Daddy Long Stroke (43 page)

“This year we decided to have a breakfast instead of dinner, so this way everyone gets to have the rest of the day with their own
families. And we won't have to worry about anyone getting drunk. 'Cause you know how your aunts and uncles get when there's booze around.”

I laugh, knowin' them lushes would drink toilet water, if it'd get 'em drunk. “Ma, you know like I do, breakfast or not, they gonna come strapped wit' flasks.”

She laughs. “And you're probably right. But I got something for all their asses. I'm gonna be checking bags, coats, and pocketbooks as everyone comes through the door, and confiscating anything that contains alcohol in it.”

I join in her laughter. “Sounds like it's gonna be a full house.”

“You got that right; close to forty. Your cousin Dana and her family are here from Hawaii. And Brian and his are in from London.”

“Wow, I haven't seen them in years,” I say, sittin' up in bed. Dana ran off to the army at eighteen, retired at thirty-eight and has made her home in Hawaii. She's married to a retired army captain and has four children. Her brother, Brian, is also retired from the army and has lived in London for almost ten years with his wife and six children.

Between my moms' four sisters and her three brothers, she has 'bout twenty-two nieces and ten nephews. And nine of 'em popped outta Aunt Brenda's box. Then there's like forty-seven great-nieces and nephews. Although most of 'em no longer live in Jersey, it's still too damn many of 'em; especially for a muhfucka like me who ain't used to havin' a buncha kids and noise around.

“Are you coming over? Everyone's been asking about you, and they'd love to see you.”

Hell no!
I ain't beat for all them muhfuckas so early in the mornin'. The last time I went to a family function, Moms' sister Ella got pissy drunk and snatched off their other sister's wig, then
tossed it into the punch bowl. Man, listen…Aunt Betty was hot! She turned 'round and tossed her drink in Aunt Ella's face, then they got to cursin' each other out, airin' out each other's dirt. By the time they finished, we knew that Aunt Betty used to sneak outta the house and fuck white men on the railroad tracks for money when they were growin' up, and Aunt Ella had four abortions. And two of 'em were 'cause she was fuckin' their sister Lanette's husband for almost four years. Uncle Benny almost shitted in his drawers when she spilled the beans. And Aunt Ella's husband, Larry, jumped up and started hookin' off on Benny. They tossed Aunt Betty's crib up.

“Tell e'eryone I said hello, and that I send my love. But, I'ma haveta sit this one out.”

“Boy, and you sat last year's out as well.”

“Yep, I sure did,” I say, laughin'. “Just make sure you pack me a plate.”

“Yeah, I'll pack you a plate alright, smart ass. Are you stopping by tonight for dinner?”

“And you know it. I wouldn't miss it.”

“Well, then, I'll see you later on tonight. Love you.”

“I love you, too,” I say, smilin'. I get outta bed, take a piss, then jump back in bed ready to go back to sleep. But the phone keeps ringin'. Falani calls, then Maleeka, then Electra, then Vita—all of 'em hittin' a muhfucka up to bring holiday cheer. By the time I get off the phone, I have invitations from all four hoes to come through for some pussy. My cell rings, again.
Fuck!
I sigh, pickin' it up off the dresser and glancin' at the screen. I accept the call.

“Merry Christmas, baby,” Cherry cheerfully sings into the phone the minute I answer.

“Same to you,” I say, yawnin'. “How you?”

“Horny as hell,” she says. “I need another dose of that good stuff.”

I laugh. “Damn, you feenin' like that?”

“Yeah, I don't know what's going on with me. Ever since you left, my kitty box has been purring for that long, chocolate bone.”

“Yeah,” I say, slippin' my hands down into my basketball shorts. “What kitty wanna do wit' it?”

“She wants to sit on it, ride it. Fuck it 'til she weeps and aches.”

“Oh, word?”

She moans.

“Yo, stop that 'fore you get my dick hard.”

She laughs. “Oh, it's not hard?”

“Nah,” I lie. But the shit's rock solid. I squeeze it. “But if you keep talkin' slick, it will be.”

“I'm already slick…slippery wet, thinking about all the nasty things I wanna do to you.”

I shake my head, strokin' my dick. I get outta bed, strip off my shorts, then go into my closet and pull out my “My Baby Got Back” sex doll. “Yo, you feel like a phone bone?”

She moans. “Oh, yessssss. Let me grab my dildo.”

“How big is it?”

“Big as you,” she says, makin' slurpin' and suckin' sounds. “But not as good.”

“That's wassup. What you doin'?”

“I'm suckin' all over your big, black dick, baby.”

“Aaah, yeah…take it deep in ya mouth. Open wide, baby…suck on that shit…tighten ya lips 'round it…” She continues makin' dick suckin' sounds, moanin'. “Aaah, yeah…oh, shit…you wanna suck my balls?” She moans. “…Aaah, fuck, suck them big, heavy muhfuckas…”

We go back 'n forth for 'bout ten minutes of her pretendin' she's puttin' her best lip work down on this dick, but, since I already know the bitch can't wet a dick right, it's hard for a muhfucka
to get into it. I squirt a large amount of Astroglide inside my sex doll's pussy, then tell Cherry to lie on her back, bend her knees and let daddy run this dick up in her. I tell her to push the tip of her dildo inside her slit as I'm pushin' the head of my dick inside the doll. “Yeah, baby, that shit is tight…” She moans. I tell her to push it all in as I push more of my dick into this doll. She moans louder. I tell how I want her to bang up her hole as I'm bangin' up the doll. I turn the vibrator feature on high, and its pussy starts to beat against my dick. “Aaaah, fuck…aaah, shit. Gotdamn, you got that motor pussy…Aaah, that shit is churnin' all over this dick…” She moans and groans and screams out, lettin' me know she's nuttin'. I feel my nut risin' up in me, too. Ram my hips up into my rubber sex mate, then grunt and groan while pumpin' out my nut. “Damn, that shit was good,” I say, keepin' my dick inside the doll, slow-grindin' it. My shit's still hard.

“What are you doing after the holidays?”

I sigh, shakin' my head. I just left her two weeks ago and she's already tryna get me back out there. She's slowly tryna to turn this into sumthin' more than what it is. Although if I confront her on it, she'll say she's not. She'll say she just enjoys my company; that it's only sex for her and occasional companionship. But a muhfucka like me knows what it is. She's already fallen for a nigga. I grin. “I'ma be bringin' you your Christmas gift.”

“Oooh, and what might that be?”

“Me, baby,” I tell her before disconnectin' the call. I pull my dick outta my doll, flip it over, then plunge back in. Its hole is wet and gushy from all the Astroglide and nut up in it. “Aaah, shit,” I moan, fuckin' it deep from the back 'til I bust another nut. “'Tis the season to be muthafuckin' jolly,” I say, rollin' over on my back. I take a deep breath, close my eyes, driftin' off to sleep.

 36 

“I want to spend New Year's with you,” Vita says.

“Damn, baby, that's wassup. But you know I'm not workin', so my paper's light.”

“You know you don't have to worry about money, I got you. New Year's is next Thursday, so when do you wanna come?”

“Next Monday,” I tell her. She asks how long I wanna stay. I think. Decide to stay 'til Sunday.

“That's great!” she says excitedly. “That's almost a whole week. I'll call you back with all the details.”

“That's wassup. But dig, you gonna haveta chill out wit' all that coke snortin' you do. I'm not beat for that shit, feel me?”

“I thought you were cool wit' it.”

“Why, 'cause I blaze?”

“Well, yeah. And besides, I asked you if you were okay with it.”

“Listen, you can't compare burnin' trees to snortin' coke. I told you to do you 'cause I was up in ya spot, and I wanted some of that pussy. But, nah, I wasn't cool wit' you snortin' shit up in ya nose.”

“If you woulda said something, I wouldn't have done it around you.”

“Baby, you good. I'm tellin' you now. So is there a problem?”

“Not at all. I don't do it that often, anyway.”
Yeah, right. Who the fuck this lyin' bitch thinks she's talkin' to?

“Cool. You ready to give me some of that pussy?”

She giggles. “I've been ready. It's all I've been thinking about.”

I shake my head. “I'ma beat that pussy up, baby. I hope you been practicing on those dildoes I told you to get.” I told her ass a few weeks ago to go out and find herself a ten- and eleven-inch rubber friend to get her box in shape for the real deal. And she claims she has. We'll see. We talk for 'bout another five minutes or so before endin' the call.

The followin' week, I'm standin' outside Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport baggage claim, waitin' for Vita to scoop me up. She blows the horn, pullin' up just as I'm pullin' out my cell to hit her up to see where the fuck she is. It's brick out this bitch. Shit. I thought I was gonna be comin' down here to some warmer weather, and it feels like I'm still in muthafuckin' Jersey. This hawk is cuttin' through a muhfucka's bones. I quickly open the back door, toss my bag in. I'm surprised to see this pecan-brown honey sittin' in the back on the driver's side.
I hope this pumkin-head bitch ain't tryna front wit' her peeps like I'm her muthafuckin' man
, I think, openin' the front passenger door, then gettin' in. I look at Vita. Blink, blink again. She's changed her look up. She's wearin' what looks like a damn Beyoncé wig! Long, bronze-colored ringlets cascadin' down her back! If you asks me, it's too much damn hair for her lil' ass. And to top it off, she has the nerve to have muthafuckin' earrings the size of hula hoops danglin' from her ears. Lookin' at her reminds me of a preschooler bein' dressed up for Halloween. “What's good?” I say, shuttin' the door. I can tell Vita is expectin' some tongue or sumthin' by the way she tries to lean over toward me. “I see you changed up ya look.”

“Hey, sexy man,” she says, grinnin'. “You like?”

I grin. “It's different.”

She smiles. “Alley Cat, this is my cousin, Naomi. Naomi, this
Alley…uh, my friend Alex I was telling you about.” Her people says hello.

I turn my head, lookin' back at her sexy ass. Catch her grinnin' at me. I can see she's not a midget…uh, little person, like her cousin. I lick my lips on the sly. “Wassup?”

“Nothing much,” she says, shakin' her head. “I've heard a lot about you. Actually, you're all Vita talks about.”

Yeah, and I bet she got ya horny ass curious, too.
“Oh, word?”

“Girl, stop lying,” Vita snaps, laughin'. “He is not. I talk about other things, too.”

“Yeah, right. But you talk about him more. For a minute there, I thought she was making everything up.”

Vita laughs. “Oooh, bitch, you wrong for that! You know I wouldn't do that. Why are you tryna hate on me any-damn-way?” I'm kinda shocked to hear how Vita is talkin'.
This bitch thinks she's a hood goddess.
I wanna bust out laughin' 'cause she sounds funny as hell. But I keep quiet. Let them go back 'n forth as if I'm not in the car. “Girl, you know I ain't ever lied to you about anything.”

“Hmmph, yeah, that may be true. But, sweetie, you remember all those imaginary boyfriends you used to have growing up. Well, I really thought he was one of them.” She starts laughing. I cut my eye over at Vita as she speeds down Interstate 285. She looks tight that her blood is tryna play her. I chuckle, pullin' down the sun visor and slidin' back the slider for the mirror. I act like I got sumthin' in my eye.