Crossing the Line (23 page)

A
gents,” Simmonds said, nodding at each of us as we walked through the door. “Did you find what you were looking for?” he asked me.

I nodded once. “We did.” He gave me a hard, sympathetic look, but I didn't want to talk about it anymore. “What did you need us for?” I asked.

He took the hint and moved on. “The tech team decrypted the rest of the drive. I haven't had a chance to look at the data yet, but it's being uploaded to my computer as we speak.”

I drew a sharp breath, hoping this would give us everything we needed. Travis and I both stood in front of the chairs by the desk, waiting. I drummed my hand against my thigh, finding it impossible to keep still.

Simmonds started typing on his computer, sending the files to the empty screens behind him as he opened them. I scanned the documents quickly. They were too big for a cipher, and had already been translated to English. “These are mission files,” I said. My old code name caught my eye. “And some of them are mine?”

“It looks like it,” Travis said, taking a step closer to me.

Simmonds clicked on one of my files. It was a mission that I'd
been on within the last year to a research lab in India. I'd had to get a specific type of titanium.

I swallowed hard. I had a guess where this was going. “Were all of these missions retrievals?”

Simmonds flipped through a few files. “It looks like they were.”

Most of it was a mix of chemicals and metals that could be expected to come together for some kind of explosive, but then there were random things as well. Produce from specific fields in specific counties, minerals from specific mines, sand from a specific beach, and everyday chemicals that shouldn't play too much of a role compared with the more combustible elements.

“These have to be for Foster's weapon,” I said.

“I would say you're correct,” Simmonds said, staring at his computer. His eyes met ours for half a moment before he sent the image to the screen behind his desk. “I believe we've found out what KATO intends to do with Dr. Foster's research.”

It was plans for a missile. The bottom corner had a date that was six months old. “How long would it take to build something like this?” I asked.

Simmonds shook his head. “We really have no way of knowing.”

“But I would think if there are plans for a missile, and a record of these retrievals, it would mean that Foster's close to getting the components of his weapon together,” Travis said.

“I guess now we have a better idea of their timeline,” I said, letting my bitterness seep out.

“Their target has to be South Korea, right?” Travis turned to me for confirmation.

“Absolutely,” I said, nodding. “But they still need a way to move an army across the DMZ.” The land between the two Koreas was littered with land mines and explosives. It was called the Demilitarized Zone—or the DMZ. “They'd use the missile to take out the South's army and leaders, which would disrupt their defense system, then the North would send their people across the DMZ to complete the invasion. They can't move on any of this until they have a way across.”

Simmonds eyed me steadily. I didn't know what he was thinking, but I was sure I wasn't going to like it.

“What is it?” I asked. I couldn't handle that look.

He sighed. “A little over a year ago, a Japanese research lab was doing testing on hovercraft technology.” He paused for a beat, and seemed to be bracing himself. “It was referred to as Project Pegasus.”

My limbs went numb and my stomach dropped to my feet. I had stolen the plans for KATO, shooting Travis in the process. I met Travis's eyes, an expression of devastating understanding crossed his face.

I lowered into one of the chairs as the reality sank in. “I did this,” I said. I hunched over, putting my head in my hands. “If this works and they get a hold of South Korea, they'll pick another country to target. This could effectively start World War III and
I
gave them the technology.”

“You did what you had to at the time,” Travis said, his voice so quiet I was sure only I could hear it.

I tilted my head enough to see him through my fingers. “That really doesn't help.”

Travis pinched the bridge of his nose and turned back to Simmonds. “Sir, what do we do about this?”

“We need to split our resources between working out a plan to put a stop to KATO, and detecting any kind of weaponized attack coming out of North Korea.”

I straightened up, my eyes widened. “Detecting an attack? By the time that happens it'll be too late.”

“We don't have a choice,” Simmonds said. “They have all the tools they need to pull this off, and they've done an exceptional job keeping it quiet. At this stage, the only way we'd find out anything for sure is if we put people inside that agency. If there was any chance at success I might take that risk, but it's a suicide job.”

I stood up, pacing, trying to think of a solution. “I can find out,” I said. Just saying the words sent a rush of fear through me. But I had to do this. “I'll get in touch with them or—something. I'll find a way to get what we need.”

“How can you possibly get that information without tipping off that you're on our side?” Travis asked.

I bit my lip. “I don't know,” I said. “But I did this, so I have to fix it. I'm the only person who has a shot.”

“Except there's every chance that it won't work out,” Travis said. “And then they'll come after
you
.”

“I don't care.” And right then I didn't. This was my fault and I had to do something. I was too afraid to think about what it could mean. “They used me to make this happen. I can't just sit here and watch.”

“Jocelyn,” Simmonds said. “I
promise
you we will find a way to handle this. We simply need some time.”

“And what if we don't have it?” I asked. “For all we know, Foster's putting the finishing touches on the missile right now.”

Travis glanced at me out of the corner of his eye and shook his head. “No. You're not doing this.”

I rounded on him. This was about so much more than me. “I came here to hurt KATO. Now, this wasn't exactly what I planned, but this is how it's happening. I'm the only person in this agency that KATO thinks they can trust. I can come up with some cover story. Something to make it seem like their information is important to my assignment.”

“They'll know something is up the second you start asking questions,” Simmonds said. “And we'll lose any chance at building our access to their internal database.”

“And what good has that done?” I asked. “We know, what? Five side operations? Have you gotten
anything
relevant?” He stared at me silently, as if I were someone he'd never met. “That's what I thought.”

“
Jocelyn
—” Travis was angry, but I didn't care.

“No!” I snapped. “I'm doing this.”

I left the office, ignoring Travis, who was trying to negotiate with me. I needed to get away. I needed to think and come up with some kind of plan. I was terrified, but my determination kept moving me forward. I needed to act before I lost that. I had made it downstairs, and a hallway away from the building's door, when I heard Travis calling after me. “Jocelyn!”

I didn't respond. I was about to round the corner into the atrium when he tried again.

“Goddamn it, Jocelyn!” He must have sprinted to catch up to me, because the next thing I knew he had a hand on my arm, pulling me to a stop. “Do you even realize what you're risking?”

I tried to tug away from him, but his grip was too firm. “Let me go.”

“No!” The vein in his neck throbbed and I knew he was at his breaking point. “If you try and get more information from KATO they're going to know you're not working for them anymore. Do you get that? Do you
want
to end up back in their facility with a needle in your arm? Because that's where you're headed!”

“I don't need to be told what could happen to me.” I yanked my arm away from him. “This is
my
call, not yours.”

“Joss—”

I rounded the corner before he could say another word and came very quickly to a stop. We weren't alone. There were about a dozen agents gathered in the atrium. Nikki, Cody, and Rachel were among them. Travis's outburst hadn't been quiet, and judging from looks on their faces they had heard the whole thing. I felt Travis next to me and pivoted to face him, breathing heavily.

For the first time at the IDA I made no attempt to hide what I was feeling. I felt the anger and betrayal sprawled all over my face and I didn't care. All of the uncertainty about KATO made this feel so much worse. I was supposed to be able to count on him like I never could on anyone else.

Travis started at me, his eyes wide and apologetic. He opened his mouth to say something, but I didn't want to hear it. I turned my back on him and walked out the doors, moving as quickly as I could across the courtyard without running. Travis hurried after me. “Jocelyn.”

I kept moving.

“Jocelyn, I am
so
sorry.” He stepped in front of me.

“Get out of my way.” I wouldn't look him in the eye. I couldn't.

“Joss,
please
.”

I tried to push past him, but he grabbed my arms, and I reacted.
I kneed him in the stomach and twisted him to the ground, putting him behind me and out of my way. He didn't try to get up. He just looked at me with one of the saddest expressions I had ever seen. I turned on my heel and left him there.

I
paced my room for fifteen minutes after I had stormed out of the Operations Building. I needed to calm down enough to think, but I couldn't. I had never trusted
anyone
like I had trusted Travis, and he had managed to not only blow my cover but spill one of my biggest secrets. It didn't matter that it wasn't intentional. I exhaled steadily and made myself shift gears. It felt better to focus on what I could do to get to KATO.

There was no way I could let KATO know the IDA had the missile plans, but maybe if I hinted that the IDA knew something and asked a few follow-up questions, they might give me a clue about their timetable. It wasn't any kind of a solid plan, but it would mean I was
doing
something, which at that point was what I needed. I had yanked open my door, prepared to head out and get to a computer, when I found myself face-to-face with Simmonds.

His eyes narrowed. “I think it would be best if we talked before you went anywhere.”

I looked away from him, doing my best to bite my tongue. I knew he was planning to hold me back, so I really wasn't all that interested in what he had to say. But he didn't give me an option.

“Inside,” he said, gesturing to the room behind me.

I took a step back, defeated, and he followed me in.

“You cannot expect me to do nothing here,” I said, before he had the chance to talk. “Not when I'm the only one in a position to act.” I swallowed. “And not when I'm responsible.”

“You
aren't
responsible.” His face was tight, and his words strong, as if he were willing me to believe him. “If you didn't get those plans, they would have sent someone else.”

“But Travis would have beaten that person.”

“You don't know that,” he said. “Ultimately, you are not at fault for the actions of irresponsible people. What they are choosing to use these plans for is out of your control.”

I shifted back on my heels. I didn't agree with him, but I didn't want to fight about it. “I
have
to do something.”

“And I need you to wait.” I opened my mouth to argue, but Simmonds talked over me. “This is a major threat, Jocelyn. You are not equipped to handle it on your own. This isn't even something the IDA normally deals with. Traditionally I would pass it over to CIA or another agency.”

“Then why don't you—?”

“Because we
can't
.” His tone was sharp and final enough to force me quiet. “The only reason we know this is really happening is because of
you
.” He held my eyes for a moment. “Dr. Foster's research was never published, which means no one really knows what it entails. And that man is so revolutionary, I'm not even sure another scientist would understand the concepts without Foster there to explain them. So those plans and that list of retrievals don't add up to a definitive threat on their own.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose trying to process this, but Simmonds continued. “To anyone else, North Korea is merely building a missile, which isn't good, but it also wouldn't be their first. Nothing about this shows any sign of being an immediate issue without Foster, and as far as most of the world is concerned, he's been taken by the Chinese. You're the only person who is in a position to tell us otherwise. And while your word is enough for me, it isn't going to be enough for any government official in
any
country to risk people and resources without more concrete intel. Not with your history. Which means this is up to us.”

I felt my resolve wearing down. He was making too much sense. “Then what are we going to do?”

“Right now, I need some time.” He paused briefly, and this time I didn't try to interrupt. “We've only ever had four missions into North Korea in the history of the IDA. We contain them from the outside because getting in and out is so challenging. And while I agree that this time it's worth it, we are not moving in until we have a
solid
plan. If we don't, they'll win anyway, and if that happens we'll lose some of our best people. People I will need to prevent this from spreading beyond South Korea.”

I exhaled heavily. “How much time do you need?”

“Give me forty-eight hours,” he said. “If I don't have something feasible by then, we can reevaluate our strategy.”

I bit my lip. I hated the thought of waiting, but Simmonds was right. This was bigger than I could take on with the situation as it was. “Okay,” I said, nodding. “Forty-eight hours.”

Simmonds gave me a nod of thanks, and then left me to simmer in peace.

 • • • 

I couldn't sleep that night. I intended to stick to my forty-eight-hour promise, but that didn't make it any easier to turn my mind away from all of the new developments.

My alarm went off at seven the next morning and I silenced it after the second beep. I closed my eyes for the first time all night and tried to find the strength to get out of bed. When I finally did get up, I took as long as possible getting ready, as if it would somehow make time move slower. I was hoping to avoid everyone, so I didn't get to breakfast until after the morning workout and classes had started. But I wasn't that lucky. I had just gotten my food when I saw Travis out of the corner of my eye moving in my direction. Fortunately the cafeteria was practically empty.

“I need to talk to you,” he said, coming to a stop on my right.

I gripped my tray tighter, moving purposefully toward a table. I couldn't deal with this now. Not when KATO could be shooting off a missile at any second.

“I know you can hear me.” His voice had an edge to it. One that I was pretty sure he didn't have a right to.

“Then take the hint,” I said through gritted teeth.

“Jocelyn—”

“No!” I slammed my tray down on the table “You don't get to say my name like that.” I looked him in the eye for the first time since yesterday. “I
trusted
you.”

“I know.” I heard the regret in his voice, but it didn't affect me. “But it's going to be fine. We can still protect your cover, and no one cares about the other—”

I nearly dropped him again. “Don't give me that. It was
my
secret.
Not yours.”

A door opened behind Travis, and I saw Cody, Rachel, and Nikki fall in behind him. I wasn't sure how much they had heard, but I knew it was more than I wanted them to.

Travis started to speak again, but I turned away from him before he could get a word out.

“You need to get away from me,” I said. He didn't move. “
Now.
”

I watched him, staring him down until he finally left the room.

“So,” Cody said, coming closer. “What he said yesterday was true?”

I glared at him over my food. “What, were you all waiting for me?”

“More like waiting for him,” Cody said. “For what it's worth, he feels like shit about it. I tried to get more out of him, but he wouldn't give anything else up. It didn't even matter that he already let things slip. And Simmonds benched him until further notice.”

I bit my lip and turned away. “That doesn't make me feel any better.”

“Yeah,” he said. “I figured it wouldn't.” He sighed. “I doubt this will mean much to you either, but I'm sorry for everything. You really hurt Rachel, and I wanted to have her back. But I should have known what it meant for Travis to have yours. So, I'm sorry I didn't listen to him. Or to you.”

I swallowed hard and nodded. Cody left after that and Rachel followed him.

Nikki lingered behind. She waited for me to acknowledge her, but I started eating instead, not at all in the mood to talk. She only let herself be ignored for so long. She sat down across from me and pulled my tray right out from underneath me. I tugged it back, but she didn't
let go. “Nikki, come on.”

“No,” she said. “
You
come on.” Her face was angry and set. “I get that there are some things you had to keep secret, but now that it's out there, you're hiding from me? From
me
?” She paused, giving me a chance to talk, but I didn't have any words. “I've given you a lot of slack because you needed
someone
to. And because I believed you were a good person, regardless of what anyone thought. You owe me.”

I looked away for a moment. She was right about all of it. “This isn't really something I want to talk about.”

Nikki leaned closer. “But it's something
I
want to talk about it.” I met her eyes. “You're my friend, and I want to know what happened to you.”

I sighed. She was begging for some kind of explanation, and she deserved that much. “You heard the basics,” I said. “KATO made me strong so they could use me, and then they weakened me so no one else could. They drugged me so I'd
need
them.” I took a breath. “I
hated
that I needed them so much.”

She grabbed my hand. “But you beat them,” she said. “Why was this such a big secret?”

“I haven't beaten anyone yet,” I said. “I'm working on something bigger, and there's a lot at stake.”

She didn't fish for any more details. “I hope I don't even have to say this,” she said. “But just so you know, if you're working on any kind of plan, you can count me in.”

I blinked, surprised, but nodded. Things were still up in the air with Simmonds, but that wasn't going to last for too much longer. And if he didn't have a plan, I'd need one of my own.

 • • • 

By the time I'd gotten to Lee's class, I'd had my fill of pity. Since she had already known the truth it made my first class a little bit easier. It also helped that the kids didn't know anything, with Sam, of course, the exception.

He slipped into his seat just a few minutes late as always. “I guess you've had an interesting twenty-four hours.” He took his phone out, only bothering to give me half a glance.

I didn't even question how he knew. “That's one way to put it.”

He nodded, but still didn't look up. “Well, just so you know, I meant what I said earlier. If you need help with—
anything
—let me know.”

“You're the second person who's told me that today,” I said.

He flashed me a knowing, wicked smile. “Nikki and I might have talked.”

I sighed. “We're in a little bit of a holding pattern right now.”

He shrugged. “Okay. But if it's the upper management you're worried about, I can help you out. I know a few backdoor tricks to keep people off your scent long enough to get you into the field. At least in theory. I've never had the chance to try them out.”

I wasn't quite thinking anything that big, but it was nice to have options. “Are you ready for that kind of mission?”

Sam leaned back, finally making eye contact. “Honestly? I have no idea. But you're better off with me than with no one.”

“Thanks, Sam.” I bit my lip to hide a smile. “I'll let you know.”

He gave me a one-shouldered shrug, slid back into his chair, and put his attention back on his phone. I did my best to listen to Agent Lee, who was explaining the basics of aerial assessments, but the only thing in my mind was KATO. If Simmonds couldn't come up with
anything new in two days I was, at the very least, making contact—regardless of the risks.

 • • • 

Shockingly, my classes had ended up being the relaxing part of my day. If the other teachers had learned the truth, they didn't show it. Agent Reynolds still seemed to think I was up to something, and Agent Scott ignored me as he always did. And at this point I was pretty sure I could end world hunger and I would still be on Agent Harper's shit list. It wasn't until the afternoon training session that I faced any kind of challenge.

Nikki had offered to work out with me, but I wasn't looking to hold back. My thoughts kept coming back to KATO, and Travis, and I wanted to pound something without having to be careful. I took to my corner with a punching bag and did my best to turn off my mind.

I saw Travis on the other side of the room watching me. We made eye contact for the briefest of moments, and then I turned back to my bag, hitting it so hard my hands stung. Travis took a step in my direction, but Cody stopped him with a hand on his chest. They were too far away for me to hear exactly what was being said, but I could imagine it had something to do with me. From what I could tell, Cody was trying to talk Travis out of something, but Travis's face was set.

I shook my head and tried to focus on what I was doing, but it was getting harder and harder to keep my attention where it needed to be. And then Travis grabbed my bag. I punched it hard one more time, pushing it into him. He grunted and glared at me, but he was smart enough to keep his mouth shut.

“When are you going to get it?” I asked. “There's nothing I want to say to you.”

His jaw tightened. “You're going to have to talk to me eventually.”

“You want to bet?” I punched the bag again, and again he grunted.

“I'm sorry, okay?” He dropped his voice so I was the only one who could hear him. The emotion in his eyes was so raw it startled me.

I shook my head hard. “No,” I said. “I can't do this.” It was more a reminder to myself than it was to him, but he wasn't deterred regardless.

“Jocelyn—”

I punched the bag one more time. Harder than I had punched it all day. Hard enough that he couldn't keep the pain to himself anymore.

“Goddamn it!”

He let the bag go and hunched over, but I didn't care. I spun away from him and found another punching bag. Travis didn't interrupt me again.