stepping
stone. It wasn't where he really wanted to be. How could he have not seen that
sooner? Fenix had
told
him multiple
times that he dreamed of performing on Broadway. Why had Jared blocked it out?

What
would happen if, no –
when
, Broadway
came knocking on their door?

The
sudden fear that overtook Jared’s mind was too much to bear. He didn't want to
spoil their holiday and wonder about
the what
ifs.
They’d cross that bridge when they came to it. If there was one thing Jared was
confident about, it was that their bond was stronger than anything life could
throw at them.

They
went to see as many shows as they could cram into two weeks. Fenix was like an
overexcited child – he smiled so broadly that his cheeks must have sustained
permanent damage. His eyes were full of so much joy, so much awe and enthusiasm
that Jared couldn't help but catch some of that Broadway bug too.

The
end of their holiday came faster than they expected. Between sightseeing in New
York, Broadway shows, and dinners with Fenix’s family, time flew incredibly
fast. The night before they had to go back home, Jared’s phone rang and
vibrated on the coffee table in their hotel room. It caused quite the racket,
but Jared was too busy sinking his cock into Fenix’s warm, pliable body to pay
it any attention. It started going off again later that night and Jared
groaned, unwillingly leaving Fenix’s sleeping form in bed as he padded across
the room to get it. Just as he picked up, he heard Fenix’s phone ringing from somewhere
inside the pile of clothes next to the bed. Fenix stirred and growled deep in
his throat.

Jared
smiled and looked at the display – it was his agent Samantha
Durell
. She had been his agent ever since he’d graduated
from
LAMDA
. She’d chased him mercilessly until he
agreed to sign with her, because she definitely didn’t look like someone Jared
wanted to represent him. Samantha was tall, thin as a stick, with dark hair cut
into an elegant bob every three weeks, and the most piercing, intelligent grey eyes
Jared had ever seen. Add all that to her posh upbringing, her Oxford University
education, and her rich family and Jared didn't want to touch her with a
bargepole. He’d always imagined his agent as more of an old school, hippy,
in
-love-with-the-theatre-and-the-arts kind of person.

“Hey, Sam.
What’s up?”
Jared said after he slid his finger along the display to accept the call. If
she hadn’t left a message and continued to call, even though she knew they were
on holiday, then it must be something important.

Jared
watched Fenix as he flopped on his belly and stretched his arm down towards his
clothes, looking for his own ringing phone.

“Sorry
to bother you so late, Jared. But I have great news,” she practically squealed
which was really weird coming from his posh, always collected agent. “
Of Kids and Monsters
has been nominated
for a Laurence Olivier award – Best Entertainment and Family!” Samantha
declared proudly.

“What?”
Jared rasped, his voice suddenly refusing to work properly. The Laurence
Olivier awards were the UK’s answer to the
Tonys
and
Jared had never even dreamt of being nominated for one. They weren’t known for
their sympathy for musical theatre aimed at younger audiences.

“You
heard me!”

“Wow,
I don't know what to say, Sam. That’s amazing!” Jared’s head was still
spinning. After all the hard work he’d put into this show, the critics finally
started to appreciate it.

“It
is. But it gets better,” Sam said, her voice dripping with satisfaction.

“It
does?” How can it get better than this?

“Yes.
Your boy Fenix and his show have been nominated too! Best Actor in a Musical as
well as Best New Musical.”

Jared’s
head snapped in Fenix’s direction and he saw that his boyfriend had just gotten
the same news from whoever was calling him. Fenix grinned at him from where he
was sitting in the messy bed and raised his fist in a gesture of victory.

“I
gotta
go, Sam. Thank you so much for calling. We’ll
be back tomorrow and I’ll come to see you next week, OK?”

Jared
hung up the phone just when Fenix hung up his and raced to the bed, falling on
top of Fenix.

“Congratulations,”
he murmured before he took Fenix’s mouth in a deep, hungry kiss. He wasn't sure
what he was happier about, his or Fenix’s nomination. But both together – Jared
was
ecstatic!

“You
too,” Fenix managed to say before Jared overpowered him with his body, pinned
him to the mattress, and didn't give him a chance to say another word.

Chapter seventeen

Fenix

Fenix could not
look away from Jared’s eyes as he moved on top of him. The intensity in them,
the love and desire and hope and faith that shone in them in the dim early
morning light coming from their bedroom window, sent shivers all over his body.
Fenix’s skin prickled with goosebumps as Jared moaned under him and flexed his
hips upwards, getting impatient with Fenix’s slow, sensual movements.

“For fuck’s sake, Fen!
Ride me faster
or I swear to God I’ll flip you over and fuck you through the bed and you won't
be able to perform for a week.”

Fenix
smiled evilly and leaned down to kiss his boyfriend. Jared grabbed his face and
attacked his mouth with barely-contained ferocity. Man, Fenix loved when Jared
got all hot and bothered, unable to control himself. He loved that
he
was the one to make Jared snap and
overreact, and get a little rough – just as Fenix liked it.

“We
wouldn’t want that now, would we? I think we should keep it slow and gentle to
make sure my ass will be up for tonight’s show,” Fenix murmured against Jared’s
lips, and rolled his hips agonizingly slow to get his point across.

“Is
that so?”

“That
is so,” Fenix whispered in Jared’s ear and bit on his soft earlobe, while he
continued to move leisurely on top of him.

The
growl that escaped Jared’s throat made Fenix’s cock twitch and achingly hard.
With one swift, graceful movement Jared flipped them around, pinning Fenix
underneath him.

“You
like to provoke me, don't you,
love
?” Jared said, a
wicked smile pulling at the corners of his full lips. Fenix was just about to
reply with a witty come back when Jared thrust his cock so deep inside him that
he saw stars.

There
was no more talking. All that could be heard in the early Saturday morning were
their harsh breaths, pleasure filled moans, and sweat covered bodies grinding
together.

“I
love you,” murmured Fenix as he reached his climax. He knew that would bring
Jared over the edge too, because as dirty and rough their sex usually was,
underneath it all the love they shared always showed.

Later, after
they’d cleaned up as much as they could with a damp towel, Fenix listened to
Jared’s calming heartbeat as he rested his head over his chest. It was the
morning after the Laurence Olivier awards when they had both won, in a way.
Fenix had won the award he had been nominated for – Best Actor in a Musical and
Poison
had won Best New Musical.
Of Kids and Monsters
had won Best
Entertainment and Family and since it was Jared’s creation, he had proudly
walked on stage and accepted the award. Jared was graceful enough not to shove
his way to the front and grab the award. He let the director and the producers
take all the limelight as he hung back with the rest of the cast. But they had
made him go forward and say a few words, acknowledging that, without Jared,
they’d never be here. He had pulled Adam along with him – after all it had been
both of them who had originally created, produced and directed the musical.

Fenix
yawned and felt the familiar post-sex relaxed daze settle over his mind. He
inhaled Jared’s scent through his nose, kissed the warm skin on his chest, and
closed his eyes. His half-conscious mind drifted off and his last thought
before he fell asleep was how perfect his life was – he was an award winning
star in London’s West End; he was healthy and happy and strong enough to
perform every night for weeks on end; and he had the most loving, gorgeous,
amazingly talented fellow performer for a boyfriend.

Life
could not get any better than this.

Only it did.

Fenix’s
phone rang just as he was following Jared into the bathroom for a well-deserved
shower and, hopefully, round two of Saturday sex.

“Go
ahead, baby, it’s Cathleen. I’m right behind you,” Fenix said as he slid his
finger over the screen to take his agent’s call.

“I
hope so, it’s your turn,” said Jared and winked, heading into the bathroom.
Fenix stared after him, appreciating the hard muscles on his back and his
perfect, round ass.